Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego - Jokes Etc (66) - Nairaland
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| Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 7:34pm On Nov 17, 2015 |
Ofego's Mum joined facebook five days ago. This evening she started complaining to Ofego, "Ofego this facebook registration is eating off my money o!". "Mummy I don't understand, how?". Ofego asked. She sighed and said, "Since when I told your younger sister Jessica to register me to facebook, it's money upon money I'm spending". Ofego was confused, and didn't understand what his mum was talking about. But after a while he got a clue and then asked, "Oh, okay, mummy it's Megabyte that is eating off your money!". She raised eye brows and said, "Ah Ofego, which one is Megabyte na? I hope I'm not going to go pay for that one o, because I've paid 10,000 Naira for chatting permit, 12,000 Naira for friend request fee, 4,000 Naira for posting fee, 8,000 Naira for profile picture permit and this evening again, your sister has said that facebook said I should bring 6,000 Naira for international facebook passport, I'm tired Ofego, is this how you people spend money on that thing?". 5 Likes |
| Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by kingsleyugwu: 12:34am On Nov 18, 2015 |
Do You Know You Can Now Locate Your Lost Phone Using Google Search? http://www.learnerstools.com/2015/11/do-you-know-you-can-now-locate-your.html?m=0 1 Share
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| Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by lumenafrica: 2:34pm On Nov 18, 2015 |
Watch This Hilarious Hotel Fight and make sure you share and not enjoy the fight alone. i had to cover it for your viewing pleasure https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-6cx5uaNya0 |
| Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 3:23pm On Nov 18, 2015 |
After church on sunday, Ofego's Wife saw her husband sitting quietly at the sitting room. She got concerned and decided to ask him. "Darling, why are you sitting so quiet? What is it that is bothering you?''. Ofego replied, "I'm still thinking about what the pastor said. It doesn't make me comfortable.'' His Wife asked, ''What is it?''. He replied, ''The pastor confessed he slept with all married and single women in the church but only one woman didn't want to sleep with him.'' Ofego's Wife replied, "It must be that Mrs Koka. She thinks she is better than everyone. Ofego collasped!. 3 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by xploitlaf: 12:30am On Nov 19, 2015 |
COMEDY:cartoon phyno & cartoon olamide in a very funny interview https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BK5NkHPeS-w |
| Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by seunleke1: 11:17am On Nov 20, 2015 |
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| Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by mikesammy(m): 9:55am On Nov 21, 2015 |
njuwo:LWKMD.yo no go kill person abeg |
| Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 3:52pm On Nov 21, 2015 |
A well-worn out 1,000 Naira note and a similarly distressed 10 Naira note arrived at the Central Bank Of Nigeria to be retired. As they moved along the conveyor belt to be burnt, they struck up a conversation. The 1,000 Naira note reminisced about its travels all over the country, "I've had a pretty good life". the 1,000 Naira note proclaimed. "I have been to Lagos, Ibadan, Osogbo, Benin, Port-Harcourt, Kano, and Abuja, the finest restaurants in Victoria Island, Lekki, Abuja and South-South Nigeria. Performances at Muson Centre and Eko Atlantic, the hottest nite clubs all over the country and even a cruise on the Atlantic and Pacific Oceans." "Wow!" screamed the 10 Naira note. "You've really had an exciting life!" "So tell me, says the 1,000 Naira note, "Where have you been throughout your life time?" The 10 Naira note replied, "Oh, I've been to Church Of God Mission, Winners Chapel Church, Christ Embassy Church, ECWA Churches, Apostolic and Methodist Churches, the Redeemed Christian Church of God, the Deeper Life Bible church, Baptist Church, Celestial Church of Christ, the C & S Church, St Peter Catholic Church. . . . ." The 1,000 Naira note interrupted, "What is a church?" "It's a place where believers in Jesus Christ gather to worship God in spirit and in truth", replied the 10 Naira note. "My masters never took me to Church". lamented the 1,000 Naira note. So friends, please, please and please, take your 1,000 Naira notes to Church. They want to know Jesus too!. 1 Like |
| Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by adamondroc(m): 12:10pm On Nov 22, 2015 |
Nigerians are creative and ingenious, whatever the conditions they find themselves in. www.sharemyfame.com.ng 1 Like |
| Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by leookagbare: 12:11am On Nov 24, 2015 |
Bro's, who remember ushbebe From "Ays Crib"?. If you do, follow this link to watch or download one of him comedy video. LMAO  , THIS VIDEO TO FUNNY ABEg. just watch and see d kind English.... download video here. http://medianehd.com/2015/11/comedy-skit-ushbebe-ft-toyin-aimakhu-arabinrin/ |
| Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by NollyScoop: 2:38pm On Nov 26, 2015 |
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| Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 8:31am On Nov 27, 2015 |
Ofego and his Wife were travelling to America by air, as they were at the peak of the journey, the pilot announced, "Ladies and gentlemen, we are sorry to announce that one of the engines has stopped working while the remaining one is not functioning as required, therefore, we may crash in a few minutes from now. We advise that everyone should reconcile with God and settle every issues that need to be settled in order to make Heaven.” At that point, Ofego touched his wife Mercy and said, “Honey, please forgive me, your sister that stays with us is my sex machine, we had several abortions, she has even planned to poison you on our return from America so that the both of us will elope to London please find a place in your heart to forgive me. She responded, "No problem dear”. She then said, "Since it's confession time, let me also confess. Please you must also forgive me, Onos and Karo out of our three children are not your biological children. Your biological child is Tobias, the rest belongs to Akpos your best friend. You also remember you were robbed by armed robbers last year?" Ofego answered, "Yes I remember". She continued, "I was actually the one that sent the armed robbers to rob you because I needed money to pay for my boyfriend's school fees. Even now sef, as we are talking so, I have arranged for your death through hired assassins on our return from this trip.” Ofego responded, “No problem I have forgiven you.” Meanwhile as the confessions were going on, the pilot announced, “Ladies and gentlemen, is like you people are powerful men and women of faith because God has answered your prayers, the two engines are perfectly okay now and we are now sure of safe landing." At that point, the whole passengers became mute instead of celebrating the goodnews. One of the passengers shouted, "Pilot, pilot, this plane must crash o, or we will crash the plane!". Everybody echoed, "Yes oooo!!!!. 1 Like |
| Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by mrbells: 3:31pm On Nov 27, 2015 |
found this awesome Nigerian social network were u can meet cool people ...www.friendshare.com.ng 1 Share
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| Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by deyvidoris: 8:00pm On Nov 27, 2015 |
Some of these jokes are kinda lame, wanna see something juicy...check out this fresh story on YEMI ALADE http://www.globalafricana.com/2015/11/26/yemi-alade-how-that-yoruba-ibo-girl-became-an-african-superstar/ |
| Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 7:21am On Nov 28, 2015 |
Ofego and his secretary were having an affair. One afternoon they couldn't contain their passion, so they rushed over to her place where they spent the afternoon making passionate love. When they were finished, they fell asleep, not waking up until 8 o'clock that night. They got dressed quickly. Then he asked his secretary to take his shoes outside and rub them on the grass. Bewildered, she did as he asked, thinking him pretty weird. He finally got home and his wife met him at the door. Upset, she asked where he had been. He replied, "I cannot lie. My secretary and I are having an affair. Today we left work early, went to her place, spent the afternoon making love, and then fell asleep. That's why I'm late." His wife looked at him, took notice of his shoes, and yelled, "I can see those are grass stains on your shoes. You liar! You've been playing golf again, haven't you?" . |
| Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 6:18am On Nov 30, 2015 |
Two Nigerian Soldiers were having a chat during their free time. First Soldier: Why did you join the army? Second Soldier: I didn't have a wife and I loved war. So I joined. How about you? Why did you join the army? First Soldier: I had a wife and I loved peace. So I joined. |
| Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 11:08am On Nov 30, 2015 |
Ofego met a Prostitute in a bar. She said, "This is your lucky night sir. I've got a special game for you. I'll do absolutely anything you want for 2,000 Naira, as long as you can say it in three words.” Ofego pulled out his wallet and placed 2,000 Naira on the table, and said slowly, "Paint my house." 1 Like |
| Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 8:18am On Dec 01, 2015 |
A Tall Woman met a Midget at a party. The Midget was barely three feet tall but they were attracted to each other. After a few drinks they went back to the tall woman's apartment. "I can't imagine what it will be like making love to a midget," said the woman, "Especially with the size difference and all." "Just take off your cloths, lie back on the bed, spread your legs apart and close your eyes," said the midget. The woman did as she was told and soon she felt the biggest thing she had ever experienced inside her. Within a few minutes the woman had climaxed eight times. "If you think that was good," said the midget with a smile, "Just wait till I get both legs in there!" . 1 Like |
| Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by kihemeje96(f): 12:23pm On Dec 01, 2015 |
These Photos Of Striking Resemblance Between People And Animals Or Objects By Amazing People Get You Laughing: See more photos on; http://www.news-world-update.com/2015/12/these-photos-of-striking-resemblance.html
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| Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 9:35am On Dec 02, 2015 |
An employee phoned up his Boss, but
got the boss' wife instead, "I'm afraid he
died last week." She explained. The next
day the man called again and asked for
the boss. "I told you" the wife replied,
"He died last week." The next day he called again and once more asked to
speak to his boss. By this time the wife
was getting upset and shouted, "I've
already told you twice, my husband,
your boss, died last week! Why do you
keep calling?" . "Cause, . . ." he replied laughing, "I just love hearing it. " 1 Like |
| Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 8:40am On Dec 03, 2015 |
A little boy and a little girl
in a bathtub were having
a bath. Suddenly the little
girl looked down at the
boy. "Can I touch it?" "No
way! The boy replied, "You already broke yours
off!" |
| Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 12:55pm On Dec 03, 2015 |
Dad!. It was Mekus,
Ofego's five year old son,
calling from the
bathroom. "My
toothbrush fell into the
toilet!'. "Let's get you another one." Ofego said,
throwing it away. 'That's
full of germs now.' The
next thing Ofego knew, he
was handing him his
toothbrush. 'Then we better throw this one
away too. I dropped it in
the toilet last week." |
| Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by hussain230(m): 4:32pm On Dec 03, 2015 |
for whatsapp group joke and lessons for both sex add this number if you have interest 08072923043 |
| Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by callmekendall(m): 10:33am On Dec 04, 2015 |
njuwo:
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| Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by Nobody: 10:19pm On Dec 04, 2015 |
Ladies and gentlemen, who do you think will die first?? |
| Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 8:03am On Dec 05, 2015 |
Ten Commandments Of
Marriage; Commandment
1. Marriages are made in
Heaven. But so again, are
thunder and lightning.
Commandment 2. If you want your spouse to listen
and pay strict attention to
every word you say, talk
in your sleep.
Commandment 3.
Marriage is grand and divorce is at least 100
grand! Commandment 4.
Married life is very
frustrating. In the first
year of marriage, the man
speaks and the woman listens. In the second year,
the woman speaks and
the man listens. In the
third year, they both
speak and the neighbours
listen. Commandment 5. When a man opens the
door of his car for his wife,
you can be sure of one
thing; Either the car is new
or the wife is.
Commandment 6. Marriage is when a man
and woman become as
one; the trouble starts
when they try to decide
which one. Commandment
7. Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night
thinking about something
you said. After marriage,
he will fall asleep before
you finish. Commandment
8. Every man wants a wife who is beautiful,
understanding,
economical, and a good
cook. But the law allows
only one wife.
Commandment 9. Every woman wants a man who
is handsome,
understanding,
economical and a
considerate lover, but
again, the law allows only one husband.
Commandment 10. Man is
incomplete until he
marries. After that, he is
finished. 1 Like 1 Share |
| Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by Transformium: 9:18pm On Dec 05, 2015 |
njuwo: |
| Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by kazberg12: 7:23pm On Dec 06, 2015 |
www.tnijurl.com/learnmoney Get paid men! |
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