hi everyone,plz help a sister out on this issue.i just found out that my fiance has been telling me lies.he just confessed to me recently about it and am looking for a logical reason and explanation towards why he told those lies.first,he told me that he was the eldest of 6 children,he later confessed that he's an only child.he lied about his surname and claimed another man as his father whereas his mum gave birth to him during her secondary schooldays though she's married now (i have met with the mum and she has met my parents.this was before he travelled ).the latest one is that he told me that he was going to further his education in oklahoma whereas he's presently in kenya.he made all these confessions on phone so now am puzzled.i dont know whether to leave him or not,so help me on this one,advice me before i go nuts

sorry about what happened, I guess you just met the wrong man, thay are alot of good men out there that am sure wont hurt you in any way.

sorry dear, if itz me, cuz i don't lie about such things and won't find it funny if a man i will marry does da same, am out esp. if it is sumthing small like diz that is not worth lieing for. being da eldest when hez da only child, going to go 2 skool in the states, lie about lastname, mennn, am gonna leave da man esp. since I HAVEN'T Said I DO yet cuz if he can lie about diz things, wat is next? think well and make ur choice but as for me, itz ova
did he lie about all these things to make u feel beter, is his lastname popular that u might have heard of it or sumthing about about it, or is he thinking dat u won't marry him/date him if u know hea da only child or dat his mom gave birth 2 him when she was in sec. skool?  na wah oooo, how old is diz man? lata

he told me that he was the eldest of 6 children

He wanted you to think that he's responsible.

he lied about his surname and claimed another man as his father

He has familial wahala and childhood issues.

he told me that he was going to further his education in oklahoma whereas he's presently in kenya.

He told you that to impress you- but you Can't trust him.

How can you marry or be with someone who can't get their shit together and then lies on top of it? One day it will be "Baby I paid the light bill" then the lights will go out. "Baby I paid the bills" Then the repo man will come. "Baby she's just a friend" then she'll have his baby.


My sister I have no tolerance for liars and neither should you; if her hasn't learnt that the truth has no friends or enemies; he's not ready for marriage. My advice: Drop him like it's hot.

lunafish said it all perfectly!

Some guys lie, so do some girls abi? But we should always be optimistic, but don't get played in this game of L.I.F.E

@comchi

hhmmm, you mean your guy told you all those lies? gbese repete, The truth is many people tell lies, boys/girls during relationships, which shouldnt be the case.

Just as was said before, the guy was really trying to impress you / measure up. Perhaps he saw you as highly responsible - maybe due to your personal background/whatever info about yourself that you shared with him, maybe he really couldnt measure up if he told you the truth at the first; perhaps you projected yourself as a girl expecting much from a guy, as in you held him in high-regard and he saw the gleam from your eyes that you valued him a lot, and he didnt want to let you down,

I would ask: what warranted his telling you all the truths you are just finding out?

If that you found out some of these truth and decided to confront him about it and he was forced to open up, ok, he lied, you might find it in your heart to give him another chance. If not, let him go.

But if he just calls you and starts making these revelations, then maybe he feels its time to come out straight and start on a new level. Perhaps he truly loves you and wouldnt want to continue in hide and seek anymore.

---------------
I have a story of a girl who lied to her guy that her senior sister was her mom, and actually begged her senior sister to play along, and her senior sister played it well. It so happens that the guys mom was young, in her 40s while the girls mom was a lot way older than the guys mom, with a history of illnesses, so the girl wants to put up a front, that you know, even on the family level, we match kinda ,

I have never told a lie in my entire life.

Afeni:

I have never told a lie in my entire life.

you just lied rite now

guys lie to avoid confrontin issues

oklahoma , but in kenya

aaaaawww, girl - i'm sorry. Well at least you know he's lying. Kick his lying butt and then move on. You don't deserve such a disastrous liar. You deserve more than that

I lie but not this much, this dude needs a PHD!!

Comchi,
your question is one of the most popular and common questions all over the world.
the truth about the answer is that everybody knows why and accept this reason.
to make it look real the 75% of the total population welcome the idea of men's chronic lies.
well if you don't know, THAT IS WHAT THE WOMEN WANT TO HEAR - LIES.

i can see the surprises on ur face. unfortunately everyone is shouting - abormination over your man's lies. they all even have stones in their hands to throw but let anyone who never lie cast the first stone------------ ah their hands are down.

my dear the truth is that we live in a world where lies is the other of the day. congratulations to u that ur man has finally consider u worthy of his truth hence the self confession.

what is confesssion? it is a repentant statement born out of regrets which goes with appologies and unreadiness to repeat same. i was told to err is humane and to forgive is divine. it is easy for women to say am sorry of which i call that statement the national anthem of women but if any man descend so low to tell u that, baby u have to look well before u close that door - celine dione.

Geniver convention of 2005 approves lies on the side of men and pretence on the side of women and since then no amendments have been made and i think it is among the bills the senate rejected alongside the OBJ's third term of which the AIT's lincense was withdrawn.

back to school, for the men advising u to leave that man, hope they are saints. please find out why the man decided to tell u the truth now. find out ur reasons for loving him if they have anything to do with his petty lies. then consider the fact that he must have taken u for one of those girls and now find u worthy to know the truth at this short term instead of placing u on-hold for a long term programe.

well if u have decided to quit the relationship for this reasons then come over to my world(chris_chidi@yahoo.co.uk) as i have been longing to meet a woman who will love me bcs of who i am. i want to be the practical Eddie Murphy.

by the way, who said ladies hate lies?

jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj

some lies are really justified like daretayos' whereas in ur fiancee, his lies are not justified especially knowing he wanna marry u or maybe not

gurl move on with ur life cos Lies generates and give birth to bigger lies. if u wanna stay with him or not, thats ur decision to make.

in order not to break ya heart. i dont lie, i never lie. i always tell the truth even when i lie.

men lie because they r human. and humans always fxck up. i found out that humans aren't perfect.

Yeah is true that men lie but not all men lie. even woman too lie but i'm sorry about this cos it was good enough to lie in order to win your mind, i believe you know what i mean.

This is interesting. There is a board about why girls lie and there is another one about why guys lie. Let's just make it that everybody lies for reasons in a relationship

i thank y'all for ur replies concerning my post.God bless u all.

Just drop him like it's hot. No too much talk because he doesn't deserve it

men have one talent in life that is to lie and you know what they are no good at it. my ex lied about they same thing. what was even worst was when i found out his real age lets just say i did not tell any one how old he was, i think i would have been arrested .

some times they are just scared of being to simple, and of hurting the person they love so one lie becomes two and two becomes three and so on. I will not give you advice on what to do because you are the one in the relationship, so do what is best for you.

In my view, a grown up man who tells lies is not a man. A man is one who stands by his word, his yes means yes and his no means no, So u might need to rephrase that question or find out why children in the bodies of old men still tell lies.

@nobody2 na tru talk b dat.
@comchi dats d real deal,

nobody2, please tell her,

many of us gurls, wants to hear lies, tell them the truth , its too bitter for them,

@ starter of the thread,
Gurl, MEN oh, WOMEN or, baby.oh, ANIMAL, whatever creature , everyone lies, its up to you as a person to understand your mate and assess your relationship, I always and will continue to say it, when u are talking to a man, ASK QUESTIONS , even if you would look like an FBI in front of his eyes,, ASK HIM, if he aint bold enough to answer those questions, thennnnnnnnnn he is definitely holding something out,
Well this is an experience for you, you shoudl learn from it and you should even be thankful. you arent in the relationship anymore cos im sure you'd rather be single than dating a LAYA who lives on deceit, gurl u gon be alright, just part of the experiences,

the funny thing is women lie better than man, sadly,
but im sure when u find the right mate, all those would be by the way side, so move on jare,

The only reason that some guys are liars??
MMMHHHHHHH!!!!! LEMME SEE.
Furst of all, i'm just being honest, guys are ever @$$HOLES!! that's the truth about it, and i'ts coz i've noticed many times, they won't like u to know about the real them, they would just be hidin the realitiness on the ground, and such guys ain't real gentlemen, they'd just be satisfied if they make a really good fool of you, not fool as in jokes but fool as in CHEATIN,

why do men lie?

cause they are Born to do it!

DONT know y guys lie.I f truly u luv urself u will accept each other anyway anyhow.Well if trully u luv him u can marry him

Ask a typical girl what she wants in ha man, and off goes an unrealistic list probably got out of novel or some mushy movie clip, the guy's response is therefore simple, lie at first @least to catch your attention, then prove to you that there's more to him than you previous requirements.

I should say here sha that i DONT lie, i just exaggerate a little

Because they believe they got every reason to