Hello guys, this is my 1st topic on nairaland, hope people respond to it
I had a waking thought about 4 days ago, and I want to share it

If you were given these 2 options below, and you absolutely had to choose I, which would it be-

1. You get married, have a dream wedding, the best ring, possessions, etc....but you are NOT in love, BUT, your feelings may or not change with time, and yes, the guy is good looking, and there will be no divorce, and you must live together, kids may or may not be there...( remember, you can grow to love or loathe this guy o)....people envy you, but do not know the true state...remember, social doors are opened to you here, etc

2. You have a dream love affair, the stuff of movies, the guy lives in same town, reciprocates your feelings, you are in love, and would want all to know...BUT, you CANNOT get married, in fact NO ONE knows you are in a relationship, they offer to hook you up with people, look at you with derision, pity or whatever. (Remember you are in love and this relationship is for as long as you are alive, BUT no one knows, no marriage, some social doors are shut to you, etc)

I know it is theoretical, probably implausible, but think on it and let me know...
Total honesty required please...it does not matter if you are currently married/single, happy or not...no rationalising allowed

I posted this because I asked 1 of my 2 best friends and our answers differed
The other best friend said she won't answer cos I have become even more fanciful since joining nairaland...that I should face my dissertation instead
I agree, but this question has been niggling at me like tomorrow no dey

Thank you all

Someone may want to know our choices
I chose number 2, and my friend chose number 1
Swear down...we really chose differently
Cheers

Difficult decision, but will go with #2.

Yield: Difficult decision, but will go with #2.

true story eh!
not easy at all

I hope we get more responses..
.maybe we would have a poll?
I want to let my friend know there is no right answer here...she thinks there is!

Dis is exorcism not a question..... Lol

Like you mean I am possessed or what?
I wish you would be clearer......
but thanks for commenting....

I really thought people would be involved...oh well
next time/topic maybe....

none

Well... If I were faced with this it would really have a toll on me as I would be between Scylla and Charybdis... This is so because both have lagging disadvantages. Anywayz, the latter alternative will be more preferred..

No 2.
And this topic is somewhat silly

Number 1

I know it is silly, but you agree it is mind- boggling as well right?
Maybe we should allow rationalising, to enable us think it through...

I am happy @ UnamericanGirl chose option 1....
siblings opine differently on this, friends too
means there is no one right way to see issues

Very tough one...hmmm... I will go with 1.

Hello

Happy new month to everyone
You know, when I made this topic, I honestly thought it would be thought provoking and would garner a lot of interest or soul searching
I guess the feeling was all in my head....

But I really wish people would mull over the topic and try to answer....
It is not simple, I have come to realise...
Cos I brought it up at work, and the varying responses and the, yes, almost quarrels that arose from the topic no be small thing...
Research able, as we say at work
I will keep hoping for more replies....and yes, the responses could make one different from people of otherwise similar interests
So I think it is a nice topic that would help in self-identification,?realisation

I believe this topic is not unimportant, however silly it may appear

( thanks to those who replied.....)
Hope to hear from you all
Thanks, cheers

Well, I don't have any contribution, just want to say the OP writes really well, the kind of female, I want to know.

imas: Well, I don't have any contribution, just want to say the OP writes really well, the kind of female, I want to know.

I wil just accept that this my thread will not start any thought provocation and soul searching
(Face palm)

Btw....thanks

milychocs:


I wil just accept that this my thread will not start any thought provocation and soul searching
(Face palm)

Btw....thanks

maybe you need to edit, and then drive traffic to the thread, I see people trying to drive traffic to their thread every now and then on other threads, and it works.

imas:
maybe you need to edit, and then drive traffic to the thread, I see people trying to drive traffic to their thread every now and then on other threads, and it works.

Nah...that is a long ago thread....
Do not care about it anymore

Was just surprised someone saw it
Would delete it if I knew how to
Cheers...and thanks
Bye

Search

@ Blastfinito.....take care, and be happy

[quote author=milychocs post=32466325]@ Blastfinito...send me you

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Hmm... actually this is a mind-boggling topic. I can imagine it generating arguments between friends or siblings. I think, once one understands the impossibility of having the best of both worlds, it's easy to settle into an option.

As a pragmatist, I'd gladly choose option 1. Knowing fully well i won't have to be happy for the rest of my life, i can dedicate my time to other noble pursuits with my money that will guarantee some measure of delight. I don't see myself as someone keen on everlasting joy and happiness or on mushy marriage feelings that may not even last long anyways. So, I settle for the comfort/certainty option 1 brings.

Looking at it, most realists will choose option 1. Sensitive or emotional people are more likely to go for option 2. They think mostly with their hearts and not their heads.

Mynd44:
No 2.
And this topic is somewhat silly

I wonder why I liked this post!?

goofyone:
Hmm... actually this is a mind-boggling topic. I can imagine it generating arguments between friends or siblings. I think, once one understands the impossibility of having the best of both worlds, it's easy to settle into an option.

As a pragmatist, I'd gladly choose option 1. Knowing fully well i won't have to be happy for the rest of my life, i can dedicate my time to other noble pursuits with my money that will guarantee some measure of delight. I don't see myself as someone keen on everlasting joy and happiness or on mushy marriage feelings that may not even last long anyways. So, I settle for the comfort/certainty option 1 brings.

Looking at it, most realists will choose option 1. Sensitive or emotional people are more likely to go for option 2. They think mostly with their hearts and not their heads.

Yeah, I am as impulsive as air!
True story....think with my heart..

......but I honestly do not know how else to think
I even feel it is not possible to choose option one

Stubborn, and flighty ehn?
SMH....@ me

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Please who can tell me how to delete this thread?
Thanks

milychocs:
@ Blastfinito....you may delete your details...copied
Cheers

Ok.

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milychocs:

Phew! U almost spoilt me. Thanks.

milychocs:
@

Suffice it to say that...

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