eldee:

The way you say it, one will think men turned from Romeos to Bin Ladens in one day
All we want is sex?? Blame us for knowing what we want?
Why buy a CD-ROM when you can download on I-tunes?
Besides, it's not like guys became rapists or sumn, it's always mutual
I don't see why guys get to take the blame

Missus, where do you see these guys?

i am too sure that there are nice guys out there

because i even met one on Nairaland, he lives in the USA

and is completely appalled at what some brothers do.

eldee:

The way you say it, one will think men turned from Romeos to Bin Ladens in one day
All we want is sex?? Blame us for knowing what we want?
Why buy a CD-ROM when you can download on I-tunes?
Besides, it's not like guys became rapists or sumn, it's always mutual
I don't see why guys get to take the blame

Im not saying blame it on the guys, i know it takes two to tango but what is the point in tryin to be romantic with a guy that just want SEX SEX AND SEX ONLY. like you said Why buy a CD-ROM when you can download on I-tunes.

Busta:

You guys don't seem to get the issue or the case.
Don't we all want to get married and have kids before the age of 30?
having kids before the age of 30 is not the big deal . . .u can go on the street and get a man to knock u up or get married to any guy for the case of having before the age of 30.

This is the issue of settling down with the right man . . .where are they? they are all dead and have disappeared.
it is about finding the right man that will stick by you till the end . . love and cherish you to the end.

Guys this these will only shag the living daylight out of you . . .and once u tell them u are preggers, they will scram or tell u to take it out.

i know what you mean my dear, i am still waiting for a guy to give me reasonable answer here

Gamine:

Missus, where do you see these guys?

i[b] am too sure that there are nice guys out there[/b]

because i even met one on Nairaland, he lives in the USA

and is completely appalled at what some brothers do.

i am sure the percentage of that is 2%

tope2000:

i am sure the percentage of that is 2%

not true

tope2000:

i am sure the percentage of that is 2%

SHUT UP THERE _{ur mouth like 50cent!}

Brash alone is 20% so definitely that is more than 2%!

Brash!:

SHUT UP THERE _{your mouth like 50cent!}

Brash alone is 20% so definitely that is more than 2%!

Lmao
babe i already said u know a woman's worth

tope2000:

Lmao
babe i already said u know a woman's worth

u know wat we do!

_{omo daaada ni e jare i loff u}

tope2000:

i am sure the percentage of that is 2%

I am sure the presentage is higher than that but not by much.  If you really want a good guy you have to look to older more mature men.

Boys between the ages of 19-35 are still boys and not men yet (most not all).  This is only based on my personal experience.

That being said it presents a real problem for young sistas now coming up. I am not sure if it goes back to how the moms and dads are raising the young boys and not showing them how to respect women or if this is just some innate, in bread thing that is in them.

I dont wish to be young again and trying to find love.

Brash!:

u know what we do!

_{omo daaada ni e jare i loff u}

sistawoman:

I am sure the presentage is higher than that but not by much. If you really want a good guy you have to look to older more mature men.

Boys between the ages of 19-35 are still boys and not men yet (most not all). This is only based on my personal experience.

That being said it presents a real problem for young sistas now coming up. I am not sure if it goes back to how the moms and dads are raising the young boys and not showing them how to respect women or if this is just some innate, in bread thing that is in them.

I don't wish to be young again and trying to find love.

So what u are trying to sy is that i have be with sum1 that is old enuff to be my uncle b4 i find romance
Now that i dont believe.

Romance went dead due to the outbreak of women; these days, any where you go is women; even the younger once are meeting up with the standard, there boobs come out as early as 13; and Nigerian music opens their eye so quickly, the whole system is acumulated. Therefore, ROMANCE is no where to be found.

sistawoman:

I am sure the presentage is higher than that but not by much.  If you really want a good guy you have to look to older more mature men.

Boys between the ages of 19-35 are still boys and not men yet (most not all).  This is only based on my personal experience.

That being said it presents a real problem for young sistas now coming up. I am not sure if it goes back to how the moms and dads are raising the young boys and not showing them how to respect women or if this is just some innate, in bread thing that is in them.

I don't wish to be young again and trying to find love.  

U are darn right about that. All what these guys wants to do is just shag away . . . they know nuthin about romance and a woman's worth. Imagine dating a guy for a year and half and he wakes up one day to tell u that he's no longer interested and he now wants to focus on his career and his immediate family . . . I mean, this guy is 29yrs old . . after y'all been dating for one and half years, meeting his family and he met urs, and you thinking he is the one, building and sharing future dreams with him and he suddenly remembered he has a career?? . . .how selfish and self centered.

@ sistawoman, Ain't you lucky?

LOL.

last i checked

Maturity wasnt by Age

tope2000:



So what u are trying to sy is that i have be with someone that is old enough to be my uncle before i find romance
Now that i don't believe.

LMAO . . . I think she was talking about her experiences . . .don't have to apply to everyone . . .never the same cases.

Busta:

LMAO . . . I think she was talking about her experiences . . .don't have to apply to everyone . . .never the same cases.

OH OK

sistawoman:

I am sure the presentage is higher than that but not by much.  If you really want a good guy you have to look to older more mature men.

Boys between the ages of 19-35 are still boys and not men yet (most not all).  This is only based on my personal experience.

That being said it presents a real problem for young sistas now coming up. I am not sure if it goes back to how the moms and dads are raising the young boys and not showing them how to respect women or if this is just some innate, in bread thing that is in them.

I don't wish to be young again and trying to find love.  

where did u get dis from

wat has maturity got to do wt age,there r 40-45 year old men dat still have their asses tucked up in their shoes,so wat exactly r u talking about here madam?

Boys between the ages of 19-35 are still boys and not men yet (most not all). This is only based on my personal experience.

people oh . . . the girl is only talking from her personal experiences and not from any proven fact and statistics.

rampant:

where did u get this from

what has maturity got to do wt age,there r 40-45 year old men that still have their asses tucked up in their shoes,so what exactly r u talking about here madam?

My personal experiences.  I have not done any research, conducted any interviews, or anything else.  Like i said in my orginal post just my personal experiences.

@Busta
I am lucky in the sense that I have loved and lost and been treated badly and good and in all those experenices I was able to put together my list of what i will accept and what i wont, what will make me happy and what wont.  Because I had already been married, had all the children i wanted I was able to sit back and just date and try to figure out if i wanted another husband or just wanted bfs.  I was able to pick and choose and my tolerance level was much lower so i did not put up with BS from these men.

In that way I have been lucky.  But like I said I would not want to be 20somthing for nothing in the world.  I was terrified when i turned 30 but getting older has been such a blessing.

sorry to say this but i think she migt have been d imature one in d relationship since shes talking about experience here

im saying this because smtimes 87% of this imaturity comes from the women,and instead of them to accept it,they go carry d blame to them men


let her come let me show her my first cousins husband who will be turning 43 come november,and still acting like an imatured only God knows what

Men Bashing has resumed in earnest.

This is directed at the women - care to know why men do these things and get away with it? Because A LARGE PROPORTION OF WOMEN OUT THERE MAKE THEM BELIEVE THEY CAN!!

In the 'good ol days' a man would not get sex unless he married a woman, so by the time his hormones were acting up too much, he'd have to get the rest of his life in shape to get any of that action - in the process, he cleans up his act, gets matured and actually looks deeply at what he wants and goes for it.

These days, men can get sex on a dime, so why bother to go through all the nonsense called 'romance' to get it? Especially when all you hear from women is 'the man who will love ME, and cherish ME and be with ME and take care of ME' In their next breath they will be declaring independence.

The bottom line is, women are confused as to what they really want.

Men are not mature? Well maybe not, but if circumstances around them demanded maturity, then it would come - as long as they can continue to get by doing nonsense all over the place, you'll only find the few determined and self driven men who have decided to do the right thing by themselves.

rampant:

sorry to say this but i think she migt have been d imature one in d relationship since shes talking about experience here

im saying this because smtimes 87% of this imaturity comes from the women,and instead of them to accept it,they go carry d blame to them men


let her come let me show her my first cousins husband who will be turning 43 come november,and still acting like an imatured only God knows what

Yes it does happen.  Some people, men or women never growup.  Some, men or women, are never cut out to be in relationships.  That is why you DATE them.

I never took a poll, i never did any research.  I am speaking from personal experience only.

There are exceptions to every rule, to every circumstance.  Does that mean that the whole theory is flawed?

debosky:

Men Bashing has resumed in earnest.

This is directed at the women - care to know why men do these things and get away with it? Because A LARGE PROPORTION OF WOMEN OUT THERE MAKE THEM BELIEVE THEY CAN!!
In the 'good ol days' a man would not get sex unless he married a woman, so by the time his hormones were acting up too much, he'd have to get the rest of his life in shape to get any of that action - in the process, he cleans up his act, gets matured and actually looks deeply at what he wants and goes for it.

These days, men can get sex on a dime, so why bother to go through all the nonsense called 'romance' to get it? Especially when all you hear from women is 'the man who will love ME, and cherish ME and be with ME and take care of ME' In their next breath they will be declaring independence.

The bottom line is, women are confused as to what they really want.

Men are not mature? Well maybe not, but if circumstances around them demanded maturity, then it would come - as long as they can continue to get by doing nonsense all over the place, you'll only find the few determined and self driven men who have decided to do the right thing by themselves.

Amen
at last

DEBO . . . .scram abeg . . .as if you mean know what you want.
don't even get me started with u today o.

Like someone said:

Men always say that we chics don't know what we want,and have u noticed that they want a sex tigress,
- a good cook,
- a homemaker,
- a woman that can hold her own financially,
- a well dressed woman,
- an intelligent woman,
- a good mother (not only 4 d kids o,including him)
- a beautiful accessory that every other man would turn green when dey see,
- a sister to talk to,
- a woman who takes very good care of them when they r ill,
- a woman who would cook for him n his buddies when there is a football match,
- a woman that,
the list is endless and u ave to posses super human powers to ave all these.
now who do u think doesn't know what they want

maybe we shld draw up our endless list as well,
will they even ave up to 5 of dese qualities?

no matter how 'wife material' u r
no matter how many times or places u ave sex in a day,
no matter how flexible ur bones r for karmasutra,
no matter how u kiss his siblings behinds 2 buy their vote,
no matter how much time u spend on BBC FOOD checking out new recipes 4 his meals,
no matter how low u stoop to appear submissive and respectful,
no matter how much efforts u put in ur looks,
wen a man wants to walk he will run so fast it'll make u dizzy and also blow watever scared him out of proportion in a way dat any1 who cares to listen will believe him.

Rotflmao! Interesting write up.  

The greatest trick HALLMARK and HOLLYWOOD ever pulled was convincing the world (re: Women) there is something called ROMANCE. Girls, this is gonna be hard to take in but the earlier the better. . .

There's no Tooth Fairy
Santa Clause is your daddy with fake beard
And there is no Prince Charming galloping on his horse coming to sweep you off your feet.

Look at the guy sitting next to you and ask yourself. . .

In 30 yrs, will I still find the way he is picking his nose like he's digging for treasure funny?
In 35 yrs will I still find the way he belches like a whale cute?
In 40 yrs when he is bald, waddling into the house with his pot belly, will be able to look at him and say "oh yeah, that's mah man! All Mine?"

If you can honestly answer yes, you better start wording your Wedding Invites because. . .  Ladies, that nose picking, whale belching, soon to be bald and Pot bellied guy is your Prince Charming and if you're still particular about the riding on the horse part, just pretend it is in the stable of your castle (Oh yeah, that's another thing, banish all castle fantasies. . . you'll be lucky to get a 3 bedroom, 3 bathroom home. Not Epe oh, just reality)

Wats guan ina di place?Another male bashing thread eh?Only had to look at the topic,didn't bother to read the posts. Pleeeeaaazzzzz ladies get a grip.

cold:

Wats guan ina di place?Another male bashing thread eh?Only had to look at the topic,didn't bother to read the posts. Pleeeeaaazzzzz ladies get a grip.

next time  . . .don't open your mouth without reading the posts and just conclude that this is about male bashing only.
being judgemental and riding to conclusion will lead u no where. pele . . .Mr (Chief) I too know!

Its a general topic,
- African mentality
- Men in general
- Women
- relationships and marriages.

I don't see any male bashing.

Jeez! You guys are so freaking sensitive,

Sometimes I wonder. . . . What do we want with them again?

Okay, okay. . . that was bashing but you seem like you wanted it.

Didn't wanna disappoint, ya know.

cold:

Wats guan ina di place?Another male bashing thread eh?Only had to look at the topic,didn't bother to read the posts. Pleeeeaaazzzzz ladies get a grip.

You should read them and you will find that not everyone is bashing males.

Sisikill:


Look at the guy sitting next to you and ask yourself. . .

In 30 years, will I still find the way he is picking his nose like he's digging for treasure funny?
In 35 years will I still find the way he belches like a whale cute?
In 40 years when he is bald, waddling into the house with his pot belly, will be able to look at him and say "oh yeah, that's mah man! All Mine?"

If you can honestly answer yes, you better start wording your Wedding Invites because. . .  Ladies, that nose picking, whale belching, soon to be bald and Pot bellied guy is your Prince Charming and if you're still particular about the riding on the horse part, just pretend it is in the stable of your castle (Oh yeah, that's another thing, banish all castle fantasies. . . you'll be lucky to get a 3 bedroom, 3 bathroom home. Not Epe oh, just reality)

This is exactly what men and women should be asking themselves before they get married.  lets take it a step futher if the day after you say i do your wife/husband is hit by a bus and you have to change thier diapers everyday, feed them and put on thier clothes are you willing to do that?  If you cant see yourself doing that then this is not the person you need to marry.

But i will not agree that Prince Charming does not exist.  I will not agree that he does not ride a horse and come sweeping you off your feet.  Because he does, i know cuz i married him, pot belly, picking nose, bald head, changing diapers and all.

@ Busta

the truth is bitter.

Men know what they want, if you hear a man making such excuses, maybe he's not really interested and was using you for companionship.

Women should get all these unrealistic notions of romance out of their heads. There are men willing to do a heck of a lot to please a woman, but when UNREALISTIC expectations are set by either man or woman it is doomed to FAIL.

Women tend to fail most at this part because their heads have been filled with nonsense since childhood about a romantic prince coming to sweep them off their feet. Go and check the female authors of all them mills and boon and 'historical romance' books - how many of them are happily married?? Why now take on their flights of fancy and try to enforce it in reality?

Y'all need a HUGE dose of reality. Your sisters (i mean fellow women) are the ones causing a great deal of these problems, they allow men to get away with these things, so why would they bother to change? The ones that want to be straight up are told they are not good enough due to unrealistic expectations, so what are you left with? The few good men become disgruntled and go the way of the bad boys.

No one is saying don't have reasonable standards/expectations, but never go into a relationship blindfolded.

A man decided he wants to spend time with his family and career at 29 and you blame him?? Would you prefer that he married you and started cheating or failing to live up to his responsibilities?? Women can truly never be satisfied.

PS - a topic titled 'Dis Men Sef' would invariably be interpreted as another male bashing thread.

Busta:

next time . . .don't open your mouth without reading the posts and just conclude that this is about male bashing only.
being judgemental and riding to conclusion will lead u no where. pele . . .I too know!

Its a general topic,
- African mentality
- Men in general
- Women
- relationships and marriages.

lmao

Debo . . , if I start now . . .all this "ITKs" will come now and call it male bashing and Seun will ban me again.

me and you . . .our talk is another day.

No wahala B, we'll handle our biz later ^{*I see you enjoyed Edmonton *}

It is partly because of all these heartaches and break ups that I actually support people not dating till they are ready to get married. Although that is no guarantee of anything, if the relationship starts out with the view of marrying, the perspective is a lot different and a lot more attention is paid to things. Unlike the cases where 'I like him' or 'I like her' or 'I don't want to be alone' or 'i'm Hot' and things like that serve as the motive for a relationship.

@ Sisi

some of those questions you asked are pertinent, but how many people can confidently answer them? Do I know what I will like or not like in 30 years? Of course you should be reasonably confident you'll want to be with this person forever, as well as adapting to whatever changes happen along the way. The truth is that some element of 'romance' or whatever name it can be called will make things smoother.