“I was always looking outside myself for strength and confidence, but it comes from within. It is there all the time”.

Anna Freud



One of the major challenges of individuals in achieving their dreams is the mind-set of inadequacy, holding their gifts in a defective mode.

It is often said that you cannot give what you do not have. I believe that you can also not give what you have but you are holding in a defective mode. This is perhaps one of the reasons why we have able hands but feeble minds.

Until you realise the value of what you have, you cannot appreciate it to the point where it becomes invaluable.

A story of a woman was once told. She lost her husband who was affiliated by work to a great man.

She inherited debt from her late husband and the debtor was about to take hold of her two sons as slaves in lieu of the debt. She seemed helpless about the whole situation as she felt she did not have any means of resolving the issue. She finally decided to seek for help. She approached the great man who she felt could help her, and narrated her ordeal. She started by saying how good a worker her husband was and how she was now in trouble due to the loan the husband left her to service. The great man said to her “I wonder how I can be of help. Tell me, what do you have in your house?”.

Her immediate response was “Nothing”, “Well, I do have a little jar of oil”. Her first response was that she had nothing but on a second thought, she said she had some resources in the form of a jar of oil. She did not however reckon that the jar of oil could be of any help, in other words, she held it in a defective mode.

The great man helped her see the potential in the jar of oil and instructed her on what she should do about it. He taught her how to package it in a useful form and told her to commercialise it. She was able to pay up her debt and also had enough to take care of her family.

In practical terms, relative to career issues, the situation of the woman could be likened to any of the instances below;

- You are a fresh graduate who is currently unemployed or underemployed against your plan and you put all the blame on government for not providing jobs
- An employee who has just been laid off and has no idea what next. You are complaining of how bad you were treated despite your commitment to the organisation and your long years of service.
- You are an employee, you are preoccupied with seeking a greener pasture because your job is like what could be called a nightmare. You complain about your boss, the colleague that is not doing his bit, the bad policy of the organisation, the poor pay etc.
- You have a strong desire to do something different but you don’t know how. You keep identifying everything that is wrong and that will not make you start.
- You live with the thought that your job is soon going to be over because the organisation you work for is not doing well. You consider yourself helpless in this situation and think that you don’t have anything to offer.

What makes the above instances similar to the case of the woman is not just because they are challenges people face, but the helplessness mind-set with which such instances are held like the woman. She thought she had nothing to solve her problem like most people would assume, forgetting that strength actually comes from within, from what we have.

Many unemployed graduates for instance go about with the mind-set that there are no jobs; hence there is nothing they can do about it. They spend years waiting to be called for a job offer or they pick up whatever is available where they end up being miserable with the work conditions.

With some rethinking, the woman realised that she had something, but she never reckoned that what she had was sufficient or good enough to build anything on. She therefore held that which she had in a defective mode.

Isn’t it surprising that the great man she ran to for help asked her what she wanted him to do and what she had in her possession? She had approached the man with a lot of sentiments, expecting to be pitied and probably given a handout to help her pay her debt. But the great man wouldn’t do any of that because he knew that solutions to problems start with the resources we have in our possessions.

The great man was able to help her create a plan to have an edge over her challenges. She never thought about it that way before for some reasons.

1. Her problems were too much of a concern that they were her focus. Though she wanted a solution, but her focus was the problem. When you are confronted with a problem, focus on the solution rather than the problem. What you focus on becomes expanded. You would notice the demonstration of being problem, rather than solution focussed in her response when she was asked the question “what do you have”. Her response was that she had nothing. She later added that she had a little jar of oil, which to her could never have been in any way useful in solving her problem. When you do not think solution, every resource available to help is disparaged. Many unemployed individuals focus on the conditions of unemployment to the extent that they refused to see the potentials they have that are begging to be converted into value which other people can pay for. They hardly see these potentials because they are held in a defective mode the same way the woman held the jar of oil. The focus is usually on the academic certificate that qualifies them to search for a job and when the labour market is not generous with job offers, it is as if nothing else (skills, knowledge, abilities, potentials) matters.

2. Like many people, she believed that she had to be connected to a VIP (Very Important Personality) before her problem can be solved. While there is nothing wrong with being connected to a VIP, they are better disposed to help people who bring some form of resources to the table with which they can be helped. In her own case, she wanted to dump her problems on the great man, hence, she started with some sentimental prefatory, talking about how good the husband was, devoted etc. Did you notice that the great man (the VIP in the story) did not acknowledge all those sentiments? Yes, because he knew the solution to the problem did not lie in those sentiments. His question to her was, what do you have with which I can help you?

The big lesson here is that what you need first is not a VIP or some external influence to solve your career challenges but recognition of what you have and how you can use it effectively and productively. You therefore need to identify what you have that can help you resolve the challenge. Doing this can point you to where to seek help and the type of help you need to seek. In the practice of career counselling, the role of the counsellor is to help the client discover the resources he/she has to resolve whatever challenge that is brought before the counsellor. This is because the solution actually lies within.

3. She never believed she had any resource to help her solve her problem. When the great man asked her what she had that can be used to solve her problem, she said “nothing”. Meanwhile, in the little she had was the solution to her problem. The great man knew that whatever anyone has is a sufficient platform to build on. He decided to help her to have an edge over her problems with what she has by teaching her how to use it properly. Every individual is gifted in specific areas.

A saying goes “the razor blade is sharp but cannot cut a tree; also the axe is strong but cannot shave the hair or cut the nails”, meaning everyone has potentials and the potentials are important according to his/her unique purpose. The major part of the problem I presume is when a razor blade starts to think it is not useful because it cannot cut a tree and an axe starts thinking that a razor blade is better because it cuts nails. Each of these “personality” then assumes a position of defect, discounting the inherent abilities and never able to create and add value fit for their potentials.

4. She was not looking inside out but outside in to solve her problem. By a stroke of inspiration, she had a rethink and said “well, I do have a little jar of oil”. Notice the use of the word “well” in her response. This signifies that though I have this, but what can it do to solve my problem. The challenge with people is that they have skills, potentials, abilities and resources at their disposal but they either hold it in a defective mode or don’t know how to convert it to an edge over their career circumstances.

The totality of her disposition to the problem was defective from the onset but with the wisdom and the guidance of the great man, she got her problem solved. What you actually need to solve your career challenge is to look within you, have a rethink of your current approach to solving the issues and seek for qualified help to do this where appropriate.

5. She did not realise that she needed to create value with what she had no matter how small and look for where she can add the value created. I am intrigued by the story of a lady who was a guest on a radio programme. She worked as a PA to the MD of a company before she resigned and decided to start creating value with ‘her jar of oil’. She said she loves making different types of soup and she used to do that for her friends when she was in the university without charging for it. She considered that a passion and after a spell at a job she was not enjoying, she left to start making soup for people and retail outlets, but this time earning money for her services. Relative to the woman in the story, she could have said she had nothing, however, not only did she realise that she had something, she also converted it into value and she commercialised it. She sounded very enthusiastic with what she was doing and she reeled out some of the plans for expansion and growth in her newly rediscovered passion. For instance, she mentioned that she was starting a learning programme where she will be teaching married women how to make different types of soup. To her, she has created another stream of income, and somehow, she might also be saving some marriages from collapse. The resources in your possession are solutions to the problems of some people, until you identify what those problems are and you package your resources as a solution, you are still in the defective mode.

You have inherent potentials, discover it, package it as value and commercialise it. Stop looking for a solution where it does not exist. Make that decision today to identify the problems you are a solution to.

Source: http://thecareeredge.biz/careerinsights/?p=492

jobskills:
“I was always looking outside myself for strength and confidence, but it comes from within. It is there all the time”.

Anna Freud



One of the major challenges of individuals in achieving their dreams is the mind-set of inadequacy, holding their gifts in a defective mode.

It is often said that you cannot give what you do not have. I believe that you can also not give what you have but you are holding in a defective mode. This is perhaps one of the reasons why we have able hands but feeble minds.

Until you realise the value of what you have, you cannot appreciate it to the point where it becomes invaluable.

A story of a woman was once told. She lost her husband who was affiliated by work to a great man.

She inherited debt from her late husband and the debtor was about to take hold of her two sons as slaves in lieu of the debt. She seemed helpless about the whole situation as she felt she did not have any means of resolving the issue. She finally decided to seek for help. She approached the great man who she felt could help her, and narrated her ordeal. She started by saying how good a worker her husband was and how she was now in trouble due to the loan the husband left her to service. The great man said to her “I wonder how I can be of help. Tell me, what do you have in your house?”.

Her immediate response was “Nothing”, “Well, I do have a little jar of oil”. Her first response was that she had nothing but on a second thought, she said she had some resources in the form of a jar of oil. She did not however reckon that the jar of oil could be of any help, in other words, she held it in a defective mode.

The great man helped her see the potential in the jar of oil and instructed her on what she should do about it. He taught her how to package it in a useful form and told her to commercialise it. She was able to pay up her debt and also had enough to take care of her family.

In practical terms, relative to career issues, the situation of the woman could be likened to any of the instances below;

- You are a fresh graduate who is currently unemployed or underemployed against your plan and you put all the blame on government for not providing jobs
- An employee who has just been laid off and has no idea what next. You are complaining of how bad you were treated despite your commitment to the organisation and your long years of service.
- You are an employee, you are preoccupied with seeking a greener pasture because your job is like what could be called a nightmare. You complain about your boss, the colleague that is not doing his bit, the bad policy of the organisation, the poor pay etc.
- You have a strong desire to do something different but you don’t know how. You keep identifying everything that is wrong and that will not make you start.
- You live with the thought that your job is soon going to be over because the organisation you work for is not doing well. You consider yourself helpless in this situation and think that you don’t have anything to offer.

What makes the above instances similar to the case of the woman is not just because they are challenges people face, but the helplessness mind-set with which such instances are held like the woman. She thought she had nothing to solve her problem like most people would assume, forgetting that strength actually comes from within, from what we have.

Many unemployed graduates for instance go about with the mind-set that there are no jobs; hence there is nothing they can do about it. They spend years waiting to be called for a job offer or they pick up whatever is available where they end up being miserable with the work conditions.

With some rethinking, the woman realised that she had something, but she never reckoned that what she had was sufficient or good enough to build anything on. She therefore held that which she had in a defective mode.

Isn’t it surprising that the great man she ran to for help asked her what she wanted him to do and what she had in her possession? She had approached the man with a lot of sentiments, expecting to be pitied and probably given a handout to help her pay her debt. But the great man wouldn’t do any of that because he knew that solutions to problems start with the resources we have in our possessions.

The great man was able to help her create a plan to have an edge over her challenges. She never thought about it that way before for some reasons.

1. Her problems were too much of a concern that they were her focus. Though she wanted a solution, but her focus was the problem. When you are confronted with a problem, focus on the solution rather than the problem. What you focus on becomes expanded. You would notice the demonstration of being problem, rather than solution focussed in her response when she was asked the question “what do you have”. Her response was that she had nothing. She later added that she had a little jar of oil, which to her could never have been in any way useful in solving her problem. When you do not think solution, every resource available to help is disparaged. Many unemployed individuals focus on the conditions of unemployment to the extent that they refused to see the potentials they have that are begging to be converted into value which other people can pay for. They hardly see these potentials because they are held in a defective mode the same way the woman held the jar of oil. The focus is usually on the academic certificate that qualifies them to search for a job and when the labour market is not generous with job offers, it is as if nothing else (skills, knowledge, abilities, potentials) matters.

2. Like many people, she believed that she had to be connected to a VIP (Very Important Personality) before her problem can be solved. While there is nothing wrong with being connected to a VIP, they are better disposed to help people who bring some form of resources to the table with which they can be helped. In her own case, she wanted to dump her problems on the great man, hence, she started with some sentimental prefatory, talking about how good the husband was, devoted etc. Did you notice that the great man (the VIP in the story) did not acknowledge all those sentiments? Yes, because he knew the solution to the problem did not lie in those sentiments. His question to her was, what do you have with which I can help you?

The big lesson here is that what you need first is not a VIP or some external influence to solve your career challenges but recognition of what you have and how you can use it effectively and productively. You therefore need to identify what you have that can help you resolve the challenge. Doing this can point you to where to seek help and the type of help you need to seek. In the practice of career counselling, the role of the counsellor is to help the client discover the resources he/she has to resolve whatever challenge that is brought before the counsellor. This is because the solution actually lies within.

3. She never believed she had any resource to help her solve her problem. When the great man asked her what she had that can be used to solve her problem, she said “nothing”. Meanwhile, in the little she had was the solution to her problem. The great man knew that whatever anyone has is a sufficient platform to build on. He decided to help her to have an edge over her problems with what she has by teaching her how to use it properly. Every individual is gifted in specific areas.

A saying goes “the razor blade is sharp but cannot cut a tree; also the axe is strong but cannot shave the hair or cut the nails”, meaning everyone has potentials and the potentials are important according to his/her unique purpose. The major part of the problem I presume is when a razor blade starts to think it is not useful because it cannot cut a tree and an axe starts thinking that a razor blade is better because it cuts nails. Each of these “personality” then assumes a position of defect, discounting the inherent abilities and never able to create and add value fit for their potentials.

4. She was not looking inside out but outside in to solve her problem. By a stroke of inspiration, she had a rethink and said “well, I do have a little jar of oil”. Notice the use of the word “well” in her response. This signifies that though I have this, but what can it do to solve my problem. The challenge with people is that they have skills, potentials, abilities and resources at their disposal but they either hold it in a defective mode or don’t know how to convert it to an edge over their career circumstances.

The totality of her disposition to the problem was defective from the onset but with the wisdom and the guidance of the great man, she got her problem solved. What you actually need to solve your career challenge is to look within you, have a rethink of your current approach to solving the issues and seek for qualified help to do this where appropriate.

5. She did not realise that she needed to create value with what she had no matter how small and look for where she can add the value created. I am intrigued by the story of a lady who was a guest on a radio programme. She worked as a PA to the MD of a company before she resigned and decided to start creating value with ‘her jar of oil’. She said she loves making different types of soup and she used to do that for her friends when she was in the university without charging for it. She considered that a passion and after a spell at a job she was not enjoying, she left to start making soup for people and retail outlets, but this time earning money for her services. Relative to the woman in the story, she could have said she had nothing, however, not only did she realise that she had something, she also converted it into value and she commercialised it. She sounded very enthusiastic with what she was doing and she reeled out some of the plans for expansion and growth in her newly rediscovered passion. For instance, she mentioned that she was starting a learning programme where she will be teaching married women how to make different types of soup. To her, she has created another stream of income, and somehow, she might also be saving some marriages from collapse. The resources in your possession are solutions to the problems of some people, until you identify what those problems are and you package your resources as a solution, you are still in the defective mode.

You have inherent potentials, discover it, package it as value and commercialise it. Stop looking for a solution where it does not exist. Make that decision today to identify the problems you are a solution to.

Source: http://thecareeredge.biz/careerinsights/?p=492

Nice

437 views, and just one comment! Its very unfortunate that educative and motivating threads like this will never enjoy the popularity that they so deserve. Had it been IPOB, drug peddling, skull mining, and other related threads that create platforms for tribal sentiments and online religious hostilities, we would have seen hundreds if not thousands of comments having all the traces of stupidity, ignorance and, ridiculousness. Thanks OP for such wonderful piece. its the best i have read in a while.

Very educative piece, the problem with many is the ability to discover their hidden treasure and develop on it.