I watched a movie(How I met your mother) sometime back. And in that movie there was an argument about who is the reacher and who is the settler in a particular relationship. Then I realised, there actually must be a reacher and a settler in every relationship to have a scale of balance. Since there can't be two alpha-dogs in a relationship!

The settler is the "alpha-dog", which means he/she settles for someone who might be considered as below their standard. He/she is never jealous or worried about the partner cheating or leaving the relationship, cos they believe they are the best their partner can ever get.

While the reacher is the one who is desperately seeking to please the partner, do everything to keep him /her. They can also be less attractive in features. And they consider themselves lucky to have their settler-partner, de do everything to make sure the relationship stays.

I don't think it's a matter up for discussion in a relationship,cos it can cause kasala! So just assess your relationship and decide for yourself, who is the reacher and the settler. So that you don't keep doing yanga until your settler leaves you. And if you're the settler, try not to lord it over your reacher!

#My_Charity_Comment

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