1. I have this view... If I marry this man, and have a child with him... Maybe I should get it out of my head but I can't help it: I think; since he loves me so much and wants to spend rest of his life with me, since I'm the woman he's in love with; then if he makes a child with me, he should love that child more. More than the one he made with a slutty ex by accident, who is still behaving in an evil way. (additional info: she tricked him and got pregnant on purpose, and after 1.5-2 years cheated)

What do you think about this? Do you think men love their children more if those children are made with a woman they're in love with? Do you think I'm right in wishing for such a thing?

Because I have always thought having a child with the one you love is one of the most beautiful and special things in life. And those children are fruits of love, and they are lovelier and more loving people themselves....

I like that little child, but sometimes I find myself resentful that he loves the child of such a slut so much. And then I think; if he's gonna love my child at the same level; then what's special about it...What's special about having a child with the one you love and all?

*****

2. I also think, his child with his ex ( 4 now) might influence the children I will have with him in a bad way, if she came living with us. Sometimes I think it might be nice... but sometimes I think she will be an outsider, kind of like a secret agent; not exactly from the family; representing a slutty mother, and maybe sometimes reminding her, or defending her. Kind of like a dark cloud above the happiness of the family. Keeping us from behaving comfortably, or keeping us from just being the family; like for example preventing me from telling my children how I met the love of my life, their father, my future husband, because she might get jealous or something. Lots of things like that.... What do you think about this?

My man said she might put her mother's picture in her own room when she comes living with us, or even a picture of the mother and my man and the child together (as a family!!?!!!) and he said as much as he wouldn't like this, he should be and also I should be ok with this...

3. Sometimes it's also bothering me that she has a part of him... That way she made herself "forever" remaining in his life, that way or the other. In a way, she still has power over him. As if, he, in a way, partially belongs to her. Despite him saying he hates her badly and everything and they don't even have a proper friendly conversation. He is the father of her child. And he's crazy about her (his) child! There's no stronger bond than that!

Then, I love him so much and he's exactly what I'm looking for.... And we have a beautiful, lovely, romantic relationship and we get on well, have similar views in life and similar mindset, talk about anything and everything for hours, value each other deeply....

And then I find myself upset and. And I need advice on these bothering issues!

Can I silence these thoughts?

SHOULD I RISK?

SHOULD I LEAVE?

this your dream get k-leg o


abeg sleep so that you go dream another one


if you continue with this yeye 'dream-man', he and him baby mama and dem pikin fit collabo use you for money rishual

buygala:
this your dream get k-leg o


abeg sleep so that you go dream another one


if you continue with this yeye 'dream-man', he and him baby mama and dem pikin fit collabo use you for money rishual

why do you think so?

If his ex is slutty, then so are you.

Shows he likes slutty types.

tpiah11:
If his ex is slutty, then so are you.

Shows he likes slutty types.

Why? Because slutty is something like eye color and you can definately detect on the first date?

I explained why she is slutty. She tricked and she cheated.

No need to make an insulting comment. Watch your tongue.

Enegod:

Oh... Can you pass me a cigarette as well?

So is that a hopeless case?

*sips my orijin*

LostMermaid:


Oh... Can you pass me a cigarette as well?

So is that a hopeless case?

very hopeless... You need something stronger than cigarette...

If I'd be blunt with u, I'd rather u leave cos you'd remain unhappy for the rest of ur life or u could be tempted to harm the 'slut'.

Some desperate women would rather just create problems for men all because they never want him to be happy. Having a child for a man when he never actually wanted it is the worst feeling ever.

You scare me. You're gonna be those evil step mom. The child is innocent and you are getting too involved in an affair that is non of your business. Know your lane because all children are made the same way. Ps thats his first born child and if you was a real woman you would love and respect your man enough to mind your own business. You sound very immature you hear telling us what he told you about his ex and best believe if you two break up he'll be telling the next chick that you were a whoree and all sort. Cut a long story short grow up.

LostMermaid:


why do you think so?

na just now i see your moniker ...... very scary....


Oga mermaid, abeg just carry your wahala go front o.... I no put mouth again


please feel free to have the man, his child and his baby mama for dinner.... it is your birthright

LostMermaid:


Why? Because slutty is something like eye color and you can definately detect on the first date?

I explained why she is slutty. She tricked and she cheated.

No need to make an insulting comment. Watch your tongue.

if you did not consider slutty insulting in your op, why is it insulting now?

the fact is, the guy has a type, which is slutty.

If you were not slutty, he wouldn't be dating you.

should be obvious imo.

Bruv you trying to kill me
Me never laff so loud 》》》

buygala:
na just now i see your moniker ...... very scary....


Oga mermaid, abeg just carry your wahala go front o.... I no put mouth again :X


please feel free to have the man, his child and his baby mama for dinner.... it is your birthright

tpiah11:


if you did not consider slutty insulting in your op, why is it insulting now?

the fact is, the guy has a type, which is slutty.

If you were not slutty, he wouldn't be dating you.

should be obvious imo.

What makes you think if you have one gf that turns out to be slutty, you will always and always have slutty gf's for the rest of your life?

Most girls like bad boys in teen ages; that doesn't mean they also marry one.

I'm a lady. I'm not slutty. I never tricked and never cheated. She's slutty because she cheated on him, and also kept flirting with men she had slept before him. He wanted to leave her, but was stuck cause she got pregnant.

Now I need you need to fix your way of thinking; assuming if you date someone they turn out to be bad; it will always be the same. Just the opposite, you learn your lesson; and find a much better person next time. "Once burned, twice shy".

Also fix your manners. You don't know me. You can't call me slutty. Me calling a woman who "cheated on" the father of her child, "slutty", is certainly not an excuse for you to be disrespectful to me.

Traits of becoming a wicked step mother.

anyways this post should be on family not romance

aunty op

go through your write up again and read what you wrote.

few examples [in case you don't get it] :

I find myself resentful that he loves the child of such a slut so much

I think she will be an outsider, kind of like a secret agent; not exactly from the family; representing a slutty mother, and maybe sometimes reminding her, or defending her. Kind of like a dark cloud above the happiness of the family. Keeping us from behaving comfortably, or keeping us from just being the family

for example preventing me from telling my children how I met the love of my life, their father, my future husband, because she might get jealous or something

I'm the woman he's in love with; then if he makes a child with me, he should love that child more

has it occurred to you love utterances might have also passed between him and his baby mama same way it's passing between him and you?

I guess until you see what the baby mama saw, you'll still continue to rain fire and brimstone for that little 4 year old baby who did not send any of you message.

lastly, why exactly are you with someone with kids, since you don't like the idea of baby daddies? Is he rich or something.

and have you checked to see if there are other kids from this "soul mate" of yours besides the one you know and are abusing here. maybe other women tricked him also.

as per slutty, read your write up once again, its all over it, no offence. But if the man likes that type, why are you sensitive about it?

.

LostMermaid:
1. I have this view... If I marry this man, and have a child with him... Maybe I should get it out of my head but I can't help it: I think; since he loves me so much and wants to spend rest of his life with me, since I'm the woman he's in love with; then if he makes a child with me, he should love that child more. More than the one he made with a slutty ex by accident, who is still behaving in an evil way. (additional info: she tricked him and got pregnant on purpose, and after 1.5-2 years cheated)

What do you think about this? Do you think men love their children more if those children are made with a woman they're in love with? Do you think I'm right in wishing for such a thing?

Because I have always thought having a child with the one you love is one of the most beautiful and special things in life. And those children are fruits of love, and they are lovelier and more loving people themselves....

I like that little child, but sometimes I find myself resentful that he loves the child of such a slut so much. And then I think; if he's gonna love my child at the same level; then what's special about it...What's special about having a child with the one you love and all?

*****

2. I also think, his child with his ex ( 4 now) might influence the children I will have with him in a bad way, if she came living with us. Sometimes I think it might be nice... but sometimes I think she will be an outsider, kind of like a secret agent; not exactly from the family; representing a slutty mother, and maybe sometimes reminding her, or defending her. Kind of like a dark cloud above the happiness of the family. Keeping us from behaving comfortably, or keeping us from just being the family; like for example preventing me from telling my children how I met the love of my life, their father, my future husband, because she might get jealous or something. Lots of things like that.... What do you think about this?

My man said she might put her mother's picture in her own room when she comes living with us, or even a picture of the mother and my man and the child together (as a family!!?!!!) and he said as much as he wouldn't like this, he should be and also I should be ok with this...

3. Sometimes it's also bothering me that she has a part of him... That way she made herself "forever" remaining in his life, that way or the other. In a way, she still has power over him. As if, he, in a way, partially belongs to her. Despite him saying he hates her badly and everything and they don't even have a proper friendly conversation. He is the father of her child. And he's crazy about her (his) child! There's no stronger bond than that!

Then, I love him so much and he's exactly what I'm looking for.... And we have a beautiful, lovely, romantic relationship and we get on well, have similar views in life and similar mindset, talk about anything and everything for hours, value each other deeply....

And then I find myself upset and. And I need advice on these bothering issues!

Can I silence these thoughts?

SHOULD I RISK?

SHOULD I LEAVE?

Stop being such a douche bag, judgemental prick. Calling someone else a slut and placing your yet unborn children above this child. You already sound like an evil step mother to me.

Op of course he will love his child even if her mother is a demon. Its absolutely wrong for you to want him to love your child more. You already know he is a good father so whichever one he loves most will only be known to him. I see you causing a lot of problems in that family with your insecurity. Please find someone else without a child.