Welcome, Guest: Register On Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / New
Stats: 3,195,373 members, 7,958,037 topics. Date: Wednesday, 25 September 2024 at 07:49 AM

How Do I Deal With His Friends And Not Hurt His Feelings? - Romance - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / How Do I Deal With His Friends And Not Hurt His Feelings? (1358 Views)

OMG: See What This Guy Does To Hurt His Ex Girlfriend / How Do I Deal With This Type Of Girl? / Urgent:how Do You Answer The Question "What R We Into" And Not Hurt Her Feelings (2) (3) (4)

(1) (Reply) (Go Down)

How Do I Deal With His Friends And Not Hurt His Feelings? by Twaci(f): 7:04pm On Mar 09, 2015
I have got this friend, Tina (not her real name) who is engaged to the guy of her dreams (Chris). She loves him, so does he....so no wahala there.

The issue she has is Chris' friends. "Bunch of rowdy fellows", she calls them. "They come into our home like its theirs! Eat our food, leave a mess, and walk out as if its nothing! Some even have the nerve to criticize the way I keep my home!"

And as for Chris? She says, "He simply doesn't get it. In fact, whenever he and I have issues, instead of sorting it out with me, he bring them all in! And of course, they would support him and cast figurative stones at me."

She loves Chris very much and doesn't want to leave him (so she says), but can't tolerate his friends any longer. How can she tackle this without looking like the-evil-girlfriend?

Your advice is needed romancelanders.
Re: How Do I Deal With His Friends And Not Hurt His Feelings? by Cutehector(m): 7:06pm On Mar 09, 2015
Has she talked to him abt it in private?
Re: How Do I Deal With His Friends And Not Hurt His Feelings? by raziboi(m): 7:10pm On Mar 09, 2015
dialogue.....



try dialogue!!!
Re: How Do I Deal With His Friends And Not Hurt His Feelings? by Dioxidane: 7:11pm On Mar 09, 2015
She loves him #fact. But does he REALLY love her. If he does, she should sincerely talk to him about it and I'm sure it would be resolved.
Re: How Do I Deal With His Friends And Not Hurt His Feelings? by Princecalm(m): 7:12pm On Mar 09, 2015
Why has she not told chris, this is how some people suffer emotionally because of some sort of love which i don't understand.
Re: How Do I Deal With His Friends And Not Hurt His Feelings? by Slimzjoe(m): 7:15pm On Mar 09, 2015
Its Easy Na....

Use Style Style and Pidgin English Take Yarn Them Your Mind grin

The Guyz would Understand
Re: How Do I Deal With His Friends And Not Hurt His Feelings? by Nobody: 7:18pm On Mar 09, 2015
She has no rights no make any demands. She's just a girlfriend. That place is her house, not her home.

When she's legally married, she has a point. The guy -while not abandoning his friends because of his wife - should realize that she now comes first in his life and if she is not happy, he won't be happy.

As long as she is a girlfriend, she can't do _shit. She disrespects herself by cohabiting and forming wife when nothing concrete has been done to solidify their union. . . The guy can as well walk out one day and get another girl and then his friends would laugh at her and call her a fool.

For now, she's just a domestic appendage. If she cannot tolerate his friends at this stage, she should respect herself and move out.

2 Likes

Re: How Do I Deal With His Friends And Not Hurt His Feelings? by Twaci(f): 7:21pm On Mar 09, 2015
Cutehector:
Has she talked to him abt it in private?
Princecalm:
Why has she not told chris, this is how some people suffer emotionally because of some sort of love which i don't understand.
raziboi:
dialogue.....
try dialogue!!!
Dioxidane:
She loves him #fact. But does he REALLY love her. If he does, she should sincerely talk to him about it and I'm sure it would be resolved.

She said the day she'd brought it up, dude waved it aside and told her to overlook them. That they were his "paddies" and wouldn't just bring up problems because of her "childish and jealous" feelings.....
Re: How Do I Deal With His Friends And Not Hurt His Feelings? by adanduka: 7:23pm On Mar 09, 2015
Talk to him and let him talk to his friends. I love guys that have friends. It speaks volumes. It shows to some extent that they've got nothing to hide. An open and friendly man.
BTW, if you're dating a guy who has no friends, it's not a good sign.
Re: How Do I Deal With His Friends And Not Hurt His Feelings? by Cutehector(m): 7:25pm On Mar 09, 2015
Twaci:





She said the day she'd brought it up, dude waved it aside and told her to overlook them. That they were his "paddies" and wouldn't just bring up problems because of her "childish and jealous" feelings.....
well its her problem, she should either deal wit them or threaten to break up if he doesn't wana caution dem.
Re: How Do I Deal With His Friends And Not Hurt His Feelings? by Dioxidane: 7:27pm On Mar 09, 2015
Twaci:





She said the day she'd brought it up, dude waved it aside and told her to overlook them. That they were his "paddies" and wouldn't just bring up problems because of her "childish and jealous" feelings.....

Then she should just be patient and see how things work out while SUBTLY showing her guy how unhappy she is with the situation. Trust me, no guy that really loves his girl would want to do anything to make her unhappy, even if it's 'cos of his besties...
Re: How Do I Deal With His Friends And Not Hurt His Feelings? by Nobody: 7:29pm On Mar 09, 2015
So lemmee get this straight: she stays in his house?
Cooks and cleans for him?
And she's just a girlfriend?

Is she fvcking sane? undecided

If he belittles what she feels, she should walk out.
She might as well be his house girl.

Tch.

1 Like

Re: How Do I Deal With His Friends And Not Hurt His Feelings? by iceberylin(m): 7:33pm On Mar 09, 2015
Story for the Gods undecided
Re: How Do I Deal With His Friends And Not Hurt His Feelings? by Tymax(m): 7:34pm On Mar 09, 2015
I don't need to think twice before I recognise exaggeration.

Abeg make she go sleep. She just classified all his friends as irresponsible. Ahn ahn! Na wa o.
Re: How Do I Deal With His Friends And Not Hurt His Feelings? by spacefreak: 7:40pm On Mar 09, 2015
A man is nothing without his friends ( true friends ). Chris may have even known the friends long before her and they have been through shii together.

Your friend should learn to tolerate them unless she is the one putting the food on the table and paying the bills. I believe things would change maybe after she stops being a fiancée and turn to a wife with a kid or two.
Re: How Do I Deal With His Friends And Not Hurt His Feelings? by zyzxx(m): 7:40pm On Mar 09, 2015
d guy av to talk to his freinds
Re: How Do I Deal With His Friends And Not Hurt His Feelings? by TrishaP(f): 7:47pm On Mar 09, 2015
It's up to the guy to talk to his friends if he really loves and wants their marriage to be to last. I'm sure those crazy friends are just showing themselves to see her reaction. She should try to talk him to see reasons with her, put him in her shoes too.
Re: How Do I Deal With His Friends And Not Hurt His Feelings? by Pimples(m): 8:08pm On Mar 09, 2015
when you love.... you've got to love completely
how can u claim to love a man and not love his friends.
imagine referring to them as" "Bunch of
rowdy fellows",
na wa for girls that think they can control a man
Re: How Do I Deal With His Friends And Not Hurt His Feelings? by baralatie(m): 8:40pm On Mar 09, 2015
Twaci:
I have got this friend, Tina (not her real name) who is engaged to the guy of her dreams (Chris). She loves him, so does he....so no wahala there.

The issue she has is Chris' friends. "Bunch of rowdy fellows", she calls them. "They come into our home like its theirs! Eat our food, leave a mess, and walk out as if its nothing! Some even have the nerve to criticize the way I keep my home!"

And as for Chris? She says, "He simply doesn't get it. In fact, whenever he and I have issues, instead of sorting it out with me, he bring them all in! And of course, they would support him and cast figurative stones at me."

She loves Chris very much and doesn't want to leave him (so she says), but can't tolerate his friends any longer. How can she tackle this without looking like the-evil-girlfriend?

Your advice is needed romancelanders.
can she tell Mr Chris & co. bye bye!it will save insult!

1 Like

Re: How Do I Deal With His Friends And Not Hurt His Feelings? by kinglekan: 9:12pm On Mar 09, 2015
Twaci:
I have got this friend, Tina (not her real name) who is engaged to the guy of her dreams (Chris). She loves him, so does he....so no wahala there.

The issue she has is Chris' friends. "Bunch of rowdy fellows", she calls them. "They come into our home like its theirs! Eat our food, leave a mess, and walk out as if its nothing! Some even have the nerve to criticize the way I keep my home!"

And as for Chris? She says, "He simply doesn't get it. In fact, whenever he and I have issues, instead of sorting it out with me, he bring them all in! And of course, they would support him and cast figurative stones at me."

She loves Chris very much and doesn't want to leave him (so she says), but can't tolerate his friends any longer. How can she tackle this without looking like the-evil-girlfriend?

Your advice is needed romancelanders.

Hmmmm tough one oooo.

Well like the proverbial saying show me your friends and I would tell you who you are. I think she has to come to terms with the fact that things might really not change especially if they are his long time friends.

But not to sound as though all hope is lost. Ist thing she should do is look for a good time to talk. This means if she has been studying him she should know when he is happy and would gladly listen to what she has to say.

Another important thing is this. She should be carefull of her choice of words so as not to sound too critical of his friends. She should calmly talk about the things they do she doesn't like and communicate that without any form of hurtful remarks.
Re: How Do I Deal With His Friends And Not Hurt His Feelings? by kinglekan: 9:14pm On Mar 09, 2015
Blackett:
She has no rights no make any demands. She's just a girlfriend. That place is her house, not her home.

When she's legally married, she has a point. The guy -while not abandoning his friends because of his wife - should realize that she now comes first in his life and if she is not happy, he won't be happy.

As long as she is a girlfriend, she can't do _shit. She disrespects herself by cohabiting and forming wife when nothing concrete has been done to solidify their union. . . The guy can as well walk out one day and get another girl and then his friends would laugh at her and call her a fool.

For now, she's just a domestic appendage. If she cannot tolerate his friends at this stage, she should respect herself and move out.

Well said bro!!!
Re: How Do I Deal With His Friends And Not Hurt His Feelings? by Princecalm(m): 9:27pm On Mar 09, 2015
Twaci:





She said the day she'd brought it up, dude waved it aside and told her to overlook them. That they were his "paddies" and wouldn't just bring up problems because of her "childish and jealous" feelings.....
then they don't really understand themselves.
Re: How Do I Deal With His Friends And Not Hurt His Feelings? by Vision4God: 9:49pm On Mar 09, 2015
Twaci, ur friend shud address d issue now b4 de get married. Or else sge wud hv herself 2 blame.
Chris owes her d duty 2 protect her.
Also let her not 4get 2pray bout it.

1 Like

Re: How Do I Deal With His Friends And Not Hurt His Feelings? by O4A3EM(f): 10:54pm On Mar 24, 2015
Twaci:
I have got this friend, Tina (not her real name) who is engaged to the guy of her dreams (Chris). She loves him, so does he....so no wahala there.

The issue she has is Chris' friends. "Bunch of rowdy fellows", she calls them. "They come into our home like its theirs! Eat our food, leave a mess, and walk out as if its nothing! Some even have the nerve to criticize the way I keep my home!"

And as for Chris? She says, "He simply doesn't get it. In fact, whenever he and I have issues, instead of sorting it out with me, he bring them all in! And of course, they would support him and cast figurative stones at me."

She loves Chris very much and doesn't want to leave him (so she says), but can't tolerate his friends any longer. How can she tackle this without looking like the-evil-girlfriend?

Your advice is needed romancelanders.

she should make him help her in cleaning up, next time he'll call his friends to do d same when they ask abt her, he'll be like is she your maid?

1 Like 1 Share

(1) (Reply)

Who Supports This Opinion? / Your Idea Of A Perfect Woman / THE WONDERS OF Jealousy(in A Relationship).

(Go Up)

Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health
religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket

Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10)

Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 45
Disclaimer: Every Nairaland member is solely responsible for anything that he/she posts or uploads on Nairaland.