This reminds me of the acronym we Nigerians use for old houses with rooms opposite each other in ghetto areas, “face me I face you.” Or “Face me I slap You.”

Living in face me I slap you might be disgusting to some people. Maybe they hadn’t the opportunity to live or stay in that kind of areas. But to some people it seems normal staying in that kind of area. Not because is conducive but because they can’t afford better living houses in a good and better environment.
A woman once told me this story of the first time she visited her cousin in Lagos. She’s kind of a working class lady living in a better house in the beautiful city of Portharcort, but on getting to Lagos, she saw what she felt was the most disgusting area she had ever visited in her life. She got to Lagos and her cousin came to pick her up from the airport and off to her house. She couldn’t believe her eyes what she saw when they got to her place. She couldn’t believe that her so called cousin who lied to them that she had a good job and a comfortable house in Lagos was staying in “face me I slap you”. According to her narration.
Immediately we got to her place, the odour that came out of the compound was like an abattoir. Opposite my cousin’s room was their toilet, a general toilet were about 18 people use. The toilet has no door. When one is going there, he or she has to go with a wrapper to cover the edges of the door so that nobody will see you when you are doing your thing. Almost everywhere in the compound was full of children’s poo.
This kind of experience was bad that I wondered if they are able to identify their neighbors because about 8 people stay in a room. For the period I stayed in the compound, many come in and people are leaving.
At the center of my cousin’s room and the toilet was a drainage canal with dirty and smelling water passing through. When kids wash, they throw the water inside the canal, including dirt and all will be drained along with the water. At night everywhere would be smelling that I began to wonder how they cope and no one was yet dead because of the smell. The smell alone can make someone go out of their senses.
Coupled with all that were Mosquitoes that are so big, their eyes look like touch lights flying all around. The noise in the compound sounds like group of village men going to war. At about 10:00pm that night, i found out that i couldn’t sleep as the smell oozing out of the toilet was so heavy, i was even hearing the sound of that thing as the person inside the toilet was forcing it out.
i was supposed to spend about 4 days at her place(cousin), but changed my mind the next morning when, at about 6:00am when i went outside to see if i could manage the toilet. As i walked out of the door, i saw one of the neighbors urinating inside a small bowl in front of her door, after urinating she poured it into the flowing canal and kept the bowl in front of her door. What i saw next was a man who came out of the room the woman went in. I guess that was the woman’s husband. The man just came out, took the bowl on the floor, went to a drum close by and took water from it with the bowl and was washing his mouth with the water from the bowl and immediately one of their kids came out of the room and he used the water to wash up the kid’s face and the mouth. I was like, “what is this.” I immediately went inside and packed my bags, told my cousin i was leaving. I couldn’t take it anymore. Abeg I no wan die before my time.

http://www.hovabuzz.com/frontline/948-her-weird-experience-of-face-me-i-face-you-house-in-lagos

#Lol

Gross.....damn it.......I leave in a public compound but men......this ain't happening