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He Wants To Turn her into a Robot after Marriage - Family (2) - Nairaland

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Re: He Wants To Turn her into a Robot after Marriage by EfemenaXY: 5:47am On Oct 30, 2014
shymexx:


Yes, you do have a point.

But women also need to learn the art of earning respect.

And I also think women also need to stop trying to date men far above their class/level. When the differential between the two parties is too wide, the opinions might sound somewhat harebrained, to be honest. grin


Excuse me??!

Shymexx, come back here and explain that bit sharpish - preferably with real life examples!

And for what it's worth, what about opportunistic guys trying to date way above their class and educational achievement? Similar to the "Omata" example Moca's just given?

Or the real ugly-looking ones desperate to breed with women whose looks are far superior to theirs? Remember, not all of us are wowed by the size or depth of a man's pockets. For this group, it's a heinous crime for an ugly dude to look our way.

Now where's Kanwulia, LyndaRoyce, and Sambarry - a.k.a Kulyie when you need them the most?

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Re: He Wants To Turn her into a Robot after Marriage by Nobody: 6:31am On Oct 30, 2014
Kanwulia:
Only in places like Nigeria can women be "planted" in bedrooms or shops!
Happy germination ladies! grin
maybe they look like a seed that should be planted...grin
Re: He Wants To Turn her into a Robot after Marriage by Kanwulia: 8:48am On Oct 30, 2014
wakacome:
maybe they look like a seed that should be planted...grin

More like "dummies"! grin
Re: He Wants To Turn her into a Robot after Marriage by Nobody: 3:24pm On Oct 30, 2014
EfemenaXY:

Excuse me??!

Shymexx, come back here and explain that bit sharpish - preferably with real life examples!

And for what it's worth, what about opportunistic guys trying to date way above their class and educational achievement? Similar to the "Omata" example Moca's just given?

Or the real ugly-looking ones desperate to breed with women whose looks are far superior to theirs? Remember, not all of us are wowed by the size or depth of a man's pockets. For this group, it's a heinous crime for an ugly dude to look our way.

Now where's Kanwulia, LyndaRoyce, and Sambarry - a.k.a Kulyie when you need them the most?

My point is: once you date someone who's far superior to you in everything, it will be difficult for that person to acknowledge anything you have to say. And I guess that's what happens in marriages where partners/spouses become robotic figures. For example: a super rich and successful guy married to just any struggling chic he picked from the gutter, definitely won't care about her opinions. Ditto a supremely intelligent academic with a Ph.D married to just any airhead. The air of superiority will always be there, and her opinions would often sound hare-brained to him. Hence it's always better for folks to stick to where they belong, and if at all they want to date higher, the gap shouldn't be too wide.

It's a two-way street. Guys who marry way above their class/level also don't get any respect. In most cases: their spouses always dominate them and, that's the honest truth.
Re: He Wants To Turn her into a Robot after Marriage by bukatyne(f): 3:27pm On Oct 30, 2014
shymexx:


Yes, you do have a point.

But women also need to learn the art of earning respect.

And I also think women also need to stop trying to date men far above their class/level. When the differential between the two parties is too wide, the opinions might sound somewhat harebrained, to be honest. grin


100% except she is willing to be a robot cheesy
Re: He Wants To Turn her into a Robot after Marriage by EfemenaXY: 3:34pm On Oct 30, 2014
shymexx:


My point is: once you date someone who's far superior to you in everything, it will be difficult for that person to acknowledge anything you have to say. And I guess that's what happens in marriages where partners/spouses become robotic figures. For example: a super rich and successful guy married to just any struggling chic he picked from the gutter, definitely won't care about her opinions. Ditto a supremely intelligent academic with a Ph.D married to just any airhead. The air of superiority will always be there, and her opinions would often sound hare-brained to him. Hence it's always better for folks to stick to where they belong, and if at all they want to date higher, the gap shouldn't be too wide.

It's a two-way street. Guys who marry way above their class/level also don't get any respect. In most cases: their spouses always dominate them and, that's the honest truth.


Hmmm...okay...

But what about respect? What role has that got to play in relationships, irrespective of who's "superior"?
Re: He Wants To Turn her into a Robot after Marriage by Nobody: 3:50pm On Oct 30, 2014
EfemenaXY:

Hmmm...okay...

But what about respect? What role has that got to play in relationships, irrespective of who's "superior"?

Respect is subjective in this case. He might respect her in certain aspects like: cooking, sex etc.. But she will have to earn the respect that will make her competitive when it comes to decision making. And the air of superiority will always be a hindrance to that lol.

It comes with the territory.
Re: He Wants To Turn her into a Robot after Marriage by SAMBARRY: 7:27pm On Oct 31, 2014
Efemena i see you calling me o jare. So



where do all these bush meats surface from sef undecided






Do you work only because of money or to feel fulfilled. Where do all these bushmeats spring out from sef.them no go school ni abi the ones wey go school them no tell them say working supercedes money. When they sack the man from work tomorrow now , he will blame his wife that is economically dependent on him for money



abi shey until e reach stage wey them dey lock shirt for their neck for money for soup or brasserie before he uses his senses

Anyway no need for long story. He dey find doormat. So op, go village, lets say one village in ekiti, you will see what you are looking for. Awon baba seyi abeg money for soup we wan chop lipsrsealed



next
Re: He Wants To Turn her into a Robot after Marriage by ancashy(f): 9:28am On Nov 02, 2014
EfemenaXY:


Precisely.

It's now up to her to air her views now and see if they can both work towards an amicable solution. Now is the time for her to make her voice heard loud and clear. Pre-marriage and not post-marriage.

what if d man says yes,just so dey could get married,or after months or years changes his mind,reverts to his old decision,or makes her working life unbearable complaining of working hours,biZ trips e.t.c,abeg dis kind of man must have been dreaming of house wife since he started planning his future.
Re: He Wants To Turn her into a Robot after Marriage by austine4real(m): 4:18pm On Nov 02, 2014
MmmmHmmmmm
i smell insecurity
Re: He Wants To Turn her into a Robot after Marriage by EfemenaXY: 9:49pm On Nov 02, 2014
ancashy:
what if d man says yes,just so dey could get married,or after months or years changes his mind,reverts to his old decision,or makes her working life unbearable complaining of working hours,biZ trips e.t.c,abeg dis kind of man must have been dreaming of house wife since he started planning his future.

Two things:

~ First of all, you can't go through life saddled with unanswered "what if questions". There is always an element of risk when you choose to spend the rest of your life with someone. However, you can curtail the amount of risk you're willing to take by clearly stating what you can and can't do...and what you can and can't live with.

~ Secondly, a man who says "yes" to all without discussion even though hemay not be in agreement, just so he can wed you is a dishonest man - and such a man would have shown or demonstrated elements of his untruthfulness while courting you. One can only keep up the pretence for so long. He will crack eventually. This is why it pays yo ne observant during courtship.
Re: He Wants To Turn her into a Robot after Marriage by slimyem: 10:50pm On Nov 02, 2014
I regard most women in these situations lazy,thoughtless and ambitionless women whose husbands get to ride on that and they in turn make an excuse of it.
No one can robot you if you don't let yourself be roboted and I really would not agree it has a lot to do with marrying a man above your level. Even ladies who are married to less educated men still let themselves be strung into such situations. It would shock you that some of these women even enjoy it and only cry foul for it's sake or when things are going wrong.
A colleague who recently got married to a barely educated businessman is secretly hoping and praying that her husband would demand that she resigns her job. If it does happen, won't her story just be "My husband doesn't want me to work"?
..."giving a dog a bad name" is what it is in the most cases I've seen. I say no one can stop you unless you want to be stopped.

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Re: He Wants To Turn her into a Robot after Marriage by stanprexy(m): 5:12am On Nov 05, 2014
nicechic:
Ladies in the house. What will be your reaction if ur fiance' doesn't want you to secure a gov't job when he marries you?
Well,he feels he has all it takes to take care of u and d kids, and wit the flimzy excuse that men will be disturbing u at ur place of work.
He rather prefers to plant you in a shop or supermarket, after all the stress of studying hard to pass in the university. Thereby rendering ur certificate useless.

Ladies, would you go ahead with the engagement? And guys....what's ur take on it?
Basically, it isn't the woman's job to fend for the family. If the husband said he is capable, why not relax and submit to his demands. Or you want to tell me, you are going to marry your certificate.
Re: He Wants To Turn her into a Robot after Marriage by ancashy(f): 5:54am On Nov 05, 2014
[quote author=EfemenaXY post=27673051]

Two things:

~ First of all, you can't go through life saddled with unanswered "what if questions". There is always an element of risk when you choose to spend the rest of your life with someone. However, you can curtail the amount of risk you're willing to take by clearly stating what you can and can't do...and what you can and can't live with.

~....... she has not only observed,she has heard with her ears,no fulfilling marriage without an agreement both verbal and non verbal to help each other achieve our dreams and goals,cos dat is wat fulfills us,d fulfillment is more when we achieve dis togeda,there is risk and dere is calculated risk,in dis case d lady's fulfillment seems to be in her career(working mother)while for d man is house wife stuff. Just saying,b very clear, and avoid future under current tensions dey chip at a relationship gradually till it dissolves,especially marriage

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