Raplinx Vs. Obesemf. . .

Topic: Memories Back Then
This is pretty simple - I want both of you to paint a vivid picture of your past memories growing up, the ups and downs, the niggas that you lost or made it alive till today, the bytches, the wild parties, school memories, anything about your past that you cherish or despise. More like what Greyline did when he created that his thread where hommies were free-styling about their pasts. You can also listen T.I -Memories Back Then Ft. Kendrick Lamar, B.O.B and Kris Stephens to get a better picture. That's where I got the idea from. Infuse metaphors and puns into your writtens to make it more entertaining and score y'all more points. Good luck. Thread coming up tomorrow.

Criterias:

Creativity - 2 points

Rhymes - 2 points

Flow - 1 point

Puns and Metaphors: 2 points

Consistency on Topic - 3 points

Imagery - 2 points

Rules:
No recycling, biting, complaining, whining, swaying, free-
posting or bytching.

12 bars Maximum = 22 Total Lines.

Due Date: Saturday, December 5th, 2015.

Time: 6:00PM

Good Luck!!!

Back then was great Yes back then the past My younger self… Before the mask formed Before school, when friends were plenty. We were pure but weak Back then before it all… Before enemies Before I became a fighter Before I realized I was weak Before I threw away and broke my mask. Back then was great Things were so easier Things were made up, and acceptable I was in a small shell, protected Back then before I threw it all away Back then when I got away with many things Back then when my imagination was large and pure Back then is dead…. Now after I took many things for granted I see and compare things from back then And see how much things have change Back then the whole world in the same spot Now we made many steps forward But some many back, Back then when the thing I loved was original Now it’s replaced and hated by original fans Back then when soft music made me wish I was there Now I wish I could feel more pain Back then before Homophobia captured me So far back So deep into the sea of lost memories But won’t fall into the abyss Cause it’s collapsed on itself Back then I see a small hole to see different memories Back then when CORE ruled Tomb raider The thing I loved but took it for granted Now Crystal dynamic’s killed Lara Now I wish I could runaway and hide from the truth Back then when quiet protected me and made me safe Now the quiet scares because it always screams the truth Now the quiet means karma coming and I’m in for regret. Back then when lies helped me and kept me from the real world Now I fight and criticize the truth. Now I doubt and lie to myself, But I also believe in what I want to believe Back then I never had to fight battles Now I fight and battle between christen beliefs I fight old adversaries after back then I fight my friends, enemies and want to fight the world. No matter what back then died Because of Time, and me Back then was murdered in cold blood It was left behind and forgotten I am a ruthless cruel bastard Back then when I never hated my father Back then when he never sold drugs Back then before I was born when my mother was together with him And back then when he was still free and not in jail Now I want to beat the shit of him And give him a black eye. Back then my mother beat him up 3 times Now she dosen’t cares if he’s alive or not and still never talks about him. Now is great also great. Back then my mother would drink herself silly Now she’s three years sober and takes pills for her liver. Back then I barely talked to her Now I see her everyday when she gets from work and talk to her every 2-5 minutes Back then when my older step brother did drugs Back then when he was kicked out Now he’s changed and back into our lives Back then when my step father drunk to much and smoked everyday. Back then when he threw up, from drinking. Now he only drinks a little and has a job. Back then when my mom had her job before I was born to 2008 Now she works at a better new job. Back then when I barely knew my family Now I know all of 6 uncles and 2 aunts they all love me Back then when I knew Tomb raider and Edios didn’t fire CORE Now it made me wish Edios was dead. Back then when my apartment with neighbors was still up. Now it’s destroyed because the inside burned up along with my two cats. After that I think the wrong ones died. Now I haven’t cried about it in 2 years Back then is alive and locked in my head Back then is angry and being sadistic, Back then took advantage of my naive self Back then I didn’t know what to do with myself Back then I was mixed up with time Also with life. Now is the present and is my ally Now I have myself together and know what I want to do Now I see the truth and won’t try to run away Now I won’t accept lies Now I won’t be in a shell Now I’ll fight my battles Now I’ll think about what I do. Back then I was nothing… Now I’m who I want to be and make most of my rules… Back then I was helpless and could keep anything together Now I I’ll yell and cuss and interfere to keep relations together. Back then is the past Now is Present…

ruffyola:
Back then was great
Yes back then the past
My younger self…
Before the mask formed
Before school, when friends were plenty.
We were pure but weak
Back then before it all…
Before enemies
Before I became a fighter
Before I realized I was weak
Before I threw away and broke my mask.
Back then was great
Things were so easier
Things were made up, and acceptable
I was in a small shell, protected
Back then before I threw it all away
Back then when I got away with many things
Back then when my imagination was large and
pure
Back then is dead….
Now after I took many things for granted
I see and compare things from back then
And see how much things have change
Back then the whole world in the same spot
Now we made many steps forward
But some many back,
Back then when the thing I loved was original
Now it’s replaced and hated by original fans
Back then when soft music made me wish I was
there
Now I wish I could feel more pain
Back then before Homophobia captured me
So far back
So deep into the sea of lost memories
But won’t fall into the abyss
Cause it’s collapsed on itself
Back then I see a small hole to see different
memories
Back then when CORE ruled Tomb raider
The thing I loved but took it for granted
Now Crystal dynamic’s killed Lara
Now I wish I could runaway and hide from the
truth
Back then when quiet protected me and made me
safe
Now the quiet scares because it always screams
the truth
Now the quiet means karma coming and I’m in
for regret.
Back then when lies helped me and kept me from
the real world
Now I fight and criticize the truth.
Now I doubt and lie to myself,
But I also believe in what I want to believe
Back then I never had to fight battles
Now I fight and battle between christen beliefs
I fight old adversaries after back then
I fight my friends, enemies and want to fight the
world.
No matter what back then died
Because of Time, and me
Back then was murdered in cold blood
It was left behind and forgotten
I am a ruthless cruel bastard
Back then when I never hated my father
Back then when he never sold drugs
Back then before I was born when my mother
was together with him
And back then when he was still free and not in
jail
Now I want to beat the shit of him
And give him a black eye.
Back then my mother beat him up 3 times
Now she dosen’t cares if he’s alive or not and
still never talks about him.
Now is great also great.
Back then my mother would drink herself silly
Now she’s three years sober and takes pills for
her liver.
Back then I barely talked to her
Now I see her everyday when she gets from work
and talk to her every 2-5 minutes
Back then when my older step brother did drugs
Back then when he was kicked out
Now he’s changed and back into our lives
Back then when my step father drunk to much
and smoked everyday.
Back then when he threw up, from drinking.
Now he only drinks a little and has a job.
Back then when my mom had her job before I
was born to 2008
Now she works at a better new job.
Back then when I barely knew my family
Now I know all of 6 uncles and 2 aunts they all
love me
Back then when I knew Tomb raider and Edios
didn’t fire CORE
Now it made me wish Edios was dead.
Back then when my apartment with neighbors
was still up.
Now it’s destroyed because the inside burned up
along with my two cats.
After that I think the wrong ones died.
Now I haven’t cried about it in 2 years
Back then is alive and locked in my head
Back then is angry and being sadistic,
Back then took advantage of my naive self
Back then I didn’t know what to do with myself
Back then I was mixed up with time
Also with life.
Now is the present and is my ally
Now I have myself together and know what I want
to do
Now I see the truth and won’t try to run away
Now I won’t accept lies
Now I won’t be in a shell
Now I’ll fight my battles
Now I’ll think about what I do.
Back then I was nothing…
Now I’m who I want to be and make most of my
rules…
Back then I was helpless and could keep anything
together
Now I I’ll yell and cuss and interfere to keep
relations together.
Back then is the past
Now is Present…

Is this Obesemf's verse?

Cc; KrOne, Sinizia, Reyginus

Raplinx:


Is this Ob.esemf's verse?

Cc; Kr.One, Sin.izia, Rey.ginus

NO, that's not Obese, and you guys are to post tomorrow 6pm not today. Ignore it.

that gutter behind the Anglican school, i fell in it twice
thought i was wise, but my mum thought otherwise
other wise people I ate in plates with, died before they could vote
I seen mothers bury children, lamenting on who'll perform their final rights
its alright, I write to my mother, telling her i'll make my decisions all right

back in the days,
mango tree climbing, had my grades declining
because of this girl, who gave me naive thoughts
my young mind told me; "Presenting mangoes, will let you grab her oranges"
twas a weird analogy
love letters and many apologies

i learnt acrobatics
we practiced on sawdust in an abandoned cemetery
a drunkard once cursed us
now i have a bad back, Kofi drinks, David is in a wheelchair
_shit i did back in the day seems to haunt me

from my experiences back in the day, i can spin a street tale
and go into detail
here i go, from the head to the tail
twas the eve of Christmas 2005
had been on earth for eight years, too naive to thank God for my life
only firecrackers on my mind, i imagined the light
i imagined the fright of people if i decided to strike
the fights it'll incite, the anger it will ignite
i went inside, Dad's black trousers were my target
i found nothing, checked mama's blue condensed milk tray, enough coins to lead me to the market
run to my friends, flipflops on the wrong feet
i've reached my limit, the rest is for another day
i remember the rest and laugh at stuff i did back in the day

Memories Back then
.
I sat on ma crib n Reminisce/
like 'unmarried ladies'... those days i miss/
playing d Rubber bands, wheels n Tyres was my genesis/
when mum kept me lively with her tender kiss/
now i'm monalisa... bitches on lipsticks/
painting me with deadly french Kiss/
Never feel like getting these thoughts dismissed/
cos childhood was truely a Bliss!/
.
When we sat in the class bragged how we sail/ n mocked those who failed/
vividly my mentality then was fragile n frail/
everyone hailed/ i made mum proud when i emerged the head boy then/
now Time left me in the streets with Tails/
..
Now the memory kept fuming!/
when my beloved bread winner booming/
planted we roses he spent his life glooming/
yet never lived to see his flowers blooming!/
...
.
Back then i thought i'd blow with my 1st song/
n later realised something wrong/ it was the bell i sounded like i was dumb/
bt advices echoed from mum/
son to be man,,, never accept wages... Cos it aint a day work!/
.
When it was time to compete/
i vowed never to retreat/
got up on ma feet n turned to the streets/
.
Had to face all the odds/
1st i met Joe n Bob/ we named the gang 'outlaw'/ then laced up our squad/
together we beat every odd/
even if t'was 3 of us against the world/
.
.

I still sit back n reminisce the memories back then!!
Cc; Reyginus, Sinizia, KrOne.
Pls i need ur critics here n advice as well.

obesemf:
that gutter behind the Anglican school, i fell in it twice
thought i was wise, but my mum thought otherwise
other wise people I ate in plates with, died before they could vote
I seen mothers bury children, lamenting on who'll perform their final rights
its alright, I write to my mother, telling her i'll make my decisions all right

back in the days,
mango tree climbing, had my grades declining
because of this girl, who gave me naive thoughts
my young mind told me; "Presenting mangoes, will let you grab her oranges"
twas a weird analogy
love letters and many apologies

i learnt acrobatics
we practiced on sawdust in an abandoned cemetery
a drunkard once cursed us
now i have a bad back, Kofi drinks, David is in a wheelchair
_shit i did back in the day seems to haunt me

from my experiences back in the day, i can spin a street tale
and go into detail
here i go, from the head to the tail
twas the eve of Christmas 2005
had been on earth for eight years, too naive to thank God for my life
only firecrackers on my mind, i imagined the light
i imagined the fright of people if i decided to strike
the fights it'll incite, the anger it will ignite
i went inside, Dad's black trousers were my target
i found nothing, checked mama's blue condensed milk tray, enough coins to lead me to the market
run to my friends, flipflops on the wrong feet
i've reached my limit, the rest is for another day
i remember the rest and laugh at stuff i did back in the day

seen

Cc: Funlord

Adanna28

Emaprince

Kr0ne

Guykhena

Ksslib

Elymaxiimus


Your votes are needed here please.

Men! This was a severe battle! Both guys definitely brought it!

Anyway in fairness obesemf and raplinx were both consistent, and flowed nicely, raplinx had more rhymes but he lost me towards the closing graph( starting from the joe, bob and outlaw parts just felt lazy), obesemf's imagery was nice and stirred up memories of youth a lot better than linxs! In other words it was more 'poetic' in nature!

But both contestants seemed more comfortable in painting 'scenarios of youth', it would have been nice to see some scripts about how they transformed to 'men, the rap life, the streets etc!' Content was lacking guys, it won't be overlooked in subsequent rounds for sure!

Mvgt; obesemf

nice piece.. really nice, was able to connect with both...

Based on criteria and what I think the Op really wanted, I'd say the two lads did a fair job of the topic. So I won't bother judging with the criteria. The competition is almost 50/50 but I think Obesemf takes this with a slight edge. His experience from Grayline's thread must have given him an insight. I try visualizing the imagery from both verses and I see myself relating more with Obesemf's. So while Raplinx was more consistent with rhymes and puns, Obesemf was giving us a hood mental picture of his childhood background.

Best parts:

back in the days,
mango tree climbing, had my grades declining
because of this girl, who gave me naive thoughts
my young mind told me; "Presenting mangoes, will let you grab her oranges"
twas a weird analogy
love letters and many apologies - Obesemf

When we sat in the class bragged how we sail/ n mocked those who failed/
vividly my mentality then was fragile n frail/
everyone hailed/ i made mum proud when i emerged the head boy then/
now Time left me in the streets with Tails/ - Raplinx

MVGT - Obesemf!

kr0ne:
Based on criteria and what I think the Op really wanted, I'd say the two lads did a fair job of the topic. So I won't bother judging with the criteria. The competition is almost 50/50 but I think Obesemf takes this with a slight edge. His experience from Grayline's thread must have given him an insight. I try visualizing the imagery from both verses and I see myself relating more with Obesemf's. So while Raplinx was more consistent with rhymes and puns, Obesemf was giving us a hood mental picture of his childhood background.

Best parts:




MVGT - Raplinx!

Lol

PeinDanzo:


Lol

Edit am joor!! That was a mistake.

MVGT: Obesemf.


I love everything about both ninja's drops. It's 50-50 to me, but due to a winner got to emerge, I'll give it Obesemf based on enjoybility/more entertaining. Nice one Raplinx, you came good.


Obesemf proceeds to the next round for garnering all votes.