Dead Seriousness News:
Pope Benedict XVI
Resigns Papacy, Converts
To Islam HOLY SEE – In a shocking press
conference Sunday, Pope
Benedict XVI revealed to the
world that he will be stepping
down from the Catholic Church’s
highest office. “Through prayer and reflection over the past
years,” the world’s holiest man
began, “I’ve realized that Allah
is the one true God.” Amid clattering camera shutters
and roaring reporters, Pope
Benedict patiently answered
questions, citing traditional
Muslim folklore as well as
passages from the Qur’an to explain his decision. His session
was interrupted only once, when
he swiveled South-East to face
Mecca, stooped to the ground,
and recited the Asr, one of the
five daily prayers central to Muslim belief. The startling reversal comes as a
shock to many familiar with the
Pope’s policies on Islam. “Show
me just what Muhammad
brought that was new and there
you will find things only evil and inhuman, such as his command
to spread by the sword the faith
he preached,” the Bishop of the
Vatican famously said of Islam
in his 2006 lecture Faith, Reason
and the University—Memories and Reflections. When asked about the quote,
Pope Benedict sighed with
good-humored remorse and
chuckled quietly to himself:
“Yeah I’ve regretted that for
some time. But I was young and naïve… I see things much
clearer now. Besides, I’ve always
kinda liked the thought of
having a sword. The Cardinals
were a real pain on that one.” When asked whether he would
be reverting to his born name,
Pope Benedict enthusiastically
interjected. “I’ve decided to
change my name to Sajjad
Sayyid Ratzinger,” His Ex- Holiness explained. “I’m
keeping my surname purely for
logistical reasons, so my
Facebook friends and Twitter
followers won’t be confused.” His transition hasn’t been
without opposition. Hours after
the press conference, a special
Fox and Friends segment aired
on FOXNEWS, featuring a
picture of the Pope photoshopped to include
stereotypical Islāmic features,
including: a turban in place of
his mitre, darkened complexion,
black hair, and Arabic letters
spelling out an endorsement of Barack Hussein Obama tattooed
across his chest. Beneath the
picture, the panel discussed the
possible involvement of Pope
Benedict XVI, 85, in 9/11. The
segment’s title, “The Holy Heathen,” emblazoned the
lower left corner of the screen. This morning, newspapers
nationwide featured an
editorial by Bill O’Reilly detailing
the parallels between the
Pope’s “betrayal of God-loving
Christians everywhere” with the “betrayal of the American
people and the Constitution by
Benedict Arnold, his liberal
agenda, and his radical left-
wing entourage.”

@op, for ur mind

Your blood is filled with crystal meth and it is beginning to melt your brain.

The OP is verrrrrry high on something very cheap and its not good for health.

u see wetin igbo and white sand dey do this boy

let me just rewrite what i posted on the other thread.

the minute anyone saw "swivelled", it should have removed any lingering doubt as to the fantasy aspect of the write up.

assuming there was some gullibility to begin with, on the part of the reader.

btw make una no spam the forum o, @ op.

Haba Op, shey na pawpaw leaf you drag this night?

Nonsense

Keep dreaming.

See hw decent christians are...if we write about mohammed and islam now, there will be bombings in many cities in the 9ja and across the world.

@OP! Did you think you've overslept the whole of march waking up on the first of april to fool us or there is now march fool?
Maybe this is april fool in advance!

Religious extremists & fanatics! Una can constitute nuisance.

Please watch this hilarious Video, DShoww - Figure 8(Dir. By GBFilms) http:///2iOZsBYCDP

@op take it easy with cough syrup

^hahaha
Bennylin with codeine things.

Op u don smoke abi___me am an anglican but you can't just ridicule the head of the catholic world like that na

Abeg pity this Op. He's sorry.

@op, keep dreaming. He can never join d religion of 'piss'

[size=24pt]This is what happens when you drink Alamo mixed with iodine on empty stomach. [/size]

Islam forbids lying and spread of rumor or mischief.So it is only right that you stop the deceit and ensure your facts.