What you about to read was part of my experiences during my NYSC service year in Abuja, i will try my best in putting down what i could still remember, enjoy it.
shout out to all corp members out there, NYSC could be one of the best things that could ever happen to any Nigeria youth (if not posted to Chibok or Bama)

Abeg, na free-style I wan use dis one do....no be english test-book i wan write oooo!! so make una no mind some of my errormatic blondalisim in it vocalicious enormousity.

70% fiction
30% non-fiction.
you can still follow some of my write-up on
https://www.nairaland.com/1875823/corridor-hell
https://www.nairaland.com/1795743/day-died-april-14
https://www.nairaland.com/2069007/home-coming
https://www.nairaland.com/1795882/enigma

*******
****
“……under the sun and in the rain
With dedication and selflessness
Nigeria’s ours, Nigeria we serve!!”
That was the familiar chorus that kept playing itself unconsciously inside my head as I walked along one of the unfamiliar streets called Karu in Abuja. The sun had showed me no mercy that afternoon as it smiled and even ‘over-smiled’ at me, I felt like I had offended Mother Nature.
“Ope oo!!” I hailed a sign of relief as I finally sighted ‘Greenland Educational Services’ on a big sign-post which was infront of a building, I had to verify again if that was the name on my posting letter….and yes it was. I rushed to open the school gate and was confronted by a very short statured man dressed in one of this hired security guard uniform….as in dis guard was literarily a ‘security dwarf’.
“Wetin I fit do for you young man?” the security dwarf said as he tried to intimidate me by squizzing his ugly-puff puff-looking face at me (He was even looking up to my face).
“good afternoon sir, I am here to see the school administrator” I calmly replied as I looked down to his ugly face.
“For wetin?” he grumbly enquired.
---for water ni----
“I was posted to this school for my PPA” I replied
“For your wetin? He asked looking confused
“For my PPA” I replied immediately like I was expecting such a question.
“Wetin be PPA?” the short man devil asked again
----Place of Poverty Alleviation, idiot----
“Place of Primary Assignment!!” I almost yelled at that thing called a security guard
“Place of primary assignment……for dis place?” he asked ignorantly after taking a long glance at the building behind him to confirm if I hadn’t missed my way.
----This man is beginning to test my patience, he has got no idea what I had passed through in a totally unfamiliar city in search of this place….if I kick dis man like football ehnn!!----
“Sir, look at it, it is stated here on the letter that I should report to this place as soon as possible” I stretched the letter towards him as he grabbed it from me like it was a search-warrant. The security-dwarf grumbled as he ‘supposedly’ read through the letter. After about what seems like an hour, he finally raised his head to meet my frustrated face.
“I no even understand wetin dey inside dis tin sef, na whis kain english dey use take write dis one again oo? He looked up to me and asked.
----I swear I felt like smacking his face with my ‘orange boot’----
I swallowed my anger like an enduring Jehovah-witness and practically snatched my letter from him, he must have seen how angry I was and he called “Professor” near- by to come read the letter. Professor who was sitting under an MTN logoed umbrella (commercial call center) walked up to the security dwarf.
“Professor abeg I no understand wetin dis boy here dey talk since morning, him talk sey he dey look for Pamary Asisstance” he explained to this Professor guy.
----olodo rabata, first-class illiterate----
“It is called Place of Primary Assignment” I corrected
“Any how sha!!”
This Professor guy turned to me to help and I explained my situation to him, he collected the letter and unlike the security dwarf, he went through it in less than 5sec. He told me that I was yet to locate the ‘Greenland educational services’ that I still have to walk almost a mile through a near-by junction. He explained that the signboard was just placed on the building to serve as a pointer to passer-by. I was advised by this young guy called professor to take a ‘bike’ to my destination.
----OSG (Omo See Gobe), another Israelite journey season 2----
As I turned to leave, I asked a last question to satisfy my curiosity for this young guy’s professorship, his command of English was a top notch, he was neatly dreased, he held a book in his hand and I could see something like ‘Company and Allied….’ Boldly written on it cover and there are still other enormous sized books on his plastic table, he also seem composed and well learned but he is obviously too young to have attained such a prestigious and learned tittle (no be for Nigeria)
“I hope you don’t mind if I ask you a question?” I enquired
“No problem, as long as it is in English, French, Latin, and Arabic Language”
----Kilode, u be winsh?----

*****
*******

laughingggg.....place of poverty Alleviation Naija shaa

bros is that the end of your story? of course na under the sun but not in the rain; na so i dey sing my own. for camp rain fall even the RMD and his boys run to go take cover. person way compose that anthem no try at all.

lenmafon:
bros is that the end of your story? of course na under the sun but not in the rain; na so i dey sing my own. for camp rain fall even the RMD and his boys run to go take cover. person way compose that anthem no try at all.

chai!!, i just dey read ur comment since Feb 6. (u go don old o)
Never knew i had this story going on, I even had to laugh at my own write-up. So funny.
Na to continue sure pass!!