What women want in bed, ahhhh, the mysteries of the keys to the female mind and her sexuality, are highly sought after by many, including we women! We women don’t even know this stuff! Is it technique, is it size, is it endurance, is it a cute little thing you all do with that towel trick we all pretend we’ve never seen, is there a drug that will unleash our inner slut, and if so, where do we get that pill…what is it that turns us females on! And half of us don’t know EITHER…so here we go…the magical mystery tour of female sexuality coming up…or how to get her to wear just high heels when she takes out the trash at YOUR house! And do it with GLEE! And maybe, just maybe, every week. But, guys, you have to be very very good first!

First and foremost gentlemen, it really isn’t a size issue, although you all almost wish it was, because then you’d understand it at least. And it isn’t endurance and it isn’t technique, although technique is pretty important, oh yes is it, my oh my oh my!…But the first stop on our magical mystery tour, is the female mind, that mysterious confusing place the keys reside in, the location of the holy grail, hidden deep with in every woman, is the first place we shall visit. And with this, begins the solutions to it all. You must enter her mind, and lead her to this new place, by the hand and gently. It isn’t a quick trip and it takes time and patience. You have to lead the way, as every self respecting Don Juan knows, you are the guide and the leader, and in this one thing, you have to lead, or you won’t ever get there gentlemen, with many women. And for those of you, who have women who don’t ever seem to want to, this is how you fix that. And guys, there isn’t a woman out there that hasn’t faked it at least once in a while, although I will probably get flamed for that statement, it is what they all tell me, however…

Here’s a side note to consider: Women don’t envy joysticks, men just WISH they did, and like so many things in life, the theory is bass ackwards …Men envy pussy’s, it’s PUSSY ENVY in reality! And all men all want one (or more, fess up guys! Or more! Most of you would take two, cause they’re small, and maybe one to go to snack on later, it’s true, if you could, you’d all have harems and I, at least, know this!) of their very own…that LIKES them and WANTS them, even CRAVES them at times, ooh, yes, all boys want one of THOSE!…so once upon a time, someone decided to market the philosophy that women envy joysticks and that they all want one, in the hopes it would convince women they did, and they then WOULD want a PENIS (or more, lol) of THEIR very own, and all you men would have a wonderful life. And to men, life would be soooo simple and so perfect, if all women craved cock like men crave pussy, just think men? Of how wonderful life would be with this hungry insatiable slut waiting for you to give her more of your precious fluids and begging for your pleasure wand, but in reality, nothing would ever get done, because all we would all do is Bleep, Bleep Bleep, and that’s why it doesn’t happen that way! And yes I’m serious! No work would get done, no buses would run, there’d be no power, we’d all still live in caves and we’d die young and very happy, although a bit hungry and chilly from lack of food and heat. It is just yet another example of a typical male solution to the problem of females unpredictability and unfathomability and why there are two sexes, because without both, the world would be incomplete. If women only ran the world, we’d all shop full time and you men would do nothing by paint as we changed from pink to cream to I think that beige is too deep, to pale hints of yellow, not canary mind you, and not lemon, more a shade above cream. If men only ran the world, women would wear pig tails and garter belts and we wouldn’t need transportation, because we wouldn’t ever leave the house because all any of us would ever do is, Bleep Bleep Bleep, so inessence, there is balance in having some of both for all of us. And there is away to get it (well at least some) guys. It is not however a one step solution, nor is it easy to come by as many of you have figured out
by now.

Women think in great swooping circles, and for all of you who think I’m a man, this should end that question for you. I am a woman, and as such, I do think in curves and arcs and round abouts. All women do, and we hide things even on ourselves and we don’t know, we really don’t, even if we think we do, and yes we will argue, and we often do, and in some ways we do know, but we’ll never tell you what we do know, so we don’t always know what we think we do. Got it? See? I am female…! I can do that all night and day, round and round I go! Only a woman could! And yes we do get a bit confusing. But you men often confound us with your logic and reason too.

The reason we are so damned confusing is, in a nutshell, we even confuse ourselves, period. We don’t fake being confusing, we are so good at it we don’t even know how to unconfuse ourselves, or to stop being confusing to anyone, or that we are in fact confusing! We’ll tell you we aren’t confused, YOU are, and you know you are, you just can’t seem to get us to understand that you really are, because we are. Did I make that clear enough? And IF no one teaches us about our sexuality, it remains this great mystery to us all, with varying degrees of response or the lack there of, in any of us. We don’t know what it is, or how to deal with it, or even how to control it, and some of us did get lucky and have a sexual mentor or
mother who gave us direction, but most of us didn’t. So, to gain control of a woman’s sexuality, you must work with her mind, and for those of you who weren’t planning to go up that far, that’s what it takes to reach her sexual responses, so in some ways, it is about being figuratively large enough to reach her mind, if not with your physical attributes, your intellectual ones, and it is as simple as that. Metaphorically speaking, that is what the size thing is really about, you got to go up that far guys! And yes this is complex, because women’s minds aren’t simple places, let alone easy to delve into, and it is easy to get lost in the maze we all have in our little brain cavaties, as most of you have long since figured out! A woman’s mind can be beautiful but it can be filled with all sorts of crazy stuff too. To get through that, is to reach what represses her and in so doing, help set her free from that repression that keeps her from being the sexually aware creature all women can be.

Did I make that clear enough? Because yes I think in great swooping circles. And anyone who walks continuously in a circle gets lost. And they get dizzy and they make no progress at all, which is very typically female, we’ve done it so long, it feels very normal to us to spin round and round, and we women understand this in each other, so we really think it’s you guys who are sort of confused and don’t get it.
You have to teach us to go straight just as we show you how to bend some.

Not everyone does have the same level of passion with in them, some people have TONS of it, repressed or
not, others have very little. Many are in between somewhere, and libidos are part of the entire response
system network, But if she or HE isn’t aware of how much they have, or if those responses are repressed,
they have even less interest or willingness to engage in pleasurable sexual activities, because they aren’t
all that pleasurable. Most can be improved on however with some of these techniques and the knowledge of how
to generate and increase those responses from inside the person, via techniques and pre-intimacy and even
through romantic evenings and fun interactions that couples learn to use to get the blood bubbling and the
fires started with in them.

We’re the one’s who won’t stop and ask for directions, not you men! Men ask directions all the time, and the
only time we women won’t run off at the mouth is when it’s about what we wish you’d do in bed, so we don’t
give you those directions and then we blame you for getting lost! The problem is we don’t know either. No
one tells us. We either aren’t really sure what we do want, OR we’re sort of scared and nervous and caught
up in all the myths that we’re supposed to be naturally sexual and hot, and if we say, oh hey, I’m
not all that sexual and hot, we become less of a woman even in our own minds, we women brag to each other
even about how sexy we are, it is very much like men and their bravado with each other. We all want to be
sexually coveted, we all wish and believe we’re the studs! We project it to other women even that oh yeah,
we had hot sex last night, let me tell ya! And to then address it with words, is beyond many women. We can
talk, we can’t talk about that, cause THEN you’d KNOW! Which if you know, we do, and if we do, then we have
to think about it, and if we think about it, we’ll have to worry, and if we worry, you REALLY aren’t
going to get any, because we’ll want to go wash the floor so we get what’s worrying us off our mind! Got
that? Any of you still doubt I’m female? I can talk like this for fifty pages without taking a breath or
injecting punctuation, uh? I can too!

We worry about your inadequacy thing if we tell you that God if you’d only use your hand TOO, and we feel
INADEQUATE and shy, or we’re into this good girls will and bad girls don’t thing and we aren’t even sure if
we should respond, or if that then makes us bad. So, you fellas have to do it for us. And listen to our
little hints and metaphors and sort through it all to figure out what we’re saying, or no slut tonight guys!
Sorry, we don’t know how to let her out! We’re not even sure we want to let her out! So if you want her
to come out you have to do it. You want to be our master and our friend, our lover and our salvation,
well than take the damned wheel and drive! But for heavens sake find out where we need to go first. This
is not an easy thing to find without some pre planning and a pretty good idea of what you need to find and
do. Or we’d all have figured it out by now! DUH!

Women, have brought up the theory of pre-intimacy, that age old, ok, I’ll pre-intimacy ya baby , solution to it
all, and we do need pre-intimacy, we ALL do, and gentlemen if you don’t believe that you aren’t doing it right,
seriously. We women aren’t men, our sexuality is internalized, not externalized like a man’s is. And
the art of lovemaking isn’t about instant gratification it’s about delaying that gratification
and letting it build, its riding it like a rollercoaster, thru dips and hills and whooshing down
a drop while the screams are forced from our lungs, it’s talent, it’s technique, but it’s also and art
that goes far beyond having orgasm as it’s only goal, it’s pleasure, pleasure, and sensations combined with
feelings and thoughts and deeds. It’s communication between two bodies on a primal level and it’s love and
uniting as one. And guys, if you try it you will like it, this whole pre-intimacy delaying thing is very VERY
fun for you too. There is nothing to hurry about, and for those that feel they must, take care of it
yourself then, if that’s all it means to you!

It is essential for a female, although there are times, when she DOESN”T need it, after she’s learned
how to be sexual, but NOT before. pre-intimacy is more than fifteen minutes, it can be more than an hour, it
can be more than four nights straight, gentlemen! And if you have a woman in your life, who says, all she
wants to do is cuddle, by golly you may be looking at six weeks of pre-intimacy to break through that block she
NEEDS you to get through, and no, you aren’t getting any during that time. Life can be harsh, but at the
end of that tunnel can be a lot of darned fun. And what the hell at least you’ll walk around looking
dazed for awhile, even if you’re lower lip does tremble a bit!

THAT is fore play. And with time, and technique, you can cut it down to even fifteen minutes on the right
night, but not until her sexuality is unleashed. Bottom line, you have to find the slut within and then
unleash it to be able to have her loose at your house on command, and any well trained dominant on this site
knows this.

Now, I hate to overstate what would appear to be obvious, but guys, GIRLS aren’t boys. Now that sounds
pretty simple in theory, but it isn’t. You need to keep that in mind too…Women react differently then men
do, we need different things to feel good, and we like different things than you men do in bed. PERIOD. And
if you argue that or fight it, well, don’t even complain she isn’t in the mood. A lot of those things
are things you will enjoy too, but, you have to unleash that sexuality before you get any of those. It
is abit like having to unzip your pants, but in essence, our sexuality isn’t that easily accessible
for anyone, whether we wear panties or not. And I don’t care if she’s 18 or 80, that’s the answer. And
if you don’t like the answer, well, I’m sorry, I can’t change the facts and the reality of it, I can just try
to explain it. I didn’t plan this infrastructure and interactive platform, I just understand it better than
I once did. I can operate it now.

I have read sex books and how to books, and erotica and stories, I have looked for solutions causes, ideas
and formulas, and no one ever addresses the problem from the stand point that things and life isn’t
normal, for everyone and all, and that sexuality is very repressed in modern American women, and to
unleash it you must find away to undo that repression. The premise is that every woman should indeed have a
sexual on button, and does, it’s like the power of positive thinking or ostriches hiding their heads in
the sand, if we don’t talk about it and tell everyone it doesn’t exist, MAYBE it’ll go away, and won’t
exist! So we’ll just say every woman is indeed ready to leap forth into her sexuality with a small modicum
of touching, a glass of wine, a lingering kiss and smile, and that normal women like sex instantly and
take to it like a duck to water. And it ain’t so guys.


And if your spouse hands you this, she is trying to tell you something she can’t figure out how to say any
other way. She’s saying oh yeah, this is so right on, at last…help me, please and we can indeed do whatever
you want and this is what I need. And guys you may have to hand it to her to read. And then listen as she
shyly says, well, yeah there’s some good stuff in it, um, what’s on TV? Cause that’s how women deal with sex
when it’s in their face, they are afraid to discuss it! It confuses them, makes them blush, and they are
frightened to ever say, oh Hey, I’m frigid! So are you like ok with that? That would be a bit like men saying
Oh hey, I’m impotent, no big deal, wasn’t big enough anyway! OH yeah THAT’ll happen, you betcha! Well we
feel the same way, frigid women aren’t sexy! We aren’t cool, we’re what you all hate and fear and go yuck
about! So we, at least in our minds, refuse to accept the problem and without that, we can’t solve it.

As every man reading this yells NO! Well, she isn’t sure what to say then. Honey, I”ve been faking it for
the last four years isn’t real easy to spit out and it isn’t any easier for you men to handle! The reaction
to THAT statement will be a lot of recriminations and self doubt and storming about and anger! Sex is very
very difficult to discuss for people.

Faking it is lying and we do it, because if we don’t you won’t let up on us, and somewhere in there, we all
have to get some sleep. Sex is giving too, and we love the intimacy and the giving and it does give us
pleasure to do that for you and for ourselves. We like the touching and the sense of fun, we don’t really
mind that we don’t have an orgasm and we don’t want to lose what we have already or upset you fellas. Hell
guys we even try to laugh at the towel trick thing you think is so cute! (That is so dumb fellas, it really
is pretty damned corny!)

We women and you men are besieged with these images we are supposed to compare ourselves to and live up to,
and if it were that easy, none of those images would have any value. We see slinky black dresses on
perfectly coiffed blondes with sultry lips languishing lazily on billboards, we see Madonna dressed in her
undies on stage, we see Brittney gyrating hips suggestively while the crowds go wild with desire, and
we listen to men, you smile when you see a tight young butt on a bicycle and claim you’d follow that across
America, you tell us you like see through and grin like fools when we put it on, but it doesn’t DO the
same thing for us, that it does FOR YOU. We do it to please you and hope somewhere in there, the magic will
just come down from the heavens and hit that button called hot, and warm us right the hell up and curl our
hair and our toes and cross our ever loving eyes and make us purr for hours after. Guys you make US cum
well enough and we will do anything for you! So there is a flip side to this coin about the stuff I write.
The man who makes us scream for hours in ecstasy we will do anything for you, and any woman who denies
that, hasn’t screamed for hours yet. OH and the kids? What kids? I sent them out to the neighbors, get your
butt in this bedroom DAD. NOW. Do that AGAIN. Think I’m kidding? HA! Try it and find out!

Men know what they find sexy. They find full pouty lips sexy, they find fiery temperaments sexy, they
find willowy and sweet sexy, they find lots of attitude sexy, they find innocent eyes looking up at
them with adoration and trust sexy, they find sultry sexy, they find smokey eyes sexy, they find a
confident strut sexy, a bold stare sexy, they find eye contact held a bit long sexy, they find naked women
and almost naked women and women in baseball caps and women in shirts and women in jeans sexy, and in
actuality, men find milk sexy. On the right day! Men can get in the mood over a $1.95 Burger! Women however
can’t. Men are far more readily visually stimulated into sexual arousal than women are. Women don’t even
know what arouses them at times, it’s often the thought of intimacy, of knowledge and sharing and
meeting of the minds and souls as well as bodies. As such, both have their strengths and reasons to exist.

We women are so repressed, we barely STILL see naked male bodies as attractive, and even in the media that
so invades our daily existence, men are rarely seen COMPLETELY naked, they are seen partially and rear
view naked, or? When we see full frontal male nudity, it’s often in a spoof or comedy, and half the guys we
see, in magazines and ads, really aren’t that sexy to us. We like MEN, not shaved boys with fake tans, a
plastic smile and four pounds of hairspray? We love Mel Gibson, and Sean Connery and manly men, with hair
and craggy faces and passionate eyes and an intelligent playful toughness and a soft side they
often hide but show us so occasionally on the screen. We like the bravery and chivalry in one, we like how
gallant a man can be. We react to these things even more than the physical appearance.
We grew up with Clint Eastwood and John Wayne and men who were strong and kind, ethical and moral and
somewhat arrogant and stood tall above the others. They protected us, and secretly saw beneath our outer
coverings to the women we all are within. We like polish and insolence, we like tight jeans and curved
firm butts, we like bad boys in leather jackets with brooding sultry mouths, we like the soulfulness of the
rock star and the sensitivity of the artist in all of you, we like the contrasts men offer us, the tough and
the tender, the rough and the smooth, the wild and the tame, we like how men ARE as much as how they look. We
aren’t men. What we do is wish we had one who was all
man for us. We like the contrasts to our feminity and
we like the sense of masculinity that has all but gone
out of style. We like men who puff up at us and act
strong, we like that they give in to us, and love us
enough to change or agree, we love being your
princesses and your goddesses and we love being on
your pedestals, but we also need to be the LovePeddler and
the fantasy and the woman you crave carnally. We are
attracted to things that are male, but more with all
our senses, not just the visual. We are more sensually
attuned to males then they often are to us. And men
like things like how we look and smell, and it often
takes time before they can sense more than just visual
attraction as a stimulation for them.

Male bodies are a bit shocking to us, and we’re not
even sure why you all like women’s bodies! Our
repression runs very deep gentlemen. And you then show
us a picture of some perfect lithe teenage model and
say wow, this one’s nice and we run and hide in the
closet all but in tears, knowing we can’t compete! It
may get you hot, but all it does is upset us, that you
don’t and never will want us, because we don’t look
like her. And we don’t always realize that all you
were doing was hinting that you do have school girl
fantasies about cheerleaders and pompoms and you just
wish us to play that role for you at times.

You men love your joysticks, even as you suspect we
don’t, and in some ways we really aren’t sure what to
do about those, we aren’t. You play with them and even
as little boys you’re fascinated, but they’re out
there for you to play with! Our pleasurable and sexual
parts are hidden away and when WE put our hands in our
panties, we get our hands slapped and severely scolded
and told that’s BAD and DIRTY! Yours were much more
convenient to play with for you and we were very
sensitive to not just the actions of being corrected,
but the attitude that to like those feelings or touch
those body parts was a bad thing. Besides, guys are
somewhat allowed to play with theirs, women are told
not to! So when we first see, the one eyed monster,
the snake, the tube steak, your little brain, willy,
peter, dick, your mighty cock, your best friend, your
love muscle, your submarine, or your towel rack, we’re
not quite sure what to make of it. Often fellas the
first time we see one, is when one of you “whips it
out” so to speak. And we do stare in amazement, we do,
as in wow, so THAT’s what that is, huh…amazing!

To us it looks pretty damned big, whether our hands
are small or not, and you’re going to do what with it?
Put it where, and while you worry it isn’t big enough,
we are sort of going THAT IS not GOING TO FIT, OH MY
HEAVENS YOU ARE NOT! Don’t you pee with that thing?
That’s a little much to swallow, and you want us to do
what? Taste it? Kiss it and make it spit? Oh my! And
this is what love is? It comes as quite a shock to
most women guys, it really does. And we may swallow
hard a few times before we ever learn to swallow. And
then when you treat us, like ours is a bit strange and
nasty, and sort of eye it with a combination of
distaste and distrust, we really aren’t sure we even
want to do this stuff, do you blame us? So if you drop
your drawers and some woman sort of goes, want to play
Monopoly tonight, this is why? We aren’t used to
things sexual, or male sexuality and you have to allow
us to get used to them

Being a girl is a little tough! We’re supposed to be
nice and sweet and pure and innocent and clean and
pleasant, and unlike boys, we haven’t talked about
bumping uglies and doing the deed and getting down and
dirty and funky, we talk about shopping and how you
behave instead, but then you want us to get down and
raunchy with something we’re not sure we even like or
may never have seen before, and you name it all these
strange things like it is alive, and may do heavens
knows what too?

Guys show each other, they strut about nude, they take
showers in gym, they laugh about each others equipment
and packages, and in all, they’ve had a bit of time to
get used to having a penis, so please gentlemen, give
us a few minutes to make friends with yours. We do
need to contemplate this thing you have hanging out
there, just like you once did, and being female means
we like to take time to consider it all, but once we
figure out it is a source of great enjoyment for US
TOO! We’ll like it as much as you do. I promise. Penis
envy may not be the result, but penis love and
adoration may. Now if this is a bit shocking to you
men, and if it is hard for you to accept or if you are
frowning going, no this is 2003! Women have seen
joysticks, women don’t think this stuff! And what’s all
this crap about they aren’t even sure they like our
bodies, this woman has no clue! Well, that’s why we
can’t tell you this stuff. Because how you react to it
isn’t comforting to us, and we just want some
understanding and comfort that’s all, and oh yea this
is so what we think!

And we want to appeal to you men! Women all have some
urge however subliminal to appeal to males, in some
way or another, we do want your attention on us. Even
subliminally, sexual attraction is so strong and so
powerful that, we still feel it for you, repressed or
not, whether we’ve gotten used to your maleness or
your bodies or your minds, we still want you, and we
want you to not only WANT us we want you to figure it
out for BOTH of us, because dumbie, you’re the damned
man! You lead we follow, this is like dancing and
that’s the rules, someone has to lead, and we aren’t
sure how to even! And in all those fairy tales, you
lead us to the promised land, and you are our
salvation and our pleasure guide, and after we submit
to you, we give you our souls and our hearts and our
bodies and our minds, so if you want all that, you
have to do some work first. And if the answer is I
just wanted to get laid, well, fine, we’ll just lay
here, and you do what ever it is that feels good to
you, like a bad Victorian novel, but you can’t have
our sexuality with out doing the work! It just doesn’t
happen and we can’t help it! And we’d really rather
you did know this, cause great sex is damned FUN!

We do want your attention and your interest, and we
want to be sexy! We want you to think WE are
attractive, and the ages old dance of the sexes is
about attraction and chemistry and sexual attuning,
and even if we don’t understand all of it, some has
gotten through to us very loudly and clearly. Men like
sex, sexy women have more fun. We all know you like
sexy and we all want to be sexy for you to enjoy and
like and we want to appeal to you, even if just so
you’ll open jars for us! So we put on our sexy
clothes, and we put on our make up and our high heels
and we strut our stuff, and try not to trip and we
wear those RIDICULOUSLY UNCOMFORTABLE garter belts
(thank the heavens for thigh highs! Amen!) we take off
our clothes, we put on short skirts, we do what ever
it is we think we’re supposed to do to be sexy and
please you guys. But it doesn’t work! We don’t feel
sexy, we don’t reach our own sexuality by putting on
clothes or make up, and when they say that sexy is a
thought and a sense of excitement, it really is, and
outfits are only skin deep sexy if we do feel even
that, and until we can reach inside ourselves to where
that sexuality lies dormant, it may turn you GUYS on
but it doesn’t do much for us. And in the end we are
at least as disappointed as anyone and we have no clue
how to fix it ourselves. We wanted the white horse
guys! We want to fly in the arms of the angel, we want
to feel bliss. We wanted to feel and enjoy and be? And
it didn’t happen, and we aren’t sure why, or what to
do and so we often just go to sleep, figuratively,
like Rip Van Winklemisses…and smile at you benignly
with out passion and only say Not tonight dear, ok?
I’m tired tonight, honey. Saturday night, ok? I have a
headache. Good night, smooch! Love ya dear, and turn
over like the dormant creatures we’ve become and go
right to sleep. We don’t even know what we’re missing
and subliminally that is a bit of what we say to you
at a time like that, you don’t know what you’re
missing either. Sleep time, and all us good little
peoples are sound asleep in here, you might as well
nod off too.

So if you want to know why you aren’t getting any,
listen up and pay attention, cause you can fix this,
and we so WISH you would! But we’ll never ever tell
you that. We’ll tell you your dick is too small before
we’ll ever admit we don’t enjoy it like we think we
should. And hell yes we blame you, for one, you also
blame yourselves, you do, any man out there will
immediately say, well I’m a good lover! My woman loves
what I do in bed, for another the books and songs do,
from I want a man with a slow touch to That don’t
impress me much, that won’t keep me warm at night,
everything tells you hints of what we need, it does,
and you guys do try to figure it out, I know you
do…but you don’t understand the size and depth of the
problem and it is not simple to deal with, or there
wouldn’t be a problem! Gentlemen if you want us to be
sexual and open to you, then show us the way, and for
a third reason, we’re conditioned to believe you are
supposed to handle this for us, from romantic movies
to fairy tales, the man is in charge, he rides a white
horse, he carries her off in his arms to make her his
own, we grew up on that stuff fellas, we want the full
meal deal, we do, and you can skip the white horse, if
you make us scream for twenty minutes in pleasure, in
fact if you make US cum well enough, we’ll do ANYTHING
you WANT! and it does say men are supposed to know
this stuff, so we agree, and in reality we aren’t sure
whose at fault and we are really hoping it is you,
because if it isn’t, it’s us. We don’t know how to
solve this by ourselves, and we don’t want to be a
FRIGID woman or asexual or sexually dysfunctional or
have no libido or any of that, any more than a guy
wants to think his dick isn’t big enough. And without
your help we can’t get there fellas, so…pay attention.
We don’t know how to! You have to figure it out and
show us, and here is how, if you really want to know.
Take a deep breath, be strong, and here goes, we
aren’t past the worst of this yet, if you wish to be
enlightened, you may find the door to the realm of her
sexuality and passions. Just like Raoul showed me
where it was, and he was so right, as he always is!
Well, maybe not QUITE always. But mostly. More often
than I am anyway. Even he admits he isn’t perfect, ALL
the time…and I”ll tell you he is most of the time.

It is somewhat simple. Inside us all is a little girl.
And that little girl does not become a woman until the
man she chooses to be her prince, kisses her awake.
Yes it is romantic, and it’s a bit oversimplified but
it’s also the truth. To many of us, as we’ve learned
to look at sex clinically and objectively we’ve
forgotten the absolute magic of it, and we’ve
discounted that magic and we’ve lost respect for it,
and so therefore it has eluded many of us, because we
don’t even know that without that magic, there is
nothing special about sexuality, it is just a
biological function. And females do not have to orgasm
to have sex or to enjoy it. They do have to have the
magic to feel that sense of pleasure, and that is the
truth fellas. Women guard the magic in the world, we
have that thing called intuition and with it we can
see into a man’s soul. We need that magic to make his
life joyful, it is as simple as that. And yes I will
get more specific, before you all start dousing people
with fairy dust.

We women learned from stories and reading, fairy tales
and church, we learned from other women who knew as
little as we did, women don’t know enough to teach
each other about sexuality, we whisper and
misinterpret and we aren’t sure, so a lot of what we
hear isn’t very accurate. We can talk about SEX, we
can discuss our bodies, we spend hours talking about
monthly cycles and our hormones, but when it comes to
things like ORGASMS or pleasure, or fantasies, we
don’t talk much, to anyone at all. Not to each other,
not even to ourselves and DEFINITELY not to you men.
We’ll smile and agree on that subject, oh boy howdy,
we aren’t gonna fess up to nuthin’ honey! Who ever
believes women can’t keep a secret, is foolish. We
have kept the secret of our own sexuality so
completely, and so long and so well, we have lost
track of it ourselves, and have no clue it’s inside us
all. And men don’t know, unless they are told any more
than we women do. And because of this, the key to the
realm was hidden and lost, and we aren’t even sure
where it is, or how to use it. And all men secretly
long to have a holy grail to seek and find, well
here’s the grail guys! And even Indiana Jones had
sense enough to realize it is a gift in itself, more
precious than diamond and gold, and simple in
construction. And to sup from the cup of sensual
pleasure is the salvation we all seek and our reward
on earth that makes us believe we are in heaven, amen.


Only men will try to figure it out, and only because
at the light of that tunnel is sex. Lots of very hot,
erotic, exciting sex. And men will do ANYTHING for
that. And perhaps nature did have a good plan after
all, for men seek and hunt and think and we women wait
and nurture and share, and together we become more
than either is alone and better than either can ever
be by themselves. It is the holy grail a male seeks
and his instincts will send him on the quest for
sexual fulfillment and erotic stimulation far more
intently than we timid females would ever try to
achieve it, we just sort of shrug it off and get a
vibrator IF we even do that! So you men are therefore
the ones who will happily do the work needed to in
fact find the on button for the woman in their lives,
for the benefits they will receive, for the joy it
will bring, like the gift it is to us all. Gentlemen,
if you do this correctly, you will benefit from it, as
will we. You will earn the undying gratitude of the
woman you do this for. You will enjoy her and she you.
And the faking of orgasms will indeed become a dying
art.

Women need to be understood and loved and they need to
feel safe and relaxed before they can unleash their
own sexual beings. This does not mean they have to BE
in love, it does mean they have to feel cherished and
special. To get her to be the slut she can be, you
have to remember, she wants to be a monogamous slut,
one man’s slut, not just a common slut. You must prove
to her she is a lady you both care about and respect
and she has to trust you to allow her to be not only
who she is, but can be and that you not only want
this, but need it and will love her even more for it.
You have to teach her it is ok to be passionate and
sexual with you. You not only have to teach her to
respect and love your body but her own.

Once, the prescribed theories were, no sex prior to
marriage, no sex outside of marriage, and no casual
sex period, and when we did away with those traditions
in the spirit of moral freedoms or to some it’s
defined as moral decay, and lost those customs, we
lost something very important. In that were safety
limits, boundaries we could trust and lean on, and
knowledge that we weren’t going to end up cast away or
misused for just loving you as men. And no, I’m not
even espousing that people return to a very rigid
tradition and repressed societal interference with our
own pleasures, I am not. If marriage was all it took
to solve the problems between men and women, you men
would drag us to the damned alters in droves! But in
between the old way and the new, should be a solution,
that sexuality can exist without morality restricting
it into oblivion through narrow minded prejudices and
archaic notions about moral purity meaning the
banishment and denial of sexuality and pleasure.

What I am saying is that there was some sense to those
traditions, that they were in fact once, based on good
theories for human beings, that they gave us good
structure and balance and that knowing the rules and
knowing people play by them brings safety and sanity
to a powerful set of feelings. The magic and respect
that human sexual exchanges deserve have been
forgotten, ignored and way laid for a very long time,
and we pay the price by having meaningless sex, and
sexually dysfunctional people everywhere, who really
aren’t sure what it’s about, is it pornographic,
immoral, or just intensely unusual to have passionate
sex with a few creative elements? Or is THAT the norm
rather than the prescribed theory that we’ll all get
fat at 40 and quit doing that silly stuff, cause we
love each other too much to need it anymore? Sex
should not be ruled by Middle America, and it should
not be dictated to us by churches, who really compete
with sex for Sunday morning attendance. And to that I
will add, never learn about sex from someone who
doesn’t at least like it! Is this such a difficult
thing to understand? You don’t ask your minister how
to fix your car either! Unless he’s also a mechanic,
that is!

Sex is special and as such, should be treated with
respect and our sexuality should be treated with
dignity and reverence for the beauty and joy it truly
is and should be. It should be revered as being the
magic it is. It’s the glue that binds two wildly
different sexes together into one, and makes them
better together than apart. It is more important than
the chores or work or any distraction, and what it is
is communication of souls and spirits and hearts, it’s
primal and basic and animalistic, but it’s also a gift
we were given in our creation. It is communing with
each others bodies, and it is supposed to be very
exciting and very pleasurable. It should definitely
rank ABOVE watching television, EVEN football,
gentlemen!

And whether your beliefs include marital vows or
religious benedictions prior to this union of two
people isn’t the point. The point is, it should be
meaningful and special and between two people who at
least like and respect each other! Sex is more than
just a biological function, and the tradition that men
will and still do say whatever they have to get it
FROM women, is part of why women are taught to repress
their own sexuality, so they don’t fall for every line
from every guy who hands them one!

Sex deserves respect, and understanding and education
and effort, and a lot of us put more effort into
learning about which car we wish to buy prior to
purchasing it! And every male who uses and discards
women like they’re condoms, and treats them with
disrespect and a virtual receptacle for their own self
involved pleasure and convenience and believes they
have no value and are unworthy of respect contributes
to this problem over all. If you treat women like they
are stupid for liking sex, giving affection or
trusting what you say, well, you can hardly blame them
for not wanting to be that sort of person. And when
one does it to a few, we all hear and we all see how
he treats and humiliates her for giving him SEX. And
oh yeah we notice! And gentlemen women have long
memories and we take notes. SO, it has to be reversed,
for women, before they can instantly hit an on switch,
as much as we wish we could? We can’t hit that easily
or quickly ourselves. And no, we’ll never admit that?
That’s part of the problem, because we also believe
sex is totally natural and comes to us naturally, and
if we aren’t sexual and passionate, we either have a
lower libido, or there is something innately wrong
with us, for not being “normal” so we swear we’re fine
with it, and we all but convince ourselves we are! And
this is a very widespread problem and a lot of women
‘fake” orgasms rather than EVER admit they don’t have
one! And that is so common, I don’t know a woman that
hasn’t faked at least some. We even mischievously work
harder at being good at faking those, then we do, at
learning how not to need to! And that is feminine
logic definitively if I’ve ever known it! Makes sense
to us guys! And no, most of us haven’t even a clue
why!

Women need to be told and shown it is ok, to be a
sexual creature. Too many years of disrespect for
sexual women, too many men who dis the “easy” girl at
school, too many people saying, oh don’t get a
reputation! Have taken their toll.

Society has labeled sexually active women as tramps,
losers, whores, sluts, bitches, fallen angels, will
die in abject poverty from disease and pestilence, are
cheap trashy and live in trailer courts, and in
essence, who in the hell would want to be one of those
willingly! Society shakes it heads sadly when women
fall from grace, and sighs, what man will want her
now, she likes sex! And gentlemen you are as guilty of
these misconceptions and double standards as anyone
and partially why we’re so confused. Do you want sex
or not, is sort of what we end up wondering.

Men don’t MARRY sexual women, because they want a good
mother for their kids! They marry the woman who isn’t
sexual, who is prim and proper and soft spoken and
then ten years later sort of wonder why she stopped
putting out. She’s a nice girl is why, you chose the
most repressed one you could find is why, so you could
raise nice repressed daughters of your own. Guys, if
you want a lady in the living room, and LovePeddler in the
bedroom, you may need to teach the one to be both. And
although you all seem to think it’s easy to teach that
chilled and virtuous woman to be fiery and passionate,
in fact, some people never do embrace passion
willingly and won’t learn to be sexual. It is easier
to teach one manners and how to dress properly, by the
way. Part of that is most of them will gladly make
that change for you. And some of the ones who appear
so sweet and pure, in fact, may never be able to be
sexual at all, and may not even like men very much.

Our society does this to women, and we all do our part
to make those rigid restrictions a very real problem.
Women aren’t allowed to talk dirty, it’s very
unladylike to swear or to talk about sex, or like sex,
is it really any wonder women repress their own
sexuality? And part of this whole women’s movement has
been about sexual freedom from repression, we want to
like sex and have it in our lives. Other cultures like
it, and value it and even teach it to people without
worrying they’ll misuse sexuality or abuse it. It’s
ours that is very adamant that sexuality is a disease
and an evil, and as such, I guess I wonder who made
those rules and decisions for all of us, and why, if
this is evil, were we all born to be able to have this
pleasure.

Whether its Puritannism, Victorian, or whereever it
all started, somewhere along the line, people didn’t
want women to be sexual, perhaps they were afraid we’d
be TOO sexual and they would run off and screw our
tiny little brains out! And no man wants to share a
woman he cares about! And before the age of birth
control and antibiotics it was a way to insure your
child was indeed your own and that you didn’t get
incurable disease, which STD’s once were. Male
possessiveness is as primal as anything we deal with.
Men guard their pussies, because if they don’t, some
other man will steal her away, and men like having
their own pussy! She makes his life BETTER, she greets
him at the entrance to cave with a cool drink, she
puts curtains on his windows, she tans his hides into
new clothes for him, she keeps him warm at night and
she brightens his life with a smile, she makes him
laugh as she figures things out, and she amazes him by
what and how she learns. And in that, selfish and
somewhat overbearing protective rationalization, that
women were in fact possessions, women were put to
sleep, very much like Snow White was, so that when her
Prince arrived, he could awaken her with a kiss and
she would only want him ever more, having been guarded
well and still chaste and pure, the spring from which
only he gets to drink, sweet and gentle, clean and
good.

The tale of the seven short guys and the Monogamous
slut, was so cleaned up to get that G rating, some of
us missed that they do a lot more than kiss, after he
carries her off to his castle. And if the tale were
remade in an X rated version, he darn near drags her
to that castle impatient to ravish her completely and
mark her as his own for eternity, branding her as his,
plunging into her ravenous mind and eager body until
she’s nothing but responses and nerve endings. Lucky
girl! So is there an airline that flies to this land,
because I would book a trip. Really I would.

There are two approaches to reaching a female’s sexual
release triggers, to find her repressed sexuality, and
unleash it. One is through tenderness and patience,
gentleness and knowledgeable touching. It’s
encouragement for her to be sexual, it’s teasing and
teasing and more teasing and oh even more teasing,
it’s making her beg for it and then saying, not
tonight honey, let’s just cuddle. Men, she is showing
you what she needs the only way she knows how. TEASE
the living daylights out of her, until your eyes cross
and your testicles turn NAVY BLUE, she needs your self
denial more than you can ever imagine to get through
this, and it is worth it for you both, it really is.
And oh start up again tomorrow, do not let her have
it! Do not. And when you come home to this soft
glowing pleasing sweet enticing begging woman, who all
but leaps upon you for more, when the glow reaches her
skin, her eyes, and her hair, tease her a few hours
more and tenderly take her, and yes, it may take
several weeks. At least three or four nights. Well you
guys did ask, and this is the answer. This is what
women want desperately and have no clue how to tell
you because, you’ll get the same look on your face and
frown you have from reading this now. It’s that dumb
way you all go HUH, no way?! That makes it hard to
tell you these things. Seriously. Patience and belief
are important.

Once there was a courtship ritual, that was very much
standardized through out time. It involved getting to
know each other, it was often chaperoned by others, so
that no sex could take place! It was once called
dating in this country, although we’ve all but done
away with it, sadly. It’s a dance, it swerves, it’s
rhymical, it advances it retreats, it’s step here,
step there, follow now turn, dip and spin, and in it
men lead. And that is the key to unlocking women’s
sexual responsiveness and passion. Those old courtship
rituals, weren’t about bringing her flowers, they were
about learning her mind, showing her you care, earning
her trust and teasing her into awakening,
figuratively, literally and metaphorically. There are
reasons those customs evolved, because older wiser
people knew that women could not just jump into the
rack and be happy happy joy joy with it all.

And the recipe for sexual pre-intimacy and the ability to
awaken a woman’s sexuality is in the above. It is a
dance, it does go on for some time, it does involve
things like learning to trust and building that trust
and it is about proving to her who you are and why she
does want to love you.

And she will adore you forever, and for a time, you
will need to tease her like this ongoingly, but it
won’t be long before she begins to develop the early
stages of that disease you men all wish she’d get of
I-wanna-cock-now. It wont. Sex is a journey, and it
starts slow for women. After awhile, they start to go
faster, and they’ll keep up. After more time, they’ll
all but drag you along, and eventually, if all else
fails, she’ll carry you if she has to, but you have to
do the first part! Or it doesn’t happen!

She can’t help it gentlemen, and very very expensive
sexual dysfunction clinics do this, and teach this
“delaying” technique to bring out a woman or a man’s
mental blocks or repressions preventing their
enjoyment and active participation in sexual
pleasures. You can do this yourselves at home. In some
ways this works like building pressure behind the
figurative dam, that any repression literally hides
behind and that pressure, through arousal and physical
excitement, builds to the point where it has to be
released, where it breaks free and all but explodes
very much like a dam that’s burst. And the older she
is, and the longer that repressive dam has built up,
the more it will take, and part of her will not be
able to help you do this, the part that built that dam
to begin with. The part of her, that through teaching
of parents and societal influences, believes pleasure
is wrong, that sex really isn’t important nor should
it matter. It can be overcome, but it isn’t something
fifteen minutes of pre-intimacy or touching the right spot
is going to accomplish. You have to enter her body
through her mind, and help her unlock the door to her
sexual responses gently, with compassion and with
understanding and the belief that oh yes you can, and
oh yes she wants you too. She just may not be able to
admit that. With knowledge, skill, understanding and
trust, lots of erogenous zone play, and teasing
delaying the gratification to the point she can’t
control her own mind, a little manual stimulation and
she will go off like a rocket into space, and once
she’s learned how and what it’s like, she’ll get right
with the program, honest. I am one. I know. And with
more experimentation you can expand on this and build
a truly pleasurable intimate life long adventure with
your woman.

This will be continued in the next chapter-and I am
not a trained or degreed professional of any sort in
the arts and sciences of humanity, nor do I profess to
be such. Some of my instructions may be somewhat
flawed or incomplete, nor espoused as popular belief.
I read a lot, I learned and then Raoul showed me the
way, like it was simple! So good luck to all of you
who have read this far with interest, and the next
chapter will go into more on this subject

vivaladiva if you dont love yourself how can you love
men/brother/father/uncle etc. Think about it. What i am saying
is men do alot of things that we women feel it is our right to
collect those things. Of my boyfriend can cheat on men but he
loves me and if he does i will forgive him

Sistawoman you always sound wise, i agree with you completely
Bukky should not try to tell him who he makes friends with. What
i think Bukky can do if she really loves Tunde, she should be friends
with Tope and learn more about Tunde from Tope. Like the saying
gone "Keep your friends close and your enemies ever closer."

Bless you sistawoman for that, it is women like us men cheat on their
girlfriends with because we know their value not by words but action.
Persona82 thanks for that people should read positive things more than
negative things. My boyfriend is a lovely guy and i have sex with him all
the time. Things i do for him you cant imagine because he also does much
more for me. LADIES LOVE YOU MEN AND SHOW THEM BY TAKE INTEREST
IN THEIR LIVES. If he likes sports watch it with him even if you dont understand
he will explain it to you. Ladies stop nagging. If i want my boyfriend to do
something for me i tell him "If you forget to take the trash out (Stand there
completely naked) i maybe a little to tired to sleep with you this night" and
the trash is gone. He dont forget again. Thanks for the comments

Yes i expect you to read it ok. I did and it was hard but
i finished it and gained something you should too

Gabrywyl i agree with your last statement it is
all about communication and some people are
just bad ok it has nothing to do with men cheating

Uju you sound very bitter and please i dont mean to attack
my fellow girl but you should see it from a guy's point of
view which i try to do with my boyfriend who i love dearly
but cant him sometimes. You sound like a kind of girl that
dated my boyfriend years ago that taught him a leason to
speak his mind and talk well. Anyway all i can say is that
the guy was tryin to say what happens from his very. If not
clear read my own post

Hi guys and ladies i need more comments on this

Hi Gabrywyl you have a point there but your Guy B case if we girls gives
our guys the kind of sex they want and at that frequency that they want
Guy B will not exist. If we give our guys space to live their lives independent
of ours like they were doing when we werent with them Guy C will not exist.
If a girl wants to be a virgin when she get married greeeezzz, well the was
a case of a lady gettin marriage as a virgin but her problem was her husband
was also a virgin so at their wedding night the lady kept on running around in
their hotel room. Her husband final rape her that night. So think to all you ladies
that want to get married as a virgin who will your future husbands learn how
to have sex with, their dogs or women like you and me. So in this way Guy D will
not exist. As for Guy A well just will us women who date men because of money
some guys also date women for money.

Bethsy i like your idea thankyou for that

Well alot of ladies like myself will like to marry a man of our dreams,
i think the cinderrilla story is the most common. Anyway we ladies need
to know men first, i mean really know men well not from the surface like
most of us do but what is in deep. I am not talkin about sleepin with
every guy out there. The best way i think is to study a 5yr old boy very
closely what he does and what makes him who he is. And u go also study
a 5yr old little girl and u will learn alot about women that is my way what do u think?

Cheaters. It’s a nasty word, it bespeaks of betrayal of trust, of sneakery and thievery, of dishonesty in the core of a being, they not only steal from others, they do it secretly and through being devious and deceptive, they worm their ways into the hearts of a lover only to then twist like a knife to hurt them thoughtlessly for superficial selfishness. It tells of a naughty thing bad people do, it’s a label that says evil, that says unworthy, even unethical and unkind. But WHY do they do it?

You’ll read theories by angry spouses that explain it’s because they’re cheating, low life, lying, no good, lousy, stinking, shallow and flawed, and insecure, and mean, and totally unsuitable to be allowed in the human race spouse is just a dog, a slug, a slime and an ingrate. They’ll tell you of the damage it did to their own trust (oh poor babies!) what a surprise it was to them and how these horrible thoughtless destroyers of beauty and good are in fact cads, and witches and evil beyond measure. It’ll talk about their upbringing, their parents, their friends and their work, and slyly suggest none of it was even THEIR fault or had anything to do with them. It paints them like victims, and what it doesn’t tell you is the truth. Or, I guess my question is, if it is the truth, then why’d you marry them to begin with? Did you expect them to change from being shallow, flawed, insecure, inadequate and mean and totally unsuitable, or did they fool you totally with nary a hint or a suggestion? If you did marry them knowing they had many problems and flaws, did you not realize the risk that they in fact might not be perfect or conform to your standards of excellence? Cause I’d think it might be smart to know someone a bit before marrying them, but what do I know…and of course, my goal isn’t just to get their paycheck and not have to work…so? Different strokes I guess…but the free lunch doesn’t happen often in life, so you get what you deserve at times. If you set forth choosing to be blind without seeing, don’t complain about the view.

Rule number one, cheaters cheat to get something they aren’t getting. Period. End report. Now what it is may vary, and indeed they may have some flaws, but no happy person goes looking for trouble just to see if it exists. This is almost a constant, except in the case of a psychopath, who then cheats just for the joy of so doing. For one, it’s a lot of work to cheat. You have to find someone else who wants to cheat with you, and even single men can tell you that’s not always easy! A lot of the girls out there won’t have a man who cheats, and actually are wise enough to ask if they’re married, and will not play with men who they even SUSPECT are! And for another, a person who is getting all they need, really doesn’t bother looking for something they don’t. No motive, no action!

People cheat to find fulfillment, and what that fulfillment is, varies by what it is they don’t have or don’t want to give up. They do it often as a form of compromise. A way to stay within that marriage or relationship, to raise those children, to honor their commitments and have the life they have invested in, and still have “me” time, and things they so desperately need, and don’t get elsewhere. It’s an oasis of me, in a sea of them, to many. It’s like going bowling, it’s like going fishing, it’s a hobby, a distraction and even a relief from the daily grind. To many it has very little emotional attachment, it is just physical, one dimensional and a solution to cope with a life they can’t seem to get everything from. It is often egocentric, in a world they are allowed no ego in. And sometimes it’s addictive as well, because it is naughty and it is totally egocentric. And there’s a high to that. It becomes a conquest and a getting over on someone that in time, can in fact flaw the individual who may have started for different reasons altogether.

No I don’t agree with it, nor is it a healthy way to live one’s life, but to solve it, you have to identify why they do it! And they aren’t all wrong! They aren’t! I will defend some of them. It is a case of situational ethics, of solutions to problems and compromise. So if you don’t want them to cheat, I”d suggest you consider not putting them in that situation, or if you don’t care if they do, well then quit WHINING!

Example: The man who marries the woman who just doesn’t want sex with him. He works, he pays the bills, he mows the lawn, he provides for her. He gives her a roof over her head, he may raise her children, he escorts her places, he takes her on vacation, he builds her a secure future and keeps her from a life of hardship. He buys her gifts, brings her champagne, he plans romantic escapes, he pleases her anyway he can, he takes her to dinner and the movies. All he wants is love and affection and warmth and intimacy in return.

OR…the woman whose man ignores her, comes home, never talks, never listens, goes to his shop, won’t interact, won’t do things with her, often won’t have sex with her, and often acts more like a vegetable with legs than a man or a lover, and all she wants is his love, affection and warmth and intimacy.

So when she or he refuses to give him or her that, says she/he doesn’t like it, or it’s not convenient, who’s doing the cheating? And after months and years of this, he swallows hard and accepts that she isn’t going to give him that one little thing he so desperately needs, he sometimes decides, he loves her so much or the life they’ve built, that he’ll just solve it all but getting a little on the side. Or she will, cause it does happen the other way around too!

And I again ask you, whose the cheater in that. The man who earned, did, worked for, provided and got nothing in return, not even the consideration to want to meet him part way, or…the man who after providing all these things, and thinking of everything he possibly could to get this housekeeper gone mad to put out a little and like being with him intimately, he decides he won’t bother her for THAT any more and just get it somewhere else?

Is there anger in it? Of course there is! Lol…poor GUY! He had this vision of happily ever after when he walked down that aisle, with visions of sugar plums dancing in his head, he worked and he slaved, and he gave and he gave, and now he’s off begging some woman to please be his friend, because the one at home, has a headache, oh yet again. And according to the stories, HE’s the BAD GUY in it all for liking and needing sex, love and affection and intimacy! OH RIGHT!

There are different libido levels, and unfortunately sometimes they do end up in a relationship, but the bottom line is there are also lazy, thoughtless, inconsiderate uncaring, unfeeling, self involved people in marriages, and THEIR SPOUSES often CHEAT! And they then go boo hoo hoo! Because they couldn’t manipulate the last sense of spirit and passion out of that spouse.

There are also sexual preferences and inadequacies, which often get the press for these problems. The she left me cause my dick wasn’t big enough thing, or she left me for a woman, or he left me for a younger woman. Well? A dick that never wants them is about worthless regardless of it’s size, if they are indeed a latent homosexual, well somewhere in there, you were either deceived badly or refused to see, and if he left you for someone younger, it’s probably because she looks at him like a god, and idolizes him and actually takes care of her body, and goes places with him and laughs, so? It isn’t just an age thing or a size thing, it’s about not being what they need or caring enough to figure out what they need. If you have decided to turn into an old woman and he’s bored half to death, you’re right, he may decide he wants some one more alive and fun, and while he’s shopping maybe firm and luscious might as well go into it too, besides, if she’s younger, by the time she turns old and grey like you are now, well, he’ll be ready for one a bit slower by then…right fellas?

Hey, folks, you’re the ones boring them out the door, don’t mind me if I at least explain to you what you’re doing! They want fun, so do I! There’s nothing wrong with being alive, and you really don’t have to sit down to wait for your funeral, I promise, no one will hold it without you being there! You can’t be late to your own funeral, so go play! It’s ok! It’ll wait til you’re ready!

Is cheating right? Well compared to allowing someone to destroy your soul, it may be, but in actuality I don’t think so, I think it’s a case of two wrongs don’t make a right. Although they will defend it, as being better for the kids…I dunno! Some will even say “it’s not the money” OH PULLLEASE, it is SO! Lol! They don’t want to give up the big screen! It’s all of it…the house, the frying pan, the 401k, the kids, the dog, all of it…ok…maybe they’d give up the frying pan willingly.

I was a child in that, I’m not so sure it’s a good thing!

I also know a man who cheated for years, and his wife had learned to just look the other way, She knew, she didn’t admit she did, he hid it somewhat discreetly and they managed. But he said he wouldn’t leave her, because she would get half of everything, which? I guess, it’s what you value, your chance at happiness or half a double wide trailer, it’s all relative to what’s important to you I guess.

I know another couple, he’s in a position of power, he loves his power, and this is his second marriage. He brings his current mistress of the moment to social functions at his house, with his wife as hostess, and she swears he would NEVER cheat on her, and you’re standing there at this cocktail party with him being smug, the latest mistress (they’re a constant stream, young, over educated, stupid, sigh, whatever!) glaring at the wife, and the wife myopically serving pu-pus trying to convince everyone she hasn’t a clue! It’s all in what you like I guess…sigh…and EVERYone knows, he makes sure they do! And does he have a big one? They don’t come that big, in my book, folks…I don’t want any of him. And it is all about money, he has, they want, he trades. All it is. She won’t leave him! So she pretends she doesn’t know! She likes his credit cards! They’re BIG credit cards!

How do kids do in that? Well for one, they learn that love is nonsexual. They see this platonic relationship of some sort, perhaps with hidden issues, and they come to view that as normal. They don’t see the intimacy and affections between their parents that teach them it’s ok to develop those and respect their values. Often they are either totally ignored by the parents who are so busy focusing on their own needs ever so selfishly, or they are so totally inundated with parental affection with no healthy outlet they are all but smothered by it. So, yeah, it’s great for the kids, if you want to raise kids as screwed up as you are. And the sins of the parents shall manifest duofold in the kids…you reap what you sow. And I wish them luck at judgment day as they explain they didn’t realize.

And no, I am not softening this with kind words, it’s real! So, if it bothers someone to read this, perhaps they should open their eyes to what all of it does to their own families, wives, husbands, children and all, as they espouse they’re doing the right thing for everyone. And no I don’t just mean the person who is driven to seek comfort outside the boundaries of that relationship, I also mean the one who drives that person to that as a solution. It’s bad stuff, folks! It is not what love is supposed to do to people. So the cheater may in fact be the cheatee in many cases too.

There are other reasons cheaters cheat. There are. There is a group of people who cheat to keep a sense of themselves they refuse to give to a relationship. Fidelity is a gift we give, and some people can not bear to give it, they fear the loss of themselves in so doing, or that they’ll not have their own safety around them, so they cheat. They keep part of themselves intact and separate from a relationship. And the first group, who started cheating for reason can evolve into this group, but this group can evolve on their own too…and it is a form of addiction I think. Where the high becomes the conquest and they seek it as a form of satisfaction outside of sexual bliss.

These folks, like a former politician who made the news for months and months with some little tramp who kept the dress ever so handily, often will explain it isn’t SEX. Or it isn’t lovemaking more accurately, because to them it isn’t. It is often contained to them being recipients of pleasures, or they are somewhat non participatory during these escapades and therefore they rationalize that this isn’t the same thing as what they do with that person they care for, this is just an outlet they need. And those people are usually habitual cheaters, and they will often tell you they are long before you ever catch them. People do tell on themselves, if you listen. And Grand Jury’s listen and have microphones and TV cameras too…but it’s symptomatic of a much widely spread disease in society. One built on lack of acceptance of sex and it’s power and it’s rightful place in our lives as a joy we are given.

I am going to share a very good story someone told me the other day. The government doesn’t want people to Bleep. Because people who Bleep think, and if you don’t let people Bleep, they won’t think, because if they do think, they’ll think about fucking, so the solution is, it’s patriotic and American to Bleep. Support our country, Bleep tonight!

And if you don’t want your spouse to seek it elsewhere, then I suggest you give it up, boys and girls! And do it very damned well. It doesn’t have to get boring, it’s a creative element in and of itself. It has lots of ways to stay fresh and exciting. If you’re on this website, you’re probably very aware of some of those.

And if that spouse is cheating, it may take YOU time to earn THEIR trust and belief in YOU Again should you wish to keep your relationship intact. Many cheaters do eventually leave that relationship, often because they can’t live a dual life, and one day they choose. But of course, the spouse who didn’t cheat always claims she threw them out…yeah RIGHT!

Not til they were already half packed and headed out the door anyway. Begging to please please, just meet them half way…and they answered by yelling get out. So yeah, they threw them out, I suppose, if you want to look at it that way, but of course, first they tortured them for a few years. OH right, they skip that part, don’t they! Silly me!

I don’t agree with cheating, but I understand it. And if you force a person to do it, you’re no less guilty than they are, in fact, you’re probably more guilty. Sex is important, and so is affection, understanding, intimacy and trust. They trusted you to care about them and you didn’t, so don’t yell at them if they then learned to not care about you, or tried to anyway, and took that one element somewhere else, because you didn’t like it anyway.

And for all you cheaters out there, sigh…what you do to that third person in that isn’t fair. It isn’t. You make him or her, pay the dues your lazy thoughtless spouse won’t pay, and then in return you expect to give nothing to get that. It’s a nasty mess for people, and for those contemplating cheating with someone, or fall into that trap, I suggest you get clear of that whirlpool if you can. Cheaters don’t love, they only use. They already gave at the office is why.

For the third persons in it, hey, make him take you someplace nice, cause you aren’t getting much else out of it! Although yes, sometimes they do learn to love too. It does happen. But it’s often a mess before it does. Good luck to you.

And to those potential cheaters contemplating or considering, you may want to look at other options too. It is not a simple thing you consider. For anyone. And you become like the one who does it to you.

The prevailing sentiment among women in today's world seems to be that men are clods only interested in where they are going to get their next piece of ass, their next beer or the next 'mommy' to clean up after them.

For the woman who truly wants to understand the man in their life or possibly for the female writer who would like to get out the stereotype writing of male characters and write on common male characteristics, here you go.

The first thing that comes to mind is that women think men are shallow. I am talking about appearance here. What woman hates to see the stick figured models on television or in store window posters as you walk through the mall simply because you know that your man will probably take notice? He's looking at that poster and not at you and it makes you angry and even hurts.

To begin with, your man is not trying to hurt you. Men like beautiful things, it's the way they're wired and that cannot be changed any more than a woman's natural tendancy to notice it. Women can berate and belittle their man for looking but all you will succeed at is pushing him away.

Women usually associate the don't have's to the do have's when comparing the woman their man is looking at to themselves. Thing's such as she had bigger/smaller boobs, she is thinner, her lips are fuller her hair is longer/shorter, her legs are longer/thinner, her butt is tighter, fuller, slimmer, her teeth are whiter, this list can go on because this is how women react in this situation. Ladies, take a breath. Do you want to know what the true difference is?

Put all of that other stuff out of your mind first. This is the big secret. She's fresh. She looks healthy. Before that shoot, before modeling, before walking out of her place these women took a lot of time getting ready and it shows. These women go through a cleaning ritual that shows through all of the makeup. They then apply their makeup for their look. Some heavy and trashy, some modest and elegant and so on. It's the look that works for them.

Put some time into yourself. Don't try to look like one of the many countless beauties that your man sees. Reinvent yourself. Find hair and makeup that accentuates your individual design. Buy new clothes that are appropriate for your age and the look you want. I know, it is easier said than done, but do some research, talk to the ladies at the cosmetics counter, talk to the sales people on the floor. You will be surprised how much you can learn here.

The one thing that is common to Pamela Anderson, Britney Spears, Lindsay Lohan, Christy Brinkley, Jennifer Lopez or IndecentStar Sophie Sweet, they all look smooth and clean, they look healthy and guess what? Guys like to look at them.

Have you ever seen these women nude or in tight clothes? Yes! They don't have cookie cutter bodies. Jennifer Lopez has small breasts and a huge butt as well as a small nose and thin hair. Does it matter? Hell no. Sophie Sweet has a killer butt, but, her breasts are tiny, doesn't matter either. Pam has huge breasts and a plastic surgery nightmare on her face, Britney has baby fat that pudges at her lower body, Lindsay has little more than a skeleton figure and Christie Brinkley is what?, Fifty years old?

Ladies, pluck a guy off of the street and ask him, 'Hey average guy would you kick any of these women out of bed?' You know the answer to that. 'Hell Nooooo!' Fact is ladies, you are no different than these women are. We all have 'flaws'. It's all in the presentation and your guy can be as attracted to you as him and other guys are to these women.

Spend some time on yourself ladies. You don't have to be rich to do it. I guarantee you that your guy will be more than happy to have you spending money on yourself. Get a facial (full cleaning and makeup), get a massage and aroma therapy, get your hair done by a stylist and get yourself some new clothes. Not something J Lo is trying to sell you. Something that works for you. Look for pictures of women that have a similar build and shape that you like and use it.

It sounds stupid but when you do all of this, have one goal in mind, To feel as clean and fresh as that model or actress looks.

Your guy will be looking at you with new eyes, no matter what you think you look like. No one has anything on you. You've got to remember that not every guy wants or desires the aforementioned women. The media just tells you so because they want your money. You look the way you're supposed to look and that's perfection.

If you know that you would look great thin and fit then start by correcting the quick things like the way you present what you have now, and then hit the gym. If you truly want it you'll find a way to do it. Whatever path you take to get the look you want, your guy is going to be looking at these women and thinking 'She ain't got nothing mine doesn't have.' , and you'll know it.

You'll be one of the women the guys at the mall are checking out, and your guy will notice that.

well hour glass for me is my size

Well many marriages are like that and the sad part is that
the thing that makes the two of you on & off lovers will
always come to surface when all the highnest of wedding
passes

Sorry i am repeating myself this topic need more than just one article. If the enjoyed reading "appreciate your man" this is much better just be patient as usual.
There are articles in abundance on what women want and need. There was even a movie recently, with Mel Gibson, about our secret feminine thoughts and desires, men spend hours trying to figure us out and what we need, but do we try to figure them out? You don’t see many about what men need and want, and they can be as mysterious to us, as we are to them. All women think they need to do is, rope ‘em, hog tie ‘em and throw ‘em in the barn…well men ain’t cattle girls, they know how to open that barn door even if we get them in there.

Usually all you read is bitter accounts by angry cold women, about why men aren’t worth much, and how to avoid the ones who may not be easy to catch, complete with titles and types and assessments of why you don’t want one like THAT… Well, ladies, I catch them…and if you want a good one, well, you better start figuring out what he wants or you aren’t going to get him, let alone keep him. My men are trying to figure out how to keep me, not escape me.

Every woman knows men are into chemistry, although what it is, is a bit unclear. What it is is sex appeal, it is, they want to appeal to us sexually, and for us to appeal to them sexually, is really all that is, it’s not looks or weight, or height or make up, it’s how we look at them and how we make them feel, if we make them feel like males, deep inside, they’re attracted to us. They’ll admit to that readily enough, but to get inside the mind of a man, to learn what it is that makes him choose to stay and commit? That’s the secret ladies, they have to want to commit to us. Most of us can all do enough to get them to stay for breakfast at any time. It’s keeping hold of them that’s tough. And to us, we want that commitment and they know it, but many of us want it because their paycheck comes with it. They want their money’s worth, and that is fair, girls, it is. They aren’t about to tell us this though, because they know we can be determined and devious. The line the bride sings walking down the aisle, of “Phew, I”ll never have to do THAT again!” Is a little too often true. They want truth and beauty, not to be a victim of some woman with a need for income. They believe in love more than we do at times.

Men hit about 35 and begin to wake up to a silent urging to procreate and nest, they reassess their life in the wild, and begin to consider settling down, they get as broody as any woman does. Or if they have procreated and nested, they begin to feel the urge to stretch their wings and fly, to seek out more, and feel the wonder again. Men aren’t one dimensional, is part of that, they need both, passion and comfort, home and freedom and sensuality, they’re really somewhat simple, they’ll give us everything if they can just be a star in their own lives. That’s really all it takes. That and they want an interesting life. Give them that, and they’ll line up to commit to who ever gives it to them.

You’ll hear wives lament and whine that he’s cheating on her, but what you don’t hear is why he is, and it’s not just some younger body, it’s… she’s interesting and the wife isn’t. The wife has become dull and boring, and to her, all life is about is vacuuming the house now, and she yells at him and whines at him, just like she does after he flies the coop! and he’s tired of sleeping with the maid whose got attitude, who’d want to sleep with a bad tempered tyrant!

Half of that is she berates him, it’s never enough, take out the garbage, fix the car, when are you going to mow the yard, she becomes this chore monger, another boss, so he has two jobs, not a home and a career. And she only lives to do chores, herself, he earns, he works, he takes second place in his own life, he is the gadget man, the vacuum cleaner with a mind, the guy who keeps life orderly for us, and not much else. The kids matter more, and Little League does, hey, girls, if they did that to US, we’d leave, in a second! And do. We’d never put up with working all day and handing over our check only to come home and get yelled at? And she wonders why he left?! Someone was nicer to him is why, and she wasn’t…You can’t keep cows in the barn if you leave the door open, ladies! Get a clue wifey, you weren’t what he needed, you were too busy making cupcakes to notice him, you said no fourteen times a week? And you didn’t keep your buns firm or your underwear sexy. You bored him into leaving and you berated him for not liking you that way. And you follow it up with insulting him after the fact that he’s shallow, and he has the problems! So were the cupcakes for the bake sale really THAT important? Cause you sure act like they are!

Men want fantasy, they want entertainment, they want the princess we are, they want the fairy sprite, the little girl in us who dreams, they want eternal youth from our INSIDES, but they also want the slut lurking within us all, they want excitement and to fly, and then land safely, they want to be our wings, our angels of destiny and if we deny them that part of us, if we refuse to go with them or let them take us on their flights of fancy, they lose, but so do we, all we are is housekeepers then, neither queen or LovePeddler, and not their partner in life either, we become grounded as the world moves on without us. We just exist to make dinner, when we could be going on exotic trips and living a life of dreams. We choose to be dull and boring, and then whine they don’t.

Classic sex symbols, from Mae West to Madonna, from Liz Taylor to Brittney Spears, are women men dream of, women of passion and fire, women who are playful and adventurous and have a natural sexuality. Men, dream of a nymphomaniac in their lives, or at least one who can be one at times? They want to be cherished, and adored and worshipped, and they should be! They want to be teased and pleased and played with. They want a playmate, a friend and a confidant. They want a woman who makes them proud, who their friends go WOW, where’d you find THAT one, you must be a stud huh? To keep HER! It’s a man thing, it’s pride, its competitiveness, it’s what makes them happy…its what makes them manly, ladies, if you want him to be more of a man, be more of a woman!

They want a princess to provide for, they want a woman who sparkles at them when they do things for her, and sighs and coos. They want her to be pleased, and surprised by their efforts to win her and appease her. They want to chase her and feel her give in to them. Ladies the guys want romance, not pink lace, real romance, the kind with feeling, the kind that has candlelight and soft music, and sighs, they want the longing glances and the deep involvement. And we sort of end up handing them Chef Boyardee and saying What’s your problem? Well, gosh, dinner from a can, might be some of it, the Dog eats dinner from a can, and we pet the darned dog at least? Or I pet mine, but maybe my dog lives better than your man does too? Consider that. That’s sort of sad isn’t it, for him.

They want her to be glamorous at times, slinky and sexy. They want her to be natural at times, and able to get ready in less than an hour, they want her in baseball caps and jeans, as they sit and fantasize about how hot she was last night, and watch her looking like a tomboy now. They want her to like their bodies, and revel in them, as males, to act like a greedy sexual creature who can’t get enough, at times, as well as listen to their thoughts, and try to make their dreams come true.

They want her to be all the women in the world at once, pure and innocent, devilish and dangerous, squirmy and high spirited, needy and soft, nurturing and comforting, and sexually awake and aware of sensual pleasures. They want the mother in us, the sister, and the slut, they want us to be as multi-dimensional as they are. They want the lady in the living room, the LovePeddler in the bedroom, and always have. Be that, and able to carry on a conversation about something other than yourself and your interests, and they will all eat from your hand, with pleasure.

And if we give them that, they really don’t care if we make dinner, or vacuum, they’ll do it, they’ll hire a maid, or they’ll take us out to dinner! Trust me on this, ladies, I don’t do housework! I do keep my passport handy just in case. It takes so long to go back for it, is why, we may miss the flight! I go places, I do things, I get taken out, and away, and I love that I do, they carry my bags, they open doors, and they buy me things to please me! And they call later! I love men, and it shows, and they love me right back!

They don’t want to hear, oooh, yuck, and no way, and you’re kidding, I’m not doing that! They want her to blush and go really? You want me to do that, for real, and try it…they want us to tell them that things feel good, and why, and how to touch us. They want to please us so we do go out of our minds with pleasure. They want to know what we think, but not about the sale at the grocery store, to them it doesn’t matter! It doesn’t! Who cares if lettuce is twenty cents less, like change matters? Now if you could do something sexual with that lettuce they’d want to know about that. They want to be pleased, surprised, seduced, coveted, treated with awe, and worshipped, that’s all! They want to be on a pedestal, just like they put us on one! And for that, they will give us everything they have, can find, can earn and look for more if it pleases us. We become their goddess, but only if we make them our gods…

I’m sexual, very…I like sex, I like a lot of it’s aspects, I enjoy exploring it, and adventuring in it. And there are men, who don’t like it as much as I do, that prefer quieter realms and softer ones, there are compatitble types, there are. But they still crave the sex, the affection and the bonding, and they have to have it ladies, it isn’t about they physically need, it’s how they express themselves to us, if we would only learn to listen! It’s their language, it’s primal, it’s instinctive and it holds them totally in its’ thrall, when we deny them that, they have to go looking, it’s male. They cannot survive without it, and neither can I.

I like a lot of different flavors in life, from the spicy to the sweet, to the hot and ice cold, salt and vinergar to sublimely mild. I like tastes, I like feelings, I like emotional intercourse, which by definition is communication. When we bond together in physical unity we can’t hide from each other, we allow each other inside us, and to me, life without that is pretty boring.

Changing our approach is so easy, it really is. When we join that exercise class at the gym, instead of whining about the effort and expecting to be praised, all we have to do is strip down and show them our behinds daily and say, “What do you think, is it getting smaller, is it getting tighter?” And they love it, and smile, and go hmmm, some, come over here, let me check closer. Then it becomes, for him, we work out, and then they’re more than happy to share it…they’ll check our progress with glee…and insist we take more classes, if they get to be part of it like THAT?

If we make dinner, add candles, dress for him, cook in just an apron for heavens sake? Want him to take out the trash more? Stand there naked. Wear a thong…and say, Like this? Well, as soon as I take out the trash? If I’m still in this mood…the trash is gone, girls, never to be mentioned again…if he forgets? Wear that same outfit…he will learn fast…see thong, take out garbage, get some, it’s like electricity to men. They’ll move so fast and while they’re out there, they’ll put your car away and close the garage door, they do not want more interruptions! As in phew, got her mind on me finally…I got to keep remembering that trash, or yikes she’s gonna find someone who will! Men learn so much quicker than we do. It is just about motivation, use that, there is no You forgot the trash again, oh no, he won’t forget…every day for six years, he’ll remember the naked woman saying I’m gonna take out the trash now…like his own private pin up girl.

And kids? Oh right those anti-romance creatures, uh, feed them early, put them to bed, they’ve had you all day? Daddy’s turn. Get a sitter, trade with a neighbor down the street, you keep mine tonight, I”ll keep yours tomorrow night…just give that man, some of what he needs, he’ll be happy! He had the kids, he loves them, just once in a while, he wants to play with the grownups too. And it doesn’t hurt the kids to be told, Mommy and Daddy are going to play together tonight, it’s our turn. You guys are going to bed early so we can. Give you Dad kiss now, night night.

And if I hear one more woman tell me she’s tired, in this day of electric appliances and television, here’s my answer…you will be more tired if you work all day and come home and then take care of the kids and have no one to help. Take a nap, plan it, don’t wear your self out dusting once in awhile, schedule your man like he matters! Quit whining, once women made the soap, spun the cloth, plowed fields, baked bread, ground flour, knit the socks, and still had the energy to kiss him hello and wrap her arms around him when he walked in, so what is your excuse? The dishwasher door was so heavy to close you’re tired now? He worked all day, he’s tired too! And all he wants is a cuddle and a squeeze and a big smile to see him and to cop a feel, like that’s hard to give him? Uh, give it to him ladies, or know, someone else will.

Men need several things, acceptance of their masculinity, pride in their existence, self esteem, love, affection, sensual pleasures, credit for their contributions, titillation and warm welcome, and to be important in their own lives and for that, they will give you everything they can gather to honor you and please you, they’ll lay anything at your feet, if you just treat them with respect and admiration.

It’s our call girls, it is…and it’s ok with me, if you don’t want to wake up to it! Cause your husband takes me to Paris while you’re busy at the PTA meeting, and I like going on trips to exotic destinations…and being treated like I’m important and wined and dined and catered to. You can do the PTA if you want? It’s ok with me!

Doubt me? Ask any man.

Thankyou everyone for all your nice comments. I found this site by accident but i see the problem
in our daily lives as male and female fightin when in truth we need each other. I know as a woman
my man drives me crazy sometimes but i will always appreciate my man. It is sad that some ladies
treat their men so badly and they wonder why their men cheat on them. I know some men are really
bad but look at it this way men cheat with women not other men so we are not that good after all.
If you have a boyfriend/husband this is for you and for my heroes men/guys/boys give this to your
girlfriends/wife

Why is it that nigerians we dont like readin anyway for the ladies like myself please read carefully i promise you will not be sorry and for the guys my sweets guys out there this is for you girlfriend, wife etc. My boyfriend found it on the net and made me read it and i am glad he did. We girls all believe we dont hav a problem that it is men/guys that have all the problem in the world(well they do play videogames, fighting on the street) but we also have our problem. I am not the perfect woman ok, i still drive my boyfriend crazy but i hav a better understanding of him now. He is a care guy and he deserves all the crazy sex in the world that he wants. Anyway i will stop here ok.

I love men. I love the way they move—their straight, tall spines and the way their eyes check out the perimeters of any new room they enter. I love the way they will protect anything smaller and more vulnerable than themselves. I love how generous and kind they are at heart. I love their focus and direction, how they can spend hours figuring out how it all works, endlessly fascinated. And yes, I love that they can lift the heavy stuff, start lawn mowers, open jars, and kill spiders.
I have grown up in a culture that doesn't give up the love to men very much. From bumbling dads like Bill Cosby who feed kids chocolate cake for breakfast to the comical but idiotic-like Homer Simpson or Everybody Loves Raymond, the images of men in our culture have served to show them as silly and superfluous.
My daughter, now fifteen, has an even less clear definition of the masculine to go on. She is entering a world of dating where men are "metrosexual" or "ubersexual"—perfectly coiffed, buff, hairless men who can go head-to-head with her in deciding on wedding favors and colors for the curtains. It makes my head spin.
To me, one of the best things about men is how different they are from women. It is, admittedly, one of the most frustrating things about them, too. I can understand the world's constant pressure to create a gender neutral ground where we can all communicate in the same language, instead of trying to speak two versions of alien to each other. On the other hand, if you take all the masculine out of the masculine and all the feminine out of the feminine, you no longer have anything to attract the other. Neutral things have no charge, no spark.
As a woman, I love and revel in the differences between the sexes, physical and otherwise. I know too many women, though, who hate men. I don't even know if they know they hate men, but the way they talk about men—their husbands, brothers, fathers—is so demeaning and castrating that it makes me cringe to hear it. I know, because I used to talk about and think about men this way, too, at a certain point in my life.
In my marriages, one failed, and one a work in progress, I have discovered a few things about really appreciating the men in my life. I learned it by trial-and-error and by making a lot of mistakes. I'm still by no means perfect—I often lapse in my appreciation of the opposite sex—but I always come back to it now, and remember how much I really do love men. They are amazing, and so deserving of feminine recognition.
And the secret is—are you ready for this?—they live for it. In fact, if a man isn't being appreciated by the feminine, eventually, he just disappears. Sometimes, he literally leaves, and sometimes he just checks out of the relationship somehow. He craves appreciation, acknowledgment and respect. Now, let me be clear. I'm not talking about approval. That sets up a power dynamic, more like a mommy approving (or disapproving) of a son. That's not what he wants.
I'm talking about appreciation, an open expression of heartfelt gratitude. It's so simple. He carries in the groceries. You say thank you. He fixes the dishwasher. You listen to all the ins and outs of his trial and error method, ooo-ing and ahh-ing in all the right places, and in the end, you kiss him and thank him for your amazing new working convenient and time-saving appliance.
It sounds contrived, but I'm not saying you should do it in an insincere way. In fact, he'll know if you're not really appreciative. And frankly, aren't you truly glad that he's strong enough to carry in the groceries? Aren't you glad you don't have to wash dishes by hand? And beyond that, aren't you grateful that he's willing to do something so generous for you?
Giving him a genuine expression of your appreciation in the moment is like putting money in your relationship bank. You are investing in the future of your relationship with every smile, kind word, touch, and thank you.
Here's another little secret—the more you thank him and appreciate what he does—the more he will do. This doesn't mean you should say thank you as a manipulation. It should always be a genuine expression of your heart. Still, expressing your gratitude creates this wonderful cycle of generosity from your partner, which in turn inspires more appreciation from you, and so it goes.
Men are actually very kind and generous souls. When women make demands on men, they feel burdened, and often seem stingy. You can tell a man what you want, and in fact, you should. Contrary to feminine belief, men are not mind readers. They want a woman who knows what she wants, and who will express that. But that doesn't include making demands or bargains to get it.
I knew a woman once who hated MouthAction—giving it, of course—but she wanted a new diamond ring for their tenth anniversary. So, she made a bargain. "I will give you a Mouth Gig every time you put away a hundred dollars toward my ring." After the newness of MouthAction wore off for him, though, he got bored, and stopped putting money away.
Yes, a man bored with blowjobs. How could this be? Because he knew that, for her, it was just a means to an end. There are very few men that I know who want to feel as if a woman is with them just to get something. He would rather forgo the MouthAction than feel like he was being used or manipulated. If you are giving your "appreciation" just to get something, you can forget it. It will backfire every time.
And here we come to another secret about men. Do you know the best way you can show a man you truly appreciate him? You might not believe me, but I've found that it's generally true. Men want to experience a woman experiencing pleasure. It is the most tantalizing thing in the world for the masculine. That doesn't necessarily mean in bed, although there, too, of course, but it can be as simple as laughing at his jokes, smiling at him when he does something goofy, or saying "Mmm!" when he brings you chocolate.
It's really as simple as enjoying life in his presence. He loves and lives for giving you pleasure, in bed and out. I knew a woman whose husband constantly complained about how much she spent on clothes. She was a beautiful woman, with a great figure, and she was, admittedly, a huge clothes horse. You know the kind, with more shoes than Imelda Marcos. This was a huge power struggle between them, until finally, she gave up and said, "Fine. I won't buy any clothes unless you buy them for me."
What happened? She discovered that her husband was actually much more generous with her than she had been with herself. He took her shopping, bought her beautiful dresses that she would have been afraid to purchase because their price tags were cost-prohibitive. Instead of sneaking her purchases here and there, filling her closets on the sly, she allowed him to give her pleasure, which in turn gave him pleasure, and the outcome was better than she could have imagined.
This applies to between the sheets as well. The best way you can appreciate your man in bed? Open yourself to receiving pleasure from him. Go ahead and ask your man what gives him more pleasure—his enjoyment, or yours. You'll be surprised by the response.
He gets an incredible rush from giving you orgasms, from making you moan and squeal and giggle and gasp. There is nothing that makes a man feel more appreciated and acknowledged than watching his lover's face as she dies into bliss in his arms, knowing he took her to that place.
Now, that said—men don't want a performance. In spite of the "When Harry Met Sally" conjecture that a man doesn't really know when a woman is faking—men aren't stupid. They are linear, focused, clear and direct, but they aren't stupid. They know when a woman is acting, when she isn't really feeling what she's expressing. They know when someone is being insincere and disingenuous, and they will know if you are faking, even if they don't say so.
Which brings us to the two things that you can do to cultivate appreciation for a man: 1.) Know what you want 2.) Ask for what you want. I know it sounds like a paradox, but the best appreciation a man can receive is to experience the deepest, most genuine pleasure of a woman.
In or out of bed, this applies. And of course rule number three would be: 3.) Thank him for giving you what you wanted. It's so simple, and yet so many women don't have a clue what they want, or if they do know, they don't know how to ask for it, and then, if they get it, they're so embarrassed for wanting it in the first place, they find it hard to say "thank you."
What you need to remember is that a woman's enjoyment is the secret ingredient. He wants to see that everything he does, everything he works for, everything he offers, is appreciated by his woman, whether that's watching her face when she opens the gift, or seeing her eyes light up when he gives her flowers, or watching her toes curl when she cums.
"But what if my man doesn't do that kind of stuff!" you say? Recognize what he does do, right now. I don't care how small it is. Did he bring in the garbage cans? Thank him. Did he rinse his dinner dishes? Thank him. Did he take the baby for an hour? Thank him. I don't care if you asked him to do it, or if it's something he's "supposed to do and why should I thank him for that?" Thank him.
Find that spark of gratitude in your heart, and give it to him. The more you do, the brighter the fire will burn between you. Now, there is one caveat to appreciating a man. A woman has to be able to express her pleasure and enjoyment without demeaning him or making him small in the process. In other words, there should be no "Buts" attached to the "Thank yous."
"Thank you for rinsing your dishes, BUT you could have put them in the dishwasher." "Thank you for taking the baby, BUT you didn't change his diaper." "Thank you for bringing in the garbage cans, BUT you forgot to shut the back door." That "BUT" will serve to negate the appreciation. It's like putting money in the bank and taking it right back out again. You never build a surplus. So what if you're right? And of course, you are. But would you rather feel pleasure or anger? Would you rather feel right or feel loved?
So, he didn't put the dishes in the dishwasher, or change the baby's diaper, or shut the back door, but he did rinse his dishes, take the baby and bring in the garbage cans. Acknowledge and appreciate the small stuff. You will find, soon enough, that you will have more and more to acknowledge, as time goes on, because the more you do, the more he will do, too.
The hardest part I've found is saying "Thank you" when my own tank doesn't feel full. When I feel like I'm running on empty, it's the last thing I want to do. When this happens, I know I'm not experiencing enough joyful things in my life. I need to take some time for myself—take a bath, take a walk, take a break. Usually, after I do something for me, I can find that gratitude in my heart again.
One of the ways I've found to really appreciate my man when I know I've been slacking off in the appreciation department (and I know, because I start feeling grouchy and hostile and resentful of everything) is to stand in front of him, put my hand on his heart, and say, "My magnificent man, I really appreciate you for_____." You fill in the blank.
It can be one thing, or ten. The more, the better, actually. You'll find yourself softening, too, the more things you can find to acknowledge him for. And ask any man reading this right now, even as goofy as the "my magnificent man" part sounds, if he would love to have his woman put her hand on his heart and say such a thing with all the love in the world in her eyes? Go ahead, ask. You might be surprised.
When it comes to appreciating men, a woman really has everything she needs already. She's built for pleasure and he craves her enjoyment of it. It's really a beautiful thing, when it works. A woman who is self-confident, who knows what she wants and expresses it without being demanding, and who can revel in her sincere, genuine enjoyment and pleasure, will go a long way toward being able to truly appreciate the man in her life.

It is a message to guys on what work, and a message to women like a mirror

:-x :-x :-x :-x

Well that is why is a post HR.hotness i cant be specific ok

iice i know we women like to do that. We want to prove someone wrong that we are always right,
well i am not talkin about u i am talkin about all women includin you and me so deal with it.

i think it is the men that cos the problem.
If you show a girl u hav money when u dont that she will
ask u for money. Cut your jeans to your legs well boys

Now that's a loaded question if I ever heard one, lol.

Here's the thing, 

Different women have different expectations about what they want from a man and a relationship.

For example, a young woman may not know what she wants in a relationship simply because she isn't experienced enough to know what's important to her yet.

A more mature woman, one who's been in a lot of different relationships, may know exactly what she's looking for in a relationship.

But there's one thing all types of women know about before they get into a relationship, 

They know what they're ATTRACTED to!

See, the female mind processes things in this manner:

1. Is there something attracting me to this man?

2. Will this man be a good fit for me in the long term?

Usually, number 1 will kick in almost immediately within the first few minutes of meeting a man. They'll start evaluating the man's attraction quotient.

Number two won't kick in until number one has been met.

This means that if you can get a woman really turned on, or even in bed, then she'll immediately start evaluating you based on your potential for a long term relationship.

Women who try and do this backwards, by getting into a relationship and hoping the attraction will grow, usually end up disappointed.

When it comes to what women are actually looking for in a relationship, you can expect these factors to come into play:

How well does the man treat her?
What is the level of attraction occurring?
How good is he in bed?
How strong is the emotional connection?
How good of a provider is he?

Let's quickly go through these five female relationship factors, 

The first factor can be misleading. All women want to be treated well, but they don't necessarily want to be treated like goddesses to be fawned over.

(Sure, that's okay from time to time, but too much of a good thing is a bad thing, )

Women want to feel like the man they are with is loving and strong. So if you treat them in a way where they know you care, know they are safe, but know you won't take their bullcrap, they will feel well treated.

The next factor has to do with what we discussed earlier. If they are still feeling sexual attraction towards you, then this factor is met. But if things have fizzled, this could be a deal breaker.

Most women aren't used to having men who are good in bed. So if you can please her between the sheets, then chances are she'll see you as a "keeper."

If there is a strong emotional connection, a woman will want to be around you. She will feel connected to you and want to please you. This is a very important factor in any relationship.

Women who don't have a strong emotional connection to the men they are in a relationship with will tend to cheat on them, because they aren't being fulfilled emotionally.

Finally, a man who is a good provider will make a woman feel safe and cared for.

Many women will gravitate towards men who can pay their bills, even if all the other relationship factors are absent.

But this doesn't mean that type of relationship is a happy or stable one (for either party).

Showing a woman you're a good provider is probably the least important factor in a strong relationship, but it is still a factor.

But the first step you need to be aware of before you can even begin to THINK about relationships, is the initial ATTRACTION phase.

And that phase starts with how you MEET her.

I personally believe that any man has the potential to attract any woman.

If they know what to do.

What kind of a virgin is she? The kind that has kisses only, the kind that romancies with her clothes off or the kind that sucks dicks only. She
should have bargain with the client. Anyway she knew that she was gettin into and you dont change the rules of the game in the middle of
it. I feel we are hearin this because she didnt like the client, if she did it will be a different story

All the ladies in the house living in PH want to know if a guy loves u
give him what he wants sex not that i love you rubblish ok. Maybe
we will give u money if that is your problem or love etc but give us
want we want sex.

I am fore

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