Salaam Alaekum Waramatullah Wabarakatuh. Please Detailed and Surgical Explanations Needed.Its So Bad, Some Muslim Sisters Hate It,Talkless Of Practicing It.
Is This Normal?What Are The Conditions For A Second Wife? Why Do Our Muslim Sisters Abhor It So Much?
Deols,
Dragnet
Mukina
Deathstroke007
Tbaba
maclatunji
Babylolaroy

GAZZUZZ:
eherbal, you are still harboring this thought? I will report you

personally my guy,its the best alternative to cheating.you know,legal sex

eherbal:
Salaam Alaekum Waramatullah Wabarakatuh. Please Detailed and Surgical Explanations Needed.Its So Bad, Some Muslim Sisters Hate It,Talkless Of Practicing It.
Is This Normal?What Are The Conditions For A Second Wife? Why Do Our Muslim Sisters Abhor It So Much?
Deols,
Dragnet
Mukina
Deathstroke007
Tbaba
maclatunji
Babylolaroy

Walaykum salam warahmatullahi wabarakatuhu.. .





Marrying second wife or more than 3 is allowed in Islam.. Under some certain conditions... All I can say is, before you can marry second wife, you must have satisfy the 1st wife to the fullest.. To the extent that she won't ever complain of you marrying another... Besides, marrying more than one is stated for the sake of abrogation of zina... .

But in nigeria,some muslim men use it to checkmate their wifes excesses or to spite them.some men see it as a kind of trophy collection or competition.the fuji crooner,ayinde barrister,a muslim,reportedly married over 10 women. What couldve informed such excess.could it be lack of knowledge bordering of the subject matter,which even schooled peeps in muslim section have refused to lend a voice to the discuss,save for deathstroke007.
I posted this topic over 7hrs ago. Funny enough, peeps i mentioned just viewed and left.especially the sisters .discussing death and fornication is easier on this section,than the second wife

DeathStroke007:
why is it a taboo?why?







Walaykum salam warahmatullahi wabarakatuhu.. .





Marrying second wife or more than 3 is allowed in Islam.. Under some certain conditions... All I can say is, before you can marry second wife, you must have satisfy the 1st wife to the fullest.. To the extent that she won't ever complain of you marrying another... Besides, marrying more than one is stated for the sake of abrogation of zina... .

Wa alaykum salam wa rahmatullah wa baaraakatuh

Even though marrying more than one wife is Sunnah but that doesn't mean everybody must practice it.

There are some conditions of marrying more than one wife, which are as follows:
1. You must be JUST
2. You must be financially capable
3. You must be physically capable

How many men of nowadays have the ability to meet the above conditions? Are you even JUST with one wife before considering the second one?

It's disheartening to note that some men now use an excuse of Sunnah to engage in mathna whereas most of them are not capable and can't be just, or how can you explain the situation of marrying two wives inside room and parlour?

It's better we concentrate more on other Sunnah rather than mathna. Let's leave mathna to those who are capable and can be just.

Mathna is not for everybody..


"And if you fear that you will not deal justly with the orphan girls, then marry those that please you of [other] women, two or three or four. But if you fear that you will not be just, then [marry only] one or those your right hand possesses. That is more suitable that you may not incline [to injustice]".

Surat An-Nisa, Quran 4 : 3

eherbal:
personally my guy,its the best alternative to cheating.you know,legal sex

Actually, second wife is not an alternative to cheating. With or without foyt wives, you will still continue to desire other women if your sole reason was to curb cheating.


Why is that you abandon rational reasoning when it comes to polygamy?

Wizeboy:
Wa alaykum salam wa rahmatullah wa baaraakatuh

Even though marrying more than one wife is Sunnah but that doesn't mean everybody must practice it.

There are some conditions of marrying more than one wife, which are as follows:
1. You must be JUST
2. You must be financially capable
3. You must be physically capable

How many men of nowadays have the ability to meet the above conditions? Are you even JUST with one wife before considering the second one?

It's disheartening to note that some men now use an excuse of Sunnah to engage in mathna whereas most of them are not capable and can't be just, or how can you explain the situation of marrying two wives inside room and parlour?

It's better we concentrate more on other Sunnah rather than mathna. Let's leave mathna to those who are capable and can be just.

Mathna is not for everybody..


"And if you fear that you will not deal justly with the orphan girls, then marry those that please you of [other] women, two or three or four. But if you fear that you will not be just, then [marry only] one or those your right hand possesses. That is more suitable that you may not incline [to injustice]".

Surat An-Nisa, Quran 4 : 3

Can you please enlighten me how someone like Sanusi can be physically capable with the number of wives he has got and his responsibilities as an Emir?

Don't you think he would be committing a sin if he can't meet up with his physical obligations?

Do you think it would be proper for him to give excuses upon excuses because he is tired or has to be with another wife at the detriment of the physical obligation of another wide?

Do you think that would be tenable before Allah and common sense?

eherbal:
But in nigeria,some muslim men use it to checkmate their wifes excesses or to spite them.some men see it as a kind of trophy collection or competition.the fuji crooner,ayinde barrister,a muslim,reportedly married over 10 women. What couldve informed such excess.could it be lack of knowledge bordering of the subject matter,which even schooled peeps in muslim section have refused to lend a voice to the discuss,save for deathstroke007.
I posted this topic over 7hrs ago. Funny enough, peeps i mentioned just viewed and left.especially the sisters .discussing death and fornication is easier on this section,than the second wife

What excesses? So far all the polygamous homes I know, I am yet to see any changes concerning the first wife's character. I would have loved to cite many homes including the ones influential in our circle but I can't.

I am sorry this might sound insulting but I think whoever came up with that excuse must be devoid of rational reasoning. It does not follow at all.


Selfish men need to come up with better excuses, those I have seen so far are nauseating.

daretodiffer:


Can you please enlighten me how someone like Sanusi can be physically capable with the number of wives he has got and his responsibilities as an Emir?

Islam permitted a man to marry between two and four wives once he knows he will be able to treat them fairly.

Islam requires the man who has more than one wife to treat his wives equally and fairly. 

What is meant by that is fairness with regard to spending the night, accommodation, spending and clothing. 

What is meant by fairness in spending the night is that he should divide his time equally among his wives, so if he spends one or two nights with the first, he must spend the same amount of time with each of his wives. 

That's the conditions Islam stated for marrying more than one wife.

I cannot however, confirm whether Sanusi is capable of satisfying his wives or not because I don't know him personally. I am sure he understands the conditions for marrying more than one wife and he feels he can be fair among them. If not, then let Almighty Allah judge him accordingly.

Don't you think he would be committing a sin if he can't meet up with his physical obligations?

Allaah has enjoined justice and fairness between co-wives, and there is a warning against wronging one of them at the expense of another. Allaah says in the Holy Quran: 

“And if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly with the orphan girls then marry (other) women of your choice, two or three, or four; but if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly (with them), then only one or (slaves) that your right hands possess. That is nearer to prevent you from doing injustice”

[al-Nisa’ 4:3] 


If he's unable to treat his wives equally, then he's committing sin.

Do you think it would be proper for him to give excuses upon excuses because he is tired or has to be with another wife at the detriment of the physical obligation of another wide?

Do you think that would be tenable before Allah and common sense?

It was narrated from Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Whoever has two wives and favours one of them over the other, will come on the Day of Resurrection with one of his sides leaning.” Narrated by al-Tirmidhi (1141), Abu Dawood (2133), al-Nasaa’i (3942) and Ibn Majaah (1969). Classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Targheeb wa’l-Tarheeb (no. 1949). 

It was narrated from Abu Dharr (may Allaah be pleased with him) that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said, narrating from Allaah, may He be glorified and exalted: “ ‘O My slaves, I have forbidden zulm to Myself and I have made it haraam among you, so do not wrong one another.” Narrated by Muslim (2577). 


Finally, how are you so sure Sanusi will not be able to be fair/just among his wives? Even if he's not, let Almighty Allah be the judge.

Wallahu Alam

Wizeboy:


Islam permitted a man to marry between two and four wives once he knows he will be able to treat them fairly.

Islam requires the man who has more than one wife to treat his wives equally and fairly. 

What is meant by that is fairness with regard to spending the night, accommodation, spending and clothing. 

What is meant by fairness in spending the night is that he should divide his time equally among his wives, so if he spends one or two nights with the first, he must spend the same amount of time with each of his wives. 

That's the conditions Islam stated for marrying more than one wife.

I cannot however, confirm whether Sanusi is capable of satisfying his wives or not because I don't know him personally. I am sure he understands the conditions for marrying more than one wife and he feels he can be fair among them. If not, then let Almighty Allah judge him accordingly.





Allaah has enjoined justice and fairness between co-wives, and there is a warning against wronging one of them at the expense of another. Allaah says in the Holy Quran: 

“And if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly with the orphan girls then marry (other) women of your choice, two or three, or four; but if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly (with them), then only one or (slaves) that your right hands possess. That is nearer to prevent you from doing injustice”

[al-Nisa’ 4:3] 


If he's unable to treat his wives equally, then he's committing sin.




It was narrated from Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Whoever has two wives and favours one of them over the other, will come on the Day of Resurrection with one of his sides leaning.” Narrated by al-Tirmidhi (1141), Abu Dawood (2133), al-Nasaa’i (3942) and Ibn Majaah (1969). Classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Targheeb wa’l-Tarheeb (no. 1949). 

It was narrated from Abu Dharr (may Allaah be pleased with him) that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said, narrating from Allaah, may He be glorified and exalted: “ ‘O My slaves, I have forbidden zulm to Myself and I have made it haraam among you, so do not wrong one another.” Narrated by Muslim (2577). 


Finally, how are you so sure Sanusi will not be able to be fair/just among his wives? Even if he's not, let Almighty Allah be the judge.

Wallahu Alam

I wasn't talking about fairness but I will like to explore it


Coitus to my knowledge is a demanding exercise and like all demanding activities, the law of diminishing returns will apply. A man like Sanusi definitely have a lots on his plate, now add his physical obligations to his wives. There is no way on earth he would be able to fulfill those physical obligations equally regardless of the equal time he spends with them. There are days he would feel more energetic and days he wouldn't. At the end of the day, it will appear that some wives will definitely get the better end of the stick than other wives. Would you consider that fairness on his part? The same logic applies to all men including your average teacher, plumber, politician, unemployed husband etc Just because you are a man does not mean that you can afford to have satisfy your wives obligations every freaking time. A man could satisfy his first wife in a week but fails to meet up to the second's wife expectation the second week. The truth is the law of diminishing returns applies everywhere even in the bedroom so regardless you will be unfair to some of your wives.


Talking about fairness. We both know that coitus is a right in islam and a rewarding activity at that. Sexual energy differs from one person to another. If the first wife has a lower libido in comparison to the second wife. Would you still advocate for equal time between both wives and tell the second wife that she does not have a right to enjoy herself physically in her marriage? or would you divide your time to reflect such differences bearing in mind that relationship/marriage is not all about coitus?

What would you consider fair and just in that situation?


Another example is the case of an anxious woman. Some people need to talk to get it off or use some drugs. We both know that the drugg alternative is not the best idea. considering that she finally gets married. We will expect her to talk to her husband most times she is anxious and reach for the drugs when he is not around for the good of their (both) marriage
but when he decides to have another wife, it follows that he would be spending some time with another woman, the time he would have have spent with her if they were just the two of them. And this time he is not away for their good but for his own good. How would you expect such woman to view her marriage? Personally, I think it has defeated the purpose of marriage on her own part because the companionship isn't has solid as it used to be, she would return to popping drugs which is clearly not the best idea for a healthy living. What do you think would be fair and just in that situation.


All my questions are base don the premise that polygamy is NOT and obligation

daretodiffer:


I wasn't talking about fairness but I will like to explore it


Coitus to my knowledge is a demanding exercise and like all demanding activities, the law of diminishing returns will apply. A man like Sanusi definitely have a lots on his plate, now add his physical obligations to his wives. There is no way on earth he would be able to fulfill those physical obligations equally regardless of the equal time he spends with them. There are days he would feel more energetic and days he wouldn't. At the end of the day, it will appear that some wives will definitely get the better end of the stick than other wives. Would you consider that fairness on his part? The same logic applies to all men including your average teacher, plumber, politician, unemployed husband etc Just because you are a man does not mean that you can afford to have satisfy your wives obligations every freaking time. A man could satisfy his first wife in a week but fails to meet up to the second's wife expectation the second week. The truth is the law of diminishing returns applies everywhere even in the bedroom so regardless you will be unfair to some of your wives.


Talking about fairness. We both know that coitus is a right in islam and a rewarding activity at that. Sexual energy differs from one person to another. If the first wife has a lower libido in comparison to the second wife. Would you still advocate for equal time between both wives and tell the second wife that she does not have a right to enjoy herself physically in her marriage? or would you divide your time to reflect such differences bearing in mind that relationship/marriage is not all about coitus?

What would you consider fair and just in that situation?


Another example is the case of an anxious woman. Some people need to talk to get it off or use some drugs. We both know that the drugg alternative is not the best idea. considering that she finally gets married. We will expect her to talk to her husband most times she is anxious and reach for the drugs when he is not around for the good of their (both) marriage
but when he decides to have another wife, it follows that he would be spending some time with another woman, the time he would have have spent with her if they were just the two of them. And this time he is not away for their good but for his own good. How would you expect such woman to view her marriage? Personally, I think it has defeated the purpose of marriage on her own part because the companionship isn't has solid as it used to be, she would return to popping drugs which is clearly not the best idea for a healthy living. What do you think would be fair and just in that situation.


All my questions are base don the premise that polygamy is NOT and obligation

Nobody is preaching that polygamy is compulsory in Islam, we all know is Sunnah which can only be practice by any man who feel he's capable.

You don't judge people by your mere assumption that they won't be able to satisfy their wives, because you are not in their shoes... even if the man is unable to be fair among his wives, leave the judgement for Almighty Allah.

As a muslim, you don't frown or condemn Almighty Allah command no matter how unfavourable it is to you because we are not wise as Almighty Allah Himself.

No matter how bad you painted mathna, it have some of its benefits as well... that doesn't however mean those who will not be able to be JUST should jump into it.

On a lighter note, I hope you are not one of Sanusi wives the way and manner you are using the man as an example here is suspicious

Almighty Allah will continue to guide and strengthen us toward the right path and make us die as a better muslim.

Wizeboy:


Nobody is preaching that polygamy is compulsory in Islam, we all know is Sunnah which can only be practice by any man who feel he's capable.

You don't judge people by your mere assumption that they won't be able to satisfy their wives, because you are not in their shoes... even if the man is unable to be fair among his wives, leave the judgement for Almighty Allah.

As a muslim, you don't frown or condemn Almighty Allah command no matter how unfavourable it is to you because we are not wise as Almighty Allah Himself.

No matter how bad you painted mathna, it have some of its benefits as well... that doesn't however mean those who will not be able to be JUST should jump into it.

On a lighter note, I hope you are not one of Sanusi wives the way and manner you are using the man as an example here is suspicious

Almighty Allah will continue to guide and strengthen us toward the right path and make us die as a better muslim.

You are missing the point again

Just because I feel like jumping off a 3 storey building doe snot mean that I should jump.

Mathna is permitted but not compulsory and it requires such burden that an average man cannot fulfill!!!

I am neither frowning at it nor judging people who do it. I am actually thinking and questioning their sanity

Wizeboy:


Nobody is preaching that polygamy is compulsory in Islam, we all know is Sunnah which can only be practice by any man who feel he's capable.

You don't judge people by your mere assumption that they won't be able to satisfy their wives, because you are not in their shoes... even if the man is unable to be fair among his wives, leave the judgement for Almighty Allah.

As a muslim, you don't frown or condemn Almighty Allah command no matter how unfavourable it is to you because we are not wise as Almighty Allah Himself.

No matter how bad you painted mathna, it have some of its benefits as well... that doesn't however mean those who will not be able to be JUST should jump into it.

On a lighter note, I hope you are not one of Sanusi wives the way and manner you are using the man as an example here is suspicious

Almighty Allah will continue to guide and strengthen us toward the right path and make us die as a better muslim.

My question should have been:

Am I obliged to make sacrifices for my husband lone actions? Which is clearly of little or no or intangible benefit to me?

daretodiffer:


You are missing the point again

Just because I feel like jumping off a 3 storey building doe snot mean that I should jump.

Mathna is permitted but not compulsory and it requires such burden that an average man cannot fulfill!!!

I am neither frowning at it nor judging people who do it. I am actually thinking and questioning their sanity

We are not saying the same thing here?

I doubt if you even read what I have been posting on the topic.

I made it clear that it's Sunnah and it's for those you can satisfy the conditions only...

I am not however in a position to condemn anybody who engage in it because I can't truly know the situations of his family or how capable he is... It's always better to leave judgement for Almighty Allah the All Knower and All seer.

Wizeboy:


Nobody is preaching that polygamy is compulsory in Islam, we all know is Sunnah which can only be practice by any man who feel he's capable.

You don't judge people by your mere assumption that they won't be able to satisfy their wives, because you are not in their shoes... even if the man is unable to be fair among his wives, leave the judgement for Almighty Allah.

As a muslim, you don't frown or condemn Almighty Allah command no matter how unfavourable it is to you because we are not wise as Almighty Allah Himself.

No matter how bad you painted mathna, it have some of its benefits as well... that doesn't however mean those who will not be able to be JUST should jump into it.

On a lighter note, I hope you are not one of Sanusi wives the way and manner you are using the man as an example here is suspicious

Almighty Allah will continue to guide and strengthen us toward the right path and make us die as a better muslim.

Point of correction, polygamy is not a command of Allah, it's a mere permission, when u call something a command it must be followed, and going by the verses and context in wc the polygamy verses were , it is obvious polygamy is not encouraged in Islam but merely permissible with serious requirements and obligations attached wc sadly many men take for granted.


When I hear some men say they want to do sunnah by marrying more wives, I call them hypocrites cos some don't even perform the obligatory aspect of Islam talk more a 'sunnah'. Many don't follow the guidelines as regards polygamy, the do what they like forgetting they'll meet their Lord one day and all their actions will be duly accounted for. Polygamy is a huge risk on a man's account, cos tht might be his undoing, if he is not able to do justice. A man who doesn't treat his wives wt justice will appear on the day of judgement wt a side paralysed and tht is just the beginning, who knows what he'll go thru in the grave and his judgement?

Some men can't even effectively manage just one woman yet they'll also dabbled into polygamy probably for the experience of having sex wt different women, I wld''t know. Some men av even abused the permissibility of polygamy by marrying a set of 4 women then divorce one or 2 or all, then marry another set. Can u imagine?

HaneefahRN:

Point of correction, polygamy is not a command of Allah, it's a mere permission, when u call something a command it must be followed, and going by the verses and context in wc the polygamy verses were , it is obvious polygamy is not encouraged in Islam but merely permissible with serious requirements and obligations attached wc sadly many men take for granted.


When I hear some men say they want to do sunnah by marrying more wives, I call them hypocrites cos some don't even perform the obligatory aspect of Islam talk more a 'sunnah'. Many don't follow the guidelines as regards polygamy, the do what they like forgetting they'll meet their Lord one day and all their actions will be duly accounted for. Polygamy is a huge risk on a man's account, cos tht might be his undoing, if he is not able to do justice. A man who doesn't treat his wives wt justice will appear on the day of judgement wt a side paralysed and tht is just the beginning, who knows what he'll go thru in the grave and his judgement?

Some men can't even effectively manage just one woman yet they'll also dabbled into polygamy probably for the experience of having sex wt different women, I wld''t know. Some men av even abused the permissibility of polygamy by marrying a set of 4 women then divorce one or 2 or all, then marry another set. Can u imagine?

You are right about some men not capable of mathna and are just dabbling into it for pleasure or other unnecessary things.

There are conditions in Islam in which one can divorce wife or husband... A true muslim can't just wake up one day and divorce.

Like I said earlier, anybody who go into mathna without been just/fair or have the capability will surely give account of his actions to Almighty Allah. Almighty Allah has stated the conditions clearly and unambiguously, is now left for whoever want to engage in mathna to follow strictly.

Almighty Allah will continue to guide us toward the right path

HaneefahRN:

Point of correction, polygamy is not a command of Allah, it's a mere permission, when u call something a command it must be followed, and going by the verses and context in wc the polygamy verses were , it is obvious polygamy is not encouraged in Islam but merely permissible with serious requirements and obligations attached wc sadly many men take for granted.


When I hear some men say they want to do sunnah by marrying more wives, I call them hypocrites cos some don't even perform the obligatory aspect of Islam talk more a 'sunnah'. Many don't follow the guidelines as regards polygamy, the do what they like forgetting they'll meet their Lord one day and all their actions will be duly accounted for. Polygamy is a huge risk on a man's account, cos tht might be his undoing, if he is not able to do justice. A man who doesn't treat his wives wt justice will appear on the day of judgement wt a side paralysed and tht is just the beginning, who knows what he'll go thru in the grave and his judgement?

Some men can't even effectively manage just one woman yet they'll also dabbled into polygamy probably for the experience of having sex wt different women, I wld''t know. Some men av even abused the permissibility of polygamy by marrying a set of 4 women then divorce one or 2 or all, then marry another set. Can u imagine?

Wow. Can you imagine sis

Islam is for the wise and not the egotistical mind.

Nubian113:


Wow. Can you imagine sis

Islam is for the wise and not the egotistical mind.

You are so right. But Allah knows why He made us all wt differing characters both gud and bad

For the females who argue matters like this based on emotions, please stop it.Islam is not a religion of opinion,whims or what you feel.
It's a great sin to argue against something that's permissible according to the Qur'an and Sunnah

The salaf used to speak harshly against people who do this

Wizeboy:



You are right about some men not capable of mathna and are just dabbling into it for pleasure or other unnecessary things.

There are conditions in Islam in which one can divorce wife or husband... A true muslim can't just wake up one day and divorce.

Like I said earlier, anybody who go into mathna without been just/fair or have the capability will surely give account of his actions to Almighty Allah. Almighty Allah has stated the conditions clearly and unambiguously, is now left for whoever want to engage in mathna to follow strictly.

Almighty Allah will continue to guide us toward the right path

Nice points

Aamin

Wizeboy:



You are right about some men not capable of mathna and are just dabbling into it for pleasure or other unnecessary things.

There are conditions in Islam in which one can divorce wife or husband... A true muslim can't just wake up one day and divorce.

Like I said earlier, anybody who go into mathna without been just/fair or have the capability will surely give account of his actions to Almighty Allah. Almighty Allah has stated the conditions clearly and unambiguously, is now left for whoever want to engage in mathna to follow strictly.

Almighty Allah will continue to guide us toward the right path

The people that go give account ehn

For myself one wife brings me happiness. I'm more then content.

daretodiffer:


Actually, second wife is not an alternative to cheating. With or without foyt wives, you will still continue to desire other women if your sole reason was to curb cheating.


Why is that you abandon rational reasoning when it comes to polygamy?

daretodiffer:


Actually, second wife is not an alternative to cheating. With or without foyt wives, you will still continue to desire other women if your sole reason was to curb cheating.


Why is that you abandon rational reasoning when it comes to polygamy?

Salaam Alaekum Waramatullah Wabarakatuh. I want to disagree with you ma'am. Moraly and spiritually speaking,taking a second wife will hold resonable ground against cheating. It takes Zina away from the count sheet.so many muslim brothers comiting adultery because of stigmatisation attached to polygamy.
Apart from spiked libido in our men,we have female population explosion world over . The ratio of women to men in Nigeria alone is an estimated 7/3. quite frightening I'D say. who's gonna marry the deficit? Not fellow sisters ofcourse!
Muslim women going against prescriptions of the All Knowing,All Wise,beats me. Could it be that they accept only injuctions thats Suits them, casting others away, because they cant stand the competition??most of them are abysmal failures when it comes to obeying their husbands and keeping within the limits.
I've heard Muslim sisters and also read about an ibo lady not minding to be a second wife,as long as their husband is fair to them.
Are you in any way Better than this school of thought ,or you're just being rebellious and selfish? So many muslim sisters are spinsters at an old age because they cant play second fiddle.They have themselves to blame.Some go as far as marrying christian brethren ,just to cover their shame.
Its about time we start coming out to address this elusive issue once and for all. we cant be in the dark on issues bordering on our faith .
no excuses,no sitting on the wall.
Ma Salaam

daretodiffer:


The people that go give account ehn

you inclusive,for being judgemental

eherbal:

Salaam Alaekum Waramatullah Wabarakatuh. I want to disagree with you ma'am. Moraly and spiritually speaking,taking a second wife will hold resonable ground against cheating. It takes Zina away from the count sheet.so many muslim brothers comiting adultery because of stigmatisation attached to polygamy.
Apart from spiked libido in our men,we have female population explosion world over . The ratio of women to men in Nigeria alone is an estimated 7/3. quite frightening I'D say. who's gonna marry the deficit? Not fellow sisters ofcourse!
Muslim women going against prescriptions of the All Knowing,All Wise,beats me. Could it be that they accept only injuctions thats Suits them, casting others away, because they cant stand the competition??most of them are abysmal failures when it comes to obeying their husbands and keeping within the limits.
I've heard Muslim sisters and also read about an ibo lady not minding to be a second wife,as long as their husband is fair to them.
Are you in any way Better than this school of thought ,or you're just being rebellious and selfish? So many muslim sisters are spinsters at an old age because they cant play second fiddle.They have themselves to blame.Some go as far as marrying christian brethren ,just to cover their shame.
Its about time we start coming out to address this elusive issue once and for all. we cant be in the dark on issues bordering on our faith .
no excuses,no sitting on the wall.
Ma Salaam

Muslim women going against hijab and solat beats me but muslim women going against polygamy does not beat me..

It is permitted not compulsory therefore you cannot claim that I am going against anything or that my faith is not as strong as it should be.

How many muslim women spinsters are out there sef? I grew up in a muslim community so I well aware of what is going on. You cannot come and tell what it isn't the case. Furthermore, most men that engage in Mathna rarely married this old spinsters and widows rather they go for a young muslimah who already has several bachelors lined up.

Mathna does not address cheating. I am a muslim lady that is very close to her father. And I know what it is and what it isn't. It is human nature to admire other people other than your partner. A man that marries a woman because he admires her will definitely admire several other women, not one, not two, not three, not four, not five, not six, not even seven. It is basic rational reasoning. There are many attractive, civil and spiritually sound women out there. Men that cheat, do so because of lust. You cannot confine lust! And sooner or later they move on to the next one. Therefore I am going to strongly disagree on that basis. There are too many attractive women on earth to tell me that you are getting married to another women because you do not want to cheat. I as a woman will not accept that!!!

It could however address the issue of higher libido if the wife's isn't at par with her husband but then that is also subjective(I will go into it if you want me to)


The reasons there are disparities between our population has a lot to do with standard of living and the fact that more men are waiting till their late 20's and early 30s to get married (thanks to education). However in an Islamic community where early marriage is enjoined for both man and woman.m, rhe only reason for such disparity would be standard of living. In case you do not know, the world produce almost an equal number of boys and girls every year.

eherbal:
you inclusive,for being judgemental

Judgemental or rational


Hehhehhe

I was merely asking questions o. Was it because I considered every probable scenarios?

Fear don dey catch you

daretodiffer:


Judgemental or rational


Hehhehhe

I was merely asking questions o. Was it because I considered every probable scenarios?

Fear don dey catch you

lol.ill let that pass .Fear ko,Afraid ni

eherbal:
lol.ill let that pass .Fear ko,Afraid ni

Talk true

daretodiffer:


Talk true

say fowl cross road or wetin

eherbal:
Salaam Alaekum Waramatullah Wabarakatuh. Please Detailed and Surgical Explanations Needed.Its So Bad, Some Muslim Sisters Hate It,Talkless Of Practicing It.
Is This Normal?What Are The Conditions For A Second Wife? Why Do Our Muslim Sisters Abhor It So Much?
Deols,
Dragnet
Mukina
Deathstroke007
Tbaba
maclatunji
Babylolaroy

of course, why one woman will hate it will be different from why another will hate it. some women....religion aside...cant share anything, husband or not. besides its not exactly 100% palatable to know your husband shares his love for you, time and even bed with another. its hard buh with iman, one can come to not worry much...SAMI'NA WA ATA'NA....thats d scope


lastly he doesnt even av to share love...with the right character, Aisha rodiyaAllahu anha was the most beloved to the prophet and he loved others too....i believe we can co-exist when we view our patience as ibaadah

eherbal:
Salaam Alaekum Waramatullah Wabarakatuh. Please Detailed and Surgical Explanations Needed.Its So Bad, Some Muslim Sisters Hate It,Talkless Of Practicing It.
Is This Normal?What Are The Conditions For A Second Wife? Why Do Our Muslim Sisters Abhor It So Much?
Deols,
Dragnet
Mukina
Deathstroke007
Tbaba
maclatunji
Babylolaroy

Allah said in glorious Quran, Marry more than one wife IF you can do justice between them or marry just One...


My question to you is, can we be just?


Only Allah is just..



that's from Quran..


Form logical aspect, due to zina, population explosion of women... we can marry more than one ONLY if we are just with the only one, then we can marry more..



as long as your reasons for marrying more than one is just and you trying your best between them by following the teachings of Prophet Muhammad (saw).. All is well..





both is sunnah.. Marrying One and marrying more than one...







In Sha Allah, I will marry just One.. I can't be just.. I prefer staying on better side.. marrying just One.. it might be one's unjustness among the wives that will make one enter hell fire....












the point is, make sure your reason for marrying more than one JUST.






ALLAH KNOWS BEST