Despite d BAD NEWS from MTN dis morning on our dear SME Data packages we go still d laugh na.

Mr Akpos fiancee said to him, "Now that we are
engaged, we should start calling each other pet
names".
He asked her, "So what do u want to be calling
me?"
She said, "I'll be calling u TIGER". "Why?" he
asked.
"Coz u're handsome, tall, charming, strong,
calculating, smart
& very good in BEDmatics".
She then asked him, "What will u be calling me?"
Mr Akpos said, "Zebra"
The lady still smiling seductively, "Wow, that's lovely & sweet.
Why did u choose such a lovely name?"
"Because of ur STRETCH MARKS"

Have a great weekend all n don't forget to share

callydon:


why im come b say na for my turn this thing go come change


Silently watching what's happening...

no vex bros, but the minimum I can now share on mtn is 1gb.

Akpos spits saliva in his palms and starts rubbing it all over his head
Teacher: Akpors! What stupid thing are you
doing? .. what is the essence of smearing your
head with saliva ??

Akpors: because what you are teaching
isnt entering.

Teacher: and so what has that got to do
with saliva?

Akpors: I overheard my mum last night telling dad in their bedroom that if it is difficult for it to enter, apply some saliva on the head

*gtg* *gtg* *gtg* *gtg*

Akpos asked Chichi in a library;

“Do you mind if I sit beside you?"

Chichi answered with a loud voice; "I DON’T WANT TO SPEND
THE NIGHT WITH YOU!!!”

All the students in the library started staring at Akpos and he felt embarrassed. After a couple of minutes, Chichi walked quietly to Akpos’ table and she told him

"I study psychology and I know what someone is thinking, I guess you felt embarrassed right?"

Akpos responded with a loud voice: "N50,000 JUST FOR ONE NIGHT!!!? THAT’S TOO MUCH NA!!!"

Everyone in the library looked at Chichi in shock and Akpos whispered in her ears.

"I study Law and I know how to make someone feel guilty"

EnterPRO:


no vex bros, but the minimum I can now share on mtn is 1gb.

What happens to us light-weights?

Etesam:
What happens to us light-weights?

time to step up be that na

I hardly exhaust my 250mb

EnterPRO:


time to step up be that na

LogoDWhiz:
Akpos spits saliva in his palms and starts rubbing it all over his head
Teacher: Akpors! What stupid thing are you
doing? .. what is the essence of smearing your
head with saliva ??

Akpors: because what you are teaching
isnt entering.

Teacher: and so what has that got to do
with saliva?

Akpors: I overheard my mum last night telling dad in their bedroom that if it is difficult for it to enter, apply some saliva on the head

*gtg* *gtg* *gtg* *gtg*

You no well

KingTom:

You no well

lol!

Being long i saw u.

LogoDWhiz:


lol!

Being long i saw u.

I was banned o my bro, just released today

KingTom:

I was banned o my bro, just released today

Wow!
That's serious

hope you're good now?

And is d strike over?

LogoDWhiz:


Wow!
That's serious

hope you're good now?

And is d strike over?

Its been over for a while now

@BC : congrats!

A little old lady answered her doorbell and saw a well-dressed young man carrying a vacuum cleaner.

"Good morning," said the young man. "If I could take a couple of minutes of your time, I would
like to demonstrate the very latest in high-powered vacuum cleaners."

"Go away!" said the old lady. "I haven't got any money!"

As she closed the door, the young man quickly wedged his foot in the door and pushed it open.

"Don't be too hasty!" he said. "Not until you have at least seen my demonstration."

And with that, he emptied a bucket of horse manure onto her hallway carpet.

"If this vacuum cleaner does not remove all traces of this horse
manure from your carpet,
ma'am, I will personally eat the remainder."

The old lady stepped back and said, "Well I hope you've got a damned good appetite, because
they cut off my electricity this morning."

LogoDWhiz:
Akpos spits saliva in his palms and starts rubbing it all over his head
Teacher: Akpors! What stupid thing are you
doing? .. what is the essence of smearing your
head with saliva ??

Akpors: because what you are teaching
isnt entering.

Teacher: and so what has that got to do
with saliva?

Akpors: I overheard my mum last night telling dad in their bedroom that if it is difficult for it to enter, apply some saliva on the head

*gtg* *gtg* *gtg* *gtg*

hahaha
crazy joke

Dygeasy:
A little old lady answered her doorbell and saw a well-dressed young man carrying a vacuum cleaner.

"Good morning," said the young man. "If I could take a couple of minutes of your time, I would
like to demonstrate the very latest in high-powered vacuum cleaners."

"Go away!" said the old lady. "I haven't got any money!"

As she closed the door, the young man quickly wedged his foot in the door and pushed it open.

"Don't be too hasty!" he said. "Not until you have at least seen my demonstration."

And with that, he emptied a bucket of horse manure onto her hallway carpet.

"If this vacuum cleaner does not remove all traces of this horse
manure from your carpet,
ma'am, I will personally eat the remainder."

The old lady stepped back and said, "Well I hope you've got a damned good appetite, because
they cut off my electricity this morning."

lwkmd

Pls,I need 2 ask u somtin dat has kept me
sleepless.It myt be awkward b/w us afta
dis,bt i hv 2 knw hw u feel.I hv kept it in
mind
4 a while now bt i tink it's finaly tym i
straighten up & confront u,i jst hop dis
doesnt ruin our frndship,i need 2 knw & i
dnt
knw any oda way i cld get ova dis.It jst
doesnt
seem fair on me if i dnt get an answer.I wnt
u
2 tel me truthfuly no matter hw harsh it is,al
i
need is ur honest answer.Pls hw much is
pure
water in ur area

dungas30:
Pls,I need 2 ask u somtin dat has kept me
sleepless.It myt be awkward b/w us afta
dis,bt i hv 2 knw hw u feel.I hv kept it in
mind
4 a while now bt i tink it's finaly tym i
straighten up & confront u,i jst hop dis
doesnt ruin our frndship,i need 2 knw & i
dnt
knw any oda way i cld get ova dis.It jst
doesnt
seem fair on me if i dnt get an answer.I wnt
u
2 tel me truthfuly no matter hw harsh it is,al
i
need is ur honest answer.Pls hw much is
pure
water in ur area

..bros e cost ohh.

dungas30:
Pls,I need 2 ask u somtin dat has kept me
sleepless.It myt be awkward b/w us afta
dis,bt i hv 2 knw hw u feel.I hv kept it in
mind
4 a while now bt i tink it's finaly tym i
straighten up & confront u,i jst hop dis
doesnt ruin our frndship,i need 2 knw & i
dnt
knw any oda way i cld get ova dis.It jst
doesnt
seem fair on me if i dnt get an answer.I wnt
u
2 tel me truthfuly no matter hw harsh it is,al
i
need is ur honest answer.Pls hw much is
pure
water in ur area

..bros e cost ohh.

Dygeasy:
So far so good

Yours?

Lol...Dygeasy, why all the jokes na

chibwike:
Lol...Dygeasy, why all the jokes na

We are winning something here. The least you could do is share my post that I shared. You'll be helping me that way.

Dygeasy:
A little old lady answered her doorbell and saw a well-dressed young man carrying a vacuum cleaner.

"Good morning," said the young man. "If I could take a couple of minutes of your time, I would
like to demonstrate the very latest in high-powered vacuum cleaners."

"Go away!" said the old lady. "I haven't got any money!"

As she closed the door, the young man quickly wedged his foot in the door and pushed it open.

"Don't be too hasty!" he said. "Not until you have at least seen my demonstration."

And with that, he emptied a bucket of horse manure onto her hallway carpet.

"If this vacuum cleaner does not remove all traces of this horse
manure from your carpet,
ma'am, I will personally eat the remainder."

The old lady stepped back and said, "Well I hope you've got a damned good appetite, because
they cut off my electricity this morning."

***Falls inside Volcano***

how much is the mtn 1gb for card and cash?

Please help me pray 4 my neighbour's daughter.We are on our way
2 d hospital now. She swallowed Memory Card (8G) & she is singing
all d songs on it. We don't know wat wil happen wen she gets 2 d
videos . hapi week.

AkPOS was baptized and dipped in water 3 times.
At the 3rd time the Pastor said: "You are now
baptized.
.
You are a new creation the old one is gone. No
more drinking of alcohol for you. Your new name
is Jacob."
.
Jacob went back home and headed straight for the fridge. He took a Heineken, dipped it in water 3 times and said:
"You are now a new creation, the old one is gone. Your new name is Orange Juice!!!...

Believe13:
how much is the mtn 1gb for card and cash?

N1200 cash or N1500 card

@ Dygeasy : congrats! Now you can get 1gb for N1200 card with the N300 discount you just won.

@akinremedy : not cool. kindly remove your adverts.


@all : Etisalat Reseller plans available. Whatsapp for details.

special discount on glo plans too. details on whatsapp.

EnterPRO:


N1200 cash or N1500 card

@ Dygeasy : congrats! Now you can get 1gb for N1200 card with the N300 discount you just won.

@akinremedy : not cool. kindly remove your adverts.


@all : Etisalat Reseller plans available. Whatsapp for details.

special discount on glo plans too. details on whatsapp.

Sorry boss, won't happen again.

EnterPRO:


N1200 cash or N1500 card

@ Dygeasy : congrats! Now you can get 1gb for N1200 card with the N300 discount you just won.

@akinremedy : not cool. kindly remove your adverts.


@all : Etisalat Reseller plans available. Whatsapp for details.

special discount on glo plans too. details on whatsapp.

Thanks Boss!!! But...

Whatsapp sha. I'll holla!

Akpos' next door neighbour had a baby.

Unfortunately, the little
baby was born without ears. When they
arrived home from
the hospital, the
parents invited Akpos' family to come over and
see their new baby.

Akpos' parents
were very sure their son would make silly comments about the
baby. So, Akpos'
dad decided to have a talk with Akpos before going to the neighbour's house.

He said, "Now, son,
that poor baby was born with no ears. I want you to be on your best
behaviour and not
say one word about his ears, or I'm really going
to beat the hell out of you when we come back home."

"OK Dad. I promise, I won't mention his ears
at all," replied Akpos.

At the neighbour's house, Akpos leaned over the
crib and touched the baby's
hand. He looked at the mother and said,

"Oh, what a
beautiful little
baby!"

The mother, who had braced herself
for Akpos' comment, was
pleasantly surprised and replied;

"Thank you very much, Akpos."



Akpos then
continued, "This baby has perfect little hands and perfect little feet. Why, just look at his pretty little eyes! Did his doctor say he can see clearly?"

The mother, who was a bit surprised by Akpos' question, replied;

"Yes ... his doctor said he has a good vision. Why do you ask?"

Akpos said, "Well,
it's a good thing, because i'm very sure he can't wear glasses.