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Which Kyn Lyf? (IN PIDGIN) - Literature - Nairaland

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Which Kyn Lyf? (IN PIDGIN) by maputohq(m): 5:32pm On Jul 10, 2014
Well I will use the language I understand best to express myself.
The story is on a young boy ‘jaja’ on a journey which is suppose to make or mar his future. He takes us back to his real life telling us who he is and the difficulties he faces to create a niche for himself in future.

This story is dedicated to every poor Nigerian out there struggling to make ends meet and students also who are not privileged to enjoy the luxuries of this life.
Re: Which Kyn Lyf? (IN PIDGIN) by maputohq(m): 5:39pm On Jul 10, 2014
“All passengers going to lokoja should get to the terminal now, the bus is ready”.My papa carry my bag dey waka go the terminal, na so me follow. Say i dey leave my people dem for lagos dey go lokoja make me wan cry but i be big boy, so i bone. As dem check my bag finish, na so i carry am from my papa as dem no gree am enter the bus terminal. Sadness enter my body well as per se e go tey before we see again. I no sabi look back do my papa byebye sef. I just take sofri enter the bus waka go where dem gimme to siddon. “Who is jaja”? Na so i turn my head dey fyn person wey call me. “Na me”. Na so i answer. “Person dey fyn u outside”. Na so i comot for bus see my papa wey wan gimme money but the thing wey make me laff be say anoda girl for the bus dey ansa jaja. I jump for bus again waka go siddon before bus begin move. My papa just stand dey look as we dey comot. I no sabi how i go carry cry that dey. Na one fine lady dey siddon near me. Me just greet am comot face begin dey tink my life. E no even consign me if she ansa sef. Wetin dey my mind no let me see fine or worwor girl sef. I no just dey ok. Na 7:00 sharp our bus take begin journey. As we no chop for house na, na so them give us rice and chicken. Me wey dey vex before kon kule turn my face look this fine Aunty wey siddon near me as she dey chop, me too open my own begin chop as i wan form ajebo before.
No be say me sef b ajebo as my papa sef no get money but im just want the best for im pikin them. My mama dey always tell me say i neva enter two sef before i begin go skul. Na one akwa-ibom mama been dey carry me go skul come house. Na so e reach d tym wey my papa no get money send me go skul again. Na so me and my small bros go dey play for house na (im na 2 while me na 4 dat tym). The tym wey small money enter my papa hand, im put me inside one private skul wey dem dey call JABULANI INTERNATIONAL SCHOOL. Bad belle people begin dey vex say why my papa wey no get money carry im pikin go private school if no b crase dey worry am, but im no send. The thing hard am wella as dem too dey pursue me comot for school say me neva pay skul fees. I go cry come house but na to stay for house reach tym wey papa go get money pay small. He bad sotey landlord pursue us comot for house wey e neva tey wey my mama born anoda pikin.we don reach seven wey dey live inside one room. My papa, mama, two aunty, my bros and me with the small pikin wey dem just born. Na d house wey landlord sef dey pursue us be that.
Re: Which Kyn Lyf? (IN PIDGIN) by maputohq(m): 6:27pm On Jul 10, 2014
Everybody wey dey dat house park their kaya comot for there remain only we, as money no gree come. Wetin us small pikin carry put for mind b say all our pikin padi don comot for compound remain we. No pikin wey we go follow play. E no tey sha, wey we pack comot sef, but wetin man fit do. As we still small na, no yawa. Wetin we sabi b say b say house dey , and say we con meet small pikin dem make we jolli small. Wetin pikin sabi pass play?
E tey before dem tell us to pak comot for house again. I don enta 14 da tym sef why my broda chike don enta 12 years. My broda chidi wey follow am for back just dey enta 9. E bad pass my mama born twins follow body. We full house like say we wan form football team with correct bench. Na so we pack everytin wey we get port go anoda far area. Na so money wahala follow catch us again.
Me finish primary school now kon reach tym wey pikin go enter secondary school. Na one kine ajebo school wey dem be dey call Johny comprehensive college na im my papa carry me go put. The school fees kon dey like money wey person wan collect for babalawo hand. My papa n mama money combine sef no go sabi pay the school money sef but wetin me been wonder b say why im go put me for ajebo school. Chike sef tell my papa say na ajebo school im sef go enter na. My mama carry eye look am talk say “shey e get where u dey dig money abi”. Chike see say mama no dey smile, im just carry matter keep for mathias no follow person talk am again.
Na so me take sabi how dem dey carry form ajebo. Fine ajebo girls full school like water but me just dey think wetin my mama talk say woman dey kill o. Me i neva ready to die o. Na so me no look woman sef for eye. E reach tym wey i sabi say woman no dey kill sef, but if u too like dem, your career fit spoil. All na the same. If woman spoil your career or woman kill you, na die person go still die. Me just take am say woman bad.
Teachers no kon like me sef say me get stronghead. Na so i do sotey i write my SSCE comot for the school. Me don tell my sef say e bad reach, i no go see any of my teachers as i been dey vex for dem. I even dey tell dem say i no go greet them if we jam for road. Na laugh dem go dey laugh me say i b mumu. Na later i kon sabi sey i b real mumu.
Re: Which Kyn Lyf? (IN PIDGIN) by Kweenliz007(f): 7:10pm On Jul 10, 2014
patiently waiting ooooo
Re: Which Kyn Lyf? (IN PIDGIN) by maputohq(m): 9:14pm On Jul 10, 2014
As secondary school don become history for me with my eyes for university, i begin hustle make i for fit see money take hold body even as SSCE result neva show. I hustle sotey man begin taya for hustle. Result later show na but the kine fear wey hol me no gree me tell anybody say result don show. I know say if i fail, na to go dey sell okrika for Alaba because my papa no go gree gimme money to go write anoda exam. The UME wey i go write some weeks before been dey fear me too as man no put body for ground read well. Wetin been dey my mind be say if i pass my SSCE kon pass UME join, i don become undergraduate be that o. I begin pray like mad man say make baba God help make my result fyn. I still no gree to tell my papa sef say result don show. The day we im know how far, im call me “jaja”.
“papa”. I answer am. “u dey call me”?
The way papa take call me dat day fear me no b small. Wetin been dey fly for my mind be say abi im don see my result. Papa no smile at all. Na da one kon fear me pass. Na so im kon talk.
“i hear say una result don show since last two weeks, why u neva go check your own?” Na so im ask.
“me neva hear o, na now i just dey hear am”na so i blow lie give papa.
“hmm, make you go check am tommorrow”
“no yawa papa”
I stand dey look am as im waka go one shirt wey im dey put money comot 500 naira.
“Take, use am go check your result tomorrow”
I just stand collect the money begin dey look am like slowpoke. To say thank you sef begin hard me. E just be lyk im gimme the money to go suffer. Im just waka comot for my front, like say im no mind. Wetin dey hook am for body pass to dey fyn thank you.
I carry body waka go cyber cafe to go see which kyn scores dem gimme. As i enter the cyber cafe, i see plenty person wey result carry them come too. Dem plenty inside the cyber café like say dem be sand. E kon be like say na everybody wey come check result fail as dem carry face keep like shit wey person march. Na so i begin hear noise. “ope o! ope oo!!!!”. Na so i turn face see one guy wey dey jump around like say im get cricket for inside yansh. Vex begin catch people wey full there, as dem come pursue the guy comot for the cyber cafe. I take jeje waka go meet the guy “abeg, make i see your result". The guy carry the result gimme. Na only five credit, the guy sef get and two pass. Im carry F9 for yoruba and french. The better thing b say im don pass the subject wey im need English and maths join. Wetin im even need french and yoruba for sef. I no care to congratulate am sef, my own fear be say if i fail, i no go return to that house and i no go bother to check my jamb again. Na so i carry body enter the cyber cafe again.
“bros, you wan check result too" d cyber cafe guy ask me. Me just dey vibrate kon answer “hmm...result... okay...yes i ...wan check". Na so the bros hala me “which one kon be ya own sef , you wan check abi you no wan check?"
“i wan check"
“oya wetin be ya numba"?
As i sabi say my voice go finish me there, i just write the number for paper give am. The guy collect am come look me one kine. “better no die for here. If u wan die, enta ya papa house first". To vex sef no b the issue, i must check dat result unless, my papa go chop me. As the guy begin check the result, na im nepa people begin work. Light don go.
Re: Which Kyn Lyf? (IN PIDGIN) by maputohq(m): 11:26pm On Jul 10, 2014
Kweenliz007: patiently waiting ooooo
Alright ooo...I ll get to add them soon
Re: Which Kyn Lyf? (IN PIDGIN) by maputohq(m): 9:18am On Jul 11, 2014
“chai, my UPS sef get wahala, dis thing go begin dey boot again”. The guy kon look me tok say “dis boy na bad luck, na as im come light waka comot”.
If no b say na result i wan check, i for jab the guy for mouth abi im no know im mate? No b say i senior the guy sha, e just b say i dey big pass my age. I just dey enter 16 but person wey see me go dey think say i b 22. So if dat guy fit follow me yarn pawuff, e be lyk say im no go get respect sef. As i been dey look am, na 18 im go be.
Dem try start Gen but the thing no gree. Wetin been dey my mind be say na how i go take check dat result if light no gree come, as e b say dat na the only cyber cafe wey dey we area. E no tey sha before my guyz(nepa) return light. Na d speed wey light dey carry i take rush go front of computer. The mumu guy just dey look me one kine, but i been no send. In short, make im go die. I go catch am deal with am later but make i see my result first.
I stand near the guy as im dey check the result for me. I just dey vibrate like say i carry electric current for body.
“Na only u wan check result, wey u wan die for here”, na so the guy take hala me.
“Chibuzor, take am easy. Na tension the guy dey on ooo” Na so one man for there take defend me. As i sabi sey the mumu name na chibuzor, na im kon vex me pass. Chibuzor na the name of my biggest rival for school. We dey always fight for everything, whether na for who go carry first o, who fine pass, who girls like pass. The only thing wey i no dey follow chibuzor fight for na who get money pass. The difference dey clear for dat one, im get money pass me. Wetin make me hate the gut be say im win me for election for batch president for school. Before nko, na im money dey talk. Hmmm. Another chibuzor wan join dusturb me. I begin dey wonder if people wey dey ansa chibuzor no just like me.
“guy, come see your result oo, e be lyk say you b masquerade o”. Chibuzor no dey vex again. Na smile dey im face as im dey talk am.
“wetin you mean” i ask chibuzor.
“na A1 parallel i dey see here o but you get F9 for yoruba”. E just be like say person pour me cold water as im talk am.
“wetin b my own with yoruba, or i resemble yoruba boy? Abeg print am out jare”. I carry the 500 naira wey my papa give me give chibuzor, but im wan kon scope me because i pass well.
“Oga, drop something for the boy na”. I look am with one bad eye collect my change from im hand waka comot. Wetin be my own with am, Shey im don curse me finish?
Re: Which Kyn Lyf? (IN PIDGIN) by Nobody: 9:54am On Jul 11, 2014
Will be great if you spaced the paragraph.... looks bulky....please do that. Thanks
Re: Which Kyn Lyf? (IN PIDGIN) by maputohq(m): 10:29am On Jul 11, 2014
Timzy234: Will be great if you spaced the paragraph.... looks bulky....please do that. Thanks
alright...I ll do just that.
Re: Which Kyn Lyf? (IN PIDGIN) by segun544(m): 10:30am On Jul 11, 2014
Bros, u dey try, no be small............I hail ooo
Re: Which Kyn Lyf? (IN PIDGIN) by PrinceAdepoju(m): 12:44pm On Jul 11, 2014
I don dey follow una story oo,
na good story you get for here..
Re: Which Kyn Lyf? (IN PIDGIN) by maputohq(m): 5:40pm On Jul 11, 2014
segun544: Bros, u dey try, no be small............I hail ooo
tnx bro
Re: Which Kyn Lyf? (IN PIDGIN) by maputohq(m): 5:46pm On Jul 11, 2014
I carry body waka comot for chibuzor shop, dey go house. Na so so thinking i been dey think. How e be say i fit make eight As when e be say i no carry beta body go write the exam. My papa go happy well well and my mama go cook correct soup. Dat one no too sweet me as i also been dey think of plenty other things.

The other chibuzor, wetin im sef go get? Im go get reach eight A's? Im go get A for everything? Im go fail? Wetin b my own sef? Weda im fail or im pass, dat one no be my headache, but why i been dey bother? Maybe i want make im fail. My real headache b say UME neva gree show me my result. Anytym wey i go check am, na to dey see ‘pending’. I no sure if i go fit pass dat one. Okay if i fit pass, i no go fit reach 250 wey UNN set as cut off mark for person wey wan read law. Why me sef go put law? Wetin make i no put mass comm or theatre art? Maybe i no just like them.

Na for where i go see money take enter school? Me wey dem dey pursue everyday comot for school say i neva pay school fees, pay hostel money, and man must wack. The result wey i check no even sweet my body at all; wetin man wan take result do if e no fit see money continue school? Okay, na to dey teach small small pikin dem for nursery school. “tufiakwa” i shout.

“jesuuuuu o”. i stop to dey waka because of the noise, na im i see as pipu plenty dey look me.
“dis boy, u dey crase? God punish you. If u wan die, no b me go kill u. Alakoba”. I no sabi wetin to tok. I just see say i don think too much enter inside road no know the tym wey d man for jam me. I look back see im moto for back. So i for don die? I stand just dey look the man.

Everybody wey gather come tok for the matter carry wahala go remain me and the man there. I no know if na to tell am thank you, weldone or sorry. word no gree comot for my mouth. The man begin look me wan kyn. Maybe im dey wonder why i no talk anything to anybody. E look my hand see me dey hold paper.
“make i see da paper wey u carry”. I give am my result. As im look am finish, e smile nod im head.
“na ya result be dis”? I just nod my head. My mouth no just wan gree to open.
“hmm, so nice” e giv me my result, look me wan kyn. E be lyk say im no dey vex again. Maybe im e wan ask wetin dey worry me as my face dull, but e be lyk say im b dey hurry. E enter im moto drive comot. I begin continue my journey but na after i don do small fake smile make pipu no begin dey look me again.
Re: Which Kyn Lyf? (IN PIDGIN) by maputohq(m): 5:53pm On Jul 11, 2014
Person wey escape death no go waka go meet death again. If say dat man moto for jam me, e for bad pass pass wetin i dey think. Shey oyibo talk say where there is a will, there is a way. Person no dey get will inside grave. E beta make i for hustle enta school than make i die with all my effort inside graveyard.

I no just try think again. Make i no forget myself again enter inside tipper head. Shey na moto i just escape. I try to sing some song for inside my head make i for fit focus till i reach house. The road sef wey i dey follow kon begin dey long for me; i no just get mysef . Plenty person for road dey jist theirself dey laff, e be lyk say na only me no happy dat day. I just keep face like person wey give woman belle wey the papa come pursue comot for house.

Na how i go enter school dey wahala me. My JAMB sef neva gree show, i wan kill mysef wit worry of how i go take enta school. E be lyk say the jamb sef add to my wahala. No b person wey get only five credit been dey jubilate for chibuzor shop? Me i get eight distinction and i still dey keep face like evil spirit.

The song wey i dey try sing for head no fit stay sef. Na chibuzor shop my mind dey. The way im be dey look me as my result show sef, e be lyk say im be dey expect make i jump, shout and scatter im shop lyk how the other guy been do. The way i keep face, im go dey think say i carry winch for body. I know say as i comot for there, dem go don carry me form topic for dem shop dat day.

E tey small before i enta house. My papa been dey backyard dey hear news from one small battery radio wey im buy, since NEPA dem no wan follow us smile na, na battery radio man dey use jolli. Where man get money to but generator?

I just wan sleep and forget all the wahala wey dey front. Afterall, na papa fault say i dey give mysef wahala. Im don gimme too much pressure already. I waka go meet am to show am the result
“papa, good evening”
“evening, ahnahn, jaja na u”. E be lyk say my papa too dey do im own thinking sef.
“you don come”? Im ask.
“yes papa” i answer. “i don go check the result ”. I give am the result. Im first look me well well before im open the result. Im know say no be fear dey do me. Wetin im be dey think be say i no well. After im don look the result, im smile kon look me.

“well done. Congratulation”.
“thank you papa”
“hmmm” my papa clear im throath. I been think say im wan yarn something. Nothing. Im carry my result give me, shake im head, carry im radio enter inside house. As my mama no dey house, me sef enta inside to go sleep. Wetin i plan be say na till the next morning. To dey stay awake go mean say i dey know kill mysef. I carry mat put for ground. I neva even close my eyes before sleep carry me.
Re: Which Kyn Lyf? (IN PIDGIN) by maputohq(m): 2:54pm On Jul 14, 2014
I wake up for night with pain for all my body. E be lyk say all the wahala wey I been put mysef for d the other day don carry sickness put for my body. I no fit sleep as my body just dey do me lyk say person carry stick knack me for body. I been dey feel drum for my head. I try stand up, enta room to go carry water drink, as me and my bros dem dey sleep for parlour. My mama and the twins them dey sleep inside the room.

“Jaja, wetin dey happen?” na my mama voice for the dark room. I no need to on light as I been know where the water dey. I no surprise to hear her voice. E be lyk say she no dey too sleep, plenty tym when I enter dat room for night, she no dey sleep. E be lyk say too much thinking no dey let am sleep for night. Before 4 reach for morning, she don begin pray im own prayer before she go wake us later to pray family prayer. My papa no dey sleep for house because of im night work wey im dey do. Even if im dey house, na my mama go still lead prayer. Doctors don tell her make she dey sleep well as dem even give am medicine wey go make am sleep well. E be lyk say dat one been no work.

I just stand for inside the dark room look the bed way my mama dey sleep, na one old bed wey the foam don thin. The foam and fifteen inches ruler go get the same fatness. E beta to sleep for ground dan to sleep for dat foam, as the foam strong lyk stone.

My mama carry body siddon for bed look my side “on the light.” she talk with tiredness. I use hand fyn the controller for the darkness. I on the light after my hand touch the controller.
She look me, tight face, “wetin dey worry u ”she ask.
“Mama, all my body dey pain me. I no well.” I ansa am.
“you well in Jesus name.”
“amen” I ansa her prayer. If I no ansa amen, e go b lyk say I b unbeliever, but I begin wonder wetin dat prayer go do for my body.

My mama put hand for window carry paracetamol give me. “after you don take dat medicine, go pray make God hep you.”
“hmmm.” I shake my head as I collect am from her hand.
I enta inside parlour knee down for one chair make i begin pray. E no tey wey sleep carry me go. I wake up later begin hear my mama do her prayer for inside room. She begin “cast, bind and loose.” she been dey talk say make baba God faya all the winch wey wan chop her pikin wey just pass im exam. Papa go don show am my result before im go work, because I no meet am for house when I check my result.

The sickness hold me for body reach one week. To go anywhere turn wahala. I sleep for inside church one Sunday, sotey my mama tell me to comet for church go house. E bad reach, my mama go borrow money carry me go hospital. Na after three days for there dem let me go house.
Re: Which Kyn Lyf? (IN PIDGIN) by maputohq(m): 5:38pm On Jul 14, 2014
I try check my UME again to see if dem don show my result. Na chibuzor shop I still go check am. Chibuzor no been dey shop dat day. Na the man wey try defend me the oda day been dey. I check am see say na 201 jamb gimme. God go punish their papa. I collect the one wey im print wan begin go house.
“Oga, you Neva pay na” the man call me back.
“hmmm...sorry.” I put hand for pocket comot 300 give am. I begin waka go again.
“come collect change na.” the man call me bak again. Im look me lyk say wetin dey do u, but I just give am fake smile, collect my 50 naira change begin go house.
201 no go fit gimme law. Maybe God no want make I read law. I change my mind say I go do the course wey I put for second choice; English and literary studies. Shey I hear say LASU been dey collect 200 sef.

LASU later gimme admission to read English. The thing follow for last list wey comot because I been pick am as second choice. The thing sweet me no be small. I hear say I go need to collect my result for the school wey I comot from, the one wey dem dey call statement of result.

The day way I go collect am, the stronghead wey I been dey do for school cause me wahala. As I enta sch, all the teachers just look me lyk say dem no know me. I no send, as I no even greet dem sef. I no know say one of dem don turn principal. Na one Mr Joseph. We been dey call am ‘Apari Joe’ because im get bald head and the head come big lyk bull dog own. I no dey greet Joe when I been dey dat school. Im be the numba one teacher wey I hate pass, and im sef hate me. E dey always fyn any chance to wipe me with im pankere. I report am to our principal dat tym. The thing vex Joe sotey im frustrate my life for dat school well well. If dem dey pursue pipu for school fees, as far as na Joe, I must go house because e no go free me enta school dat day.

I waka straight go the principal office. ‘Mr Joseph Edafe’ just dey boldly written for front of the office door. I begin wonder if dem don carry the principal office. I look up for the lintel see ‘PRINCIPAL'S OFFICE’. My heart jump hundred times. Which Joseph Edafe? Joe don turn principal? I begin pray for my head. I know say if I no get dat result for the next two weeks, LASU admission don end be dat, since dem dey end their screening for that tym. I dey owe the school 35 thousands and dat one no be school fees sef. Na money wey I no gree pay for extra lesson wey the school organize for SSCE period, and money for graduation. Why I go pay for something wey I no attend. I know say Joe must ask for dat one. My prayer be say make im for no see am.
Re: Which Kyn Lyf? (IN PIDGIN) by maputohq(m): 3:01pm On Jul 15, 2014
I knock hand three tyms for Joe office door. My mind begin jump lyk say I see lion.
“Please come in.” Joe talk from inside. The sound of im voice wan fall me down. I breath well well before I enta.
“good day sir.” I greet Joe.
“yea, how can I help you.” Joe no carry face up look me. Im been dey too bizy before I enter. E be lyk say Joe Neva know say na me dey talk.
“sir, I'll like to get my SSCE result.” I answer Joe. The mention of SSCE make Joe carry im head up. Im bone face as im look see say na me.
“Jaja, so u came back?” im begin dey laff some kyn wicked laff. Fear begin dey catch me well well. Joe been dey enjoy the show, im neva see me fear before. I no know wetin to ansar am.
“So what do you need the result for.” Joe ask.
“sir, I've just been admitted to study English at LASU” I ansar am. Joe look me kon dey shake head. Maybe im no believe say na English I wan study with all my gra gra for school.

Joe open im drawer bring out one file. For the back of the file, na debtors wey dem write with big letters. Hmm, Joe wan check this thing. Wahala dey.
“Jaja Ugochukwu, right?” im ask
“Yes sir”
“2010 graduating set?”
“yes sir”
Joe no need to ask my name, I be im regular customer before, so my name dey like im school duty.
“well young man, you have an outstanding debt of thirty five thousand naira. You will have to come back for your result after settling those bills.” Joe return the file to im drawer after im yarn finish.
I open mouth look am. ”but...but.. ” I turn stammerer.
“but what?” Joe counter me, and im eye come red.
“i'm not owing. I paid all my fees before leaving the school.” water just full my eye, I begin sweat. Joe just look me, clear im throat.
“hmm hmm. Well, twenty five thousand naira for SSCE classes, ten thousand for the valedictory service. ” Joe begin look me with wickedness for im eye
“But sir, I was neither at the valedictory service nor did I participated in the SSCE lesson.”
“well, the rule is that you'll have to pay for them, whether or not you attended any of them” Joe continue wetin im be dey do before I enter. The way im be dey act show me say Joe no ready to a near me. E just be lyk say im dey tell me to get the phuck out of his office and don't return until you have the money.

I carry body comot for Joe office.E no consyn am if I die.Even as I been dey fear, I been dey think of how I do slap Joe for im apari. Im dey vex me too much. As me sef humble for there begin surprise me. Me wey reduce Joe power for school after I report am to the principal. Joe don get im power back because Im don turn ordinary principal. Make God help me punish Joe. If na anything, make Joe lyf no sweet. Where man go see thirty five thousand naira for the next twelve days. Na then screening dey end. This devil of a Joe don finish me. As I dey comot for the school gate, person tap me for back. I turn see another enemy. God, why chibuzor go show today? Which kyn bad luck I enta?
“mtcheew" I hiss, push am comot for road begin waka go house. I begin dey think of how I go take fyn thirty five thousand naira. All tanx to Joe
Re: Which Kyn Lyf? (IN PIDGIN) by temmythe(f): 7:32pm On Jul 16, 2014
Update, pls? sad
Re: Which Kyn Lyf? (IN PIDGIN) by maputohq(m): 8:12pm On Jul 16, 2014
temmythe: Update, pls? sad
tnx for following. I'll try doing that tomorrow. The light here is not stable. Trying anything might get me blind.
Re: Which Kyn Lyf? (IN PIDGIN) by temmythe(f): 10:55pm On Jul 16, 2014
tnx for following. I'll try doing that tomorrow. The light here is not stable. Trying anything might get me blind.

Fingers crossed
Re: Which Kyn Lyf? (IN PIDGIN) by DONMAYOR19(m): 3:06pm On Jul 17, 2014
Following....bro update nah
Re: Which Kyn Lyf? (IN PIDGIN) by maputohq(m): 3:34pm On Jul 17, 2014
DONMAYOR19: Following....bro update nah
Bro no b my fault ooo...everything just dey against me now. I should have done that this morning but my phone went insane.
Re: Which Kyn Lyf? (IN PIDGIN) by maputohq(m): 4:32pm On Jul 17, 2014
The gist wey I been dey hear be say na chibuzor carry the prize for the ‘most outstanding student’ for our set. Dem tok say im carry A1 for all the ten subjects wey im been register. The guy go don dey claim bad guy for everywhere. E beta say I no follow am tok dat day; im for don yab me well well. Im don beat me for anoda thing. E even beta say I no attend dat graduation; I for die of shame dat day if I for see dem carry most outstanding give chibuzor.

I don give up already for the thirty- five thousand wey Joe tell me to bring. I know say e no dey possible. Even if na blood money person wan do, the money no go fit ripe before twelve days. I just do small hustle, kon begin wait for miracle.

Two days remain for LASU screening to end, money Neva enter house. My papa come back house from work early. Im dey happy small. E be lyk say papa don hammer.
“welcome papa.” I greet am.
“jaja, how you dey”
“i dey fyn papa”
My papa first waka enta room go drop the bag wey im carry, drink water before im come parlour.
“Jaja.” papa call me.
“yes papa.” I ansar am.
“Where chike and chidi waka go?”
“dem Neva come back from school.”your mama sef neva come?”
“no.” I shake head as I ansar am. Im no ask about the twins (Amaka and chichi). Na my mama dey bring them back from school; if my mama neva come back, dem sef neva come back be dat too. E be lyk say papa no know say im quick come house, abi na because im no dey know the tym wey dem dey close?

Hunger been dey catch my papa, but food no dey. Mama neva come house to come cook. Im enta room again go carry garri, pour water inside, begin dey drink. Me sef enta room go do my own garri to drink. Man must wack.

“ehn ehn! Jaja, before I forget, your principal call me today.” papa no dey look my side as im dey tok. Na im garri im face lyk say im no go bellefull if im comot eye for im garri. I drop my own garri, come begin look papa.
“wetin im tok papa.” I bone face lyk person wey wan complete one bad mission. My mind no settle.
“im say make you come collect your result tomorrow. ” my papa ansa me. I for ask am if im serious, but I know say im no dey use dat kyn thing play. Wetin do Joe wey im wan gimme my result? Shey im be dey form bad guy for me? Maybe God don help me punish am well well. I carry my garri begin drink. Papa sef dey enjoy im own. Person wey see us go think say the garri carry plenty weight. The house quiet lyk graveyard. Na only my mouth and my papa own I been dey hear.

My papa become the first to talk for wetin been dey lyk ‘silence competition’
“your principal tok say you be stubborn boy.”
I no ansar am. I carry head up look am keep face down again, take the last spoon of my garri. My papa continue im tok.
“I don tell you say stronghead no go take you go anywhere. Make you better change.”
My papa no tok again. Im be the kyn man wey no dey tok too much. If to say na my mama, she for don turn that small issue to sermon. My papa stand up, enta inside room to go sleep. I carry im plate with my own carry go wash.
Why Papa still dey call that apari Joe my principal? Shey im sef no be principal when I been dey the school. I begin pray say make the day wey I go collect the result be the last day me and Joe go see. I must collect everything I need from Joe.

1 Like

Re: Which Kyn Lyf? (IN PIDGIN) by DONMAYOR19(m): 8:50pm On Jul 17, 2014
Nice job
Re: Which Kyn Lyf? (IN PIDGIN) by maputohq(m): 9:19am On Jul 18, 2014
DONMAYOR19: Nice job
tnx bro. I'll keep them coming. my phone is going through some challenges.
Re: Which Kyn Lyf? (IN PIDGIN) by chovwen01(f): 9:51am On Jul 23, 2014
u're doin gr8!!!update plz....
Re: Which Kyn Lyf? (IN PIDGIN) by DONMAYOR19(m): 9:06pm On Jul 23, 2014
tnx bro. I'll keep them coming. my phone is going through some challenges.
where are u bro...hope all is well o?
Re: Which Kyn Lyf? (IN PIDGIN) by maputohq(m): 11:25pm On Jul 23, 2014
chovwen01: u're doin gr8!!!update plz....
tnx . I'm back.
Re: Which Kyn Lyf? (IN PIDGIN) by maputohq(m): 11:26pm On Jul 23, 2014
DONMAYOR19: where are u bro...hope all is well o?
I'm here o. just had a little problem. I'm back.
Re: Which Kyn Lyf? (IN PIDGIN) by maputohq(m): 11:27pm On Jul 23, 2014
I carry body begin go the school make I go see Joe. Joe get mind o. Why im go wan destroy person future? Shey na because of ordinary strong head dey make am do lyk person wey im head no correct? I begin dey wonder plenty things: How my papa take see Joe sef? Abi dem tok for phone? Wetin dem tok wey make Joe change im mind? Maybe Joe don repent.

My mind comot for Joe kon enter Chibuzor. Wetin chibuzor kon fyn for school dat day? Abi im kon dey wait for the day wey I go enter school? The way im take laff the day wey im see me, just dey lyk say im dey tell me “I be your oga.” Thank God say I no been follow am tok; e for bloody dat day. Maybe we for fight, wound oursef. Me and chibuzor been dey lyk Tom and Jerry for school. My friends no fit be im friend. We no just lyk jam for anywhere. Na because of dat dem no dey gree carry us go competition together for school.

I reach the school after I been done waka for over one hour. I been no get money to enter moto. The
money wey I been get na the one wey I plan to take enter moto if I dey go back house.

The first teacher wey I meet as I enta school na one Mr Odiwe Henry. Mr Henry na one of the teachers wey been lyk me when I dey the school.
“Jaja, my boy.” im call me as im been dey call me when I be im student.
“Good day sir.” I greet am with smile for face.
“How are you doing?” im ask as Im put hand round my neck.
“I'm fine sir.”
“You have been enjoying yourself. It is so obvious. Look at your chicks, how big they are. Look at how tall you have grown .”
“I might have to thank my mother for that .” I ansar Mr Henry. Me and im begin laff. I begin yarn Mr Henry how my life don dey after school, how I pass my SSCE well well and how Joe no wan realease my result, because of Thirty-five thousand wey I no suppose owe. Im tell me say make I no mind wetin Joe dey doe me.

“I love the fact that you are being stubborn; you are just been yourself, unlike others who pretend to be who they are not and it returns to haunt them." Na so Mr Henry take yarn. “Do not try to change your personality due to pressure. Be who you were born to be" Mr Henry end im tok.

We tok for over forty minutes before leave Mr Henry. I no comot from im side until I been collect im phone number. As I been no get phone, I write am on top paper.

I happy sotey I kon dey see am as good luck. The last tym wey I been enta school, wey other teachers wey I see bone face, Joe no gree give me result. Maybe im go give me as I see Mr Henry
Re: Which Kyn Lyf? (IN PIDGIN) by DONMAYOR19(m): 11:57pm On Jul 23, 2014
I'm here o. just had a little problem. I'm back.
ok....hope is cool now?
Re: Which Kyn Lyf? (IN PIDGIN) by maputohq(m): 2:34pm On Jul 24, 2014
DONMAYOR19: ok....hope is cool now?
yea... tnx

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