THERE’S A PRICE TO PAY

Some folks have it mighty easy in this day and time. But I feel sorry for folks who have had it easy. You know, it was hard for me to go out on the field. Our home had been like heaven on earth for 10 years, and here I had to be gone 90 percent of the time. That's something to suffer through! My wife raised the children. She is to be commended. I get the credit for it, but she did it. She's the one who instilled the right principles.

When I went out on the field, Ken was in the third grade and Pat was in the second grade. I wasn't with them all those years. Then when they became teenagers, I wasn't with them. I had always looked forward with great anticipation to family life. The day after Ken was born I asked Oretha, "When will he get old enough for me to carry him with me?" It's tough to be out on the field by yourself, shut up in a hotel room staring at the four walls. But God said, "Do it!" When Ken got to be about 12 years old I would take him with me sometimes. I remember once we were driving back to Texas after a service in Oklahoma. We got home, and that night we were kneeling by the bed to pray. Ken began to cry and asked me, "Daddy, why do you have to be gone all the time? Why can't you be home like other daddies?" That's tough to take! I tried not to be gone. I stayed out on the field for seven months. Finally I said, "It's too rough. It's too big a price to pay. I won't pay it. I'll go back to pastoring. I'll be with my family." I cancelled my meetings. On Sunday, July 10, 1949, I was planning to preach at a church in East Texas. It was one of the best churches in the area. I had been assured I could have it if I wanted it.

My wife and I went there that day, and I attended a men's Bible class before the service. I was sitting on a bench and suddenly my heart stopped and I pitched over on the floor on my face. I fell right at the pastor's feet. He picked me up and my heart began to race. You couldn't detect the beating. It felt like something shaking—like a bowl full of gelatin. Some people carried me over to the parsonage next door. I said, "Feel my heart." They felt it and began to cry. Two more preachers came over. They told me later, "We knew you were dead." I was cold all over and white as a sheet. Death was upon my brow.

The ministers ran to the Sunday School addition and one of them motioned to my wife. She was already getting up. She told them, "The Lord spoke to me and told me something had happened to him." She rushed in and fell down beside the bed. She said, "I feel like this is my fault! I was complaining to God because you were gone all the time. And I heard a voice speak while I was washing the dishes. It said, 'I could take him where he would never come back.' I looked all through the house —under the bed and behind the door in the bathroom. I couldn't find anybody. I checked the doors and they were locked. I just decided I was hearing things."

Kneeling there by my bed she prayed, "Lord, that was You who spoke to me in an audible voice. I'll never complain anymore. I don't care how long he's gone or where he goes. I've made my consecration. I'll do what You said to do, Lord." The power of God fell on us. The power of God fell on me. And I was instantly healed! I leaped off that bed and danced through the house. Now, you remember I'd cancelled all my meetings. I didn't have a meeting left, yet I had a wife and two children to support and rent and utilities to pay. You may ask, "Why didn't you just take a job?" I did do that at first. But I never lost sight of the fact that I was in the ministry and was living by faith. So I'd take any meeting, wherever the door opened. We had some of the most miraculous things happen.

I feel sorry for folks who have never had such a privilege. Some of you are driving Cadillacs and living big, and you think you are living by faith. You are no more living by faith than I'm an astronaut. You talk about the faith life while drinking malted milks and eating T-bone steaks! Now, you may get there after awhile. Don't misunderstand me. But we had the biggest time. I think that was one of the sweetest times of our lives. And it was a time of spiritual growth. We lived from week to week and hardly knew where our next meal was coming from. But we were never in lack, because our confidence and faith were in the Lord.

Learn the way of the Spirit. When I went out on the field I fought more devils in that first seven months than I had in the previous 15 years of ministry put together. If the devil could have kept me out of that field ministry, he could have kept me out of where we are now. I'd have given up on it. But I learned through what I suffered. We don't like to hear that side of it too much. But when the Lord has told you something, stay hooked. Go right on through the tests and trials and be perfected.

When I went out on the field, I told Ken, "Here's why I have to be gone. Your Mother and I have made a dedication to the Lord. God said to go. He'll make it up to us."

Mark 10:29 and 30 says: And Jesus answered and said, Verily I say unto you, There is no man that hath left house, or brethren, or sisters, or father, or mother, or wife, or children, or lands, for my sake, and the gospel's, But he shall receive an hundredfold now in this time, houses, and brethren, and sisters, and mothers, and children, and lands, with persecutions; and in the world to come eternal life.

God certainly did make it up to us. I was preaching years later at a Full Gospel church in Cushing, Oklahoma. Suddenly in the night I sat bolt upright in bed. I knew immediately that Ken's life was in danger. He was in the armed forces at that time, serving in Taiwan. That night he had been riding a motorcycle and the front wheel had gone off a mountain. It was thousands of feet to the bottom. If he had gone over the cliff, he would have been killed.

When I sat up in bed, the Lord said to me, "You obeyed Me. If you hadn't, he would never have come back from Taiwan. But you obeyed Me. He'll be back. You can lie down and sleep." So God made it up to me. Yet I had suffered during those years of field ministry. Many times when I left I would be weeping by the time I drove the car around the corner. I would weep all the way to my next meeting. I'd rather have been at home. There's a price to pay, dear friends. But, glory to God, we'll not magnify the suffering. I like to be around when payday comes! It wasn't easy back then. Some people want to start out where I am today. In some ways you can, and in some ways you can't. But after you have suffered a little while, and been faithful, it will pay off. I've never shared some of these things before. I've said, "I'm a faith person—my faith saw me through." But the Lord began to talk to me about preaching this part, too. We've got to tell the other side. It takes faith to go through these trials. Many times, after meetings at night, I would get so lonely. You are by yourself so much. I've actually thought about getting up and kicking out the window panes for a little excitement! If you think that's not suffering, go through it and you'll find out. Yes, there is suffering, but not sickness and disease. Thank God you don't have to suffer with that, because Jesus bore our infirmities.

Say this: "I will serve Him. I will do His bidding. I'll do His will no matter what the cost may be." It costs something to separate yourself unto the ministry that God has called you to. The foundation for my ministry today came in my staying put. I stayed in places where I didn't want to stay. That's where I learned so much. That's when the foundation was established in me. Stay put in hard places, and you will eventually rest upon the mountaintop. (Kenneth E. Hagin)

Mr man take this to the literature section. Thank you