How much will turning this script into movie cost... And criticisms r highly welcome..

It depends on how much you intend shooting the film with...how much is in your budget.

Thank God oh. All these writers wey dey hide for hia don dey come out small small.

I have read it and I liked the dialogue. Didn't know it was a 'ghanaian script'...lol. But should a script be concerned about camera movement? I thought it's the work of the director.

And the story is not just for kids naa...adults may have one or two things to learn.

The line: 'God listens to little children' touched me. If we Christians can have a heart like a child, we would see more of God's power.

Btw, I would have loved it more if you wrote against the status quo in a society like ours where religion tends to make many lose common sense sometimes and ppl say 'We leave it to God' in cases where swift actions should have been taken.

But I would insist it is luck/coincidence...not God...to answer 'Esther's question' in the script. Why? God doesn't need to prove Himself to anybody. Even when He does, those who won't believe will not. It's either they call it coincidence or magic. Blessed are those that have not seen but believe.

I like this. It's still a bit dialogue heavy with a lot or repeats. Can you find something that happens that 'points' the boys into the direction of the subject matter of 'if God answers prayers.' Maybe something 'leading' they say or happens before the ball gets stuck in the tree?

Anyway I still like it. On budget - from zero to anything you want... you have to decided how much you have, how much you want to spend on it and make that work for you.

The only issue (it's not really an issue, I'm just explaining something here for all writers/aspiring writers) with shooting this I see is you've written in a 'wind machine' - that will be a bit expensive - and if you decide to go natural' and film on a windy day then what about all the shots that have no wind... how do you control the wind? Using a half shot view of the tree and using sticks or something to shake the tree so the ball falls will probably look odd. Remember playing 'football' with those cheap printed balls that even when it's not windy they tend to 'fly'. Visually, that with blowing leaves/dust will sell the effect but we're back to talking about using a wind machine. I've purposely said what I wrote above to make you see 'things' you write and to higlight something Sholay said to you...

...You've written in some directions (which makes us see things in a 'set' way). Sometimes a direction by the writer is crucial to make the readers, director, cast & crew see EXACTLY what the writer means... but not in this case for the couple or so you wrote in. So back to the tree wind thingy I put a picture in your head that is hard to pull off because I wrote it in a way that made you SEE the TREE in that shot. That shot can easily be done without spending a penny on it by using a different 'direction' - a tighter shot on the 3 of them, pref over the shoulder of the uncle with both boys facing the camera - the wind, dust, leaves and ball effect becomes pretty easy to cheat because you've made our 'eyes' focus on something else. Since it's a tighter shot get your friends to fan leaves, dust and throw the ball into the shot.

That's an easy one to figure out but I only wrote this... not just for you but for other writers as well because someone once sent me a SHORT that would have cost MORE than a Harry Potter feature to make and you immediately spot that person as a newbie with big fantasies but no grip on the reality of filmmaking.
Unless you have the BEST VFX artist ever do not be crashing a fully loaded 747 into a concorde in your short film that is full of massive exotic castles and whatnot - oh and it was a fantasy film as well. My one question to that person was 'How in the world do you intend to shoot this?' - never heard from them again lolol.

PS - I'm a fan of indie low budget stuff, I like the difficult challenge of how to make things look good and complex without spending jack on them lol

prof800: It depends on how much you intend shooting the film with...how much is in your budget.

120,000 naira.

sholay2011: Thank God oh. All these writers wey dey hide for hia don dey come out small small.

I have read it and I liked the dialogue. Didn't know it was a 'ghanaian script'...lol. But should a script be concerned about camera movement? I thought it's the work of the director.

And the story is not just for kids naa...adults may have one or two things to learn.

The line: 'God listens to little children' touched me. If we Christians can have a heart like a child, we would see more of God's power.

Btw, I would have loved it more if you wrote against the status quo in a society like ours where religion tends to make many lose common sense sometimes and ppl say 'We leave it to God' in cases where swift actions should have been taken.

But I would insist it is luck/coincidence...not God...to answer 'Esther's question' in the script. Why? God doesn't need to prove Himself to anybody. Even when He does, those who won't believe will not. It's either they call it coincidence or magic. Blessed are those that have not seen but believe.

thanks a lot...ur suggestions were all on point. Especially, the idea u suggested...thanks a lot, bro..

VillageBoi: I like this. It's still a bit dialogue heavy with a lot or repeats. Can you find something that happens that 'points' the boys into the direction of the subject matter of 'if God answers prayers.' Maybe something 'leading' they say or happens before the ball gets stuck in the tree?

Anyway I still like it. On budget - from zero to anything you want... you have to decided how much you have, how much you want to spend on it and make that work for you.

The only issue (it's not really an issue, I'm just explaining something here for all writers/aspiring writers) with shooting this I see is you've written in a 'wind machine' - that will be a bit expensive - and if you decide to go natural' and film on a windy day then what about all the shots that have no wind... how do you control the wind? Using a half shot view of the tree and using sticks or something to shake the tree so the ball falls will probably look odd. Remember playing 'football' with those cheap printed balls that even when it's not windy they tend to 'fly'. Visually, that with blowing leaves/dust will sell the effect but we're back to talking about using a wind machine. I've purposely said what I wrote above to make you see 'things' you write and to higlight something Sholay said to you...

...You've written in some directions (which makes us see things in a 'set' way). Sometimes a direction by the writer is crucial to make the readers, director, cast & crew see EXACTLY what the writer means... but not in this case for the couple or so you wrote in. So back to the tree wind thingy I put a picture in your head that is hard to pull off because I wrote it in a way that made you SEE the TREE in that shot. That shot can easily be done without spending a penny on it by using a different 'direction' - a tighter shot on the 3 of them, pref over the shoulder of the uncle with both boys facing the camera - the wind, dust, leaves and ball effect becomes pretty easy to cheat because you've made our 'eyes' focus on something else. Since it's a tighter shot get your friends to fan leaves, dust and throw the ball into the shot.

That's an easy one to figure out but I only wrote this... not just for you but for other writers as well because someone once sent me a SHORT that would have cost MORE than a Harry Potter feature to make and you immediately spot that person as a newbie with big fantasies but no grip on the reality of filmmaking.
Unless you have the BEST VFX artist ever do not be crashing a fully loaded 747 into a concorde in your short film that is full of massive exotic castles and whatnot - oh and it was a fantasy film as well. My one question to that person was 'How in the world do you intend to shoot this?' - never heard from them again lolol.

PS - I'm a fan of indie low budget stuff, I like the difficult challenge of how to make things look good and complex without spending jack on them lol

you are too much. It surprises me how u notice little things that are very important and essential. Thanks alot, bro. U r making me a better screenwriter!!!

Nice script but I think you should leave the camera works for the director.....

allan_dutch: Nice script but I think you should leave the camera works for the director.....

ok.