Hi guys, there was a funny american joke I remember, and I thought it would be cool if we did the nigerian version.
Its easy, just name a place in naija and give us their infamous style of driving.
I'll start.


Lagos- one hand on the steering wheel, one hand on the horn, screaming at the top of his lungs, ''kilode! Olori buruku ni ye! See u! You wah-wah pass vulture intestine''.

Onitsha- one hand on the steering wheel, one hand on the loud speaker, shouting ''come and buy ya otapiapia, ya garberdine material, ya electronics, anything you need I get am, even if na wife u dey look for I get am for my van''.

Jos- one hand on the steering wheel, one hand on a bomb, mumbling, ''walahi! I must taste those my virgins tonight''.

Akwa Ibom- both legs on the steering wheel, arms and head relaxed on seat, saying with a smile and closed eyes ''hmmm..the uncommon relaxation''.

Flood affected areas- one hand on the steering wheel, one hand with a padel, padeling heavily and saying with clenched teeth, ''u dis water, na me and you today''.

Aluu village- both hands on the steering wheel, both legs on the accelerator, almost shedding tears and saying ''Chai! Na who beg me make I pass dis place o''. The radio blares with ''this world is not my home, I'm just a passer by''




Please do not take offence at any of these, its just for fun.
Now you try yours.

Ilorin: one alfa's hand on the steering, the other holding an islamic rosary, a pretty aladja beside him, radio blasting labaeka's song, both going to asalatu.....

The poster's village,one hand on the steering,and the other on his joystick,jerking

Danfo driver in oshodi- one hand out the door, the other hand with igbo, smoking.

salam001: The poster's village,one hand on the steering,and the other on his joystick,jerking

You just described what u do whenever u drive.

barefootbandit:

You just described what u do whenever u drive.

WRONG wenever i drive,i concerntrate on it unlike you,self-servicer!!!

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salam001: WRONG wenever i drive,i concerntrate on it unlike you,self-servicer!!!

My friend please this is the jokes section. Its not a place to get angry unnessarily and insult people, its a place to give and be given joy.
I wrote this with a good heart and with no bad intentions but if u have somehow taken offence, then I apologise.

Back to the main stuff, is there anybody ready to be creative and funny?t

You've spoken well son,now you have my permission to do whatever you wish on nairaland