As anyone who has spent any amount of time on earth will tell you: Women are generally the most indecisive creatures on earth. Ladies, What is it about making a decision that totally messes your chi up like that? For every little thing, every single matter must be tabled before your friends and sometimes even people you don't even know, for approval. Matters like "He's coming to pick me up from work. Do I kiss him on the cheeks or on the lips?" Are you so emotionally detached from your own will that you crave so much public direction and validation?

Some might argue and say, well guys do it too, but don't even go there. Let me just warn you now to get lost. Bullshit aside, we all know this is a woman thing.

I have a thing, a respect you could say, for assertive women who are secure enough in their own ability to make certain decisions on their own without desperately seeking an external, communal go-ahead. These sorts are always the best to have mature, serious relationships with as you would be dating a person and not a hive.

Ladies, please shed some light on this and review your personal behaviors. Put some words to your feelings that trigger the need to do this, so everyone can learn and understand ourselves better.

Women love to impress. They (almost all) expect men to pay attention to details...so they are very careful about everything they do, say or wear. They are emotional too. You hardly see men having a teary group hug when their hearts get broken. I love women that raise their shoulders high and have a mind of their own.

Caracta:
Women love to impress. They (almost all) expect men to pay attention to details...so they are very careful about everything they do, say or wear. They are emotional too. You hardly see men having a teary group hug when their hearts get broken. I love women that raise their shoulders high and have a mind of their own.

Abi O. Thanks for your input sis.
Ladies, we need to hear more from you on this. Air out your reason (or lack there of) for needing to do this. You can do it

Not me.

Perhaps the need to be validated.

It is not limited to the women folks anyway.

ogugua88: Not me.

Yeah you seem to have an independent streak about you. It's a good thing...

We need more women to break out of the hive mind mentality so we men can actually date REAL women with HER OWN will and ideals and not a walking composition of 2000 different consciousnesses. This is why most of them are fickle and fluctuate so often and broadly. This is as a result of their true self battling their fake, hive-built self.

**following**

Some men fall into this category too. Chei! I remember. Can be very annoying.

Simples!

Cos Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus!

2buff: Yeah you seem to have an independent streak about you. It's a good thing...

We need more women to break out of the hive mind mentality so we men can actually date REAL women with HER OWN will and ideals and not a walking composition of 2000 different consciousnesses. This is why most of them are fickle and fluctuate so often and broadly. This is as a result of their true self battling their fake, hive-built self.

I think there are more independent women than some men realize.

Maybe it's geography or with whom I socialize, but I actually don't know many women who rely on friends like that. I talk with people I'm close with (junior sisters, cousins), but I'd never go out and have a girlfriend session and then act based on what they tell me. That's childish. I can make rational decisions on my own and in a heart beat, but I love hearing from people around me, just to explore other ways of thinking. I think there are a good number of women who are the same way to be honest.

There are similarities between the quest for "real" women and the quest for "real" men. What I've noticed is that people who make such statements have a predetermined mindset and don't open up themselves to the opposite sex or act naturally around them. They tend to look for reasons to deem that person unreal or typical. I'm speaking from personal experience anyway. Obviously it varies. All I know is that when I was judgmental, I felt surrounded by horrible guys. When I let my guard down, I met sweethearts.

LOL @ needing a community to make decisions.

But what other behaviour would you expect from a gurl child whose families take sole decisions for her without giving her a voice in it, or
When she makes decisions on her own, rather than being encouraged and corrected by her dear family and friends lovingly, she's being laughed at?

Of course, she'l definitely grow up being dependent on people to make her decisions, it's more of some psychological ish with ugly roots which must be worked on.

However,
If she's gat some streaks of bad decisions on her own in the past, there's nothing wrong confiding in a friend she holds dear for future decisions.

cowgurl:
But what other behaviour would you expect from a gurl child whose families take sole decisions for her without giving her a voice in it, or
When she makes decisions on her own, rather than being encouraged and corrected by her dear family and friends lovingly, she's being laughed at?

Of course, she'l definitely grow up being dependent on people to make her decisions, it's more of some psychological ish with ugly roots which must be worked on.

Wow wow wow! I've never looked at it from this point of view. Makes a lot of sense. There's always a reason for certain actions. Nice.

This thread will soon be taken over by feminists

What cowgirl described is psychological, but it certainly isn't a disorder. Rather than become more vocal and take control of their situations, some women are comfortable with their dependent lifestyles. Any woman who wants to be independent has the power to be independent.

Oh well, most women love to talk and bond so its not a surprise when they consult each other before making their decisions, sometimes it has to do with the fact that they feel the need to discuss stuffs with someone who may have been in the situation they find themselves in for guidance\advice.

Having said this, many of such women after consulting with friends and gathering different opinions, still go ahead to do what their own minds tell them(hard to believe but true).Its more of a case of wanting to hear what others think of a situation, than not being able to make a decision.

2buff you have woman trouble? You seem to be asking a lot of questions about women lately.

Lord_Reed: 2buff you have woman trouble? You seem to be asking a lot of questions about women lately.

lol Nah bro I just think and analyze issues. And this particular issue is a common enough one for anyone who has been around women. It frustrates many-a-man.

2buff:

lol Nah bro I just think and analyze issues. And this particular issue is a common enough one for anyone who has been around women. It frustrates many-a-man.

Well for me it isn't common more of the women I interact with do not wait for "community say so" before they make their decision rather they will have made up their minds before even discussing it with friends and only just to hear their opinions, some of which either validates or counters their position. More often than not I find that they will do want they've already decided not what their friends said.