It’s general knowledge that a man would first
look at the physical attributes of a woman
before finding out her inner qualities.
While this is okay, these men in the long run
realise what they want because beauty doesn’t
cover everything.
One advice for the ladies: If a man is unable to
tell you why he wants to be with you or has
trouble pulling out a couple of specific character
qualities that makes you special to him then it’s
an issue. You need to bolt.
Courtnye of Blogher lists specific traits a man
should be able to see in the woman he loves
besides her beauty:

1. Your value: Regardless of whether you’re
dating, courting, engaged or married your
significant other should be able to clearly
recognize the value that you bring to his life.
Throughout proverbs, wisdom is characterized
as a female and in Proverbs 31 we see what
makes up an excellent woman or wife. In the
bible it states that a man who seeks wisdom
will be blessed, just as a man who finds a wife
is blessed. It also states that wise words and
wisdom are more valuable than rubies, just as a
woman of noble character is more precious than
rubies. I say this to make the comparison to
the value of wisdom and that of a noble wife.
The word wisdom appears in the bible over 200
times and we are told in Proverbs 4 that
obtaining wisdom is a principal thing; And
although the bible is speaking of wisdom,
verses 6-9 could seriously read as a guide-book
for having a very happy wife and hence life. If
there are so many similarities between the
attainment of wisdom with all its importance
and that of the rare and noble wife then it is
fair to say that you are quite valuable in God’s
eyes and should be in your significant other’s as
well. In 1 Peter 3:7 husbands are told to live
with your wives in an understanding way,
showing honor to the woman as the weaker
vessel, since they are heirs with you of the
grace of life, so that your prayers may not be
hindered. If a man does not show
understanding and honor to his wife his prayers
could be hindered. Meaning the way a man
treats his wife is directly correlated to the way
God treats his prayers! That’s just how serious
God is about the treatment of his daughters by
their husbands and truly shows the value of a
virtuous woman.

2. Your Irreplaceableness: In the middle of an
argument, I had an ex-boyfriend tell me that he
could go out tomorrow and find another ‘good
girl’ just like me. Aside from the fact that he
called me a girl, the comment made me cringe
because I felt like after all the time of us dating
my worth to him boiled down to the fact that I
had a steady job, was smart and pretty. Like he
could just go to the girlfriend store and tell the
manager ‘this one didn’t fit I need another one
of the same model’. His statement didn’t
encompa$$ any of the attributes that made me
who I was internally, it didn’t entertain the
uniqueness of my laugh, my penchant for
singing loudly off-key in the shower or my quirky
sense of humor, it only focused on the external
which in essence could actually be easily
replaced. Thank God for instilling me with
enough confidence to know that although he
may find someone else quickly, there was no
way on God’s green earth he would run across
another me. If you look at the beginning of
Proverbs 31:10, it begins with a question, ‘Who
can find a virtuous woman?’ Since it’s in
question form I immediately think that maybe
this virtuous woman isn’t so easily found and
while there are many, many women in the world
to choose from, this particular woman is
actually quite rare. We all have qualities that
make us irreplaceable to that special someone
and if we model ourselves after virtuous women
in the bible we become the one in a million that
God so highly speaks of. If your significant
other is unable to see how irreplaceable you are
maybe you need to take a trip to the boyfriend
store and get an upgrade!

3. Your equality: Granted, men and women have
very different roles within the boundaries of
marriage, the fact that the wife chooses to
submit to her husband as the head in marriage
does not make her input, opinions or
suggestions any less valuable or her role any
less important. In the bible it states that
women are the weaker vessels, but it also
states that the men are to honor her as a result
of it. Women are afforded the same salvation,
grace, forgiveness and love promised to men.
Galatians 3:28 puts it this way: There is neither
Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free,
there is no male and female, for you are all one
in Christ Jesus.

4. Your intelligence: I suppose one out of three
isn’t bad in Franco’s defense as brains was one
of his three B’s, but a man should love your
brain long before he’s made love to your body.
Dating without fornication is a great time to get
to know someone without the would be
distractions of physical $ex. I regret the fact
that I delved into $exual relationships with
boyfriends in the past because it got in the way
of us getting to truly know each other at times.
Hopefully, your mate enjoys having
conversations with you, hearing your points of
view and heeding your advice if it be wise.
Speaking from experience, if you have a long-
term mate that is constantly dismissive of your
views or rarely seeks your advice on pertinent
issues in his life you may have a long, hard road
ahead, especially if you decide to marry him. In
Proverbs 31 we see that the virtuous woman
speaks with wisdom, she is hard-working and
doesn’t worry during seasons of winter because
she was smart enough to prepare ahead of
time. I can bet she was one of her husband’s
main confidants and counselors as it tells us
that his heart safely trusted in her. So release
your inner nerd and let your geek flag fly, the
man meant for you will only love you all the
more for it!

5. Your God: A man who knows you, should be
able to see the God in you through your daily
interactions together and optimally, in turn, will
encourage growth in your relationship with God.
It could become extremely problematic if you set
your standards as a child of God and he
continually attempts to cross those
boundaries. If he constantly tries to get you
into bed, take things further than you would like,
speaks to you in a mean, harsh or vulgar way,
disrespects you or treats you anything less than
a lady he definitely doesn’t recognize or at the
most respect the God within you.

Beauty is in d eyes of d beholder

ok

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