coogar:

so if it takes 10 yrs, she can sit back n do nothing for 10 yrs? come on, be realistic..... she doesn't have to be in a 9-5 to make income. there are plenty of stuff she can be doing by the side to make ends meet!



wait for 5 yrs to get a job? na chevron job? no wonder the average nigerian marriage is hubris these days. why wait 5 yrs to get a N50,000 per month job? this is nigeria we are talking about with no job security - let her go into business and make income instead of waiting forever at home piling up adipose tissues!

which business?which money

Its very easy for folks to say. . .

I have Gambian neighbours some of whom still practice the old, original tradition of "housewife-ship" - as in the woman does absolutely nothing but stay in and take care of the home-front. . .no exaggeration; she doesn't do anything to generate any form of stipend, nothing to develop herself, just the domestic stuff and depends on her husband for everything else.

You don't want to be in this position when the man is not around and some urgent need has to be catered for. . .trust me, you don't!

RuuDie: Its very easy for folks to say. . .

I have Gambian neighbours some of whom still practice the old, original tradition of "housewife-ship" - as in the woman does absolutely nothing but stay in and take care of the home-front. . .no exaggeration; she doesn't do anything to generate any form of stipend, nothing to develop herself, just the domestic stuff and depends on her husband for everything else.

You don't want to be in this position when the man is not around and some urgent need has to be catered for. . .trust me, you don't!

No be only you. When I was in NYSC. The principal of the school I served had multiple wives and the wives were like you described 100% dependent.

The Principal would just tell them he wants to travel for 3 days, give them money for food for 3 days and spend a week or two. The money would have finished by the 5th day max, and they would be sending their kids (principals kids) to go to corpers to beg for Oil, for kerosene for salt for maggi.

Later they would go around practically begging other teachers also living in the quarters for food.

Marrying a spouse without a job is risky for both parties

AdeniyiA: i can marry a lady who has no job but possesses skills that can make her to be self employed. a good wife material shud be good in at least 3 crafts or handicrafts.
i would advice parents to make sure their children(boys and girls) acquire skills or crafts during long holidays instead of enrolling them in tutorial centres.
western education seems not adequate for survival in Nigeria of today

I will suggest at higher institution, because most of the young ones learning one craft or the other at secondary school level dont always concentrate on their studies. They would have concluded that, that is what they will finally end up doing for a living.

Bintu4: Even wants 2 marry hijab sister about 2 finish nysc, we stay in lag but dont know what to set up 4 her but dont want her 2 b looking 4 job dt is not there and consider her dress, discrimination issue but i luv her 2 much.

What can i do?

I would have advised you, but this post was in 2012 and this is 2014, so I know you must have taken a decision.

SenatorJames: I will suggest at higher institution, because most of the young ones learning one craft or the other at secondary school level dont always concentrate on their studies. They would have concluded that, that is what they will finally end up doing for a living.

You can only bend a fish when it's still wet or soft