Rukkydelta:
lol

Rukkydelta:
lol

Atmmachine:
No.
It's not wise for a wife to give part of her monthly salary to her husband.

It's also not wise for a husband to give part of his monthly salary to his wife.

God forbids any husband to give money to any woman.

Alezy:
Mavo??

u kw Wht dat means ryt??

PAPIJAID:
Well as a married man, let me speak from my experience. It all depends on who your husband or wife is, for instance me and my wife are employees and we earn salaries but her's is a little bit higher and I as a person don't know how to keep money, honestly I don't because I have tried and failed on several occasions but she on her part is very thrifty and she can keep any amount of money for years, all you need to do is to ask her about the money you gave her to keep for you two years ago and she will bring it out exactly the way you gave it to her, for this reason immediately I get my salary I give everything to her after deductions as regards debts have been removed by the bank (she will even be the on to give me my monthly allowance) and she will add her's and keep, I can tell you this has greatly helped my family, if I should tell you what we have achieved using this method within the little years we get married you will marvel (mind you out of the four properties we have acquired, three has only my name as the owner). What I am saying is look before you leap, don't just marry anybody for marriage sake, marry someone who can add value to you. Whatever belongs to one belongs to the two of you. Jesus loves u.

nawtibownie:

Uncle, you didn't read this well. I'm not talking about a husband who's not earning up to my salary but a husband who is unwilling to work at all. Do you get it now?

IYANGBALI:
see me looking for trouble from my yansh

TooNoisy:
So what is he giving her husband money for?

If it is to pay part of the bills, then there is nothing wrong. If the husband can give the wife money, why can't the wife give her husband money?

gabazin080:
What's the big deal there. Though am working but my gf will bring her salary to me before taking out of it because she trusted me.

Don't let her c this thread o

Rukkydelta:
yes

Janix2:
I need honest answers.
Notice this days that Women earn than men.

sihom:
At Quertyquack,

I am flattered and would like dinner at Yellow Chilli or Terra Culture assuming you are also in Lasgidi i.e Lagos

Hey, holla back @ me whenever you see this. After reading your posts in the investment section I think I would like to pick your brain on financial matters.

And if Yellow Chilli or Terra Culture is too much of a hassle Debonairs' pizza will do just fine.

Lol

quertyquack:
Whoop! You got mail.

MrOrioye:


Marriage is an unending project so you’re free to try somethings sometimes (with care) to see if they will work for you. It’s true, women earn more than men these days. Personally, I believe you’re only helping yourself if you submit all you have (EVERYTHING) to your husband. Yes!! Don’t strike me yet…continue reading. It works for some people, and doesn’t for others. All depends on the kind of hubby you have. Different families with different formula. Wether one formula works or not depends on the personalities of the couple.

It makes some men lazy (so true), it makes some men sit up and for some others; indifferent.

This is a very critical matter in Marriage. In fact, i’d say so many marriages fail because of this. The worse thing is, it gets to a point they don’t remember what is responsible for the problems in the family. This is because men (with pride) pretend this subject doesn’t matter until they start seeing their wife spend on luxuries they can’t afford and maybe when friends begin to notice. An average man won’t come out to say what the problem is, he won’t want his wife to sense he is being intimidated by her actions. Regarding such matters and the likes, christian women want to hurriedly quote 1Tim 5:8 and Eph 5:25 and what i ask them is why jump to verse 25 ignoring verse 22? Well that’s a story for another day. Let me share my own personal experience.

I am a married man. Ever since i got married my wife has been practising what so many people on this thread call “the insensible”. She does direct transfer of her entire salary to my account and then comes to me when she needs anything. Its not as if i wasn’t working, i was but she earned more. We pay all bills and shop from my account. Well this act of insensibility has made our union stronger. From day one, up till this moment, money has never caused any argument in our house, not the slightest one.

She’s the smartest woman I’ve ever met. It took some time before i understood that if you persistently drop your fetcher in a dry well, you will one day draw out water. At first i thought it wasn't real and that she will change. I’m from a polygamous background and my orientation was that “women are this, women are that, they will ruin you if they know what you’re worth bla bla bla”. To my surprise, 1st yr, 2nd yr, 3rd yr she was 100% consistent (Note: during these years she was earning 40% more that i do).

So towards the end of the 3rd yr of our marriage, I started a company and gave her 100% access to all that I have, made her signatory to all my accounts including my company’s account and gave her the PIN to all Cards. Now ask yourself, who pays the bill? Myself or my wife? Who owns all my salary and proceeds from the company?


Let me tell you how it helped us

1. During the period she was earning more, i didn’t feel the pressure. And today whenever i remember it, I just text her to say “thank you”.
2. She imprinted the idea of “Money is just a tool” in me.
3. Whenever she requests for anything, I don’t say no. Not even when the amount involved is more than our joint salary. You know why?….She’s set the pace by making that big sacrifice.
4. I can’t spend a dime from "my account" without her consent. You know why? Something tells me inside that all the money is hers and i’ll be a gentle man to ask her permission.
5. I got to that point in a man’s life when i wanted to have extra marital affair. I couldn’t because i didn’t know how to defend monies i withdraw for any purpose other than business or home. And trust me, if its business, she knows everything about my business including all my clients. This is just a summary point but i tell you, it helped me overcome that trial at that particular time. Trust me, all married men gets to this cross road sometime in life and if nothing stops them then their relationship starts to decline. For some men, its conscience; their conscience fights them hard and wins, for some its a single church sermon (or other encounter) at the right time that helps, for me it was the transparency and accountability initiated by my wife that prevented me.
6. Then of course, having our monies together makes us do “everything” together (which is a key factor for transparency and accountability in our home”

Let me tell you how it could've been

1. There may not be 100% transparency & accountability. Due to the polygamous background i have, I could've been the kinda hubby that would not let his wife know what he is worth because I'm trying to hide my money (or worth). If you don’t know what he is worth, you’ll ask based on what you are worth or what you perceived him to be worth. That causes crisis because some men like to pretend they have even when they don’t, some like to pretend they don’t have even when they have. It is essential for you to know what the case is always. And for you to know, you will need to have access, for you to have access, you may (like in my case) need to earn it.

2. Who knows? During the times i didn't have much, I may not be able to ask directly and just keep suffering in silence. Trust me if that was the case, we may not be where we are today. This is how it works, whenever a man (not all) is worried especially due to lack of money, he can't have quality sex with you, and in some cases may not have sex with you at all. Now you may be asking yourself “why does it have to get to that point?” Well, situation caused the lack, he has ego, hence may not be able to ask; The fact that he knows you have and you’re not logical enough to understand angers him, and in turn, he will rant at everything you do. Then you’ll be the one to cry to your pastor/neighbour/mentor complaining theres no peace at home.

Thank God the later didn’t happen. We’re happy together. Now we both counsel people as a hobby.

My advise to you…

Know your hubby. Try the peaceful approach first….”submit all”. If you see its not working, halt! address the reason why its not working (he is drinking, flirting, insensibly generous, lazy and so on), after addressing the issue, then resume back. Apparently, Its best to keep both monies on the table and plan. That way you grow fast. The bible calls the woman “a helper”. You can not draw someone up from the ground without you first standing above them, so in that case God knows why you earn more.

Except for a shameless man, if you put your husband in charge of your money, you're only employing him as your manager and in turn getting unlimited access to his own purse. In some cases you're using that to show him how you want him to do. You're telling him you trust him with all you have and thereby enhancing transparency and accountability at home. Lastly, you're forcing him to plan with you; trust me, you'll enjoy it when your husband calls you to the table to plan with you.

........Like i said, this doesn't work for a shameless man.

chimkaire:
[/b]...yes , Englishmart, yes .Na so e suppose be . For peace to reign

Alezy:
smiles. ...urhobo gurl.
re u based there? ?

Miami11:
If she is crazy znd deranged she gives out part of her cheque.

Rukkydelta:
yes

Alezy:
Kk. ...errrrnmm, u av a mail

Rukkydelta:
yeah

sihom:
I think that money should go into a joint bank account created for the purpose of funding family/household projects - but I'm a single lady what do I know.

Three married women I know did this sort of thing on a regular basis, it led to their husbands becoming lazy and slacking off on responsibilities like paying school fees, house rent etcetera practically leaving those responsibilities to their wives to handle.

My only concern and fear is that your husband may go the way the men described above did. On the other hand another true life story of a married couple I know was different from the women above.

Tunde (not real name) was unemployed for seven years and all his attempts at business and finding a stable source of income wasn't yielding fruits. His wife (let's call her Kanwulia) on the other hand was gainfully employed and each time she received her salary she would give all of it to Tunde.

I figure she did this to honour Tunde as her husband and the head of the home. Tunde never took things for granted and always used the money wisely & prudently. No one ever knew the situation in that house for as long as it lasted not even their family & friends.

Today, Tunde & Kanwulia handle pre-marital counseling & classes at a certain church and they often share their story with intending couples.

You know your husband better than I do. Will he in the long run behave like Tunde or the other three husbands I mentioned?

A joint account thingy is what I would do in your shoes and since you earn more you can as well fund the account at a higher ratio than your husband with a caveat.

That caveat being that you are both signatories to the account and one person cannot withdraw funds without the knowledge & signature of the other. That way you are kept in the loop and aware of where your monies collectively as a couple is going to.

oyeezah:
exactly. i c nothing wrong in a woman helpn her husband financially as far as it is not to meet unnecessary wants. if ur husband can meet all ur family's needs all by himself, fine, but if not, help him.

MrOrioye:


Marriage is an unending project so you’re free to try somethings sometimes (with care) to see if they will work for you. It’s true, women earn more than men these days. Personally, I believe you’re only helping yourself if you submit all you have (EVERYTHING) to your husband. Yes!! Don’t strike me yet…continue reading. It works for some people, and doesn’t for others. All depends on the kind of hubby you have. Different families with different formula. Wether one formula works or not depends on the personalities of the couple.

It makes some men lazy (so true), it makes some men sit up and for some others; indifferent.

This is a very critical matter in Marriage. In fact, i’d say so many marriages fail because of this. The worse thing is, it gets to a point they don’t remember what is responsible for the problems in the family. This is because men (with pride) pretend this subject doesn’t matter until they start seeing their wife spend on luxuries they can’t afford and maybe when friends begin to notice. An average man won’t come out to say what the problem is, he won’t want his wife to sense he is being intimidated by her actions. Regarding such matters and the likes, christian women want to hurriedly quote 1Tim 5:8 and Eph 5:25 and what i ask them is why jump to verse 25 ignoring verse 22? Well that’s a story for another day. Let me share my own personal experience.

I am a married man. Ever since i got married my wife has been practising what so many people on this thread call “the insensible”. She does direct transfer of her entire salary to my account and then comes to me when she needs anything. Its not as if i wasn’t working, i was but she earned more. We pay all bills and shop from my account. Well this act of insensibility has made our union stronger. From day one, up till this moment, money has never caused any argument in our house, not the slightest one.

She’s the smartest woman I’ve ever met. It took some time before i understood that if you persistently drop your fetcher in a dry well, you will one day draw out water. At first i thought it wasn't real and that she will change. I’m from a polygamous background and my orientation was that “women are this, women are that, they will ruin you if they know what you’re worth bla bla bla”. To my surprise, 1st yr, 2nd yr, 3rd yr she was 100% consistent (Note: during these years she was earning 40% more that i do).

So towards the end of the 3rd yr of our marriage, I started a company and gave her 100% access to all that I have, made her signatory to all my accounts including my company’s account and gave her the PIN to all Cards. Now ask yourself, who pays the bill? Myself or my wife? Who owns all my salary and proceeds from the company?


Let me tell you how it helped us

1. During the period she was earning more, i didn’t feel the pressure. And today whenever i remember it, I just text her to say “thank you”.
2. She imprinted the idea of “Money is just a tool” in me.
3. Whenever she requests for anything, I don’t say no. Not even when the amount involved is more than our joint salary. You know why?….She’s set the pace by making that big sacrifice.
4. I can’t spend a dime from "my account" without her consent. You know why? Something tells me inside that all the money is hers and i’ll be a gentle man to ask her permission.
5. I got to that point in a man’s life when i wanted to have extra marital affair. I couldn’t because i didn’t know how to defend monies i withdraw for any purpose other than business or home. And trust me, if its business, she knows everything about my business including all my clients. This is just a summary point but i tell you, it helped me overcome that trial at that particular time. Trust me, all married men gets to this cross road sometime in life and if nothing stops them then their relationship starts to decline. For some men, its conscience; their conscience fights them hard and wins, for some its a single church sermon (or other encounter) at the right time that helps, for me it was the transparency and accountability initiated by my wife that prevented me.
6. Then of course, having our monies together makes us do “everything” together (which is a key factor for transparency and accountability in our home”

Let me tell you how it could've been

1. There may not be 100% transparency & accountability. Due to the polygamous background i have, I could've been the kinda hubby that would not let his wife know what he is worth because I'm trying to hide my money (or worth). If you don’t know what he is worth, you’ll ask based on what you are worth or what you perceived him to be worth. That causes crisis because some men like to pretend they have even when they don’t, some like to pretend they don’t have even when they have. It is essential for you to know what the case is always. And for you to know, you will need to have access, for you to have access, you may (like in my case) need to earn it.

2. Who knows? During the times i didn't have much, I may not be able to ask directly and just keep suffering in silence. Trust me if that was the case, we may not be where we are today. This is how it works, whenever a man (not all) is worried especially due to lack of money, he can't have quality sex with you, and in some cases may not have sex with you at all. Now you may be asking yourself “why does it have to get to that point?” Well, situation caused the lack, he has ego, hence may not be able to ask; The fact that he knows you have and you’re not logical enough to understand angers him, and in turn, he will rant at everything you do. Then you’ll be the one to cry to your pastor/neighbour/mentor complaining theres no peace at home.

Thank God the later didn’t happen. We’re happy together. Now we both counsel people as a hobby.

My advise to you…

Know your hubby. Try the peaceful approach first….”submit all”. If you see its not working, halt! address the reason why its not working (he is drinking, flirting, insensibly generous, lazy and so on), after addressing the issue, then resume back. Apparently, Its best to keep both monies on the table and plan. That way you grow fast. The bible calls the woman “a helper”. You can not draw someone up from the ground without you first standing above them, so in that case God knows why you earn more.

Except for a shameless man, if you put your husband in charge of your money, you're only employing him as your manager and in turn getting unlimited access to his own purse. In some cases you're using that to show him how you want him to do. You're telling him you trust him with all you have and thereby enhancing transparency and accountability at home. Lastly, you're forcing him to plan with you; trust me, you'll enjoy it when your husband calls you to the table to plan with you.

........Like i said, this doesn't work for a shameless man.

Evvilgenius:

Wife material