As I turn face madam, na plenty tings jus
enter my head, wetin I wan tell madam?
Which kain lie I go take lie wey my
punishment go reduce? As I don dey used to
this place, e no go too sweet to return go back
to the place wey my papa and mama dey
stay. I no talk say I no like my papa and
mama o, before una turn to dey curse me but
I don big pass the place wey dem dey stay
and no be mouth. A girl suppose aim for the
skies na, abi no be so? As madam wan open
mouth shout again na im I jus fall for ground
dey roll.
“Mary! What’s this? What’s happening?” The
kain fear wey enter my madam voice be wan
make me laff but dem no born me well to try
am.
“Jesus tank you, father tank you.” I stop to
dey roll come begin dey shake. Na dat
moment oga comot from baffroom. All this
time e bin dey listen to music for inside the
baffroom, so the man no kukuma hear all the
wahala wey bin dey go on.
“Holy crap! What’s this?!”
“Well, I came in and saw her naked. She was
actually bent waist down in front of…”
“Stop! Stop!! Is this…like a set-up or what?”
The fear wey dey my oga voice no be small
one.
“Baby, are you even listening to what I am
saying. Are you saying that you did not know
Mary was in the room? Is it a coincidence
that you were in the bathroom and she was
ready to leave the room?”
“What in heaven’s name are you talking
about? And why have you left her uncovered?
Gosh, baby, sometimes you need to take
things one step at a time.”
“And what’s that supposed to mean?”
“It means you should have ensured that she
was covered especially as you saw that I was
getting out of the shower and not leave all of
her shaking like that.”
“Really all of her, why pretend you haven’t
seen it all?”
“Thanks to you, now I have.”
As I see say the ting fit bring kata kata
between dem two, na im I sit up. As dem see
me, both of dem keep quiet, oga wey no tie
towel before quick quick grab one tie, madam
jus pull dia bed sheet take cover my body.
“What were you doing here, Mary?” Madam
use jeje voice ask me.
“Oga, madam no vex. Na help I bin dey help
una.”
“Help who? By sleeping with my husband?
Baby, I thought you said…”
“Na one prophet ma!” If I no interrupt
madam, e fit turn to something else. “The
prophet talk say if I no dance naked for every
room of the house wey I bin dey stay say the
person wey dey hold your belle make you no
born pickin go succeed.”
“Why would you believe such crap? Oh Mary,
you are so silly! Has it ever occurred to you or
your prophet that we might be into family
planning?”
Yes, e better make I dey silly. “But madam,
the man dream dey come to pass. E bin
dream one time say my papa work go finish
and the ting happen.”
“Well, hasn’t he had any good dreams like
you being crowned Miss Nigeria or winning
the ‘who wants to be a millionaire’ show?” My
oga fit use style style yab pesin.
“I no know sir, I no be God.”
“Didn’t you know oga was in the room or
didn’t you even hear him come into the
house?”
“Whenever I dey spirit I no dey hear anyting
around me and …”
“Well, needless to say Mary, you nearly
caused a catastrophe between my wife and I.
Next time…”
“Next time? Baby, seriously I don’t think
there will be a next time. I will not be
comfortable having her around here
anymore.”
“Come on! Where’s the carefree, forgiving
woman I married? I think Mary’s problem
stems from illiteracy; she should be a
challenge to you. Perhaps she needs to start
school. A literate mind wouldn’t easily be
conned by a fraudulent prophet and let’s not
forget that she thought she was doing us a
favor.”
Kai, my rep don suffer; shey na me be
illiterate? I fit vex now talk de whole truth, if
dem like make dem chase me comot but as I
think am more, e be like say e go better make
I go school sef, at least make I sabi speak
engrish small.
“Let’s talk about this later, after she is out of
our room and besides I don’t like your
defending her. Mary go to your room.” As she
see say I bin wan comot the bedsheet…”No,
don’t remove that. Just go! Make sure you
take it to the laundry later.”
“Oga tank you, madam tank you. God go
bless una, for my life I no go believe dat
prophet again. God tank…” Kai, e be like say
na next time wen dem don comot na im I go
come carry my wrapper wey dey inside
wardrobe be dat.
“Mary, just go!”
As I bin dey comot, na im I hear oga ask
madam, “So, how did you say she was bent…
I mean how did you find her again?” E be like
say my oga take style style get small craze,
how im go ask madam dat kain question?
Omo men e no concern me sha but na so I
bin take escape and na so I bin take start
school. Who talk say Warri girl dey carry last?
STORY CONTINUES AFTER NEW YEAR

i want comctructive criticism on my stories abeg...no insults!

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Lol. Very funny. The girl na sharp girl!!

hmmm cari mat put 4 ground sit dwn dy wait 4 hu go join me. E clear say dis cinema 4 my villa go tough wel wel.

its dope bro...absolutely love it!

Lol.. Kolo gal

Nice story

Funny story.

Good story.. @least I enjoyed this update

who rite this tory? thats a good comedi 4 d year. nice try.

https://www.nairaland.com/1573119/d-d-after-christmas-gobe ....check Dis thread out :p

dexpotter: hmmm cari mat put 4 ground sit dwn dy wait 4 hu go join me. E clear say dis cinema 4 my villa go tough wel wel.

Bros, abeg shift small make I follow you share the mat...see pop corn here o, if you no mind...

Copy and paste thingzzzz, I've read this story before..