Dear Bunmi,
I am in my thirties, married with two adorable children. I come from what you will term a ‘silver spoon’ family and have parents who were, and still are generous to their children.
The problem is our mother. We’ve associated her with a string of boy-friends over the years; the fact that she is now a grandmother hasn’t cramped her style at all.
She has recently been associated with my husband’s uncle and this is causing friction between me and my husband.
His uncle’s wife is spoiling for a showdown and is trying to tar me with the same brush as my mother’s. When I eventually tackled mum about this latest affair of hers, she told me it was none of my business what she did and that I should concentrate more on my marriage.
There is no point involving dad as he’s just recovered from a mild stroke. What is more he’s always turned a blind eye to mum’s philandering. How do I get her off my husband’s uncle?

Source-http://www.vanguardngr.com/2015/12/my-mums-affairs-embarrass-me/

the mother gave the only plausible and mature answer here, and i strongly suggest to follow it:

Fabrolistic:
she told me it was none of my business what she did and that I should concentrate more on my marriage.

Tell ur mum to be moderate in her activities as no one is free of crime or deviation.

She told me it was none of my business what she did and that I should concentrate more on my marriage.
How will you say that's a matured answer, it's so deafening . It's even the mother that needs to be told to mind her business cos her act is already affecting her daughter's marriage. I'm sure if the mother is not eating her rotten food from within,the op might not have come here to raise alarm and ask for advice.
My 5cent is just for you to report your mum to some elders in the family, since you said ur dad is already unconcerned and he can't even be bothered due to his health. Involved some elders and pray to your God about it. The act is not just beginning for your mum, it's something she has been into since her young days,so it can't be dropped just like dat.
But na wa for that your husband's uncle o, they all need prayers

This is a serious case. The mother is already an elder so there is no point reporting her to elders. She is already a grand-mother.

She is your mum and she has a right to do whatever she wants, but make her understand that the relationship she has with your husband's uncle concerns you and they would not have met if not for you. So you are also involved and you do not want to have more problems with your husband's people. I am not exonerating your husband's uncle from any wrong but I believe you can talk to your mum more.

Let her know what she is doing is embarrassing to you and it will certainly affect your relationship with her. Report her to your siblings as well and let her know that she is now an elder who should be an example to the younger ones.

The mom gave the best answer : none of your damn business.

You can decide how to live your life but what will you do to your mom, a grandmother ? Virtually nothing else you just might end up with a mild stroke, just like the dad( sorry but that's true) .

Your mom has made her choices, let her live with it and deal with the consequences. Your job is to your husbsnd and dad, let your in-laws take it up with your mom, don't get involved. finito!

MRBrownJ:
the mother gave the only plausible and mature answer here, and i strongly suggest to follow it:

are you for real? And you failed to understand her marriage already. The husband is now scared his wife might take after the mum.

Well, opinion differ as people do.

ifyalways:


Your mom has made her choices, let her live with it and deal with the consequences.

but the lady in question is now bearing the consequence and not the mother....

The funny thing is if u tell ppl say ur mama dey dabaru ur marriage, dem go say shut up, how u go dey talk bad thing abt d person weh carry u for womb for 9months. Make una see now how mama weh born person dey constitute problem to her pikin.

Does she not have snrs that she can listen to in d family? Maybe u shd tell someone that she can listen to. Or tell ur siblings..I believe they are reasonable and upright too, u ppl shd co-operate and object against ur mother's flattering. When u gang up against her actions, fear go catch her.

Fabrolistic:

are you for real? And you failed to understand her marriage already. The husband is now scared his wife might take after the mum.

Well, opinion differ as people do.

nonsense.... what the mother does has absolutely NOTHING to do with how a spouse would act, especially if that spouse believes that what her mother does is wrong (in her own opinion). furthermore, if the husband is already married and his wife is great, then why would he think that his wife would suddenly change simply because of her mother's actions?

Errrrr....

^{face your own marriage ooo... if you can, dissociate from your ma since she's not a good influence. it doesn't matter where it comes from but bad company affects good manners.}

Fabrolistic:

but the lady in question is now bearing the consequence and not the mother....

Which consequence ? She got herself involved.

Let her tell her in-laws to face her mom directly. What else would you have her do? Fight her mom, over what? Would it make her change or stop?

I can't stop loving any member of my family!!! I will only offer advisory when necessary but any one that gets him/her self in trouble, any grown adult, would face the consequences but that won't stop me from loving him or her.

ifyalways:

Which consequence ? She got herself involved.

Let her tell her in-laws to face her mom directly. What else would you suggest she does? Fight her mom, over what? Would it make her change or stop?

I can't stop loving any member of my family!!! I will only offer advisory when necessary but any one that gets him/her self in trouble, any grown adult, would face the consequences but that won't stop me from loving him or her.

the problem now is that, her hubby now having a mixed feelings towards her. That she might take after her mum.

Ify, okwu a aburokwa okwu umu-aka.