Op may not believe this but you are suffering from a psychiatric disorder.
I know a man like you who trusted his wife so much he put her on a pedestal like she could never do anything to hurt him. Just before they got married however they had a quarrel and the woman spent the night in her boyfriend's house. She confessed later and was forgiven but afterwards when the strains of marriage started coming in(it will always come) he began to imagine she was cheating on him again.

He would pretend to go to work then go back to spy on her at home. He would check her call logs regularly, he would pick her phone at random and scroll through her texts. Things got really bad when he started trailing her to market and attacking any male that so much as waved at her.

This is more than a trust issue. This is an obsession. Your friend should secretly make out time to see a psychiatrist who will explain further and what he should do.

In the meantime this will be difficult but he should stop spying on her. Its for his own good. He should stop looking through her phones, after all the spyware he installed has shown him that nothing is going on. He should seriously see a psychiatrist or he'll end up divorcing his wife for nothing.

I don't think you really love your wife cos if you do her past won't affect your actions. You are judging her for telling you the truth. You need to work on yourself cos even if you divorce her you will also not trust the next woman you marry cos u will still have de same tots. The next woman might even have a more horrible past. If u want your marriage to work its in your hands.

You are watching life pass you by as bitterness eats you up like cancer. Have you thought of the effect of divorce on your kid? You know its possible to get another 'faithful' woman that can shorten your span or make you take to negative habits instead of another divorce in the eyes of society. If you are not careful, what you fear like job will come upon you and this time she will not be sorry cos you pushed her and you then will be bitter with yourself and the world. You are telling her it doesnt pay to be honest(even with your forcing her, she could have kept quiet but for conscience sake and YOUR WORD to be by her) Cant you see you are emotionally starving her, the easiest way for a woman to cheat. Its obvious she is sorry. I think she is the one that can help you. First both of you should apologise to each other, afterwhich you open up to her that you love her and want to forgive her but it hasnt been easy. Eat your pride and tell her what and why you have been acting the way you did. Make her know you dont want to judge her anymore and that she should please do same and help you by using signs, gentle words to call you to order when go back as this will take time. You should be willing to listen to her, not be defensive and make amends. You both should freely, without shame or ego talk about progress and areas that need correction. If you willingly and lovingly lead her to be relax, i see her as your help, also it will be difficult for her to cheat again knowing what it took to get your trust back. If you patiently work this you will easily communicate and solve future challenges.

Get over it!!! It was your choice, You decided to take her back before marriage and once you have impregnated her you want to turn her into a single mother? Selfish!

If you want to move on from it you need to get over it, that's all.

You friend shouldn't have married her if he knew he couldn't forgive and forget.

love dont cost a thing they say, it is obvious the love is still there just try and build the home you have always dreamt of like a fairy tale... God is your strenght

Some of the responses I've seen here are either childish or not helping @ all. The poster was clear enough to explain his predicament for you to help, not cause more issues. Someone even suggested passing the wife to him to marry... To prove what, perfection? No one is, cause you'll always get ur own fair share of challenges. Abeggi!

Back to OP. Like some pple opined, trust is important in marriage. Infact, more important than love itself for some pple, like me. That being said, its clear that some people respect honesty and ability to build trust than others, including me. It once happened to me, but for breach of trust, I couldn't continue with the relationship, cos I knew the unfortunate incident will keep causing issues in the future, like ur case. I forgive, but don't forget easily.

My take: You shouldn't have married her. But now that you have, both of you should go for very sincere counselling, with the hope to get better.

@ Femsyn

What response do you call childish? Are you married? For how long? Let me tell you, during marriage counselling, there are times you tell the particular couple at fault pointblank, the truth to his/her face. Let's analyze his story, he is thinking about divorcing a lady who has done nothing wrong other than confess BEFORE MARRIAGE her infidelity. In order words, he wants to make the lady, a single mother, putting her at a risk of not re-marrying for no fault of hers. If the confession, was made after getting married, he forgave and found himself in this situation, your response of calling us childish will make a lot of sense. You are a man and may never understand what that lady goes through in that house. All I said earlier in my post is to let him know that people out there appreciate that woman he despises, so he should learn to appreciate her.

If he is wise enough to filter the truth from all these posts and not go after what he loves to hear, that should be some good counselling, and that counselling is what he sought for by narrating his predicament. You said, trust is more important than love. But I tell you that...trust and forgiveness are both elements of love. God is a loving father that is why his forgiveness has no limit. Because we love God, that is why we trust in him.

My advise to OP remains, if he is a christian he is obliged not optional to LOVE his wife cos that was his marital vow. Meaning that he must forgive and move on, else he will be breaking the marriage covenant and sinning against God. This is some counselling, because it is direct does not mean I am not helping at all.