freecocoa:
If you agree we can make new rules, let's stick with that.

I would never argue on the figures because you are very correct even though you exaggerated but still, now why is this so is a question one would ask? Yes the men should be blamed to an extent because they set the tone for it,

like you'll argue that it's not always been a man's world? Care to explain what that even means? Just incase I have a wrong idea of it.

We take responsibility alright, we just want to make sure those responsibilities are really ours, will I be fighting with my hubby on who should carry the baby in their belly between us? I agree only you can be responsible for your happiness but societal norms say otherwise.

You can't heap the blame of a faulty vehicle on the driver, I agree there are bad drivers alright, I am saying, that a bad vehicle will malfunction, driver or not. You can't blame me for following a shitty rule, the fault is on you for making the rule shitty in the first place.

freecocoa:

Exactly, we frown on/fight against fraud, don't we? if certain rules in a system encourages fraud, we make new rules.

Again, it is not marriage that I find faulty, it is the roles, just like manufacturers will throw out an irreparable part, bringing in an entirely new one, so should some new rules be made, is all I'm saying, may have been deliberate, may not have been, but from the look of things, it tilts more on the deliberate side.

EnlightenedSoul:


Lol. It's already been said. Don't create a circle now - I'll have you know I'm not too fond of circles. G'day!

freecocoa:
Okay then but it's like you missed my point, it being that, the beliefs being indoctrinated is the problem, how then can it be the process if the idea to be indoctrinated is not so great in itself?

Reinventing the wheel to bring a balance, will bring balance. The wheel was originally designed to be unbalanced, there's no way the operator could've operated it to function in a balanced state.

freecocoa:


You'll also have to deal with my not agreeing with that, whether you like it or not. Btw, you seem not to understand that it's no longer about what he wants, if he's compromising in the first place, how is his wants important?

crackhaus:

What's the fraud in a woman cooking her husband's meals?
Is everything a competition with you people?
And by you people I mean, feminists and pseudo-feminists, as the case may be..


Ermmm, since you're going to use the manufacturers' analogy - I should let you know that when an irreparable part is thrown out, it is replaced with another part that serves the same function.
Hence, nothing actually changes and no new rules have been made neither have any roles being changed in the end - I mean, if a faulty gear-box is thrown out and then replaced with an oil filter, I'm pretty sure the car's caput. Get it?

It is marriage you find faulty Cocoa, admit it..

Timbuktou:


Don't worry about my internet charges, ma'am. I can type unlimited words at very little cost. However, I'll have you know, I, myself, am a hole person. Ciao.

EnlightenedSoul:


Well, I was worried less about cost, and more about time, practicality, and unnecessary circling. If you didn't notice, we are all of us on this green earth - and without exception - hole people in one way or the other. It could be said that it's one thing in which we are in full and synergistic agreement. Hence, that little 'revelation' would fall under "unnecessary...", really. Au revoir.

Timbuktou:


How about we stick to the roles and rules not needing any change and charge practitioners to perform at the highest level or, at least, attempt to.

Woman, abeg encourage your sister s to take responsibility for their actions. Let all the women of the world boycott marriage and we'll see who loses, meanwhile the "sane/saner/civilised world" that you Nigerian women like referring to as the paradise for women are noticing an increasing male boycott of marriage, and fvck me, the women are the one's complaining about men not wanting anything from them other than sex.
Men are perfectly content with fvcking free pvssy till their dying days. The rape statistics will attest to that. Men didn't set the tone for shitt and are content with facing the consequences of their actions. The fact is that the law of demand and supply applies here: the higher the quantity supplied the lower the value.

It is a man's world because me generally succeed ahead of women at whateve both set out to do. You may argue that but the statistics support it. Men are the movers and shakers. The top and the bottom.

You aren't taking responsibility when you say men are to be blamed to an extent. The point is everybody has fvcked up, take your share let me take my share. Don't be pointing your finger at me when you're not a saint
Nurture na nurture, madam. Men want to marry women with nurturing instincts. Please don't include gays and pansies.

Well, I didn't heap all the blame on bad drivers, hence, my reference at tweaking and recalibration. Yeah, yeah, bad drivers always have someone else to blame for their foibles.

crackhaus:

No you're the one not understanding.

We both agree on compromise, but compromise doesn't equate to taking an express ride down the road of abnormality.
Fine, a man can compromise and cook every once in a while...but expecting that he be doing the cooking every time, all the time, for as long as they both live in sickness and in good health? Come on now, snap back to reality peaches...that is just unimaginable.

A very wise man once said, 'Give a woman an inch, and she'll take a mile'... But some men never listen and think the wise man was just a lonely old sucker smoking weed on top of the mountain all alone.

Timbuktou:


Ah, we are back to the beginning of our impasse. I have no problem with the roles/rules. It's the indoctrination system/process I have a problem with.

The wheel can only be improved upon, and the operator more skilled in operating. Any other thing is a waste of time and resources.

freecocoa:
I don't have a problem with a woman cooking for her man, I cook for my men, so that's not the issue at all. The issue is saying I'm incomplete if I can't cook and he is weak if he does always. You are the ones making it a competition by delegating roles, duh!

The analogy was Tim's doing, I just played.

It is so not, it's the roles I find faulty.

Timbuktou:


Au revoir. Yet you'll come back to respond to me, even though you're concerned with other critical resources.

I wouldn't agree that everyone on earth is a hole person. What about those with other tastes and proclivities? Are they to accept to being hole people just because. Maybe you shouldn't go after all. Maybe you should chill and talk with me.

Timbuktou:


Au revoir. Yet you'll come back to respond to me, even though you're concerned with other critical resources.

I wouldn't agree that everyone on earth is a hole person. What about those with other tastes and proclivities? Are they to accept to being hole people just because. Maybe you shouldn't go after all. Maybe you should chill and talk with me.

freecocoa:
If we continue, it will never end. One person has to back down and lord knows it ain't me, because I'm the one asking for fairness on both sides.

crackhaus:

You're not incomplete if you can't cook, neither is the man weak if he always does (okay maybe he's a little bit of a puzzy though, if his day job isn't being a chef).

The problem is actually you and reflects badly on you, for leaving him to do the cooking all the time while you sit back to watch your favorite soap-opera fantasy.

The man in the OP just wants his wife to at least cook for him sometimes, he might not even need her cooking all the time since he's a pretty good cook himself... Is that too much for a husband to ask from his wife for the love of feminism?

You guys successfully dragged out this argument so long and lost out on what the husband might actually mean from his own perspective.

EnlightenedSoul:


I must say, you're patience is quite admirable, freecocoa.

freecocoa:
How can they perform with inadequate tools eh Tim nwanne'm?

Well, if you can get every woman to know she can be happy without marriage, then you may have a deal, right now, societal norms which is the doing of men has told them otherwise and they believe it, therefore you'll have women wanting marriage.


How is saying men are to be blamed when they really are, not taking responsibility? Just like a woman also does, you think I don't want a man that will cook or bathe the children?

I have told you that a car proven to be malfunctional cannot be the driver's fault, you know this.

freecocoa:
Why is it a bad reflection on me if I sit while he cooks, if that's okay with us and our lifestyle?

No, it can never be asking too much if he understands that he can cook for her if need be, like he wants her to do for him and that is perfectly okay. The problem is with the "I am a man, therefore you must cook" phrase, what has that go to do with anything?

EnlightenedSoul:


Yes, au revoir. But what can I say? You've drawn a circle, and circles are surefire conversational traps if anything else. Hence my confessed hatred of them.

It is as I said. You may as well try to prove otherwise if you like, but you will fail. And as well you know, in doing so you're veering dangerously from the topic at hand, i.e, derailment.

freecocoa:
Lol, if we all have points, it shouldn't be a problem to talk about it logically. That's what communication is all about, after all.

crackhaus:

Lmao...

Why are you people still quoting each other sef after bidding goodbyes?

freecocoa:
If we continue, it will never end. One person has to back down and lord knows it ain't me, because I'm the one asking for fairness on both sides.

Timbuktou:


Or you could avoid the traps altogether, no matter how compelling and inviting they seem. Congrats on your hatreds. They're inconsequential to me. Moving on....

Oh, derailment is going off topic? Who knew? More vocabulary lessons please. You seem proficient enough to be a good tutor.

Timbuktou:

She gets the tingles when I quote her and she responds. So, I'm just providing her with the attention she craves.

EnlightenedSoul:


I do agree, but it's admirable nonetheless being that it seems a common characteristic on here to sooner die than admit to wrong Honestly, I admire you (no homo, lol).

EnlightenedSoul:

Lol. You're a try-hard. And a dreamer.

freecocoa:
Why is it a bad reflection on me if I sit while he cooks, if that's okay with us and our lifestyle?

No it can never be asking too much if he understands that he can cook for her if need be, like he wants her to do for him and that is perfectly okay. The problem is with the "I am a man, therefore you must cook" phrase, what has that go to do with anything?

Timbuktou:


So, I made you laugh, or smile?

Gotta work hard, right?

As a dreamer, I'm essential to the continuance of mankind.

freecocoa:
Lol, thanks babe.

Timbuktou:


Well, they can improve on the tools at their disposition or improve their proficiency at using these skill, can't they?

The oyinbo men boycotting marriage, who told them they could be happy without marriage? Societal norms are also telling them that they are expected to get married; there are hundreds of marriages calling these men all sorts of names from immature, to mentally underdeveloped, to not being real men. But you know what? They have given the mainstream media the collective middle finger . I dare you women to boycott marriage. I dare you all

You think men are to blame, I think both sexes are to blame. Herein, lies another impasse of ours. Hmm, I wonder why women have a reputation for shying away from responsibility. Men know what they bring to the table and what they expect to get. You are at liberty to negotiate that. What you fail to realise is that marriage is largely about negotiation and compromise. You may want things but do you hold enough value to get them? Think about that for a second.

And I have told you that accidents aren't caused by only machine malfunction but also poor driving. You don't know this?

Timbuktou:


It doesn't have to end, does it? Why do you think I want it to end?

Timbuktou:


She gets the tingles when I quote her and she responds. So, I'm just providing her with the attention she craves.