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Did I Do Anything Wrong With The Gift I Gave To My Pastor's Wife? - Romance - Nairaland

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Did I Do Anything Wrong With The Gift I Gave To My Pastor's Wife? by onismate: 11:36am On Feb 16, 2015
I have never been a stingy guy but people have provoked me. They have made me do what I didn’t want to do. And so I hate were girls would want to scam me. Many girls I had dated turned me to maga. They mugurized me that at a point I began asking why God created eve and women. The last one that happened to me and vowed to stay away from dating for a short time. The little money I had, she was just sucking me dry. And she loved adventure and I gave her that. I took her to the mortuary and her birthday. That experience, she would never forget and she called it quit.
After 3 years of abstaining from relationship, I was ready to date. Infact I want to marry. And I want to get my wife from the church. A real church girl. As so my company transferred me to one of our branches Rivers state. As time went on, I became familiar with the area.
I found myself a church not too far from my house. Not a big church but still a growing house of God. Well, I joined the place because I felt it would be comfortable for me. The first Sunday the pastor asked for first timers to stand up. I didn’t even bother to do so. But it seems they recognized me because they know the faces of their fellow members. And they weren’t much, a little above 55 members as I counted. As the pastor repeated, “if you know you are coming for the first time please stand for the church to welcome you.” I refused to stand. I refused to stand. The pastor had to come to me close to me, “Brother, stand up nah, abi you know be new comer?” he said. You need to see the way everyone was looking at me and was laughing. I smiled and stood. “Ehen, na now you you come,” one of the ushers standing beside me said. So if I no stand, I never come, and Baba God no go bless me! I thought to myself. They welcomed me. They asked me my name, I told them is Titus and I walked for an oil firm, infact it was popular in the town. When I mentioned the name, everyone began to clap in amazement. I began to wonder why they clapped, oh because I said I was working in an oil firm. Or maybe they thought they thought I was going to build refinery there or maybe I think I would be bringing oil money to the church.
After the church service, the pastor and some church members came to my place. I guessed they were amazed by the interior décor and how beautiful my house is.
As time went on, I began loving my new church in the town.
On this particular Sunday service. The Pastor announced that it would be an exchange of gift. We are asked to pick someone who will be a partner, you pray and exchange gift with the person. Before I knew what was happening, usher stella had already rushed to hold my hand were I was standing. I was hoping to get in touch with esther. I so much love the girl esther, one of the choir member. The way she sings and serenades my soul, I loved that which has made me fall in love with her. Infact I had already started picturing how the wedding day would look like and how marriage with her will be. Though I have not approached her; I was planning to do so and we are really good friends and I felt she likes me. I was thinking of how I would get to the choir seat when stella came to hold my hand as a partner. She held me strongly that I began to wonder if she works in a mechanic workshop. As I was being worried of stella holding me, two young women and a man came and said that they had move to partner with me. Well, I didn’t say anything since we are serving the same God. But within me, I had made up my mind to get a gift for sister esther. But was I the only one in the church. So many were still looking for partners and I have 4 already. After the service, wife of the pastor walked up to me, “Bro titus, please get me my own gift next Sunday because am spiritually partnering with you,” she said. Indeed these people has turned me to sadine, mba Titus fish compressing me inside the container. Soon they would start using me to eat bread. Everyone just want to partner with me’ I wondered. Well I took it in good fate that God has blessed me.
During the week, I took one of my female friend and colleague to the market and bought some gifts for my partners in church. I also bought for my dear sister esther a beautiful wrist watch worth N3,000. On Sunday I took all the gifts with my car and brought to church. I gave usher stella a bread toaster. The other 2 women, I inserted N2000 into an envelope and gave to them each. I bought Ankara, 5 yards for the man and N500 on it for the man. My female friend suggested I give my pastor’s wife money which I did, N10,000. I Gave esther the watch and N7000. She was so excited and hugged me so tightly. I had always felt she likes me because sometimes in church, the kind of eye contact we give to each other, odi kwa risky for church girl.
Well, it was my turn. The two women I gave N2000 each came to my house in the evening with a black deep nylon bag. I was excited that atleast they brought something for me even though they considered me rich and comfortable. Thank God my female colleague in the office came to my place and prepared a very good chicken stew and rice the previous day. I offered my guests 2 big fried chicken laps with chilled juice. After devouring my chickens and drank my juice. They stood up and said they were going that they decided to branch to my place as they were coming from the market, then thank me for the gift I gave to them. Chaiii, see as this people take scam my head. So what they are carrying inside the nylon bag was not mine! They were barely passing by to mock me.
Esther came to my place after my two hungry church members left. I gave her a pack of orange juice. She didn’t even spend up to 30 minutes and said she was going that she would come back a few minutes later. She said she wanted to see a friend down the street. Well, for the exchange of gift, she dipped her hand inside her big hand bag and brought out a toilet roll and gave to me. She said that was what she has to give. I watched as she walked out rushing out of my house. Hmmm, she I beg this get toilet roll wey she bring am! Sister esther never came back to my house, and I waited till the next day.
To add salt to injury, I got a text message that evening that N100 has been transferred to me. Immediately after the text, another one came in which read
“blessings of the Lord to you Bro Titus. I believe you have seen the 100 recharge card I sent you. Please manage it. That is my gift to you.”
I checked the number that sent the message and it was my pastor’s wife. Na so I provoke. She no see any other thing send me, e come be say na recharge card. No be even send, she transferred to me. She later called to tell me that that was what was laid in her heart to give to me.
I remembered when the Pastor was screaming at the top of his voice, it almost busted the sound speakers, “this exchange of gift, give your partner a very tangible gift so the Lord will enrich you,” He said. “Is all this the tangible things he meant,” I wondered to myself. Is N100 recharge card tangible. The man I gave 5 yards of Ankara cloths and N500. He gave me 3 N50 Noodles. As if I was so hungry. I wanted to give it back to him to go give his 3 year old daughter that looked malnourished. The noodles would be good for her. Well, I encouraged myself. I have been magad and mugurized.
3 months later this beautiful Sunday. The pastor said the coming Sunday would be another exchange of gift. Immediately he announced it, you need to see how his wife and other church members shouted and clapped. Before he could finish the statement, “Chose a partner,” all the ushers don already hold my hand. I had already seen sister esther coming forward to me. One of the teachers in the children department and many church members had already started screaming my name. Everyone want to partner with me. Before I knew what was happening, almost all the whole church members became my partners. Shey na only me dey the church? The pastor noticed everyone was running to me. Himself come dey wonder wetin dey happen. Am a nice guy and I don’t just give ordinary gifts.
The next Sunday came. I made sure I did what I did very well. After the church service, all the church members began to follow me. Well, I took them to my car to give them what I brought. Na so I chattered plenty biro. My boss had earlier given a contractor a job to produce a customized biro for our company. It we shared the biros in one secondary school in Portharcort. The leftover was what I brought to the church and gave to my partners
When I gave one of the biro to my Pastor’s wife, she asked why I brought her just an ordinary biro. I told her, that was what was laid in my heart to give. I gave the teacher in the children department 2 packets of cabin biscuit for the children. And I gave the other members my customized special biro.
By the next exchange of gift. The pastor screamed, “Go and look for a partner.” Nobody wants to hold or take me as a partner.

http://www.hovabuzz.com/frontline/950-the-gift-i-gave-to-my-pastor-s-wife-and-others-at-the-last-exchange-of-gift

15 Likes

Re: Did I Do Anything Wrong With The Gift I Gave To My Pastor's Wife? by DonaldGenes(m): 11:42am On Feb 16, 2015
Gosh! more like an Romantic epistle to me

I think the pastor's wife is being ungrateful and maybe she might have thought he should have monetized the gift of biro, but you can't blame her, that's how people react


iDoubt iHave such luxury of time reading it


Op, next time try and cut to the case by summarising it

Thumps up Anyway
Re: Did I Do Anything Wrong With The Gift I Gave To My Pastor's Wife? by Kx: 11:45am On Feb 16, 2015
Even in WAEC exams, it is called Summary and Comprehension meaning summarize for your readers to comprehend.
Re: Did I Do Anything Wrong With The Gift I Gave To My Pastor's Wife? by Nobody: 11:53am On Feb 16, 2015
cheesy LolzZz... NIce...

1 Like

Re: Did I Do Anything Wrong With The Gift I Gave To My Pastor's Wife? by demelza: 12:03pm On Feb 16, 2015
Funny story. grin
Thank God say you wise up.

1 Like

Re: Did I Do Anything Wrong With The Gift I Gave To My Pastor's Wife? by passionate88: 12:33pm On Feb 16, 2015
Nice story

1 Like

Re: Did I Do Anything Wrong With The Gift I Gave To My Pastor's Wife? by Chubbiehills(f): 12:38pm On Feb 16, 2015
funny story..if it was me..i would av given them invitation to my house for the pen...

4 Likes

Re: Did I Do Anything Wrong With The Gift I Gave To My Pastor's Wife? by Thanos(m): 12:42pm On Feb 16, 2015
I didn't read that essay. But here's a smiley fire all your troubles grin

2 Likes

Re: Did I Do Anything Wrong With The Gift I Gave To My Pastor's Wife? by Qmab: 2:13pm On Feb 16, 2015
Nice write up. But seriously, r u dt rich and gullible?

1 Like

Re: Did I Do Anything Wrong With The Gift I Gave To My Pastor's Wife? by sucreblazing(m): 2:46pm On Feb 16, 2015
Chubbiehills:
funny story..if it was me..i would av given them invitation to my house for the pen...




u wan take style wicked ooo
Re: Did I Do Anything Wrong With The Gift I Gave To My Pastor's Wife? by derrick333(m): 2:47pm On Feb 16, 2015
Oga Titus ,ehen!! U 2 de lie ehen!! Dis oga Titus,ehen!! U2 de lie,
Lemme gt my googles ,c story !!
Re: Did I Do Anything Wrong With The Gift I Gave To My Pastor's Wife? by Sparkles003(f): 3:40pm On Feb 16, 2015
hahah grin ahaha grin grin
Re: Did I Do Anything Wrong With The Gift I Gave To My Pastor's Wife? by akinsadeez(m): 3:58pm On Feb 16, 2015
Can't believe I read thru it all. very funny and interesting story. grin grin grin

If you can edit your story well, you will make a good writer.

2 Likes

Re: Did I Do Anything Wrong With The Gift I Gave To My Pastor's Wife? by Gmajor(m): 7:28pm On Feb 16, 2015
akinsadeez:
Can't believe I read thru it all. very funny and interesting story. grin grin grin

If you can edit your story well, you will make a good writer.
funny ko intresting ni. Seems we were reading Two different stories
Re: Did I Do Anything Wrong With The Gift I Gave To My Pastor's Wife? by Nobody: 7:35pm On Feb 16, 2015
Very funny I couldn't stop laughing
Re: Did I Do Anything Wrong With The Gift I Gave To My Pastor's Wife? by akinsadeez(m): 7:41pm On Feb 16, 2015
Gmajor:

funny ko intresting ni. Seems we were reading Two different stories

Read all d oda comments. You are d only one not to have found it funny
I think you need to buy a sense of humor. grin grin grin
Re: Did I Do Anything Wrong With The Gift I Gave To My Pastor's Wife? by Nobody: 8:01pm On Feb 16, 2015
So funny grin

nice storycheesy























I just read the comments tho
Re: Did I Do Anything Wrong With The Gift I Gave To My Pastor's Wife? by Nobody: 9:07pm On Feb 16, 2015
Lol...Mehn all these micro churches ehhh... Y on earth would a girl give me toilet roll as gift, she dey madt

1 Like

Re: Did I Do Anything Wrong With The Gift I Gave To My Pastor's Wife? by Ariyke: 9:23pm On Feb 16, 2015
cheesy cheesy cheesy cheesy funny
Re: Did I Do Anything Wrong With The Gift I Gave To My Pastor's Wife? by dareyking(m): 11:43pm On Feb 16, 2015
.
Re: Did I Do Anything Wrong With The Gift I Gave To My Pastor's Wife? by Chidonc(m): 12:05am On Feb 17, 2015
Lol, dis one pass comedy oh
Re: Did I Do Anything Wrong With The Gift I Gave To My Pastor's Wife? by Apina(m): 12:23am On Feb 17, 2015
Chubbiehills:
funny story..if it was me..i would av given them invitation to my house for the pen...
WICKED!!!
Re: Did I Do Anything Wrong With The Gift I Gave To My Pastor's Wife? by happyjuliet(f): 8:27am On Feb 17, 2015
Hahahahahahahahaha So funny, tank God say ur eyes open grin cheesy.
Re: Did I Do Anything Wrong With The Gift I Gave To My Pastor's Wife? by arimahoseloka(m): 11:55am On Feb 17, 2015
nice story, Nigerians ehh... always forming sense
Re: Did I Do Anything Wrong With The Gift I Gave To My Pastor's Wife? by omokoladele(m): 2:05pm On Feb 17, 2015
Even sister Esther too??
I wonder watin u wan use the toilet-roll for grin
Re: Did I Do Anything Wrong With The Gift I Gave To My Pastor's Wife? by cheeketo(f): 4:05pm On Feb 17, 2015
Chubbiehills:
funny story..if it was me..i would av given them invitation to my house for the pen...
bad girl, let them spend transport money to collect just pen
Re: Did I Do Anything Wrong With The Gift I Gave To My Pastor's Wife? by Nobody: 4:43pm On Feb 17, 2015
nice thread.
Re: Did I Do Anything Wrong With The Gift I Gave To My Pastor's Wife? by Benita4bliss(f): 4:54pm On Feb 17, 2015
grin grin grin grin grin grin grin! this joke sweet o! no be small,
Re: Did I Do Anything Wrong With The Gift I Gave To My Pastor's Wife? by tpacalipse(m): 5:09pm On Feb 17, 2015
Nice.
Re: Did I Do Anything Wrong With The Gift I Gave To My Pastor's Wife? by tammyboy1(m): 6:13pm On Feb 17, 2015
I actually read ds shii,lol,very funny tho,sister esther and the toilet roll,omo u bad oh,y u come they distribute biro for ya shursh members,are they students?
Re: Did I Do Anything Wrong With The Gift I Gave To My Pastor's Wife? by Chubbiehills(f): 12:03am On Feb 18, 2015
sucreblazing:

u wan take style wicked ooo
cheeketo:

bad girl, let them spend transport money to collect just pen
Apina:

WICKED!!!
i am not..dt was just a laid principle...
Re: Did I Do Anything Wrong With The Gift I Gave To My Pastor's Wife? by Apina(m): 1:17pm On Feb 18, 2015
Chubbiehills:

i am not..dt was just a laid principle...
Am NT saying u are as a person simply making reference to ur comment

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