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American Military History (in Brief) - Politics - Nairaland

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American Military History (in Brief) by MagicBishop: 3:56pm On Nov 18, 2013
European Imperialists and Religious Fanatics invade the continent.

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Re: American Military History (in Brief) by MagicBishop: 3:59pm On Nov 18, 2013
The Outcome: a massacre of genocidal proportions.

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Re: American Military History (in Brief) by MagicBishop: 4:02pm On Nov 18, 2013
Group of European Aristocrats hatch plan to break away from British Commonwealth owing to financial obligation to the crown.

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Re: American Military History (in Brief) by MagicBishop: 4:03pm On Nov 18, 2013
Hillbilly American revolution stages massive military fluke ever and gets independence

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Re: American Military History (in Brief) by MagicBishop: 4:07pm On Nov 18, 2013
Newly formed Nation picks fight again with neighboring Canada a joint protectorate of both Britain and France in a feeble attempt of empire formation.

Britain and Canada end up defeating hill billy hicks.

White House gets burnt to the ground

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Re: American Military History (in Brief) by MagicBishop: 4:11pm On Nov 18, 2013
Britain wonders why it's dumb runaway cousin attempted such a stup1d move.

Britain goes back to more important task of Empire building around the world.

American President Jefferson sells books in personal library to pay for damages to white house.

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Re: American Military History (in Brief) by MagicBishop: 4:15pm On Nov 18, 2013
Mexican Border is invaded by border-hopping gringos who refuse to learn the language and assimilate within the local population

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Re: American Military History (in Brief) by MagicBishop: 4:18pm On Nov 18, 2013
Texas goes insane in a desperate move to preserve their stolen, slave managed lands within Mexico
The Mexico war begins.

The battle of Alamo.

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Re: American Military History (in Brief) by MagicBishop: 4:19pm On Nov 18, 2013
Texas wins one of the easiest wars in history. Texas then joins the United states.

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Re: American Military History (in Brief) by MagicBishop: 4:22pm On Nov 18, 2013
Part of the Union secede from the United States in order to maintain slavery.

The Civil war begins

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Re: American Military History (in Brief) by MagicBishop: 4:24pm On Nov 18, 2013
Americans basically fight each other to maintain an inhumane social and employment structure long after the rest of the world has long condemned and banned slavery

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Re: American Military History (in Brief) by MagicBishop: 4:28pm On Nov 18, 2013
Americans decide to move west into Indian territory after end of civil war.

Millions of Red Indians are brutally massacred and their land pristine landscape is forever destroyed.

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Re: American Military History (in Brief) by MagicBishop: 4:32pm On Nov 18, 2013
After wiping out most of the Red Indians, the US tries it's hand at empire building in the Phillipines.

American aggressors are able to defeat the unprepared Spanish colonialists. The US commits mass atrocities and tens of thousands die from the carnage and disease.

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Re: American Military History (in Brief) by MagicBishop: 4:36pm On Nov 18, 2013
War rages in Europe while the US remains neutral and goes after the remaining Red Indians.

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Re: American Military History (in Brief) by MagicBishop: 4:39pm On Nov 18, 2013
America finally arrives at the last minute and takes credit for winning the war

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Re: American Military History (in Brief) by MagicBishop: 4:45pm On Nov 18, 2013
America enters the second world war after Japs bomb a colonial naval base in Hawaii. The Indian massacre was temporarily suspended.

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Re: American Military History (in Brief) by MagicBishop: 4:49pm On Nov 18, 2013
America eventually defeats the the batsh1t insane Japs by committing the greatest mass murder ever after all efforts in conventional warring fail to defeat the Crazy Japs.

Over 300,000 Civilians are killed.

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Re: American Military History (in Brief) by wasak(m): 4:50pm On Nov 18, 2013
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Re: American Military History (in Brief) by MagicBishop: 4:52pm On Nov 18, 2013
America then decided to enter the European campaign at the very last minute when all the warring factions are exhausted.

America shamelessly claims credit for this victory

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Re: American Military History (in Brief) by MagicBishop: 4:56pm On Nov 18, 2013
America considers herself a champion of democracy (and capitalism) tries to stop communist north korea from indoctrinating feeble south korea.

North Korea kicks U.S. a$$ and the conflict is still technically raging as the longest war in modern times.

U.S. feels it won, but North Korea knows it's the Best Korea

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Re: American Military History (in Brief) by MagicBishop: 4:59pm On Nov 18, 2013
Aftermath of the Korean War is millions dead, the most militarized border, longest on going war and a hair trigger nuke world.

Look at what American aggression has made Korea into. A paranoid schizoid Nation ruled by a small pr1ck spoilt brat who has nukes by the way

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Re: American Military History (in Brief) by MagicBishop: 5:02pm On Nov 18, 2013
Not learning from their FAIL in North Korea, American Generals look for a saving grace with lil ol' Cuba.

Employing exile Cuban thugs, the American army plans a beach invasion of the small Island ofCuba

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Re: American Military History (in Brief) by MagicBishop: 5:04pm On Nov 18, 2013
Cuba defeats the aggressors mercilessly and we get to see Castro smoking a Cuban Cohiban Cigar for the next 40years

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Re: American Military History (in Brief) by MagicBishop: 5:05pm On Nov 18, 2013
Cuba remains Capitalist free with the highest literacy rate in the western hemisphere and also the best health care as well.

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Re: American Military History (in Brief) by daffur: 5:06pm On Nov 18, 2013
great piece. l luv this concise summary of the volumes of books l read on it.

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Re: American Military History (in Brief) by MagicBishop: 5:08pm On Nov 18, 2013
American turns her wrath to Vietnam for no just cause but to avoid ridicule from the Cuban debacle

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Re: American Military History (in Brief) by MagicBishop: 5:09pm On Nov 18, 2013
As usual innocent civilians are deliberately killed.

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Re: American Military History (in Brief) by MagicBishop: 5:11pm On Nov 18, 2013
Eventually Charlie proves to damn pesky and hard to kill.

Americans call it quits

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Re: American Military History (in Brief) by MagicBishop: 5:13pm On Nov 18, 2013
Eventually the good guys win and they issue a stamp in memory of their victory, not a statue or a building but a postage stamp.

Americans are now wondering how come empire building is so darn hard

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Re: American Military History (in Brief) by MagicBishop: 5:20pm On Nov 18, 2013
After a null period of out right war (relying more on counter insurgency and covet warfare) the US, decides to help another despotic buddy against another.

Gulf War begins.

Although brilliantly carried out, this war was a copycat of the German Blitz Screen of Europe and only daft goat farkers like sadam will not see it coming.

The US also bombs the sh1t out of sadams bases, bases they helped build by the way ( so much for intelligence)

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Re: American Military History (in Brief) by MagicBishop: 5:29pm On Nov 18, 2013
Not too long afterwards the US tries to interfere with the Somalis thinking all those life saver jokes on Somalis will make this a stroll in the park.

Nah. Somalis take down multi-million dollar helicopters with 300 dollar Russian RPGs.

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Re: American Military History (in Brief) by MagicBishop: 5:32pm On Nov 18, 2013
American Military dulling inspires frenzied Somali Nationalistic and Islamic fervor.

Aftermath:

All Somalis are expert RPG shooters and keep wondering why the US will not invade them again.

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