How should I go about it?
Anytime my fiancee come to my house, she always call my younger brothers with their name. My mum called me yesterday that I should rebuke it from her calling my younger brothers with their names even my younger ones of my family members.
She (My mum) said she (My fiancee) should be calling them Brother ................... or look for a pet name to be calling them. She really got angry with her yesterday. She now told me that if she doesnt change, she will tell her not to come to my house again.
I love my fiancee likewise my mum too and I can't afford to lose my wife to be.
NB: I'm still leaving under the roof of my parent.

Ur mum sef!!!! She is really gona be a very wicked mother in law! Wat other name is she suposed to call ur younger brothers? Sweetie, honey? Baybee? Eh..

It even seems like ur a momma's boy...

Yoruba culture... As if u r doing them a big favor by coming in..

They would call u uncle, e kpele Sir, daddy toyin, and all sorts and still give u d YINMU of the century.

Cutehector:
Ur mum sef!!!! She is really gona be a very wicked mother in law! Wat other name is she suposed to call ur younger brothers? Sweetie, honey? Baybee? Eh..

It even seems like ur a momma's boy...

My mum said she should add brother as prefix to their name or look for a pet name.
What can be done before it get out of hand?

Tell her what ur culture demands in a loving way for peace to reign, you didn't say if you are both from the same place but if not explain to her very well if not you are on a long thing

As long as u'r still under ur parent "This is just the begining" btw u have mind oo, talking about fiancee why u'r still sucking breast. Some guys sha

abdrazak:

My mum said she should add brother as prefix to their name or look for a pet name.
What can be done before it get out of hand?

for christ sake she is goin to be their sister in law! Not their little niece! Abdrazak, I want to believe you r very very matured.. Hw u go allow ur mum to dey fvckup like this na? Ok leme ask, does ur immediate younger brother call u brother abdrazak wen he wants to call u?

@op: The ball is in your court, so tell us what you want. Do you want your wife to stop calling your younger brothers by name?? If yes, then tell her exactly what you and your family have agreed upon. If No, tell your mother and your younger brothers your decision.

BTW, I'm almost certain you're trolling but I'll take the bait.

Lol, pls, what's she supposed to call ur younger siblings? Uncle/Aunty? Your mum just wants to make an issue out of nothing. but wait o hw does a man planning to get married still be living under his parents roof? that's fooked up

I am sure the OP is Yoruba. That isn't a big deal. Just tell her that your culture frowns at it and all will be well. Respect is reciprocal.

Mtchew

rawtouch:
Tell her what ur culture demands in a loving way for peace to reign, you didn't say if you are both from the same place but if not explain to her very well if not you are on a long thing

we are from the same place

And if you refused to marry her in the future what would she be calling them?

missbehave247:
As long as u'r still under ur parent "This is just the begining" btw u have mind oo, talking about fiancee why u'r still sucking breast. Some guys sha

Mind you, I'm a graduate and I know my age.
My father is late and I'm the first son. So I staying at my father's house fo a while to be with my mum

Just call your girl and tell her. If she loves you, she will adjust.

She can use words like chairman, madam, prof

It's a Yoruba culture and I think it's just to promote respect amongst both families just like they do in churches where everybody uses the words "brother", "sister", "yes ma", "yes sir". But I don't think all that is necessary for us to respect ourselves. Anybody who's naturally haughty and disrespectful will always show such tendencies even if mandated to say those words. In my opinion, if both of you love each other, you can talk it over and let her understand that it is basically culture-just for peace to reign. But seriously, it's not necessary as long as she accords every member of your family respect and you also do same.

Cutehector:
for christ sake she is goin to be their sister in law! Not their little niece! Abdrazak, I want to believe you r very very matured.. Hw u go allow ur mum to dey fvckup like this na? Ok leme ask, does ur immediate younger brother call u brother abdrazak wen he wants to call u?

Yes now. He is last born of my mum. He is closing to 20yrs.
I was shocked too when my mum told me.

abdrazak:

we are from the same place

That's good-it makes the job easier. Tell her she can also confirm this from her own parents or you can discuss with her parents about the issue. I'm sure they will share the same view with your mother and advise your fiancee accordingly. This to me is a simple issue.

abdrazak:

Yes now. He is last born of my mum. He is closing to 20yrs.
I was shocked too when my mum told me.

and how old is ur fiancee?

Hmm

The fact that you are a graduate, make things more complicated.

Don't you think that as a graduate u'r been unfair to her yet u claim to love her

How will u react, if another man dose this to ur sister, and that your sister seems to be ur elder sis?

Note:- not my business duo
Or are you trying to claim your family house as the first son "in this modern days"

abdrazak:

Mind you, I'm a graduate and I know my age.
My father is late and I'm the first son. So I staying at my father's house fo a while to be with my mum

Shollypopzz:
@op: The ball is in your court, so tell us what you want. Do you want your wife to stop calling your younger brothers by name?? If yes, then tell her exactly what you and your family have agreed upon. If No, tell your mother and your younger brothers your decision.

BTW, I'm almost certain you're trolling but I'll take the bait.

Should I take a decision first or talk to my fiancee about it?

Charliiee:
Lol, pls, what's she supposed to call ur younger siblings? Uncle/Aunty? Your mum just wants to make an issue out of nothing. but wait o hw does a man planning to get married still be living under his parents roof? that's fooked up

I'm the first one having two elder sisters which they have got married.
I too know what I should do but not yet time.

nerodenero:
I am sure the OP is Yoruba. That isn't a big deal. Just tell her that your culture frowns at it and all will be well. Respect is reciprocal.

I am and likewise she too

Beesluv:
Just call your girl and tell her. If she loves you, she will adjust.

She can use words like chairman, madam, prof

Thanks beesluv

abdrazak:

Mind you, I'm a graduate and I know my age.
My father is late and I'm the first son. So I staying at my father's house fo a while to be with my mum

Are ur younger brothers not there for her? Stop giving excuses and be a man! Tell ur fiancee to start adding 'brother' b4 calling ur bros or tell ur mom she cant be calling them like that or better still move out to ur own place.

3ace:
It's a Yoruba culture and I think it's just to promote respect amongst both families just like they do in churches where everybody uses the words "brother", "sister", "yes ma", "yes sir". But I don't think all that is necessary for us to respect ourselves. Anybody who's naturally haughty and disrespectful will always show such tendencies even if mandated to say those words. In my opinion, if both of you love each other, you can talk it over and let her understand that it is basically culture-just for peace to reign. But seriously, it's not necessary as long as she accords every member of your family respect and you also do same.

thumbs up 3ace

3ace:
It's a Yoruba culture and I think it's just to promote respect amongst both families just like they do in churches where everybody uses the words "brother", "sister", "yes ma", "yes sir". But I don't think all that is necessary for us to respect ourselves. Anybody who's naturally haughty and disrespectful will always show such tendencies even if mandated to say those words. In my opinion, if both of you love each other, you can talk it over and let her understand that it is basically culture-just for peace to reign. But seriously, it's not necessary as long as she accords every member of your family respect and you also do same.

Cosigned

abdrazak:
thumbs up 3ace

You're welcome, goodluck.

[b]you didnt tell us how old is your fiancee! That would give us an insight of handdling this issue! Ofcourse it would be out of place to include prefix like brother or uncle or whatever your mum wants her to attach to their names if she's way older than them. We are talking of your younger kids here! Not elder brothers!! between, get out of your father's house if you want all this bullshit to stop! Else, you would experience more insult and hardship from your family members. I believe if you had rented an apartment, all this bullshit wouldnt have happened. I believe one of your younger brother may have raised this issue before your mum before she took it up! This is one reason you shouldnt even think of going into any serious relationship with a girl if you dont have an apartment. Find a way and leave your father's house! Even if you're the first son! You get more respect!! Most of my yoruba friends are just like that! They take advantage of their position in the family as first son to permanently remain in their father's house just to Inherit the property! This is more reason why majority of them are quite lazy to find something meaningful to do!! I also heard most of the marriage rights sef is largely sponsored by groom's parents![/b]

abdrazak:
How should I go about it?
Anytime my fiancee come to my house, she always call my younger brothers with their name. My mum called me yesterday that I should rebuke it from her calling my younger brothers with their names even my younger ones of my family members.
She (My mum) said she (My fiancee) should be calling them Brother ................... or look for a pet name to be calling them. She really got angry with her yesterday. She now told me that if she doesnt change, she will tell her not to come to my house again.
I love my fiancee likewise my mum too and I can't afford to lose my wife to be.
NB: I'm still leaving under the roof of my parent.

abdrazak:
How should I go about it?
Anytime my fiancee come to my house, she always call my younger brothers with their name. My mum called me yesterday that I should rebuke it from her calling my younger brothers with their names even my younger ones of my family members.
She (My mum) said she (My fiancee) should be calling them Brother ................... or look for a pet name to be calling them. She really got angry with her yesterday. She now told me that if she doesnt change, she will tell her not to come to my house again.
I love my fiancee likewise my mum too and I can't afford to lose my wife to be.
NB: I'm still leaving under the roof of my parent.

Is your brothers name brother? Or is your wife secretly related to you and him? And by the way why is your mum still giving you instructions on how to handle a woman you want to marry? Unfortunately it seems your mum is a village woman who still believes in archaic and senseless customs and traditions that do nothing for society so you are stuck with that problem for the time being! Listening to her sometimes" _stupid advice" should be at your own risk! As for you, I think you need to grow some balls in addition to a backbone and stop making a mockery of your educational background and men in general! A name is a name not a title! Even if your brothers name is "busta rhymes ebele toyota beyonce", then that is WHAT THE _FUCK your wife should always call him! Nonsense!

This supposed culture is very annoying to say the least, why do they name people if they can't be called by their names? Or does it apply only to wives?

How can you even be engaged and still live with your parents? Is that where ya'll will stay after wedding? Not that it's a crime but it just isn't always the best idea.

abdrazak:

we are from the same place

Then she should know better than to behave Behind in front of your family, you will have to tell her calmly you noticed something in the way she relates with your younger ones and the cultural angle to it all because no matter what the level of education is CULTURE and TRADITION supersedes it