A lady friend of mine has a very committed relationship and they are walking down the aisle soon but my friend has a secret she wanna tell her boyfriend(she said her conscience has not been too friendly with her on this issue). The thing is, she once dated an old and married man when she freshly graduated hoping he would help her secure a job (because she came out with a 3rd class) and help in some financial aspects too because they were virtually feeding from hand to mouth then. The man in question happens to be very influential and was promising to get her into NPA or NNPC (because my friend studied Chemistry). To cut this long story short, this man was just posting this lady and got nothing done 4 her as regards job, though she said he helped a little financially.
Her confusion now is, she wants to open up to her fiance before they finally tie d knot but her bf is the type that tells all (dat she's told him abt her) to whoever cares to listen whenever they have misunderstanding. He keeps referring to issues that are meant to be long 4gotten each time they have an argument. He'd call her Uncle or Mum to report to them and in the course slips out what is meant to stay btw dem (some mistakes she made even b4 she met him).
Now the question is, should she tell him about this man? I initially told her to go ahead but when she told me about the reporting and all, then I said we should bring this to NL and hear people's opinion. Please we need your candid piece of mind on this. Thanks all.

The guy is a nairalander but the babe isn't, I'll sure give her every piece from here.

You dated someone at one time or
another it ended and you moved on.
Keep the details to yourself....

@op marriage is a very complicated issue that i dont think should be handled with kids glove(am just a teen probably single but believe me i always partake when mariage disputes are being resolved)
usualy most of this disputes are generated due to lack of trust.
If she refuse to tell her husband to be about her secret financer then she should get ready for what wil come out later.
I think the problem here is not whether he should tel him or not cause she has to do that,i think she has to find a way to diplomaticaly inform his new dude.but from the description of this guy that wants to marry her i think he is not man enough to get maried.

Enegod: You dated someone at one time or
another it ended and you moved on.
Keep the details to yourself....

I always look forward to seeing u comment on issues cos you always display a level of maturity that others should emulate.

@op, your friend can choose to tell her husband or not but the fact still remains that even he has a few skeletons in his cupboard and she should not feel that she knows everything about him just cos he's going to marry her. her past is her past and should have no bearing on her future with her fiance. if he does not understand that then he has no reason being in a relationship talk less of getting married

What happened in Vegas...stays in Vegas.

The guy appears to be 'not quite there yet'. It's better you keep it to yourself if his chances of finding out are slim.

He will judge you really really badly, if you tell him you slept with a married man. Guess a girl did what a girl had to do at that point.

Yeah and I know you're the person too.

I see no reason why she should tell him..... it's her past and some things r better untold.. we all have secrets dis is not a complicated secret like not having a womb, especially d guy being d type dat kips using what Shez said against her....

Why would she even think of telling him such thing, Its a past pls. Thought it was even something serious. Let her relax and enjoy her new life.

Enegod: You dated someone at one time or
another it ended and you moved on.
Keep the details to yourself....

Hmm....tnx

Kelechi2020: @op marriage is a very complicated issue that i dont think should be handled with kids glove(am just a teen probably single but believe me i always partake when mariage disputes are being resolved)
usualy most of this disputes are generated due to lack of trust.
If she refuse to tell her husband to be about her secret financer then she should get ready for what wil come out later.
I think the problem here is not whether he should tel him or not cause she has to do that,i think she has to find a way to diplomaticaly inform his new dude.but from the description of this guy that wants to marry her i think he is not man enough to get maried.

my thought initially too, because I was made 2 understand dat d man is a family friend.

Richfella: What happened in Vegas...stays in Vegas.

The guy appears to be 'not quite there yet'. It's better you keep it to yourself if his chances of finding out are slim.

He will judge you really really badly, if you tell him you slept with a married man. Guess a girl did what a girl had to do at that point.

Yeah and I know you're the person too.

believe it or not, I am not d person...but tnx 4 d piece

Bootylicious: I see no reason why she should tell him..... it's her past and some things r better untold.. we all have secrets dis is not a complicated secret like not having a womb, especially d guy being d type dat kips using what Shez said against her....

kk...tnx

Tnx evry1