ms.anon:
I'm an avid reader of the family section on Nairaland and would have continued reading topics and people's views on issues i can relate to until i realized that could only do so much so i decided to come outright with my issue.

I found out that my boyfriend of over 2 years cheated on me.. barely 3 months after i traveled out of the country no less. I had that gut feeling but he swore time and time again that he was completely faithful and made me feel i was being paranoid. I was shattered after i found out. completely broken. His sister that used to vouch for him told me that just cos he had a one night stand doesn't mean he doesn't love me. He's been under a lot of pressure to get married and on one of the occasions he traveled to see his parents, his dad brought a lady for him to marry and his parent know me and that i exist. H's told them that i'm the one he wants to get married to but that didn't stop his dad. He didn't tell me. he stayed back one more day to meet her. His sister mentioned it when she was trying to prove a point. He had absolutely no plans to tell me that.

Now, he wants to get married. I don't know if i can look past his cheating. he claimed it was once btw. I know it'll slow me down but i'm not sure if i should compromise.. meet him halfway. The fact that he cheated though. I'm not exactly sure what i'm asking you guys though. I guess i just need somebody to talk to. I'm confused and don't want to take this into the new year. It's done enough damage in 2012. I would edit and ask specific questions when i can think straight. Sorry i'm rambling. My mind's everywhere at the moment.

maryini: Hi ms.anon. Sorry to derail.

Is this the same guy that offered to pay your school fees? Did he eventually pay?

maryini: Hi ms.anon. Sorry to derail.

Is this the same guy that offered to pay your school fees? Did he eventually pay?

greatgod2012: @ op, are you talking about d same guy here? https://www.nairaland.com/1009265/getting-married-without-financial-security#11684100

maryini: You must really love him because I can see from your posts whenever you seem to want to end the relationship you keep holding on hoping he'll change.

I can't make the decision for you but from the little you've said about him things are not looking too good. I'ld advice you to go with your instinct as I've come to realise over time it is usually right.

Hope you've been able to resolve your fees issue?

Callotti: Where are you gonna find the one that will not cheat?
Abi nor be Nigerian man again?
Abeg, before or after marriage. . .THEY WILL ALL CHEAT!
Just learn to cheat back! Period.
The devil you know is better than the DEMON you do not know!
All those ones swearing up and down they will not cheat are the MOST DECEPTIVE OF ALL.

The fact that a man or WOMAN cheats has ABSOLUTELY nothing to do with not loving a spouse.
Relationships get stale FAST!

He was only looking for 'small breeeeeeze' to 'blow' him! callotti, I'm all for being happy. At this point, that's all. If I would derive any sort of joy cheating on him, I probably would. I've been unhappy for way to long. Happiness is all I want. He's not made me happy in a long time and that was why I made this thread. Will cheating ensure my happiness? Or just make me sadder and lonelier? Therein lies the question. Thanks for your comment.

As for feeling 'shattered'. . . You nefa start o! You berra develop SUPER-DUPER-THICK-SKIN!