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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Help!!!! My Husband Has Lost Interest In Sex (4487 Views)
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Help!!!! My Husband Has Lost Interest In Sex by helplesswife: 8:57am On Jul 09, 2013 |
Hello people,I'm a newbie here! Pls I'm in a helpless situation! My husband of 3yrs has lost interest in sex! He can go 3mnths without touching me and to him it is normal! Even when I try touching him,he'll push me away! He doesn't kiss me and doesn't allow me kiss him,I've talked to him,cried,got angry,yet no change! I've asked him if he's seeing someone but he says no! He keeps promising me he will change but it keeps getting worse! He's a very good husband and a wonderful father to our kids but this sex issue is really eating me up! I'm a woman who has sexual feelings and need to be satisfied! I can't go outside my marriage to do it and I'm afraid my husband may not change! Pls what could likely be the reason and what can I do to change his lack of interest! |
Re: Help!!!! My Husband Has Lost Interest In Sex by Blov: 9:00am On Jul 09, 2013 |
hmmm, jus passing |
Re: Help!!!! My Husband Has Lost Interest In Sex by bellong: 9:11am On Jul 09, 2013 |
This is a complicated issue as the cause may range from medical to psychological. Have you ever sat down to discuss about it? You need to probe to know the root cause, maybe he has developed a medical condition he doesn't want you to know. Talk to him. It could also be that he is going through one of financial trouble, work related stress and many other psychological issues he is keeping to himself. Talking with him to identify the root is the first step to solving the problem You may also have done or still doing irritable things that put him off. Are you always clean? Do you argue with him on every issue? do you snub or nag at every given opportunity? Many more questions about you. In essence, you both need to talk it out first. 2 Likes |
Re: Help!!!! My Husband Has Lost Interest In Sex by cardoso111(m): 9:12am On Jul 09, 2013 |
You have alot of work to do on him!start gradually showing him adult film and making slow and steady otherwise he will think you are going out.Dont report him to anybody but pray out loud to his heariong that God will give him strenght....i will come back later ...i am driving!!! |
Re: Help!!!! My Husband Has Lost Interest In Sex by sirmally: 9:21am On Jul 09, 2013 |
Please don't be deceived he has another woman and he bleeps her well so he feels guilty that's why he takes good care of u and ur kids. Bt tbh ur marriage is coming to an end |
Re: Help!!!! My Husband Has Lost Interest In Sex by AbdulAdam56(m): 9:28am On Jul 09, 2013 |
sir mally: Please don't be deceived he has another woman and he bleeps her well so he feels guilty that's why he takes good care of u and ur kids. Bt tbh ur marriage is coming to an endwhy are you judging him? |
Re: Help!!!! My Husband Has Lost Interest In Sex by omiobo: 9:33am On Jul 09, 2013 |
sir mally: Please don't be deceived he has another woman and he bleeps her well so he feels guilty that's why he takes good care of u and ur kids. Bt tbh ur marriage is coming to an endAh! Mouth opened!!!Oga it may not be what you think. if the husband is suffering from stress and depression he can never feel urge. OP,I will urge you to study husband if he is suffering depression,try to know the cause and help him in overcoming the depression. Then he will be good to go if he is not having extra marital affair. |
Re: Help!!!! My Husband Has Lost Interest In Sex by Nobody: 9:47am On Jul 09, 2013 |
If u are guilty of looking unattractive in your home, carelessly exposing ur unclothedness consciously or subconsciously all the time , then u can't really blame him... try to always look good n sexy for ur husband. Don't do so only because u wana get down with him. It sld a tradition. Try to b romantic too. He may not be seeing another. He might be tired of seeing the same package. Trust me, even if u r as hot as a screen goddess, but u don't bring in different flavours to ur marriage, he wld stil lose interest. Have a talk too wit him. It cld b dat u r not sexually adventerous/creative in bed. If that is the case, u will need creative ideas. Don't forget to pray. Its the most important. Choose ur prayer point wisely... goodluck |
Re: Help!!!! My Husband Has Lost Interest In Sex by mgbeketoto: 10:45am On Jul 09, 2013 |
Very normal. . . . The man don tire. Learn to 'touch' yourself. . . . Time for separate rooms darling! IT IS CALLED SUFFERING AND SMILING IN MARRIAGE! There is more to life than SEX! Me sef don lose interest tey-tey. . . .I JUST HAVE TO GET DRUNK. . . to do it PRO-PRO-LY! One of the many blessings of being a female is that YOU CAN NEVER SUFFER 'PAWA FAILURE' in marriage! TOTO IS ALWAYS WET! Please, join the MANY suffering the same fate on NL. . . .THE REASON MANY STAY HERE JUMPING FROM THREAD TO THREAD. . . . .while pretending to be happily married and IN LOVE! There is no condition that is PERMANENT. . . . .except IMPOTENCE! Please ask PATIENCE JONATHAN when last she saw GEJ'S pehnis! Mu che che che che che che! *belches* 2 Likes |
Re: Help!!!! My Husband Has Lost Interest In Sex by Nobody: 11:29am On Jul 09, 2013 |
mgbeketoto: Very normal. . . . Callotti d' hallotti!!! Don't I just love u! Welcome back sweerie! By the way, I'm still waiting for that Dubai gist oooo. |
Re: Help!!!! My Husband Has Lost Interest In Sex by mgbeketoto: 11:33am On Jul 09, 2013 |
bettymafy: Peeps around. . . .checking ya profile page and 'ASSOCIATIONS'. . . NOT THAT I COULD KIA LESS O! *Na who be dis?* Unknown ID. . . Gooooooooooooooood! I shall reply ya! I don't want any of those STAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALE. . . .OLD SICKENING 'FOLLOW-FOLLOW' IDS around moi! UPDATE OF MY LIFE. . . not just DUBAI!! You know I get bored VERY EASILY. . . ? SICK OF THAT DIARIES' SECTION. . . .OVER-DOSAGE!TWAAAAAAH!!! I WILL NOT CLICK THERE FOR A GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD WHILE! TOOOOOOOOOOOOO MANY PISSSSSSSSSSSSSURES. . . SSSSSSSHECK OUT MY HOTEL ROOM! Na HELELE FOR JBR! (Jumeirah Beach Residence in DUBAI MARINA) Of course. . . I 'locked' up my mom and kids plus the nanny in another HOTEL down the road. . . . I have 3 cameras LOADED. . . WHERE I WAN START? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HQUJLCJcV4E THANK YOU JARE! Dubai gist long. . . MY CHILDREN wore me out. . .I could not perform! WE SPENT 2 FREAKING DAYS AT 'WILD WADI'(Btw BURJ AL ARAB AND JUMEIRAH HOTEL). . .$2000 go fiaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaam for souvenirs and TRAAAAAAAAAAAASH FOOD! THE PICTURES? A WHOLE FLASHDRIVE COURTESY OF 'WILD WADI'! DEM NOR GREE COMOT OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH. . . CHINEKE!!!! But we are planning a 're-match' for my birthday in PARIS. NO CHILDREN OR MOMMY THIS TIME! Kei!!!! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8GziaYw67IY Please. . . don't let Awon H-EE BADU BELLE AND H-EE JOLOSI quench o! You know they are TOO LOCAL AND BROKE to take vacations off NL! With all the 'stolen loot' and all to open 'BEND-DOWN-PICK' BOUTIQUES . . .all over "LONDON FOG" ati OGUN STATE! AWON "OBUDU 'CATO' RANCH LEVELS"! TWAAAAH!!!! LOCAL FUGLY TINS! If you see JEWELRY. . .COMPLETE SETS. . . .with studded RINGS and BRACELETS WEY MY "PDP-2015-DEADLINE-TO-LEAVE-AMERICA-FOR-GOOD" BOBO BUY FOR MOI EHN? LIKE 10 CORRECT SETS!TO SAFETY DEPOSIT BOX FOR BANK STRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIGHT! Abeg nor let IGBANKE-5 OR OSHOGBO-5 OR ABIA-5 OR BOKO-SHARIA 5 OF NL KIDNAPPERS NEAR MOI O! Gist too plenty! IT WAS ONE WEEK OF CORRRRRRRRECT FUN WITH MY MOM. . . THE CHILDREN AND MY BOYFRIEND AKA SUGAR DADDY! I miss flight taya! My darling husband dey for where DR. NGO OKONJO-IWEALA keep her own! IN THE COOLER. . .AS INVESTMENT FOR OLD AGES ONLY. . . NO CHRISTO-SHARIA DIEVORCE NECESSARY IN SWEEEEEEEEET H-OPIN MARRIAGES! Mu che che che che che che FAKE LIFE GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD OOOOOOOH! O TEGESE DA FUNKY AZZZE LONDON-STRANDED BROKE-AZZE NL BABY! Back to topic jare. . . .6AM! MY MAMA DON WAKE. . .TIME TO FEED HER AND TAKE HER OUT. . . MORE SHOPPING TO DO, SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OFF I GO! BACK TO SCHOOL IS AROUND THE CORNER. . . THE LIST IS LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG! FROM NEW BACK-PACKS TO NEW PENCILS! CLOTHES!SHOES!HAIR DECORATIONS!. . . .MUST BE BOUGHT! OFF FOR THE NEXT 5 DAYS TO SPEND WITH MY DARLING MOM. . .THEN BACK TO WORK! NEW CONTRACT. . .AUSTIN, TEXAS. . . HERE I COME. . .I AM GONNA LOVVVIT! LIFE IS GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!!!!! NO NEED TO SIDDON FOR NL DEY DO 'LOCAL OKORO-MGBEKE' CHAMPION OF CYBER-LOVERS! LEVELS PLEASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSE!!!! Logging off! . . . AFTER CLEARING ALL 'FOLLOWED TOPICS' FROM MY PROFILE PAGE. . . I DON'T FOLLOW THRASSSSSSSSSSSSSSH!!! I LOVE MY PAGE BLAAAAAAAAAAAAANK. . . .NO FOLLOW-FOLLOW JUNK! [size=20pt]Tada![/size] 1 Like |
Re: Help!!!! My Husband Has Lost Interest In Sex by cycline404(m): 12:51pm On Jul 09, 2013 |
Check ur HIV Status Both of u! |
Re: Help!!!! My Husband Has Lost Interest In Sex by Nobody: 1:41pm On Jul 09, 2013 |
. . |
Re: Help!!!! My Husband Has Lost Interest In Sex by Nobody: 1:42pm On Jul 09, 2013 |
. . |
Re: Help!!!! My Husband Has Lost Interest In Sex by Nobody: 6:26pm On Jul 09, 2013 |
Please what is your hygiene like?(please no offense intended,its just that bad hygiene can be an impediment to a healthy sex life).i have seen many married women that omit offensive odors. It keeps me wondering how their husband humps them,irrespective of their white coated tongues and smelly privates.If you are not guilty of these,then you might look into other factors like cheating and psychological factors. Firstly,the work starts with you,check your corners and be sure it's pristine before you try to figure out your husband. |
Re: Help!!!! My Husband Has Lost Interest In Sex by dasparrow: 8:20pm On Jul 09, 2013 |
helplesswife: Hello people,I'm a newbie here! Pls I'm in a helpless situation! My husband of 3yrs has lost interest in sex! He can go 3mnths without touching me and to him it is normal! Even when I try touching him,he'll push me away! He doesn't kiss me and doesn't allow me kiss him,I've talked to him,cried,got angry,yet no change! I've asked him if he's seeing someone but he says no! He keeps promising me he will change but it keeps getting worse! He's a very good husband and a wonderful father to our kids but this sex issue is really eating me up! I'm a woman who has sexual feelings and need to be satisfied! I can't go outside my marriage to do it and I'm afraid my husband may not change! Pls what could likely be the reason and what can I do to change his lack of interest! The problem is: You have a very high sex drive like a horse on Viagra while your husband has a low sex drive. This is why I always shake my head when I see Nigerians rush into marriage with someone they barely know. You and your spouse should have discussed issues concerning sex drive while both of you were dating each other. There are people out there who have a very low sex drive and there is absolutely nothing you can do about it because that is how God created them. At this point you can either focus on your career (if you have one) and take care of your kids and home; keep yourself busy and you will be too tired to even think about or engage in sex or you can buy a d*i*l*d*o and self service. If you have no money to purchase a d*i*l*d*o (artificial p*e*n*i*s), buy a carrot from an aboki and use that instead or get a divorce. Those are your options. Pick one. *I wonder what women like this will do should she find herself without a man at some point in her life* 1 Like |
Re: Help!!!! My Husband Has Lost Interest In Sex by abayomi23(f): 9:09pm On Jul 09, 2013 |
dasparrow: advice someone in trouble dat's all I wonder why u're being judgmental. dasparrow: |
Re: Help!!!! My Husband Has Lost Interest In Sex by abayomi23(f): 9:09pm On Jul 09, 2013 |
dasparrow: advice someone in trouble dat's all I wonder why u're being judgmental. dasparrow: |
Re: Help!!!! My Husband Has Lost Interest In Sex by Nobody: 7:47am On Jul 10, 2013 |
It is grossly abnormal for young couples sleeping on same beds to not 'dance' from time to time. OP, something is wrong somewhere, try to get to its root and fix it. Bros Dasparrow- is there a secret you want to share 1 Like |
Re: Help!!!! My Husband Has Lost Interest In Sex by Mystery11(m): 10:19am On Jul 10, 2013 |
You need to answer these questions: 1.Was he very sexually-active as you desired before the present condition? 2.Was he romantic from day one of the relationship? 3.Are you fully sure he is not cheating on you? 4.How long did you court at least to determine his behaviour? 5.Did you offend him in any form? Those questions will determine my contribution. |
Re: Help!!!! My Husband Has Lost Interest In Sex by Nobody: 11:33am On Jul 10, 2013 |
It could be anything from poor hygiene to low sex drive, depression or you look unattractive or he is cheating on u. Eliminate these causes one after the other and u have ur answer. |
Re: Help!!!! My Husband Has Lost Interest In Sex by helplesswife: 11:48am On Jul 10, 2013 |
Mystery 1: You need to answer these questions: No! He was not sexually active when we got married! His first was after marriage. Yes! He was romantic No! I am very sure he's not cheating on me We courted for 2yrs and there was no lovemaking in those 2yrs! We only kissed nd dats all No! I didn't offend him And to add,I am very neat to a fault! I'm also on the attractive side(at least by my own judgement),I've got d right curves in the right places to o! 1 Like |
Re: Help!!!! My Husband Has Lost Interest In Sex by Nobody: 12:15pm On Jul 10, 2013 |
My dear the country is hard. How is his financials? How are things at work? Do you guys talk or does he just come home, eat, watch TV and go to bed? Do you do things together? Do you play games, have fun outside the home? Are your outings only to church and gatherings? Try to do other things to stimulate each others minds beyond s3x. Try to get him to open up and talk to you not by waking him up at night but by doing couple things. Take him out on a date and pay, pick him from work and hang out. A stroll at weekends or in the evenings is always good, depending on what time you close or when you both get home. Board games like good old fashioned ludo and what are great bonding mechanisms. Marriage these days is beyond food and s3x, sometimes even men just need to be free and relaxed. The country and things happening can make one insane it takes a balanced and calm person not to be infected by what goes on. Know your man |
Re: Help!!!! My Husband Has Lost Interest In Sex by blank(f): 12:48pm On Jul 10, 2013 |
Your husband is probably gay. He married you to hide his "gayness" and have children. Now he has those, he sees no need to hide anymore. I know a couple like that. We were all suprised when he said he was getting married. They have 2 boys now and the guy is practically living wit his boyfriend abi na girlfriend. The wife will be making same complaints as you. |
Re: Help!!!! My Husband Has Lost Interest In Sex by Nobody: 8:51pm On Jul 10, 2013 |
mgbeketoto: Very normal. . . .i just love your blunt personality.honestly you crack me up big time @ op you m,ay need to get a v-i,b'raaaaaaaat,,,,,,,,or.that will replace your husbands penis.since he refused to give you the thing,you sef find an alternative that wont involve adultery.pele.men sef.isssh.smh |
Re: Help!!!! My Husband Has Lost Interest In Sex by Nobody: 8:58pm On Jul 10, 2013 |
dasparrow:sex is food for the soul na abi you no dey do am 5 times a week :p God is watching you DURING THE ACT:p so dont you dare lie :p8-) |
Re: Help!!!! My Husband Has Lost Interest In Sex by Nobody: 9:23pm On Jul 10, 2013 |
mgbeketoto:i too gbadun you jare.i dey feel you die |
Re: Help!!!! My Husband Has Lost Interest In Sex by mgbeketoto: 9:10am On Jul 11, 2013 |
kulyie: i too gbadun you jare.i dey feel you die Thanks kulyie. I got your message from NL. . . in my e-mail box. Sorry. . . I do not like to keep contacts with ANY member from ANY forum. Please, drop your message right here on NL. . . Thanks! |
Re: Help!!!! My Husband Has Lost Interest In Sex by Mystery11(m): 8:45pm On Jul 11, 2013 |
helplesswife: From your answers, Your husband is not very keen on sex from day one.He has a strong self control which is actually affecting his lovelife.Yes he does happen when the control is much. What you need to do is to increase your communication.Let him understand how things are not very good in your lovelife. You need to increase your romantic life doing things lovely and very romantic.I strongly believe that will trigger the ''man'' in him reasonably ,at least to satisfy you sexually |
Re: Help!!!! My Husband Has Lost Interest In Sex by ifihearam: 9:16pm On Jul 11, 2013 |
Women and complains....... if a man ask for sex always they complain,if he doesn't they still complain. wetin man go do na? |
Re: Help!!!! My Husband Has Lost Interest In Sex by dayokanu(m): 9:35pm On Jul 11, 2013 |
Put Burantashi in his food 3 Likes |
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