so you think the way a woman dresses determines her promiscuity?

yes, as a matter of fact. It does.

but that's a topic for another thread.

maclatunji:

You seem up for a discussion. I assume you are married. How do you feel if and when you receive compliments from men via social media? What about those who "hit on you"? How does that make you feel?

I say thank you, and think its good they appriciate beauty even if they are married, and even if I am. I am not gonna hide away just because I have a ring on my finger, but I do not expose myself tacky, no.
If they hit on me, I say thanks, but no thanks. I am happy with my husband. Not worse than that.
Even girls in hijab get hit on, honey..

@OP: marriage isn't bondage and indecent dressing isn't good for anyone either single or married. this type of thinking is wat actually make a lot of pple esp ladies misbehave b'cos they want to live life b4 they enter the 'CAGE'. i would advice u discuss such wit d person u intend to marry so she knows that after marriage, she is expected to change her phone no, deactivate her fb and all other social network accounts, not accept compliments from men etc.

iragbijile:

What? The women here are married? What am I doing here?

they are all married but they luv to flirt and when they finally land in a messy situation all they say is had i known!!!

tpia@:


yes, as a matter of fact. It does.

but that's a topic for another thread.

tpia, you have come again with your backward reasoning ---
what makes you more decent than a woman who loves to show some skin?

Truckpusher: they are all married but they luv to flirt and when they finally land in a messy situation all they say is had i known!!!

you must have loads of idle time on your hands to worry about messy situation....

Smh. 7 out of 10 times, the husband would be horrified if he ever gets the chance to read the messages in his wife's inbox/outbox (facebook and whatnot). But then, some husbands are just too 'secure' to bother about that - to the delight of their appreciative wives [s]and their extramarital 'admirers' and ex's[/s].

Western education and the influence of the western media/culture has had too many unintended consequences for Africans of this generation. I guess we might as well adopt the 'open marriage' model, since that absolves both parties of moral responsibility and ensures mutual rest of mind. The present traditional model that prioritises fidelity is fast becoming incompatible with the re-negotiated (im)morality of the Social Media generation.

jennykadry: If everyone saw things the way I see things, this thread will not have passed Page 1. You honor this sort of threads and you fulfil the wish of the thread starter.......Making it popular and moving it to the front page.

Well done y'all.

My exact thoughts.Mtcheewwwwwww

We r Africans n Nigerians we have our way of life not d western culture n our own culture must be observed so as to preserve our moral standard. In essence a married woman should be careful d type of pics she display not nude that will interest d other sex or better not at all n always remember she is married.

coogar:

oh dear -----



don't get excited, fella!
you don't want a married woman to expose herself on a social medium because she might be seen as advertising her wares - it then [b]suggests [/b]you think a woman that is well covered up is absolutely decent, isn't it?

@bolded, your suggestion.

In case you haven't noticed, I used the word "splash" not "post" pictures, that implies that the "individual" posts multiple pictures at once with different poses. Hence my questions in the thread opening. Again, you see what you want to see,

The very problem you have with Nigerian guys, that's the same problem we have with you, please go through your thread again.

hannydarl:

Go ask the person that gave you the message of not allowing women post photo if there is more don't dos for us to come. So we women can prepare.
Insecure man using woman to show power. I pity your wife. Inshort sef its your type that women cook and eat on their heads. Come to nairaland and ask crazy question. Unrepantant adulterer looking at womens photos all over the internet and in true fashion of a cave man blames the woman for glueing his eyes to her photo.

OMG! See vexing... Na wah o!

JallowBah:

I say thank you, and think its good they appriciate beauty even if they are married, and even if I am. I am not gonna hide away just because I have a ring on my finger, but I do not expose myself tacky, no.
If they hit on me, I say thanks, but no thanks. I am happy with my husband. Not worse than that.
Even girls in hijab get hit on, honey..

I agree with the bolded.

However, do you concede that your husband might feel jealous if he read some of the comments that you would get after posting several "catchy pictures"?

maclatunji:

@bolded, your suggestion.

In case you haven't noticed, I used the word "splash" not "post" pictures, that implies that the "individual" posts multiple pictures at once with different poses. Hence my questions in the thread opening. Again, you see what you want to see,

so it has come down to splash/post technicality?
mac, do yourself a favour: delete this woman from your facebook. it's obvious she's making you lust over her and the scriptures say you should remove whatever makes you sin!

maclatunji:
I agree with the bolded.

However, do you concede that your husband might feel jealous if he read some of the comments that you would get after posting several "catchy pictures"?

and how sure are you it's not the husband "splashing" those pics to identify the friends of his wife that are potential sex deviants?

For social reason, no that isn't right any more.

What a sexist's world. The thread is a biased towards womanhood. Is it right for men to display pictures on social media ? WHy is the thread targeting women? Facebook and other social media are an online repository for photo collections, They are, apart from social networking portal, also e-album for pictures. There is nothing wrong for a "man" or "woman" displaying pictures online for archiving purpose. This is 21st century.

bukatyne: @OP: marriage isn't bondage and indecent dressing isn't good for anyone either single or married. this type of thinking is wat actually make a lot of pple esp ladies misbehave b'cos they want to live life b4 they enter the 'CAGE'. i would advice u discuss such wit d person u intend to marry so she knows that after marriage, she is expected to change her phone no, deactivate her fb and all other social network accounts, not accept compliments from men etc.

The bolded is totally unnecessary as I have no problem with above. It is how she manages them that I would be more interested in. I enjoy photography, a few Nairalanders can attest to that. However, everything comes with a perspective and relativity.

coogar:

so it has come down to splash/post technicality?
mac, do yourself a favour: delete this woman from your facebook. it's obvious she's making you lust over her and the scriptures say you should remove whatever makes you sin!



and how sure are you it's not the husband "splashing" those pics to identify the friends of his wife that are potential sexual deviants?

Another wrong conclusion. You see many Nairalanders have a problem: If you think someone has made an "outrageous" comment, ask for clarifications before jumping to conclusions.

mrperfect: For social reason, no that isn't right any more.

Why do you say this sir?

I SMELL DIVORCE EVERYWHERE!

JallowBah:

Pffft.

Men hit on me even I am wearing baggy pants and no make up with a big t-shirt.

duh, baggy pants means there's more space to enter your pants.

@ op: I personally would not care if my wife posts a nice pix of herself on social media. That does not distinguish a attention-seeking or disciplined woman. There are a lot of women ,as well as guys, that rarely post anything on social media and they make Nackson and domitila look like innocent babies. Do you know how old these ladies were when they started getting hit on by boys and men? Do you think it will stop because they are married? Guy even if u keep her under lock and key or she hids herself in the basement because of guys; character, values and discipline will determine if she will fall into temptation.

maclatunji:

Another wrong conclusion. You see many Nairalanders have a problem: If you think someone has made an "outrageous" comment, ask for clarifications before jumping to conclusions.

i hate to be spoonfed - next time, word your comments properly so people would not be misled!

The OP will end up having high blood pressure.
That's the problem with egotistical and idealist men,
whom dwell to much on things that are impractical. It's
a free world, and learn to live and let's live (even in marriage);
that saves you a whole lot of stress and heartache.

This thread personifies why some grown arse men cry about being
heartbroken, and cry around like kids. This is real life, mate,
best believe that no one can be trusted, even women who cover
themselves with hijab from head to toe lol.

La familiar, get yourself busy and stop worrying about what others do.
If you can't find something to keep you busy, get yourself
some girls outside your marriage for 'bootycall' from time to time;
and problem solved.

Marriage to me means, companionship!

blaise26.abj:
@ op: I personally would not care if my wife posts a nice pix of herself on social media. That does not distinguish a attention-seeking or disciplined woman. There are a lot of women ,as well as guys, that rarely post anything on social media and they make Nackson and domitila look like innocent babies. Do you know how old these ladies were when they started getting hit on by boys and men? Do you think it will stop because they are married? Guy even if u keep her under lock and key or she hids herself in the basement because of guys; character, values and discipline will determine if she will fall into temptation.

Abeg no mind the guy jare.
If the wife likes, she fit go the nyansh
anybody, as long as say she no bring her
nonsense come my dormot, and she dey look
after the kids, and everything is in order;
life dey good

U know say u get problem, if one woman dey
turn una head around loool.

maclatunji:

I agree with the bolded.

However, do you concede that your husband might feel jealous if he read some of the comments that you would get after posting several "catchy pictures"?

Not more jealous then what he feels when men try to hit me up in public, and most of THEM already know I am married.
I get jealous when women commpliments him as well at times, but I am still not gonna tell him to not put up a single picture..

denzel2009:

duh, baggy pants means there's more space to enter your pants.

Lol.

JallowBah:

Not more jealous then what he feels when men try to hit me up in public, and most of THEM already know I am married.
I get jealous when women commpliments him as well at times, but I am still not gonna tell him to not put up a single picture..

The question I would like to ask is: will you take practical steps to prevent a scenario that your husband would get jealous in should it occur? In other words, if you know that this picture(s) you are about to post would lead to comments that your husband would be jealous about, would you stop or go ahead? If you answer no. Why? In view of the fact that your husband's "Jealousy" would be aroused.

hannydarl: Backward Nigerian men, next we will hear is , IS IT OKAY TO TRAIN MY GIRL CHILD? SINCE SHE WILL BE OWNED BY ANOTHER MAN ONE DAY.
Don't let your wife take photos, don't let her leave the house(Even though you go about fucking small girls everyday) don't let her go anywhere o. Cos your prick is her master.
Habba woman cannot eat carrot or cucumber woman should stop wearing bra, woman should not be educated, woman should kneel down and present food and water, woman should wait in room and make sure she greets oga first cos its a crime for oga to wake up go to the kitchen hug his darling from behind and say good mornning dear how was your night? Its taboo for Nigerian men. Woman should not use makeup , woman should then be bought and locked in ya papa's house nau while goats and cows roam free.

Its for ur own good

maclatunji:

The question I would like to ask is: will you take practical steps to prevent a scenario that your husband would get jealous in should it occur? In other words, if you know that this picture(s) you are about to post would lead to comments that your husband would be jealous about, would you stop or go ahead? If you answer no. Why? In view of the fact that your husband's "Jealousy" would be aroused.

I dont post anything he would not approve of, no.
He knows that it might lead to someone saying I am beautiful, but he also knows it wont go longer than "thank you".

For me provided it's not an indecent picture,some women who put the pictures may be trying to communicate to their female friends where they were over the weekend etc.
I trust my wife so much that I believe she will not be naughty in any of the social medium.I even told her not to add me in her Facebook friends or even to follow her on twitter so that she can be free to associate with her friends without looking at her back to think how I will see about her comments. I only add her to my Facebook friends when I am abroad for easy communication but once I am back in Nigeria, I delete her again

pro01: Smh. 7 out of 10 times, the husband would be horrified if he ever gets the chance to read the messages in his wife's inbox/outbox (facebook and whatnot). But then, some husbands are just too 'secure' to bother about that - to the delight of their appreciative wives [s]and their extramarital 'admirers' and ex's[/s].

Western education and the influence of the western media/culture has had too many unintended consequences for Africans of this generation. I guess we might as well adopt the 'open marriage' model, since that absolves both parties of moral responsibility and ensures mutual rest of mind. The present traditional model that prioritises fidelity is fast becoming incompatible with the re-negotiated (im)morality of the Social Media generation.

you omitted something sir, fidelity on the part of the women...

maclatunji:

I agree that the same should apply to men too. You never asked my opinion, you just concluded.

sorry, but judging by your post i thought you were saying it should apply to women only. Didn't know u felt that way.