Sigh... people don't. get sarcasm...

Onegai:
Seriously, can someone find this young "upstanding" citizen of the Female population and hand her over to Mustapha Audu and his cohorts?

(Too soon? )

mustapha is married.dont you have any male relatives

lalasticlala help move her ministry to the appropriate quarters since I have no advice for you...

how did you end up in dating him at the first place? a signs the handsome guys are not forth coming by. so with no option you decide to hang around with him. I would want to have a doubt about your beauty claims. men go after beautiful girls even with bad character. i know your boyfriend is ugly and you need handsome guy but what more do you need from a guy outside of handsome,? I am sure when you finally find that handsome guy you will find some other excuse. by the way most handsome guys has no regards for girls hope you will not end up with one who will treat you like trash and come here to complain again. my advice is to leave that guy. don't bother staying around since the guy already hoping for marriage.

Let the guy go Op.You are not the best person for him.He deserves better.

@OP; you really need to work on the way you describe other people especially if they are not up to your standard. If the irritation is along the lines of how they look physically of which they have no control over; learn to accept them the way they are and not try to bring them down.

Try not to look down on any man; be it a poor/rich man or ugly/handsome man. A MAN IS A MAN WHETHER HE’S UGLY, HANDSOME, FROM A HUMBLE, AVERAGE OR RICH BACKGROUND. As you’re seeking a handsome man, I hope you’re pretty yourself (No offence hope none taken) as being good-looking seems to be something you emphasize on; maybe/may be not.

That said, now permit me to ask you this question, how would you feel if someone constantly criticizes you in an area where you have no control over e.g your looks/stature? I’m sure you’ll not feel happy about it. Now put yourself in the shoes of this current guy and deliberate.

You talk as if you yourself are Miss 100% perfect and have no flaws. Listen up gurl, I'm sure this current guy is putting up with your fault/flaws without blowing your trumpet as loud as you’re blowing his. If this current guy were to make a list of your flaws, it’ll be as long as my arm but yet, he manages yours and probably don’t complain so much as you’re whining about his looks. I can just imagine the agony and pains he’s going through just to please you; but obviously that’s not enough as you have said yourself that you keep looking at your wristwatch when you’re out with him for the time to pass quickly. It’s disrespectful doing that when you’re out on a date.

To love someone is a beautiful thing; and when one is seeking a partner, there are certain factors you need to consider before taking the “I DO” step as MARRIAGE IS NOT A BED OF ROSES. The factors are; Love, Compatibility, Respect and Friendship.

The few questions mentioned below, can you in your heart answer yes to all regarding the current guy;

Is he caring?
Is he decent?
Is he hardworking?
Is he supportive?
Does he love you?

Also note these 2 points;

1) Never marry anyone out of pity simply because you have been with them for a long time and you don’t want them to lose out.

2) Marry for true love so that when the challenges start occurring in the marital bond (and best believe challenges would arise) that the love both of you have built up would be able to withstand the ups and downs that would occur.

We all have preference’ as to what we want in a partner; but laying so much emphasis on LOOKS can be a dangerous game. Besides, you’re entitled to marry a handsome man IF THAT’S WHAT YOU WANT AND WOULD MAKE YOU HAPPY. Always look at the potential for the future in a man when seeking for a mate and not just his looks. Note that you can marry a handsome/ugly man who’ll deal with you mercilessly and disrespect you on every occasion and not give you the peace you require. On the other hand you can also marry a handsome/ugly man that would give you peace and love you dearly; you just never know.

It would be in your best interest to TO AVOID PROLONGING THIS MATTER ANY LONGER. If you honestly would not be able to look beyond the “PROBLEM AREA” which you class as his looks not being up to your standards; PLEASE FREE HIM AND FREE YOURSELF. Don’t have a selfish attitude (No offence hope none taken) where you want to have your cake and eat it by keeping him and STILL HAVING THESE NAGGING DOUBTS/ISSUES THAT YOU CAN’T OVERLOOK.

The decision is yours entirely whether to carry on with him or let him be (beauty is in the eye of the beholder); though it'll be totally out of a selfish interest to allow him to chase other women away (one man’s meet is another man’s poison) with his knowledge that he has met his wife; meanwhile you’re in doubt if you have met your husband; as that’s the way it looks at the moment . Also to re-emphasis that you might find a handsome guy (who might deal with you mercilessly through his character), but might not be a “Husband material”.

Finally, look for more important qualities that a man has (as mentioned above) aside money/looks before settling down with him to avoid stories that touch/hurt. NEVER EVER PUT HIS LOOKS, MONEY AND RICHES FIRST AND BLIND YOU IN HIS SHORT-COMINGS TO AVOID POTENTIAL PROBLEMS AFTER MARRIAGE.

I rest my case

@Kagorba3, It's better to even be in love with someone that love you more than you love them.

What is the meaning of marriage if you think he possess some uncontrollable character?
Marriage means "Help Meet". You are in the marriage to make him better so does he. Don't look at the now, look at the seemingly brighter future you two would have together.

Physical appearance deceives, what you have in your heart is what counts. And with the way you're thinking, it's as if you don't expect EXCELLENCE in your marriage. You're being selfish with your thoughts now.

If you know you don't want or deserves this Wonderful man's Love in your life, i would advice you tell him now so that he'll go for his real soul-mate because what you want seems to be Physical Attraction.

With the waý you're going, i just pray you marriage(s) won't end up in Divorce(s). Think, pray and let God lead you.
Goodluck!!!

Er OP you can change the topic of the thread now since this guy is a no-go
good luck with the next one

Do not waste his time and yours. It is obvious you don't love him. He even went an extra mile to laugh on your dry jokes just to please you.....
Jizzzz!!!! I wish i have his number and revoke his dude membership............

Anyways, The time you were wasting dating him or going for a meaningless date, You might have found someone that finds you fascinating despite your foul-mouth, And my brother must have blocked your chance for that because Mr. right might be thinking you were with him.

on the other hand, those lovely single ladies that stayed clear from sight when you guys made your cool entrance and envied you; that you were on a date with a perfect gentleman would have come closer assuming he was all alone.

So why are you wasting more time? free him. beside there are no better way of breaking up with someone that is pain-free, If that is what you are scared if.

OP,

You speak of him with disdain. He deserves better, much better than you.

You're hoping someone else will come along but you haven't found anyone else,

so you're leading this guy on in the meantime.


Part and go your separate ways.

Why marry someone you don't want to get married to?

You are not attracted to him. while it may happen. the chances are slim. U said you are far from it.
Deep down the answers lie in your heart. nothing we say can will help.

Find the answers from deep within

End time OP

Just moved on girl, don't love him out of pity. Don't marry him if you don't love him, tell him you don't feel a thing for him. He will be badly hurt but he will thank you years later for tellinq him the truth..#thank you

Follow ur heart

By d time she's 40 n still single, she'll be desperately attracted to him......RUBBISH!

Marriage is not about managing 'him' if you don't like him, let him go please

Receive sense IJN

succyreal:
Endtime couple to be

succyreal:
Endtime couple to be

Wicked perzon

The way some girl act as if they're the prettiest or maybe there isn't anyone else out there who can love the guy.
I'm far from a wife beater but you sound like a woman who needs someone to slap some sense into her.

kagorba3:
Right now I'm confused and frustrated at the same time still I don't wanna make lifetime mistakes.


Here is my plight...There's is a young man seriously in love with me but I'm far from liking him let alone love him yet he wouldn't stop, this his relenting spirit kinda attracted me to him but still I can't find a place in my heart to accommodate him, everything about him just irritate me, he laughs uncontrollably over my not so funny jokes, from the look of things he seems so happy and settled with me yet I'm at the opposite end, whenever we have a date I do keep an eye on my wrist watch and keep wishing time flies so fast.

But I discover he is serious and focused and sound to interact and have a meaningful convo with but his physical looks is just a big turn off, I really wanna give birth to lovely kids not some "oputu poyoyo" please y'all should not tell me to look beyond looks cos these things do come into play...I'm saying this cos my mouth no good oh, anyday we have any misunderstanding I might mistakenly yab away his future.

I have been postponing giving him a yes hoping for someone presentable to show these signs of seriousness but no way, now he has fix March for the main thing, all my thoughts now is how can I maneuver my way and make all my kids take after my beauty instead of his and it's my baby girl I'm so scared for cos most baby girls take over their dad.

Note: he's not rich oh just a struggling guy before y'all will conclude I'm into his money, the only thing is he acts different from the rest that will just act so sex starved, any focus girl wants a focused guy too but to tell y'all the truth I'm still in doubt since I don't feel a thing for him and he seem not to be bothered which I'm certain he will after the main thing.

Please to the lovely ladies that once said yes to a not so presentable guy(I mean a man with bending shaped head, undefined complexion and petit in nature ) how is the journey so far

Kai.. See wat happens when a man has unnecessary hope.. E go always miss im bus stop..

Once I scope babe once and I sight any no sign in her countenance.. It's onto the next one.. No tym!! I no go even wait for her to talk the No sef..

I advise u just shatter his heart by telling him the truth.. Which is u are not interested in him. The guy would count his losses, and u would count your blessings..

If he refuse.. Carry im matter enter church and declare spiritual warfare..

Your inexperience is clouding your statement!

There are some guys who never listen! Them deaf, dem even blind to body language!
I called them the love sick guys! Na only them dey love. She's not the one wasting the guy time, nah d guy! He knows she doesnt love him, yet he's still coming around! Whose fault

pet4ril:
If this guy were your brother, would you have loved someone to play with his feelings Its possible the dude wants to settle down, so i beg you in the name of whatever you believe in, stop wasting his time and wait for your mr handsome to come your way tell him to find his way for one mans poison is another mans food

Run, Run

[quote author=Young03 post=40529445]only thing I would say to u is to be focused, alredy u av made up ur mind not to marry him but due to d fact dat he keeps pressurizing u...u want to accept.


if u know he z not attracted to u,don't let him in to avoid stories dat touch but..


if age no de ur side, sista run go Marry her

note..he loves u dat anytin u do , he sees it as a good thing, dat kind of a man will never let u down...


Follow your subconcious mind.

My dear I will advice u to grab him with both hands and cast that spirit in u that is making u dislike the guy. U met someone that laffs at ur dry jokes and feels comfortable with u and u are complaining. Nne pls if u dont like him biko inbox me his number.


Ps: do let us know when u meet the one u like

mumu story.... nairaland admin please don't just post pls.....this is a forum and not a love site just saying ...

But life is simple, why complicate it?

You're not attracted to someone at this stage, even if you pretend to be attracted, it'll fade off in due course.

Ever heard about marrying your best friend?

Maybe you're not mature enough to marry, but yet again I believe someone that says most girls usually don't know what they want.

Summary: leave the poor dude alone. Better a broken relationship than a broken marriage.

kagorba3:
Right now I'm confused and frustrated at the same time still I don't wanna make lifetime mistakes.


Here is my plight...There's is a young man seriously in love with me but I'm far from liking him let alone love him yet he wouldn't stop, this his relenting spirit kinda attracted me to him but still I can't find a place in my heart to accommodate him, everything about him just irritate me, he laughs uncontrollably over my not so funny jokes, from the look of things he seems so happy and settled with me yet I'm at the opposite end, whenever we have a date I do keep an eye on my wrist watch and keep wishing time flies so fast.

But I discover he is serious and focused and sound to interact and have a meaningful convo with but his physical looks is just a big turn off, I really wanna give birth to lovely kids not some "oputu poyoyo" please y'all should not tell me to look beyond looks cos these things do come into play...I'm saying this cos my mouth no good oh, anyday we have any misunderstanding I might mistakenly yab away his future.

I have been postponing giving him a yes hoping for someone presentable to show these signs of seriousness but no way, now he has fix March for the main thing, all my thoughts now is how can I maneuver my way and make all my kids take after my beauty instead of his and it's my baby girl I'm so scared for cos most baby girls take over their dad.

Note: he's not rich oh just a struggling guy before y'all will conclude I'm into his money, the only thing is he acts different from the rest that will just act so sex starved, any focus girl wants a focused guy too but to tell y'all the truth I'm still in doubt since I don't feel a thing for him and he seem not to be bothered which I'm certain he will after the main thing.

Please to the lovely ladies that once said yes to a not so presentable guy(I mean a man with bending shaped head, undefined complexion and petit in nature ) how is the journey so far

I can see u love Troubles.
Just prepare, because that MOUTH u have will soon be converted to spoon...,

pet4ril:
If this guy were your brother, would you have loved someone to play with his feelings Its possible the dude wants to settle down, so i beg you in the name of whatever you believe in, stop wasting his time and wait for your mr handsome to come your way tell him to find his way for one mans poison is another mans food

I agree with you to an extend ,since marriage is a life institution to avoid the babe going outside in search of handsome guy.she should tell him since her happiness also matters