I was looking for advice, I guess I didn't get it

Marry a Caucasian.
They are 2 for $5 in the UK.
Leave Nigerian men alone.

@poster
rotflmao!!

I feel ya jare!

No be only you


What can you do?
Find a UK born/bred naija men!
Maybe they won't have same culture/mentality as a reg. naija man.

Naveyah:

If I was to find a really attractive Nigerian guy, I wouldn't want to date him and the thing is that I don't understand why. I don't know if it has anything to do with me being born here in the UK but I just don't want to be attached to them. After a week of talking, I get bored and start ignoring their calls, also I've always said that I would not marry a Nigerian guy, and back when I was younger my mother and her friend prayed for God to make us marry Nigerian men and from what I remember I got very upset and rejected it and all sorts of things. I would really love to get over this, but what exactly can I do? Also this goes for all African men too.

here you said you won't marry them and now you're asking why besides, what's the biggy about a Nigerian man anyways, marry anyone your heart desires abeg marry an Alien from space as far as you're happy being married with them who cares

hannibal lol wth?
ruby_pearl, I seriously thought I was the only one lol

@post
Me i do love Naija men. I mean since i was young my mom and my aunts Prayed to God we will marry an Igbo man. I don't really have a problem with Nigerian men it is just that stupid ego and pride that just turns me off. Most of the time, it is really hard to get past that attitude and see the good in them.

I personally think that that is a very weird question. People are different, everyone unique, and discounting a whole country of men ( about 50% of 140million people) based on the fact that they are Nigerian is crazy.  Aside from that, you can stop forcing yourslef to like 'Nigerian' men and try dating other races, or is someone making you date them?

dreeldee it's just that I don't want to feel like that, as if Nigerian men have some type of disease. I want to be able to date them with no problems.

@poster okay we've heard now you can go.

segzi, I'm not being rude of any sort, it's not as if I want to be like this.

So Naveyah, give me a list of all the things you like in Nigerian men, and your dislikes.

I personally think that that is a very weird question. People are different, everyone unique, and discounting a whole country of men ( about 50% of 140million people) based on the fact that they are Nigerian is crazy. Aside from that, you can stop forcing yourslef to like 'Nigerian' men and try dating other races, or is someone making you date them?

Naveyah:

dreeldee it's just that I don't want to feel like that, as if Nigerian men have some type of disease. I want to be able to date them with no problems.

Some do, it's called disease of the mind

onyinye2:

@post
Me i do love Naija men. I mean since i was young my mom and my aunts Prayed to God we will marry an Igbo man. I don't really have a problem with Nigerian men it is just that stupid ego and pride that just turns me off. Most of the time, it is really hard to get past that attitude and see the good in them.

Why don't you forget about this Igbo issue and focus on getting the best man you can get?  If you are bothered by his arrogance, and you marry him, you're going to be struggling with that arrogance for the rest of your life.  Why not marry a man whose lifestyle doesn't bother you, even if he's white? It's just really petty and silly to sacrifice your happiness to please your unhappy Igbo aunties in order to become as unhappy as they are.

If you can't date Nigerian men, it's because something about them bothers you. And it's very fine.

Naveyah:

dreeldee it's just that I don't want to feel like that, as if Nigerian men have some type of disease. I want to be able to date them with no problems.

you seem to have stigmatized the Nigerian men in your mind so nothing will help you except yourself after all, we have testimonies even on NlL of successful marriages to Nigerian men on NL among the sexist and fighters for equity

like:
(I'm not really sure, well the ones that I have been with are very nice)

dislike:
they can be clingy at times

@ poster and ruby

e concern una oh!

if una like, make una go marry oyinbo, na ya business

@poster that's why i said we've heard and yoU can go. no hard feelings. it's not by force to get married to a nigerian. abi did i write anything bad?

Its like people saying Nigerians are frauds, whats this

Naveyah:

like:
(I'm not really sure, well the ones that I have been with are very nice)

dislike:
they can be clingy at times

Well clingy. . .  yes and no. Some can be too clingy, while others just don't give a damn. But you have to learn how to mold these men. Anyways, for me i just HATE the ego and pride thing. That is what just makes me question if i can find myself married for the rest of my life to this.

workingirl, I'm nigerian too so I'm not trying to say anything about the country as a whole. I know that I would have been different if I was born and raised in Nigeria, but I guess it is other people's opinions in the UK that have rubbed off against me. Like when you're younger people used to make fun of the freshies, and I guess they've influenced me but I'm willing to just let this go, because this is not how I am.

I have never met a nigerian guy that has pride or ego in himself over here, they're lovely guys. I just that I could appreciate them, and this is what I'm going to do. I mean I wouldn't like it if any girl was to that to my brother.

Naveyah:

hannibal lol wth?

LOL??

Let it be known that Nigerian men are the shiznit.
Women from other African countries and all over the world will testify to this.
If Nigerian men turn u off. . . . Try other races and compare.
Lets just hope u won't come back here to say Indian Men are smelly or Chinese men have small members.

Naveyah:

workingirl, I'm nigerian too so I'm not trying to say anything about the country as a whole. I know that I would have been different if I was born and raised in Nigeria, but I guess it is other people's opinions in the UK that have rubbed off against me. Like when you're younger people used to make fun of the freshies,  and I guess they've influenced me but I'm willing to just let this go, because this is not how I am.

Naw girl. Don't use your up bringings and backgrounds as an excuse. I lived in the US my whole entire life. But i still like Nigerian guys.

Naveyah:

I have never met a nigerian guy that has pride or ego in himself over here, they're lovely guys. I just that I could appreciate them, and this is what I'm going to do. I mean I wouldn't like it if any girl was to that to my brother.

Yeah they is lovely guys. Most of them are but those other brothas just give the rest a bad name. Have you dated outside your race and culture before?

Naveyah:

workingirl, I'm nigerian too so I'm not trying to say anything about the country as a whole. I know that I would have been different if I was born and raised in Nigeria, but I guess it is other people's opinions in the UK that have rubbed off against me. Like when you're younger people used to make fun of the freshies, and I guess they've influenced me but I'm willing to just let this go, because this is not how I am.

I'm just saying, you can't group so many people in one box. There are different kinds of Nigerian men and different kinds of men period. You may not like the ones you meet, doesn't mean there aren't any others. To say Nigerian men are this or Nigerian men are that is completely wrong because its generalising and ignorant (I'm not being rude, just speaking the truth). Now I am very serious about you trying to date people you like, Nigerian or not, just make sure the person has the qualities you are looking for, you can find that person across all races and nationalities.

only Nigerians and Jamaicans, and the Jamaicans, well uhmm never again

gabe_logan:

@ poster and ruby

e concern una oh!

if una like, make una go marry oyinbo, na ya business

ahah,

which one is ya own?
fimi sile o!!

Did I say I did not want a naija man?

I say she's not the only one, is that a false statement?

By the way you men on nl behaves sef is enough to make any woman on her right mind think that you guys are bushmen! haba!

BtW, are you watching the Olympics?

Naveyah:

only Nigerians and Jamaicans, and the Jamaicans,  well uhmm never again  

I wouldn't stress to much about this. Im not saying this is a phase you are going through, but just be more open minded. Like not all Nigerian men are good nor are they all bad. Just give one fella to show you this the chance.

If you're lucky, you'll find that Nigerian guy who is one in a million.

I don't like generalizing, but a lot of Delta guys have really impressed me in the marriage/relationship department. They are the bomb, for real. Of course there will always be some bad eggs in any group, but they take care of their wives. I think it must be a culture with them or something.

In any case, just go with your heart. Nigerian or non-Nigerian.

@Poster
Well I guess that is just your preference, everybody is different and it isn't by force that Nigerians must have relationships with Nigerians  

Go for whomever, as long as you are happy

but workingirl, I'm not saying that Nigerian men are this and that, no, all I'm saying is that I find it hard to have a relationship with them because they were born and and raised and Nigeria or even Africa for that matter, I also mentioned African men too. In the UK, when you're in pimary/secondart school kids would go and chat absolute rubbish about those that had come straight from African, they would call them freshies, now they may have rubbed of on me and I know that it has rubbed off on a lot of people, but I want to get that out of my system. I want to date them without thinking that they are freshies. Seriously there are lovely and really attractive nigerian men out here.