Little Johnny’s kindergarten class was on a field trip to the local police station, where they saw pictures of the 10 Most Wanted men tacked to a bulletin board.
One of the youngsters pointed to a picture and asked if it really was the photo of a wanted person.

“Yes,” said the policeman. “The detectives want him very badly.”

So Little Johnny asked, “Why didn’t you keep him when you took his picture?”
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Have you all heard of the new test thay will replace the breathalyzer test?
Well the test is that anyone suspected to be drunk and driving will be made to juggle a set of four sharp knives
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Toughest Final Exam

Instructions
Read each question carefully. Answer all questions. Time limit: 4 hours. Begin immediately.

History
Descrive the history of the papacy from its origins to the present day, concentrating especially but not exclusively, on it social, political, economic, religious, and philosophical impact on Europe, Asia, America and Africa. Be brief, concise, and specific.

Medicine
You have been provided with a razor blade, a piece of gauze, and a bottle of Scotch. Remove your appendix. Do not suture until your work has been inspected. You have fifteen minutes.

Public Speaking
2500 riot-crazed aboriginies are storming the classroom. Calm them. You may use any ancient language except Latin or Greek.

Biology
Create life. Estimate the differences in subsequent human culture if the form of life had developed 50 million years earlier, with special attention to its probable effect on the English parliamentary system. Prove your thesis.

Music
Write a piano concerto. Orchestrate and perform it with flute and drum. You will find a piano under your seat.

Psychology
Based on your knowledge of their works evaluate the emotional stability, degree of adjustment and repressed frustrations of each of the following: Alexander of Aphrodites, Ramses II, Gregory of Nicea, Hammurabi. Support your evaluation with quotations from each man’s work, making appropriate references. It is not necessary to translate.

Sociology
Estimate the sociological problems which might accompany the end of the world. Construct an experiment to test your theory.

Engineering
The dissassembled parts of a high-powered rifle have been placed on your desk. You will also find an instruction manual, printed in Swahili. In ten minutes a hungry Bengal tiger will be admitted to the room. Take whatever action you feel appropriate. Be prepared to justify your decision.

Economics
Develop a realistic plan for refinancing the national debt. Trace the possible effects of your plan in the following areas. Cubism, the Donatist controversy, the wave theory of light. Outline a method for preventing these effects. Criticize this method from all possible points of view. Point out the deficiencies in your point of view, as demonstrated in you answer to the last question.

Political Science
There is a red telephone on the desk beside you. Start World War III. Report at length on it socio-political effects if any.

Epistemology
Take a postion for or against truth. Prove the validity of your postion.

Physics
Explain the nature of matter. Include in your answer an evaluation of the impact of the development of mathematics on science.

Astronomy
Define the universe. Give three examples.

General Knowledge
Describe in detail. Be objective and specific.

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A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his attractive, blonde, female neighbor came out of the house and went straight to the mailbox. She opened it, looked inside, slammed it shut, and stormed back into her house. A little later she came out of her house again, went to the mailbox, again opened it, and slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into the house she went. As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, here she came again. She marched to the mailbox, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever. Puzzled by her actions, the man asked her, “Is something wrong?”

To which she replied, “There certainly is! My stupid computer keeps telling me I have mail!”

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An old man and a young man worked in office next to each other. The young man had noticed that the older man always seemed to have a jar of peanuts on his desk. The young man loved peanuts.

One day while the older man was away from his desk the young man couldn’t resist and went to the old man’s jar and ate over half the peanuts.

When the old man returned the young man felt guilty and confessed to taking the peanuts.

The old man responded “That’s ok since I lost my teeth all I can do is lick the chocolate off the M&Ms.”
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'ope y'all enjoyed them. more on the way

A woman was very distraught at the fact that she
had not had a date, nor any sex, in quite
sometime. She was afraid she might have something
wrong with her so she decided to employ the
medical expertise of a sex therapist. Her MD
recommended a Dr. Chang.

She went to see Dr. Chang and, upon entering the
examination room, he said, "Ok, take off all your
crose" "Now, get down and crawl reery fass to the
other side of room." She does. Dr. Chang then
said, "Ok now crawl reery fass to me." So she did.

Dr. Chang slowly shook his head and said, "Your
probrem vewy bad, you haf Zachary Disease, worse
case I ever see, that why you not haf sex or
dates."

Confused, the woman said, "What is Zachary
Disease?"

Dr. Chang replied, "It when your face rook
Zachary rike your ass."

funny. hahahhahaha,

delicious,simply must have more. i kinda think world war 3 could be started here on nairaland

delicious,simply must have more. i kinda think world war 3 could be started here on nairaland

lmao @ ''i have a mail"

romsky:

just lyk dat of tyty, abbey & kunbee

Lair

;d ;d :d :d ;d

Eror plus