Human beings with different philosophy to the issues of life. For quite a time, I have been pondering over this question within me yet the underline reason(s) remain undivulged. One faithful day, I was still very much awake when I coincidentally tuned to this particular programm on a radio. A text sent by one particular young man really captivated my attention. Lo and behold, the text goes thus: "My girl friend said i cannot settle down with you because you are a pastor in the making. Please, what can i do because i trully love her and cant afford to let her go" What a touching one. I couldnt help than to cast my mind back to a conversation that spark up between a lady and I.
Lady: I can never marry a pastor
me: Why?
Lady: It is never going to be possible....
The end of that conversation was nothing to write home about. In a similar senerio, a friend of mine said to my face: "Bro Emma, I like you but please I don't want you to become a pastor... It seems you are already moving towards that direction." Pastor or no pastor, I was stunned for a very long time,again!
So,what is actually wrong to be a pastor and marrying a pastor( on a general note)?

They feel the pastor will not ve time for them on sundays and pastors are not aware of what is trendy

Pastors live off people's offerings and tithes. No woman wants a man who doesn't have a real job/business except waiting for people who have jobs to pay offerings and tithes.

If a pastor could have some other more dignified avenue for revenue women probably won't mind marrying them. There is dignity in working.

The fear of being a pastor's wife...

Genuine pastors are now rare. The ones called by God not the ones that call themselves

purplesummer:
Pastors live off people's offerings and tithes. No woman wants a man who doesn't have a real job/business except waiting for people who have jobs to pay offerings and tithes.

If a pastor could have some other more dignified avenue for revenue women probably won't mind marrying them. There is dignity in working.

you have a point!

master2000:
They feel the pastor will not ve time for them on sundays and pastors are not aware of what is trendy

Really? If I may say, but there are still some other jobs that do demand quality time and attention than pastoral work.

purplesummer:
Pastors live off people's offerings and tithes. No woman wants a man who doesn't have a real job/business except waiting for people who have jobs to pay offerings and tithes.

If a pastor could have some other more dignified avenue for revenue women probably won't mind marrying them. There is dignity in working.

Humm! Economic power.

Every lady who say have their reason, Myself for instance don't wanna marry a pastor because 1) I don't like been at the centre of attention. 2) I dey like secular music like kilode (Most pastors see secular pple as devil's children) 3) If u become Pastor's wife, u go fast tire. (I no fit shout jor)

Adinije:
Every lady who say have their reason, Myself for instance don't wanna marry a pastor because 1) I don't like been at the centre of attention. 2) I dey like secular music like kilode (Most pastors see secular pple as devil's children) 3) If u become Pastor's wife, u go fast tire. (I no fit shout jor)

Your 1st reason is especially true within Naija churches. The pastor's wife becomes the "First Lady" lol

Are you a pastor?

Pastors are poor in bed,only know missionary style

Adinije:
Every lady who say have their reason, Myself for instance don't wanna marry a pastor because 1) I don't like been at the centre of attention. 2) I dey like secular music like kilode (Most pastors see secular pple as devil's children) 3) If u become Pastor's wife, u go fast tire. (I no fit shout jor)

You are on point. A Lady once share exactly same view with me. I think ladies shouldn't be scared over suchs...If given a chance, they are easy to abide by.

Hmmmmm. I think the problem is more pronounced if you marry a pastor who is the head of a church. This is because the wife by default becomes the head of all the women in the church. She has to be able to support her husband, entertain issues bothering the women in the church and pray for them. In short she has to be physically and spiritually invested in the work just like her husband. She has to live by example as every of her move (dressing, speech, carriage, e.t.c) will be continually scrutinized. In one of the popular churches we have today, the ladies wear beret because Mummy G.O also likes wearing beret.
For any lady who does not have such a calling from the start, it can be very very difficult to keep up as a pastor's wife and one of the easiest ways to bring a pastor's ministry down oda through his wife. Remember what pastor Chris went through during the divorce saga with his wife.

My pastor in my local assembly told us that he met his wife while she was preaching and distributing gospel tracts to people on a bus queue. You will know that in that case she had already taken the propagation of the gospel seriously and it was thus easy for her to become a pastor's wife.
Pastoring a church is not easy and any woman whose heart is not in it shouldnt marry a pastor. A half hearted pastor's wife will never help the church.

mumumugu:
Pastors are poor in bed,only know missionary style

mumumugu:
Pastors are poor in bed,only know missionary style

Women are wired to see churchy/decent guys as boring..

Awww I wonder why some girls say that too. I've always wanted to marry a pastor, or a bible scholar at least.

Iyawo pastor in the making

akinsadeez:


Pastoring a church is not easy and any woman whose heart is not in it shouldnt marry a pastor. A half hearted pastor's wife will never help the church.

I agree, I'm my pastor's wife's PA, and it isn't an easy role.

Only those destined to be will be called,you cannot fight it

Yet they want a GOD fearing man... Buncha confused entities

akinsadeez:
Hmmmmm. I think the problem is more pronounced if you marry a pastor who is the head of a church. This is because the wife by default becomes the head of all the women in the church. She has to be able to support her husband, entertain issues bothering the women in the church and pray for them. In short she has to be physically and spiritually invested in the work just like her husband. She has to live by example as every of her move (dressing, speech, carriage, e.t.c) will be continually scrutinized. In one of the popular churches we have today, the ladies wear beret because Mummy G.O also likes wearing beret.
For any lady who does not have such a calling from the start, it can be very very difficult to keep up as a pastor's wife and one of the easiest ways to bring a pastor's ministry down oda through his wife. Remember what pastor Chris went through during the divorce saga with his wife.

My pastor in my local assembly told us that he met his wife while she was preaching and distributing gospel tracts to people on a bus queue. You will know that in that case she had already taken the propagation of the gospel seriously and it was thus easy for her to become a pastor's wife.
Pastoring a church is not easy and any woman whose heart is not in it shouldnt marry a pastor. A half hearted pastor's wife will never help the church.

Interesting...

JahzaraAde:
Awww I wonder why some girls say that too. I've always wanted to marry a pastor, or a bible scholar at least.

Iyawo pastor in the making

I can see that you are a lover of the words and kingdom of God. Nice one. May God grants you your heart desire.
By the way, can u tell us basically why you desire to marry a pastor?

Marrying a pastor means you'll have to share him with the whole damn congregation ( less personal time and privacy with him/ her)....You are automatically the first lady of the church( not every woman/man is suitable or willing to accept such position).....People expect too much from you
( creates pressure to become someone you probably aren't)..... Also, may I add too much fasting?

There is no pastor ready to receive a BJ and give cunnilingus besides pastor are too busy

I think it's because being a pastor's wife is a lot of responsibility for most ladies. You have to be well put together everytime, you have to be a role model and even some normal activities will become difficult for you because eyes are watching you

op are u a pastor..??

RaeMystix:
Marrying a pastor means you'll have to share him with the whole damn congregation ( less personal time and privacy with him/ her)....You are automatically the first lady of the church( not every woman/man is suitable or willing to accept such position).....People expect too much from you
( creates pressure to become someone you probably aren't)..... Also, may I add too much fasting?

Fasting? are you afraid of fasting? Lol!

passionate88:
Yet they want a GOD fearing man...

Pls tell them, bro

Kingemmy01:



Fasting? are you afraid of fasting? Lol!

Kingemmy01:

I can see that you are a lover of the words and kingdom of God. Nice one. May God grants you your heart desire.
By the way, can u tell us basically why you desire to marry a pastor?

Personally, I've grown up with the desire to serve a man that serves God's people, and to encourage and submit to a man who is about the work of God.

I understand however that a man does not need to be a senior pastor to do this...

I would love to marry a TRUE man of God, and if being a pastor is his calling, then I'm 100% happy with that. A man after God's heart will understand how to love his wife, even to the point of death, in his desire to emulate the love of Christ.

He'll understand the necessity of biblical headship in a home, and will be able to lead his wife and children in spiritual matters.

I'm very interested in reformed theology, so him knowing how to STUDY and defend the scriptures in depth is a minimal requirement.

Finally, he'll have a worthy vision, and thus would make submission for me as his wife an easy task.

Once again, one does not need to be a recognised as a pastor to have these traits. However, I know that whoever I marry will definitely be the 'pastor' of our home.

Interestingly, most of the guys I'm close to are bible scholars or are in seminary... They are soooo fun to be around, there's never a dull moment!

Ladies who don't want to marry pastors are just not well grounded 'spiritually'
I see no reason why a woman who is compartible with a man choose not to marry him all because he's a pastor.

JahzaraAde:


Personally, I've grown up with the desire to serve a man that serves God's people, and to encourage and submit to a man who is about the work of God.

I understand however that a man does not need to be a senior pastor to do this...

I would love to marry a TRUE man of God, and if being a pastor is his calling, then I'm 100% happy with that. A man after God's heart will understand how to love his wife, even to the point of death, in his desire to emulate the love of Christ.

He'll understand the necessity of biblical headship in a home, and will be able to lead his wife and children in spiritual matters.

I'm very interested in reformed theology, so him knowing how to STUDY and defend the scriptures in depth is a minimal requirement.

Finally, he'll have a worthy vision, and thus would make submission for me as his wife an easy task.

Once again, one does not need to be a recognised as a pastor to have these traits. However, I know that whoever I marry will definitely be the 'pastor' of our home.

Interestingly, most of the guys I'm close to are bible scholars or are in seminary... They are soooo fun to be around, there's never a dull moment!

Well said my dear.
Most ladies want Godfearing men but shy away from pastors forgetting that its just a 'title'.