Dear Girlfriend
I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you for good.

I've been a good man to you for seven years and I have nothing to show for it.
These last two weeks have been hell.

Your boss called to tell me that you had quit your job today and that was the last straw.

Last week, you came home and didn't notice that I had new haircut,
and cooked your favorite meal.

You came home and ate in two minutes, and went straight to sleep after gossiping with your friend on d phone.
You don't tell me you love me anymore, you don't allow me to touch you anymore.

Either you're cheating or you don't love me anymore, whatever the case is, I'm gone.

P.S. If you're trying to find me, don't. Your SISTER and I are moving away to UK together!

Have a great life!

Your EX-boyfriend

poor sammy man

sharap.
na you poor!

hei ya, Chaai!, i've always known dat gal no fit love person, i no blame d Ex Bf sha

THANK YOU
CBASE.

lol

what? I can't believe this. You can't leave me without paying back all the money i spent on u o. . without giving back those clothes I bought for u including the one u are wearing now plus the money i gave u to feed ya family self 
If u want it this way, then its payday!

SEE YOUR MOUTH,
I SAID IT, SO THIS HAS ALWAYS BEEN ABOUT MONEY.

WELL I WILL SPEND IT ON YOUR SISTER WHO IS ELOPING WITH ME TO THE UK.

oh yeah? spending it on my sister as if u have it. How can u eat ur cake and still have it? U want to deceive my sister abi? hmm, what kind of charm are u using on us? how can we fall for ur broke behind

relax, i have a sugar coated mouth,
you and your sister are not the first.

you are like the 2000th

meanwhile, who wouldnt follow a fine boy like me,

oga milla, you fine no be lie, i see ya pikture wey gabrywyll post, infact, i dash you my grand-ma! she go join you for UK

newdeal:

oga milla, you fine no be lie, i see ya pikture wey gabrywyll post, infact, i dash you my grand-ma! she go join you for UK

lol!

enemies detected !!!!

back to sender

** comes in see something in flight, dodges it n leaves**

lysaa pls do u have another sister

dat one is meant for me and me alone.

take that ur pint sized bla bla bla away

MY REPLY!!!

Dear Ex-BF


Nothing has made my day more than receiving your
letter. It's true you & I have been dating for 7 years,
although a good man is  a far cry from what you've been.
I watch my soaps so much  because they drown out your constant whining & griping.  Too bad that doesn't work.
I DID notice when  you got a hair cut last week,
but the 1st thing that came to mind was 'You look just like a girl!'
Since my mother raised me not to say anything if you can't say  something nice, I didn't comment. And when you cooked my  
favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY SISTER
because I stopped eating pork 7 years ago!
About you touching me: I turned away from
you because u were wearing "SILK BOXERS" (u know silk irritates my skin) with a N500 price tag still on them,
& I prayed it was a coincidence that my sister had
just borrowed N500 from me that morning.


After all of this, I still loved you & felt we could work it out.
So when I hit the lotto for 10 million dollars, I quit my
job & bought us 2 tickets to Jamaica , but when I  got
home you were gone.
Everything happens for a reason, I guess.


I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted.
The letter you wrote ensures
you won't get a dime from me.
So take care.


Signed, Your Ex-GF Rich As Hell & Free!
P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this,
but my sister Carla was  born
Carl. I hope that's not a problem

lysaa:

what? I can't believe this. You can't leave me without paying back all the money i spent on u o. . without giving back those clothes I bought for u including the one u are wearing now plus the money i gave u to feed ya family self
If u want it this way, then its payday!

Lyssa- i helped deliver the letter as u told me to, after you travelled, Av fun !!!

thank u dear

i ddn't include this part in there. .

dear Ex
U said I was gossipping with my friend, but she was actually looking for a place where we can be alone. .away from town. . just the two of us. .for at least a week. We concluded it would be, Bahamas, that got us excited. BUT U CAME IN, MET US LAUGHING AND FELT WE WERE IN A GOSSIP. So much for playing the fool. .if u leave, never come back. I'm sick of ur sugarcoated- lying- brokeass. Take care!

POOR SAMMI

mykali darling, can u take me shopping?

e go soon begin dey mumu, because dem call am darling, Oya make we dey look

Sup dude?

lunch, my guy

Cbase cease noise dia! e konsain u?  just mechi onue

Na wah o!why u dey cover d guy?cbase dey play d guy package,abi na bad thing?

ask am abeg,

2 against one, shame on u guys. .

as for u cbase, meet me at the backyard

Wetin dey hapen 4 backyrd?