Morayo747: Classic case of arguing for arguments sake. Are you some rookie lawyer trying to horn her skills here? We all know lawyers argue even when they know they are wrong.

Proove what I said is wrong or shut up and stop exposing your foolishness.

kai...who be this fellis? you too go school o.

Morayo747: Classic case of arguing for arguments sake. Are you some rookie lawyer trying to horn her skills here? We all know lawyers argue even when they know they are wrong.

That girl is not worth the arguement brov.you don't need to knw some people before you knw the kinda family they cm frm.A family where the Mum competes with the dad.even tells the dad to shutup and he does.

fellis:

Proove what I said is wrong or shut up and stop exposing your foolishness.

You are too much jare. I'm quite impressed. The guy clearly does not have much sense which is why his weak points are making me wince. He really should shut up and not expose his foolishness more than he has one already. No logical reasoning ability at all.

Jesus vs the pharisees in the synagogue...

bunmila:
You are too much jare. I'm quite impressed.

ayztech: kai...who be this fellis? you too go school o.

Thank you, thank you, thank you

Chaiiii, am a Man bt dis Fellis is givin guys here tough tym wit her sensible argument. Go on gal, i support u. A wife bearin d husby family is a white tradition dat we are force on to assimilate. Religiously, d woman shld bear her father's name even if she get married.

Double194: #singing# U can`t turn a LovePeddler to a house-wife, that's for sure.......

the same way you cannot turn a pathetic and frustrated misogynist to a rational and normal thinking human being.smh,i wonder whether you were one of her customers.am sure you gave her your money in exchange of sex.oponu,ode alara galatia!

ayztech: kai...who be this fellis? you too go school o.

i am telling you.when you see an intelligent lady,its not difficult to notice.intelligent ladies make me happy and impressed as opposed to a subservient,bimbo like and yes sir woman.obviously the dudes here have no substance to back their arguements hence resort to personality attacks (typical of them anyway) any woman who is opposed to their school of thought or opposed to following their stewpeed sterotype is quickly labelled a feminist,victim of heart break or frustrated woman.i am not suprised though.keep it up fellis.your arguements hold weight.dont let any man allow his superiority or inferiority complex make you who you are not meant to be.thumbs up girl.and for the records any man here or wherever on nairaland is free to call me a feminist or whatever,so be it.i really like and respect women like fellis

@kulyie, Abeg sofri praise me so that my head will not burst
But seriously it is very annoying when I see some people following a certain way of life because it favors them and not bothering to find out whether what they are doing is right or wrong.
This culture of women bearing their husbands' names only serves to make women look like property that have no identity of their own. Things like this encourage the sexist attitudes we see in men and the inferiority complex a lot of women are suffering from today that keeps them from believing that they can attain great heights if they want to and are not simply baby-making and house cleaning machines.

[quote author=fellis]
Hahaha
E dey pain you?
Is it paining you that I said women are not supposed to bear their husbands' names?
Make e pain you well well you hear? Truth will always remain the truth. It is not a command by God for women to bear husbands name. It is not in your Bible yet you men want the tradition to remain because you want to lie to yourselves that you are superior to women and they are your property. Fools.[/quote

Am a proud African woman not a man and i have seen ur other comments. I think what u would have said is that women shud include their surnames to their martial name and not throw their off their father name after all he has done for them all in the name of marriage quoting the bible in Gen 2 verse 22 THEN THE RIB WHICH THE LORD GOD HAD TAKEN FROM MAN HE MADE INTO A WOMAN,AND HE BROUGHT HER TO THE MAN. If u understand that it means that she did nt neglect her name the "WO" is hers n the "MAN" is her husband's. QED. so adding ur father's name to ur marital name is approved. others who either dropped their surnames or added it to their marital are not fools and i don't think you are more vast or read than most of them. But that argument of urs is insane but however you can prove us all wrong by been the 1st strong woman ever to make her dear husband change his name to answer yours and you will be on GUINNESS WORLD RECORD AS LONG AS YOU LIVE.

[quote author=fellis]
Hahaha
E dey pain you?
Is it paining you that I said women are not supposed to bear their husbands' names?
Make e pain you well well you hear? Truth will always remain the truth. It is not a command by God for women to bear husbands name. It is not in your Bible yet you men want the tradition to remain because you want to lie to yourselves that you are superior to women and they are your property. Fools.[/quote

Am a proud African woman not a man and i have seen ur other comments. I think what u would have said is that women shud include their surnames to their martial name and not throw their off their father name after all he has done for them all in the name of marriage quoting the bible in Gen 2 verse 22 THEN THE RIB WHICH THE LORD GOD HAD TAKEN FROM MAN HE MADE INTO A WOMAN,AND HE BROUGHT HER TO THE MAN. If u understand that it means that she did nt neglect her name the "WO" is hers n the "MAN" is her husband's. QED. so adding ur father's name to ur marital name is approved. others who either dropped their surnames or added it to their marital are not fools and i don't think you are more vast or read than most of them. But that argument of urs is insane but however you can prove us all wrong by been the 1st strong woman ever to make her dear husband change his name to answer yours and you will be on GUINNESS WORLD RECORD AS LONG AS YOU LIVE.

fellis:
Hahaha
E dey pain you?
Is it paining you that I said women are not supposed to bear their husbands' names?
Make e pain you well well you hear? Truth will always remain the truth. It is not a command by God for women to bear husbands name. It is not in your Bible yet you men want the tradition to remain because you want to lie to yourselves that you are superior to women and they are your property. Fools.

Am a woman point of correction, been reading ur comments. I think ur points will hold water if u say women shud nt give up their father's name after marriage. Because i have been researching n discovered that those women who either added their father's name to their husband or did not at all are vast n more read than you. But nonetheless, you can break the gen by been the 1st strong woman to make her husband change his name and bear your. And believe me you will gain international audience n be sort after by press n maybe get d GUINNESS WORLD RECORD

@ fellis,

No need to fight, and for the record, let me answer your question directly,
Yes, men are so superior to women and that is a fact. Apart from the fact that men are stronger,
smarter, faster, and even bigger.
men have also been blessed by God and his son and only child himself. So it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks...


The fact that God is a male and that he has only one child and that child is also a male, is enough reason that male will forever rule....

No fighting... By the way, look everywhere around you.... Even the men are generally more accepted even by your fellow female folk that they(female) accept themselves...

Nevertheless, I think women on the other hand are catching up...

Do you want a free ticket to attend the Love Like a Movie Concert and See Kim Kardashian and other celebrities Live?

http://www.chinilive.com/2013/02/free-tickets-to-attend-love-like-movie.html

Secondly, it is very natural to call the man the head of the family
basically, because he provides and cares for the family(at least in most cases)
And on a second, note I believe the change of name is a first sign of commitment
of the wife to the husband....

God is great! And I can relate this commitment issue to the instinct God and his only son gave some animals
like lions.... When a prey is killed, the stronger lion/lioness eats first before the weaker.

This is necessary, if the pride must survive. Because the strong do most of the hunting.
Imagine a case where the weaker eats up all the food before the stronger, I guess there will be no food
left for the stronger lions to feed on before their next hunting which means they will fail and failure means death to the pride.

In same light, men and stronger than women. So the woman has to by fire by force lay low for the man if the home must stand. Two drivers cannot drive a car. You simply give the driving to the best and make the second to best an assistance. It is for the benefit of all....

But if you say women are strong than men or that they are equal, then you are not saying the truth,
nevertheless, should in case that is your believe, i guess a cage fight for you and I will judge

anonymoux: Secondly, it is very natural to call the man the head of the family
basically, because he provides and cares for the family(at least in most cases)
And on a second, note I believe the change of name is a first sign of commitment
of the wife to the husband....

That is nothing but your belief. A woman can be committed to a man without bearing his name.
Abeg you people should stop annoying me with your inane arguments.
A woman also provides for and cares for the family, she bears children, breastfeeds them, takes care of them from infancy to adulthood, she also looks after the needs of the man, contributes financially to the home and cooks, cleans etc. Does that mean that men are supposed to bear their wives' names? Also, a woman can be committed to a man even if she does not bear his name, a person bearing another person's name is not a guarantee that they will stay committed to whoever's name they are bearing. Besides if this is the case then why can't men also bear their wives' names? Or is commitment in marriage something that is only important for women? Are men not also under obligation to be committed to their wives?

God is great!

I agree !

And I can relate this commitment issue to the instinct God and his only son gave some animals
like lions.... When a prey is killed, the stronger lion/lioness eats first before the weaker.This is necessary, if the pride must survive. Because the strong do most of the hunting.
Imagine a case where the weaker eats up all the food before the stronger, I guess there will be no foodleft for the stronger lions to feed on before their next hunting which means they will fail and failure means death to the pride.
In same light, men and stronger than women. So the woman has to by fire by force lay low for the man if the home must stand.

Don't bring animals into this matter because we are human beings and we are above animals. Animals are not our role models.
Animals are also cannibalistic and animals commit ince$t. Are human beings also supposed to commit ince$t and eat each other because animals do so?

Two drivers cannot drive a car. You simply give the driving to the best and make the second to best an assistance. It is for the benefit of all....

Marriage is not a car that one person has to drive. Marriage is an institution and in every institution,there MUST be understanding and cooperation between every member of the institution for there to be progress and for peace to reign. Whatever decision taken in a marriage should be one that all parties are okay with or one that they have all agreed to compromise and go along with. Simply put, marriage is about cooperation.
If only one spouse is having their way constantly in the name of being a leader there will definitely be discontent and dissatisfaction in the heart of the other spouse.
Husband and wife is not master and slave or controller and controlled.
Cooperation and mutual understanding must be present in a marriage for it to last.
But I am derailing so let me stop here.

But if you say women are strong than men or that they are equal, then you are not saying the truth,

You cannot judge superiority based on physical strength and you cannot say that men are stronger than women therefore they are superior to women. If that is the case, then the wild animals in the forest such as lions and crocodiles will be superior to men since those animals are physically stronger than men.

remecy: Am a proud African woman not a man and i have seen ur other comments. I think what u would have said is that women shud include their surnames to their martial name and not throw their off their father name after all he has done for them all in the name of marriage

Look, I am not saying women must do this or that. What I am saying is that it is not compulsory for a woman to bear her husband's name. There are women who want to bear their husband's names rather than their father's name and there are women who want to bear their father's names and husband's name with a hyphen seperating both names and there are women who want to bear only their father's names. It all depends on the woman and her choice. I am not saying everybody must follow my opinion. What I am saying is that IT IS NOT MANDATORY FOR A WOMAN TO BEAR HER HUSBAND'S NAME. That is the topic of the argument I have been making on this thread. Any woman can choose to keep her father's name and she can also choose to keep her husband's name. It is her choice and her life, no problem with that. Where a problem comes in is when men start claiming that women MUST bear their husband's names after marriage. That is false. There is no law anywhere supporting that statement.

quoting the bible in Gen 2 verse 22 THEN THE RIB WHICH THE LORD GOD HAD TAKEN FROM MAN HE MADE INTO A WOMAN,AND HE BROUGHT HER TO THE MAN. If u understand that it means that she did nt neglect her name the "WO" is hers n the "MAN" is her husband's. QED. so adding ur father's name to ur marital name is approved.

What is this crap? What is the meaning of the rubbish you typed above? Are you ok? How does the verse show that women should add their father's names to their husband's names? There is no mention of names in that verse and there is no mention of the woman's father in the verse so how on earth did you reach that your absurd conclusion? Moreover the Bible was not revealed in English, it was originally in Hebrew and there is a different word for 'WOMAN' in Hebrew, so that your talk about 'WO' being hers and 'MAN' being her husband's is rubbish.
This is how you people twist Bible verses to support whatever ways of life you have chosen for yourself. I can also twist the verse you quoted and tell you that it means that women were created from ribs and should always stand at the side of a man since they are nothing but ribs that belong in the ribcage of a man. I can draw any interpretation I like from that your verse. Unless you show me where it is explicitly written in the Bible that women are supposed to bear their husband's names then you have no grounds to claim that the Bible supports that culture. If you tell lies against the Bible then you are lying against God since he revealed the Bible not so?
Good.
So stop twisting verses in the Bible to support your ways of life because it is blasphemous to do so.

others who either dropped their surnames or added it to their marital are not fools and i don't think you are more vast or read than most of them. But that argument of urs is insane but however you can prove us all wrong by been the 1st strong woman ever to make her dear husband change his name to answer yours and you will be on GUINNESS WORLD RECORD AS LONG AS YOU LIVE.

Yawn.
If you want to bear your husband's name because you believe you are inferior to him then go right ahead. It's your life.

I didn't see this post before. Let me address it

anonymoux: @ fellis,
No need to fight, and for the record, let me answer your question directly,
Yes, men are so superior to women and that is a fact. Apart from the fact that men are stronger,
smarter, faster, and even bigger.
men have also been blessed by God and his son and only child himself. So it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks...

So women have not been blessed by God or what are you trying to say?
Men are in general, stronger than women but they are not smarter and unless they are athletic, they are not faster. Men and women have the same amounts of intelligence. Men are not smarter than women, that is a lie, and Intelligence is not determined by sex.
I don't understand how you would even think this way.
Let me personalize for you since you people only truly realize how absurd your comments are when you are personally involved.
Did you watch the ALUU4 video? Did you see those animalistic men brutally murdering those boys? What you are saying in essence is that those men are superior to your mother and sisters and even daughter, (if you have any) because they are bigger and stronger than them.
You are also saying that those rapists that murdered Cynthia sometime ago are superior to your mother and sisters because they are men and your female relatives are women.
There is also the mad man in the insane asylum. Is he also superior to your female relatives because he is male?
What about the male politicians that loot and pillage and rob the poor in the country. Are they superior to the women who work hard to make a living, who try their best to give their children an education and raise them to be morally upright? Are the theiving politicians better than these women simply because they are male?
Think about it.

DC-ONE:
@fellis...i just have one or two questions for you...
1.Who was created first on earth Is it a woman or a man ?
2.Check your Bible was a man created from a woman or a woman created from a man.
3.Is your mother using your fathers name...or your father using your mothers name.....PLS ANSWER ME OOH IM WAITING FOR YOU REPLY.

Frankly this why atheists attack we christians, first of all Kim K has the right to bear whatever name she deems fit. The african and the 'I am the man' mentality. Kanye also has the right to leave her if he chooses to,if he doesn't like the last name. Personally I would love my wife to bear my last name,if not I'm not interested,but that is my PERSONAL OPINION,its not law

anonymoux: Secondly, it is very natural to call the man the head of the family
basically, because he provides and cares for the family(at least in most cases)
And on a second, note I believe the change of name is a first sign of commitment
of the wife to the husband....

God is great! And I can relate this commitment issue to the instinct God and his only son gave some animals
like lions.... When a prey is killed, the stronger lion/lioness eats first before the weaker.

This is necessary, if the pride must survive. Because the strong do most of the hunting.
Imagine a case where the weaker eats up all the food before the stronger, I guess there will be no food
left for the stronger lions to feed on before their next hunting which means they will fail and failure means death to the pride.

In same light, men and stronger than women. So the woman has to by fire by force lay low for the man if the home must stand. Two drivers cannot drive a car. You simply give the driving to the best and make the second to best an assistance. It is for the benefit of all....

But if you say women are strong than men or that they are equal, then you are not saying the truth,
nevertheless, should in case that is your believe, i guess a cage fight for you and I will judge

You are a male chauvinist,they are a lot of women smarter than a lot of men and vice versa. This is the problem with us Africans,treat women like rags. Are you more intelligent than Dr.Mrs Okonjo Iweala?

fellis: I didn't see this post before. Let me address it

So women have not been blessed by God or what are you trying to say?
Men are in general, stronger than women but they are not smarter and unless they are athletic, they are not faster. Men and women have the same amounts of intelligence. Men are not smarter than women, that is a lie, and Intelligence is not determined by sex.
I don't understand how you would even think this way.
Let me personalize for you since you people only truly realize how absurd your comments are when you are personally involved.
Did you watch the ALUU4 video? Did you see those animalistic men brutally murdering those boys? What you are saying in essence is that those men are superior to your mother and sisters and even daughter, (if you have any) because they are bigger and stronger than them.
You are also saying that those rapists that murdered Cynthia sometime ago are superior to your mother and sisters because they are men and your female relatives are women.
There is also the mad man in the insane asylum. Is he also superior to your female relatives because he is male?
What about the male politicians that loot and pillage and rob the poor in the country. Are they superior to the women who work hard to make a living, who try their best to give their children an education and raise them to be morally upright? Are the theiving politicians better than these women simply because they are male?
Think about it.

Most Nigerian men are so deeply affect by inferiority complex that they find it difficult to believe that there are women that are actually smarter than they are,and we wonder why violence against women is the norm in our country?.Ego issues Shaking My Head. I am male too and yes I respect women a lot .

Midastorch:

That girl is not worth the arguement brov.you don't need to knw some people before you knw the kinda family they cm frm.A family where the Mum competes with the dad.even tells the dad to shutup and he does.

Fallacy of hasty generalization, because she is advocating for more respect for women,you have inadvertently concluded that is she is direpectful and have even gone as far as insulting her mother. Classic the african male,why can't you argue without insulting people?

anonymoux: @ fellis,

No need to fight, and for the record, let me answer your question directly,
Yes, men are so superior to women and that is a fact. Apart from the fact that men are stronger,
smarter, faster, and even bigger.
men have also been blessed by God and his son and only child himself. So it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks...


The fact that God is a male and that he has only one child and that child is also a male, is enough reason that male will forever rule....

No fighting... By the way, look everywhere around you.... Even the men are generally more accepted even by your fellow female folk that they(female) accept themselves...

Nevertheless, I think women on the other hand are catching up...

Please do not use the name of the Lord IN VAIN because this is a vain argument. And don't you find it absurd or even insulting that you say God is male? And for heavens sake don't try to fit God into earthly standards

kulyie: i am telling you.when you see an intelligent lady,its not difficult to notice.intelligent ladies make me happy and impressed as opposed to a subservient,bimbo like and yes sir woman.obviously the dudes here have no substance to back their arguements hence resort to personality attacks (typical of them anyway) any woman who is opposed to their school of thought or opposed to following their stewpeed sterotype is quickly labelled a feminist,victim of heart break or frustrated woman.i am not suprised though.keep it up fellis.your arguements hold weight.dont let any man allow his superiority or inferiority complex make you who you are not meant to be.thumbs up girl.and for the records any man here or wherever on nairaland is free to call me a feminist or whatever,so be it.i really like and respect women like fellis

Even though we are on the same side of the argument,you are guilty of fallacy of hasty generalization, better to say some dudes or most dudes as I clearly oppose men shoving the foot down the female folks' throats. A note for the men that believe women are foot stools,It is appalling,if you can't handle an intelligent lady marry a dumb one and continue breeding unintelligent linages. That a girl can think for herself doesn't make her 'a loose girl,or a disrespectful girl'. Marriage is not slavery or a power struggle.

Morayo747: Ok I pray you marry a mumuish man that will change his last name to yours!! This is the dumbest thing I've heard in ages for real.

She is not for or against name changing, she is just saying its her right to choose. Please refrain from name calling and personal attacks whilst arguing.STICK TO THE POINT.

chukkynwob:
Most Nigerian men are so deeply affect by inferiority complex that they find it difficult to believe that there are women that are actually smarter than they are,and we wonder why violence against women is the norm in our country?.Ego issues Shaking My Head. I am male too and yes I respect women a lot .

This was very nice to read. It is a good thing that you have respect for women, Africa needs more men like you. Don't let anyone berate you for respecting women.

chukkynwob:
Frankly this why atheists attack we christians, first of all Kim K has the right to bear whatever name she deems fit. The african and the 'I am the man' mentality. Kanye also has the right to leave her if he chooses to,if he doesn't like the last name. Personally I would love my wife to bear my last name,if not I'm not interested,but that is my PERSONAL OPINION,its not law

So why would you prefer her to bear your name?

fellis:
This was very nice to read. It is a good thing that you have respect for women, Africa needs more men like you. Don't let anyone berate you for respecting women.
So why would you prefer her to bear your name?

Frankly speaking because its the norm.

chukkynwob:

Frankly speaking because its the norm.

I understand. It is not easy to go against that culture in the society we live in. If we were in a Muslim country where women don't bear their husbands' names then you would be regarded as the odd one for having a wife that bears your name.

fellis:
I understand. It is not easy to go against that culture in the society we live in. If we were in a Muslim country where women don't bear their husbands' names then you would be regarded as the odd one for having a wife that bears your name.

Exactly cultural differences, but I sure do reject any part of my culture that inhibits the rights of other people.

chukkynwob:


Exactly cultural differences, but I sure do reject any part of my culture that inhibits the rights of other people.

Cool

@Felis...,

i like you a lot cos you are quite deep and very intelligent and most of all, cos u like art. (heh heh heh..just had to sneak that one in)

however, you can be very outspoken too and inasmuch as thhe fact that its a good thing, it has its negatives too.

With regards to the topic at hand, i guess the man pays the bride price and the daughter is handed over to the groom by the bride's parents. This means that she aint under her parents jurisdiction anymore but her husband's and should adopt her spouse's surname.
Methinks if you really deep down love your husband and accept his authority as head of the house and his wife, you should accept his surname. It kinda promotes a kinship and sense of one family cos two distinct surnames....aargh!..it gives me the feeling that all aint well with the couple despite the cheery smiles and what-nots. Besides, it gives the impression that the wife's too pompous and doesnt show obeiscance to the husband.

Hey! I aint married o. I'm just rambling. Thats all. Lol!