cococandy: Crackhaus.
Oya come and read.
Is he still a women's pastor?

crackhaus:
I have read it.
Did you read it, and do you agree with everything 100%?

cococandy:
I agree with 95 percent.

Not that the remaining 5 percent doesn't make sense,it does but I think he should have elaborated more on them as those points can be given loose meaning by mischievous dudes and might be used by abusers to perpetrate their evils.

But taken alongside the ones for females,and if both parties are true to themselves,yes it does make a whole lot of sense

solazo: If there’s anything a man hates in his life, it’s a nagging wife. Please stop nagging. #MarriedWomen

sure thing. I hate nags too.women pls don't nag. It's not healthy

Your husband is not a ‘project’. He’s not yours to change or fix or mould. Please he is yours to love. #MarriedWomen

agreed.marry who you can live with not who you can't stand but intend to change

A nagging wife is like water going drip-drip-drip on a rainy day. How can you keep her quiet? (Proverbs 27:15 GNB) #MarriedWomen

tick

Stop looking at your husband to be the one to make you happy. That’s actually your job, not his. #MarriedWomen

hmm. Skeptical about this. I know everyone should try as much as possible to be responsible for their own happiness. But it's not wrong to expect your spouse to do things sometimes with your happiness as their point of focus.

A husband’s greatest need in this world of marriage is to be respected by his wife. #MarriedWomen

tick

When you give to your husband without expectations, then God somehow begins to meet your expectations. #MarriedWomen

sounds like sunday sermon. 'Sow a seed of faith and God will make it grow'.praise the lord. sisters

Your husband truly wants you to be happy but he really doesn’t want to be blamed when you’re not happy. #MarriedWomen

then he better step up to it. and yes he'll be blamed if the unhappiness is a direct result of his in/action

Look in the mirror & learn to love what you see. A woman who loves her body takes care of it for her husband. Love your body. #MarriedWomen

tick

The successful mathematics in marriage is to give 100% and expect nothing in return. #MarriedWomen

disagree.partners should discuss and agree on what they expect from each other. Financially and emotionally. If they didn't need each other they wouldn't be getting married in the first place.

Stop expecting your husband to be what he’s not. Unmet expectations will be the greatest source of sorrow in your marriage. #MarriedWomen

agreed. Unrealistic expectations can ruin

You have to make forgiveness a habit. In big things and in little things. Forgive. Forgive. Forgive. #MarriedWomen

agreed 50percent. How many times will one forgive battery and side chicks saga? In the grave or when in the hospital to collect HIV pills? There's a limit to forgiveness

I’m not sure your friends will give you objective advice about your husband. Why make them your counsellors. #MarriedWomen

tick. Bring your issues to this faceless forum than tell it to your friends whom you can't even vouch for their sincerity and love for you.

Try to overcome little annoyances, like when your husband leaves a wet towel on the bed. #MarriedWomen

tick. As long as he's not full blown slob it doesn't really matter

Men are not wired like women and your husband doesn’t even know he is being insensitive to your needs. Tell him nicely #MarriedWomen

ok. tick

Stop saying “I will leave you one day” or “I want a divorce” whenever you quarrel. In the end it will backfire. #MarriedWomen

tick

Stop being so needy, it drains your husband. #MarriedWomen

tick

Never criticize your husband. It builds resentment in him. #MarriedWomen

mature adults should be able to handle healthy criticism. That's not to be confused with mockery. Some women with their sharp tongues don't know the difference between the two. So I get where he's coming from with this

Why don’t you compliment your husband on what he does right rather than tear him down for what he does wrong? #MarriedWomen

tick tick tick tick

When your husband does something you appreciate, it’s nice to let him know. #MarriedWomen

tick tick

Do you realize that the more you try to force your husband to do something or restrict him, the more he’ll try to escape? #MarriedWomen

tick

Why do you even bother going through his text messages? There’s no need. Stop it. #MarriedWomen

snoop doggie. pls stop.can't stand folks who do that.

Your husband needs time to chill in his ‘man cave’. Please leave him alone. #MarriedWomen

tick

You may not understand why he loves to watch sports or violent movies. You don’t have to understand. Give him his space. #MarriedWomen
Focus on what you love about your husband and please leave the rest. It’s not for you to change him, that’s God’s job. #MarriedWomen

no need to try understand. Just fall asleep with your head in his lap. He'll wake you when he's done with his soccer and horror movies

And yes focus on his good sides.

Make the bed. Thank you. #MarriedWomen

no problem

If you try to control, restrict or cage your husband it will take away that ‘thing’ that makes him a man. He’s a free spirit. #MarriedWomen

tick

Speak clearly. You will be angry with your husband and he will have no idea of what he said or did to annoy you. #MarriedWomen

ok.

Don’t walk away after you’ve spoken your mind to your husband. He will hold it against you and bring it up later. #MarriedWomen

ok

Don’t give your husband the ‘cold shoulder treatment’. He will escape from home. #MarriedWomen

ok

Stop waiting for your husband to arrange a date or give you what you want, take responsibility and create it yourself. #MarriedWomen

ok

Criticism and control will only make your husband shut you out. #MarriedWomen
control is bad. Criticism when healthy is not bad

Sex is a core need for your husband. It anchors his soul to yours. #MarriedWomen
Frequent meaningful physical intimacy is what connects your husband’s heart to yours. #MarriedWomen
Pet your husband. Massage his shoulders. Give him a manicure. #MarriedWomen
If you shut your husband away from physical intimacy then you’ve cut off his most important connection to you in his world. #MarriedWomen

tick tick and more tick


You have to love your husband even when he is unlovable. #MarriedWomen

hmm. Depends on what's making him unlovable at the moment.

Serve your husband even when it seems he doesn’t appreciate your service. #MarriedWomen

Tell me 'hey woman where's my food and why didn't you do my laundry' (in a harsh tone too?)
sorry dude on you're on your own until you show some appreciation

Be sensitive to your husband’s physical needs even when you’re tired. You can do all things thro’ Christ who strengthens you. #MarriedWomen
agreed 5o percent

Please stop airing your dirty laundry in public. Your husband just hates it #MarriedWomen
Teach your children to respect their father. Make them see him as a hero. #MarriedWomen
Please make your house a welcoming home. #MarriedWomen

tick tick

This night out thing with the ‘girls’ is really a risky thing you’re doing. #MarriedWomen

mmm. Ok

Protect your husband. There are she-wolves out there. #MarriedWomen

how? Iron boxers and padlock on his kini? Unless he tripped and fell into a wide open pucci,I don't see how it's her job to protect him from his wandering blokos(if he has one that is)

Do all things without grumbling and complaining. #MarriedWomen

depends on what it is. Open to mischievous interpretation

It’s not nice when your husband is the subject of your girlfriend’s gossip and petty quarrels. He’s a man. Protect him. #MarriedWomen
Pick your battles. Don’t sweat the small stuff. Don’t fight over little matters. You only stress yourself out. #MarriedWomen

tick

Be very careful about reading romance novels. They give you a false illusion of life. #MarriedWomen
Please stop comparing your husband with anyone else’s. Do you know how they live? #MarriedWomen
Accept your husband for what he is and not what you want him to be. #MarriedWomen

tick

Source : Twitter @drtonyrapu

cococandy: @crackhaus.
Here
Ok I guess it's a lil' more than 5 percent

cococandy: @crackhaus.
Here
Ok I guess it's a lil' more than 5 percent

Sophyrocks:

I agree with you on what you agree with. All the same it was a nice post from the pastor. Now we are seeing posts addressing both married men and women. Most men did not agree with the one given to them. Instead they turned that thread to a war zone. It Shows Ego if not controlled, is a bad trait to have as a man and most men are not concerned with how well marriage goes. they believe the women should be in control of that yet they should still remain Heads of their homes. Pity.

crackhaus:
Lol...you didn't need to do that, you miss the point.

If you're allowed to disagree with some of these points just as most women will, why was it a big deal when some dudes disagreed with the male version?

The point is only a man will understand that certain rules regarding men will not apply, just as it's only a woman that will understand that certain rules don't apply regarding them. C'est fini.

cococandy: Well disagreeing with a few of his points would be understandable than disagreeing with all of them.
So that was the issue. They didn't pick some and agree with some. They overlooked everything.

Not my business though. I only did that cos you asked.

crackhaus:
Lol...you didn't need to do that, you miss the point.

If you're allowed to disagree with some of these points just as most women will, why was it a big deal when some dudes disagreed with the male version?

The point is only a man will understand that certain rules regarding men will not apply, just as it's only a woman that will understand that certain rules don't apply regarding them. C'est fini.

Nashville: PT is still looking good and he is about 58.

Anyway good advice. Marriage is not as complex as people make it sound. It all starts by loving yourself and understanding your spouse.

Good advise PT.

But the biggest thing women need to know is the respect part. It cannot be over-emphasized.

crackhaus:
Here is my point being made again.

Women are allowed to disagree with some of theirs but when the men disagreed with some of theirs, it became an ego problem?

Sophyrocks:

Of course yes its an Ego problem. At least we women in this thread agreed with a lot of what was said here in the Op. But compare it with the reaction gotten from Men in the other thread. It was a war zone. You were even the first to counter the pastor. You mockingly called him a pastor for women. Come On!! Dnt pretend.
you disagreed with absolutely everything that was said in that post for married men. Shows Ego will continue to be a Huge problem for you guys. You are all immune to counsel but want women to be counselled. Pffffft.

crackhaus:
Hehehe... The married ladies are sure gonna love this

crackhaus:
I would be surprised if he (the pastor) comes up
with one for women.
Most of these new generation pastors are very
woman-friendly, no offence meant but they like
women no be small.

I can just imagine ladies chanting 'ride on pastor'
from the audience when he preaches.

crackhaus:
This was my first comment on that thread:



And this was the second in response to someone I quoted:



So which of these directly or indirectly gives the notion that I was in disagreement with anything on that post for #marriedmen?

bukatyne: @Cococandy: Totally agree with you

But all in all, they are very good and helpful points for marriage. It now depend on both parties to adapt it to suit them. Will definitely be reading from time to time

Nashville, want to discuss something with you but before then, do you and madam do joint account/project account?

Nashville:

We had a joint account that is no longer functional. We kinda have different spending habits - me I am a bit calculated in my spending and madam isn't used to that. Not saying I am Ijebu but I can be quite frugal with money.

The important thing is to set clearly defined investment goals based on your incomes. Once you have those goals defined and you are meeting them - having a joint account or not isn't important.

bukatyne: @Cococandy: Totally agree with you
But all in all, they are very good and helpful points for marriage. It now depend on both parties to adapt it to suit them. Will definitely be reading from time to time
Nashville, want to discuss something with you but before then, do you and madam do joint account/project account?

aisha2:

If this isnt restricted to Nashvile I say Joint / Project account is good but depends on the couple. We had one even before we married because we knew the kind of life we wanted so a percentage of both incomes goes there and it helps us stay on track and disciplined, no way I can take money out for clothes and shoes, if we want a new car, we can decide what we want and how long we need to save for it. Its also good to have security money when health challenges or unforseen circumstances come its always good to know you have money you can count on

UjSizzle: I'm fine with everything but this
"This night out thing with the ‘girls’ is really a risky thing you’re doing."

Why is it ok to let him retreat to his man-cave(what's that btw?) and not ok for her to hangout with her girls?

bukatyne:

He is a man; you are a woman

Deal with it

UjSizzle: I'm fine with everything but this
"This night out thing with the ‘girls’ is really a risky thing you’re doing."

Why is it ok to let him retreat to his man-cave(what's that btw?) and not ok for her to hangout with her girls?