Getting Married Without A Job - Family (2) - Nairaland
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| Re: Getting Married Without A Job by y2kaustin(m): 11:15pm On Sep 04, 2012 |
Can anyone tell me,Why Igbo ladies marry at old age?And they r ugly. |
| Re: Getting Married Without A Job by Iyaqueen(f): 11:15pm On Sep 04, 2012 |
Hello dear, I leave in d England,no paper if u know Wat I mean,but I still try to send stuff home to sell so sometin can still come in,we ladies like to buy stuff,ll u be collecting every pences from him,hmmmmmm he ll complain one day,just 1 day  1 Like |
| Re: Getting Married Without A Job by Morgan1092(m): 11:17pm On Sep 04, 2012 |
[/quote]...Plz I want the married ladies here to share with me their experiences and the men, how they felt when marrying their wives that weren't working.[/quote] Is it only married ppl dat wud advice u? We dat r singles re exempted. |
| Re: Getting Married Without A Job by Nobody: 11:17pm On Sep 04, 2012 |
401kk: I even thought you were a man. This is not a big deal, most nigerian marriages are financed by the men because they see it as an obligation. That's right. I thought it was a case of one mumu love-struck jobless Romeo that wants to marry 'by-fire-by-force' so that another well to do man wouldn't snatch his Juliet. Lol. The OP has no problem as long as her husband is capable and isn't complaining. I reckon most men I know do not care that much about their wife's employment status. All they want is a good woman who would keep her laps closed to 'intruders', take care of him and the homefront, and generally behave like a good wife should. Employment and financial security in a marriage context is a much bigger worry for men than women, particularly in the early stages - at least in this part of the world. So the OP can afford to take her time, develop herself, and explore worthwhile options until something meaningful materialises in the long run. I must however commend her thoughtfulness and seeming good sense though. That's a rarity among young naija women these days. 3 Likes |
| Re: Getting Married Without A Job by Nobody: 11:22pm On Sep 04, 2012 |
Iyaqueen: Hello dear, I leave in d England,no paper if u know Wat I mean,but I still try to send stuff home to sell so sometin can still come in,we ladies like to buy stuff,ll u be collecting every pences from him,hmmmmmm he ll complain one day,just 1 day Ehrrrm what are you doing in a foreign country without any job? Your own case is preventative and self-caused one. |
| Re: Getting Married Without A Job by sexkillzmumu: 11:38pm On Sep 04, 2012 |
y2kaustin: Can anyone tell me,Why Igbo ladies marry at old age?And they r ugly.ur question reeks of stupidity 2 Likes |
| Re: Getting Married Without A Job by Gabrielsylar(m): 11:39pm On Sep 04, 2012 |
Some people have problems but wants solutions while some have solutions and instead of thanking baba God, they are soliciting for problems....ur primary role as a wife is to love ur husband n give him intimacy......wat is ur obsession ,why are u trying to force him to depend on ur help or support......o ga ooooo |
| Re: Getting Married Without A Job by kpolli(m): 11:58pm On Sep 04, 2012 |
ur parents nko? |
| Re: Getting Married Without A Job by GboyegaD(m): 12:16am On Sep 05, 2012 |
Madam, all I would also advice is try to ensure he does not spend too much on the wedding trying to impress so that you guys do not find yourself in a mess from the beginning of your marriage as this may make him resent you and act insultively because you do not have a job. |
| Re: Getting Married Without A Job by somebodybobo: 12:25am On Sep 05, 2012 |
scribble: Fogerritttttttt bros  ..If it were to be the guy, would she have married him?? Bone jor |
| Re: Getting Married Without A Job by Nobody: 12:36am On Sep 05, 2012 |
Young lady, go ahead with your wedding and get a job as soon as the honey moon is over. If not, when your husband is broke, if he does, he will turn you to a punching bag, and we @ nairaland will still be here to advise you no doubts  |
| Re: Getting Married Without A Job by iamtheprincipal: 12:55am On Sep 05, 2012 |
Ujujoan: @UjuJoan; I just want to appreciate you for your great words of advice. I wish all ladies (with the exception of a very few like you) reason like you, things would have been easy for us. |
| Re: Getting Married Without A Job by Nobody: 1:05am On Sep 05, 2012 |
Ujujoan:take this counsel 1 Like |
| Re: Getting Married Without A Job by armyofone(m): 1:43am On Sep 05, 2012 |
Also make sure either of you use birth control. both of you can manage as you both pursue your dreams. |
| Re: Getting Married Without A Job by Nobody: 2:06am On Sep 05, 2012 |
. 1 Like |
| Re: Getting Married Without A Job by NEROSKY(m): 2:12am On Sep 05, 2012 |
beqs101: Hello people helo, are u a blogger! |
| Re: Getting Married Without A Job by brabus(m): 3:23am On Sep 05, 2012 |
beqs101: My Sister bikonu...GO and LOOK for a JOB or start a trade!!! Don't say nobody warned you...cause when your hubby's eyes opens and he start resenting you for draining his financial resources and making no contribution to your family welfare we will hear another story. Your conscience is already giving you warning signals. Ignore at your peril. Question: What if your husband loses his job shortly after the wedding? Get a job. Get a life! |
| Re: Getting Married Without A Job by 2mch(m): 3:24am On Sep 05, 2012 |
Wow, Musiwa. Nice advice there, minus the video.  OP, Am sure you can sit down and make future plans with your fiancee. Pls try to have something doing even if you are not working. If it is going to school at least. Just find something that will keep you busy. You retain some respect that way. |
| Re: Getting Married Without A Job by yankidelta(m): 3:26am On Sep 05, 2012 |
y2kaustin: Can anyone tell me,Why Igbo ladies marry at old age?And they r ugly. I knew silly peeps like you will trivialize and tribalize this thread...I feel like calling you an Idiot but one as bigoted as you are has no shame and understanding for you is at best myopic. @ MOD pls do something here. |
| Re: Getting Married Without A Job by elimokhai(m): 4:23am On Sep 05, 2012 |
Please get a job as fast as you can even if the pay is little, you’ll always earn your respect in the house, it keeps marriage stronger. Don’t just feed fat on your husband, he’ll never respect you. You didn’t get that education only to become a stay at home mom. Soon you’ll start making kids which makes it more difficult for job haunting, each child you have keeps you in the house for 12months year, you keep procrastinating, and you’ll end up thinking of opening a shop, trading turkey and food stuffs whereas you had a dream of becoming a top executive in a multinational, Nigeria mentality. If your husband doesn’t see that zeal in you as it were during courtship, marriage will always crumble. You want to buy maggi, it’s your husband, toothpaste, and it’s your husband. He sees you as burden, the beauty start fading away, you start getting FAT, and love diminishes, cheating start taking place. This is not what you want, please get a job, yes even before marriage, don't be deceived 1 Like |
| Re: Getting Married Without A Job by Truckpusher(m): 4:30am On Sep 05, 2012 |
Bad market |
| Re: Getting Married Without A Job by dayokanu(m): 5:07am On Sep 05, 2012 |
OP. How much does your husband make per month? If he has a lot of money then you can go ahead but if he is the average worker, You better shelve the marriage for at least a year. Imagine Husband making 50-70k a month and wife no job. It wont be long before money for soup becomes an issue especially when you start having children Personally I wont do it and I think it isnt wise to marry a woman without any income, If your husband lose his job what happens? I have a friend and classmate who married in December 2009 and lost his job with Intercontinental Bank in Feb 2010 during the banking Tsunami. The wife had no job. The guy said he wished he didnt make that decision |
| Re: Getting Married Without A Job by Nobody: 5:08am On Sep 05, 2012 |
I am of the opinion that a marriage where responsibility is one sided can not last. No matter how little, make sure you have a steady source of income independent of your husband. |
| Re: Getting Married Without A Job by AdeniyiA(m): 6:14am On Sep 05, 2012 |
i can marry a lady who has no job but possesses skills that can make her to be self employed. a good wife material shud be good in at least 3 crafts or handicrafts. i would advice parents to make sure their children(boys and girls) acquire skills or crafts during long holidays instead of enrolling them in tutorial centres. western education seems not adequate for survival in Nigeria of today 1 Like |
| Re: Getting Married Without A Job by Dosopseh26: 6:22am On Sep 05, 2012 |
my dear, their are so amny ways to assists ur man is not only financially. if u can concentrat well on doing the home job sincerely, ur husband will be satisfied and God will surely bless you. |
| Re: Getting Married Without A Job by Andrew3(m): 6:56am On Sep 05, 2012 |
You dont have to worry yourself, taking care of you is his marital responsibility\ so even if you decide to help you are only doing him a favour. |
| Re: Getting Married Without A Job by God2man(m): 7:13am On Sep 05, 2012 |
Dosopseh26: my dear, their are so amny ways to assists ur man is not only financially. if u can concentrat well on doing the home job sincerely, ur husband will be satisfied and God will surely bless you. The unexpected will always happen, what i mean is that there is no marriage that is so perfect, the important thing is to make up for your inadequacy and be a good wife, your relationship with God will go a long way to help your marriage, pray constantly to God for a better Job, plan together with your husband and suggest what you can do to keep you busy. I do not think, it should stop the wedding bell. God bless you. God2man. |
| Re: Getting Married Without A Job by RuuDie(m): 7:15am On Sep 05, 2012 |
pro01: You never know. . .the prospective hubby might well fall in that category; albeit without the jobless - he might not be as financially buoyant as he or they both think. This is the bane of most average naija men. . .not ever being able to tell when we are ready in terms of the money. Most just take blind risks! Ah well, @ OP, all the best!!! |
| Re: Getting Married Without A Job by beqs101(f): 7:22am On Sep 05, 2012 |
EXCELLENCE Abia: you are going to be embarrassed with job but never forget to testify Thanks and i won't forget to testify. |
| Re: Getting Married Without A Job by dammytosh: 7:32am On Sep 05, 2012 |
That you are not bringing money does not mean u are not adding to the family. I prefer a wife holding the house than a 50k per month salary earner. If u take extreme good care of the house and make sure everything is in place, he should place u on salary as if he empoyed some one to do dt for him. After your marriage just try as much as possible : 1. Do not nag. 2. Do not conclude that everything happening in d house was as a result of u not having a job. 3. Do not leave things undone while watching dstv. 4. Be diligent, 5. Keep fit and don't explode (fat) 6. Use this time to read about being a wife and parenting 7. Time to give birth to ur first child. 8. Pick interest in whatever he is interested in d little time he spends at home. You watching superstory when Real Madrid is playing Barcelona will add to d time ur man will spend outside d home. 9. Be extra patient and dnt be unnecessarily sensitive.(that he has really changed thinking) 10. Time to know more about what he likes. Imagine u chatting ur baby dt is a politics freak and analyzing Michelle Obama's speech or u being the first to tell him Michael Essien has moved to Real Madrid. The list continues ............ More about financing shortly. - My Opinion. . 3 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: Getting Married Without A Job by Bintu4: 7:53am On Sep 05, 2012 |
Even wants 2 marry hijab sister about 2 finish nysc, we stay in lag but dont know what to set up 4 her but dont want her 2 b looking 4 job dt is not there and consider her dress, discrimination issue but i luv her 2 much. What can i do? |
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