In religious gatherings, it is normal 2 find pple at their best behaviors. I am trying to have an understanding.

I like the challenging life, I go in for a kill and if I come out alive,I feel replenished,rejuvenated (parable). I like to challenge and be challenged so in the long run,am better for it.

I have seen on this forum that when arguments ensue between people,others just want them to lie low,be cool.

I Know that is very easy to be but it just may not be enough for some peolple.

So I was wondering,is this a part of Islam people are trying to uphold or are they just being cynical of the people who want it hot?

Are we afraid of losing it to others? Or is there something that we want protected?


disclaimer-I am only talking of muslim-muslim discussions.

So you started a thread to attack vedaxcool! That is not nice! Anyway just kidding!

I need clarification on what cool is, I am a bit confused on what cool you are talking about, is it cool as in being level headed or cool as in wanting to conform to others expectation!

vedaxcool: So you started a thread to attack vedaxcool! That is not nice! Anyway just kidding!

I need clarification on what cool is, I am a bit confused on what cool you are talking about, is it cool as in being level headed or cool as in wanting to conform to others expectation!

What do u thnk of both

What does going in for the kill mean exactly?

As Muslims we argue with the best of manners with other Muslims. Remember we are not trying to be right,we are trying to get the truth.

If your goal when arguing with a Muslim is to get the truth then there is no need to lose your cool.

I remember watching a debate between two scholars, it reminded of why we are supposed to be the best nation raised for humanity. You could see that it wasn't about being correct, it was about what is the truth.

Sometimes we argue just to boost our egos, it becomes an ego contest, this is a big problem islamically. You might feel great to win a debate of egos but did you walk away with truth or just an inflated ego.

Religious discussions are not challenges. They are a quest for truth and if anotherhas better evidences,we accept them.

I remember a saying by imam shafi where he said that he gets into religious debates hoping he is wrong so that he can learn. (I will look for the exact quote later in sha Allah).

I do not know if this addresses the topic but I hope it is of benefit. And Allah knows best.

When I wrote going for the kill,I put parable in bracket and that is even a general life principle.

Here, What it literally means is that I challenge my supposed understanding of something.

And whether it goes in favor of me or otherwise,I feel better for it.


I dont know why pple wldnt want such surfacing when it is presumed as getting hot.

This is probably my last thread on this forum and yh! this was about me, again!

I wish people would say whatever they have in mind but I can bet many would not. There has to be a reason for that. Maybe not being blunt is Islamic

I was on phone the other time. Now I see the need to disect this post

tbaba1234: What does going in for the kill mean exactly?

I dont know what figure of speech that is, but I meant it as the way I live my life normally. I get bored easily and ginger it by doing what many people wouldn't do. I challenge status quo but I try to do those things the Islamic way as best as I can. I am aware of consequences, facing them when they surface only make me stronger and then I go for bigger ones.

As Muslims we argue with the best of manners with other Muslims. Remember we are not trying to be right,we are trying to get the truth.

I must have said this same thing more than thrice on this forum. I only argue when I have some knowledge of the matter. I naturally just expect people to give up. if they dont, I shldnt be expected to especially when they haven't convinced me they are right. WHo would I have been trying to impress by winning an argument here? I am not the type that cares about impressing people. The only people who need to be impressed are the members of my family and they bombard me wv enough endearments already.

If your goal when arguing with a Muslim is to get the truth then there is no need to lose your cool.

oh! here we come! you are implying being cool is the right thing and it shouldn't be lost. What about people who are not naturally cool. I have been cool once in my life but I stopped being that. I would want to know why I need to keep being cool. Some people just naturally have these raw nerves and you cant feel it even over the computers.

I remember watching a debate between two scholars, it reminded of why we are supposed to be the best nation raised for humanity. You could see that it wasn't about being correct, it was about what is the truth.

Sometimes we argue just to boost our egos, it becomes an ego contest, this is a big problem islamically. You might feel great to win a debate of egos but did you walk away with truth or just an inflated ego.

thank you for this.I totally agree with what you said. But in my case, I am sure I don't need Nl as an ego booster. Maybe I shldnt have taken too much of those self esteem courses

Religious discussions are not challenges. They are a quest for truth and if another has better evidences,we accept them.

Religious discussions can be challenging especially when they push you to learn more about your deen. I have learnt a lot by being here. I have been challenged to learn more about the deen. that is one of the reasons Nl is now boring to me. the challenges are now less. We are more concerned with people saying ma shaa Allah, you have done well to people challenging our faith and how we practice it. kudos to d mod though.Again, I am only saying my mind.


And about the evidences, I have accepted a lot here. like d discussion with Beta things on how much anyone has to do to get into al jannah. when I realsied he was right, I admitted it. So again, it is not about being right all the time.

I remember a saying by imam shafi where he said that he gets into religious debates hoping he is wrong so that he can learn. (I will look for the exact quote later in sha Allah).

that is it in my case too. or sometimes, so others can be wrong and change their ways like on that thread of Muslim men and their women. I was deliberately challenging the practices I see in Nigerian Muslim men so we could all learn from it.

I do not know if this addresses the topic but I hope it is of benefit. And Allah knows best.

Yes, it is. thank you.

I hope this is enough synopsis into my mind,the way I think and why I act in certain ways.

For all of the time I have been here, I say alhamdulillah!


the few friends I have made, I hope to keep and the ones I have ignored, I hope would forgive me. I am not too good at certain things as honoring calls to friendship.

If there is anyone I have offended in anyway, I can only hope that they'd forgive me.oh, pls doooo.
It is the tradition of the prophet to do this. I hope all of our actions here are for us and not against us on yaoum al qiyaama..Amin.


will check if anyone replies this until d wind blows me off of here

Where are you going? Ki lode?

I don't like goodbyes!

Well, you are correct ... people are different.

We have to learn to deal with different personalities.

Later.

deols u are a bundle of passion and emotions. why will you make an emotional decision like not posting on nl again just like dat. if na play stop am o. some of us benefit a lot from your posts to just accept that.

to answer your question. no., being cool or temperamental is not Islamic. Islam is following the Quran and the sunnah to the best of one's ability. imagine a world where everyone was the same. so people have to be different. we have Abu Bakr(the truthful, and loyal), and then we have Umar(who established the Islamic state). we also have Fatima(the resplendent one), and we have Aisha(who transmitted several hadith). the above pairs had contrasted characters, yet each was an excellent Muslim.

a person may be "cool" in a particular situation and go against the sunnah. another person may be expressive or outspoken in another situation and still be wrong in the light of the sunnah. may Allah lead us to the balanced way, and He knows best.

deols:

What do u thnk of both

Well on the first, I think it is great being level headed that is cool headed when discussing/ arguing with others, but truly sometimes fire must reply fire!

On the second, I think when it comes to defending religion, we should owe nobody any apology for what we believe, especially the core of our beliefs, we owe no one any apologies. Any muslims that wants to be cool to appease kafirs and non muslims alike should have his Imam examined!

“Never do I debate a man with a desire to hear him err in his speech, or to expose the flaws in his argument, and thus vanquish him. Whenever I face an opponent in debate I silently supplicate, ‘O Lord, help him so that truth may manifest itself in his heart and on his tongue. If it be that the truth is on my side, may he follow me; and if the truth be on his side, may I follow him.’”

Imam al-Shafi‘i

And another bites the dust.....


Deols this dosen't have to be your last thread, we do argue to reconcile.

Although most peeps believe we should "tone" it down which might seem like "Pretending" to some while some believe thats the way a muslim should be.But one thing about online forums is that we all have different ways of reacting to different things . So even when pissed just let it pass...

Have had friends in here, Call and cry on the phone because of someone having a contrary idea to theirs and fighting it dirty.. I hope i didn't derail the threa.

On a lighter note.

10th to comment Just kidding.


@doels ...so when do you respond to my post in here ...

https://www.nairaland.com/751801/muslim-singles-let-us-talk/79#13218973

my bro i don't think so.

people have different personalities.

If there was one person I would have wanted to have as a friend on the forum that person would sure be Deols. Girl, I love your wisdom and knowledge of tackling critical issues.

To the topic, I might be wrong, I might flare tempers but I feel the reason why most Muslim Youths can't hold 'constructive' argument or critical discussions is because they either lack good knowledge of the discussion at hand or feel to timid to want to be heard. Our youths do not read, and the few ones who do kind of easily forget History so I feel they would rather hide under the excuse that their religion frowns at arguments or wanting to air their opinion that try to make a push to win their grounds on the discussion at hand.

go nd ask alfa mi

tbaba1234: What does going in for the kill mean exactly?

As Muslims we argue with the best of manners with other Muslims. Remember we are not trying to be right,we are trying to get the truth.

If your goal when arguing with a Muslim is to get the truth then there is no need to lose your cool.

I remember watching a debate between two scholars, it reminded of why we are supposed to be the best nation raised for humanity. You could see that it wasn't about being correct, it was about what is the truth.

Sometimes we argue just to boost our egos, it becomes an ego contest, this is a big problem islamically. You might feel great to win a debate of egos but did you walk away with truth or just an inflated ego.

Religious discussions are not challenges. They are a quest for truth and if anotherhas better evidences,we accept them.

I remember a saying by imam shafi where he said that he gets into religious debates hoping he is wrong so that he can learn. (I will look for the exact quote later in sha Allah).

I do not know if this addresses the topic but I hope it is of benefit. And Allah knows best.

Nice one, Tbaba.

Etched on marble.

.

deols: This is probably my last thread on this forum and yh! this was about me, again!

I wish people would say whatever they have in mind but I can bet many would not. There has to be a reason for that. Maybe not being blunt is Islamic

What exactly is happening? Is there a story behind this thread I'm missing?

I knew a brother while in the university in Nigeria. When he preached, he was very passionate, he had a pretty strong voice too. So of course, if and when he argued, he didn't come across as '"cool".

However, a few thing I noticed about this brother were
1. He allowed the dissenting individual to have his say ( even if they had a cool voice)
2. He was not verbally abusive or disrespectful
3. He always ended his submission with a reminder of the topic at hand ( i.e., he never got personal or emotional, it was always about knowledge of Islam)
4. He was the gentlest giant when he spoke to the sisters. I fell for him but he was already taken


I hope this provides another way of looking at "not cool"

deols: When I wrote going for the kill,I put parable in bracket and that is even a general life principle.

Here, What it literally means is that I challenge my supposed understanding of something.

And whether it goes in favor of me or otherwise,I feel better for it.


I dont know why pple wldnt want such surfacing when it is presumed as getting hot.

My dearest deols. Dont go. Dont allow shaitan allow u to stop your gud acts .U have educated many ignorant ones the truth about Islam. If u back out now, The muslim ummah on nairaland has lost a gem. U might av your reason, I respect you decision. I WILL MISS U. I WISH U SUCCESS IN YOUR ENDEAVOURS. sobs

Hypocratical silence and carlously cool. Even when faceless some cannot stand and defend their number 1. When infidel say wrong about what you are created for, you keep cool does that tag you gentle nop.
If anybody wan2fvck with your deen,dont keep it cool.

In an injustice society, silence is nothing but a crime

A good Muslim should always be cool and not fool.

@sholly, dont bring this ur campaign thing into the religion section
@deols, i might never have a discussion with you but it'll surprise you to knw u, mac, and jarus have done some 1daful things to me and some odas lyk me s faith and i hop to stil gain more islamic knwledge from the NL religion section mashaallah. PLS, DONT LEAVE...

@sholly, dont bring this ur campaign thing into the religion section
@deols, i might never have a discussion with you but it'll surprise you to knw u, mac, and jarus have done some 1daful things to me and some odas lyk me s faith and i hop to stil gain more islamic knwledge from the NL religion section mashaallah. PLS, DONT LEAVE... As a good muslim, do nt give up on others because sum1's got hurted.

laykhorn: @sholly, dont bring this ur campaign thing into the religion section.

Sorry about that