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I Wanna Be Single Cos Am Gamophobic, Is It A Big Issue? (2) (3) (4)

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Are You Gamophobic? by safarigirl(f): 4:22pm On Jan 29, 2016
I was sitting next to this family in church some weeks ago and I watched how the husband and wife interacted with each other and their child, while I did this, one thought occurred to me; I don't particularly care for that sort of interaction.


Gamophobia simply implies a fear of marriage/commitment, now while I may not specifically say I'm gamophobic, I do acknowledge that I'm apathetic towards such things. I speak enough about it and make jokes on relationships, but I don't feel this need to be in one.

I don't feel like I'm missing out on anything, I find some relationships ridiculous and laughable and I have a life plan of adopting a kid at thirty in the event that I haven't trapped some pour soul by then (which I don't plan to).

Many people probably feel like I do about relationships; can't stay in one, don't see the need for one, won't engage in one if given the chance. This is particularly rampant amongst intellectuals, narcissists, workaholics and the likes.


I don't love myself that much (couldn't give a rat's behind honestly), I may not be the easiest person to deal with, so I would rather keep my drama to myself, I would rather not meet other people, but when I do, I get lively and animated. I'm shy and would say that I suffer some form of low self esteem issues (even my late mother couldn't talk me out of it).....generally, I haven't felt the need to be in a relationship or seen myself in one.


Does anyone else feel same? Or has anyone felt same and gotten over it? I don't think I ever will

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Re: Are You Gamophobic? by Nobody: 4:26pm On Jan 29, 2016
nikola tesla never married.

neither did jesus.

neither did newton.

so I guess you have a lot of role models. grin

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: Are You Gamophobic? by missingrib(f): 4:29pm On Jan 29, 2016
ur life ur choice.....
Re: Are You Gamophobic? by Mhizkel(f): 4:30pm On Jan 29, 2016
I once felt same, but it's all over now.
Re: Are You Gamophobic? by wtfCode: 4:36pm On Jan 29, 2016
undecided

1 Like

Re: Are You Gamophobic? by gabinogem(m): 4:38pm On Jan 29, 2016
When u talk-out ur fears, it has a soothing feelings that comes with it. I don't think u are gamophobic though, since u can relate freely about it. Most people find themselves suffering from the fear of the unknown... some see it as a spiritual problem.
Re: Are You Gamophobic? by safarigirl(f): 4:40pm On Jan 29, 2016
Teempakguy:
nikola tesla never married.
neither did jesus.
neither did newton.
so I guess you have a lot of role models. grin
exemplary ones
Re: Are You Gamophobic? by safarigirl(f): 4:40pm On Jan 29, 2016
Double Post


Land For Sale
Re: Are You Gamophobic? by Cestmoi1(f): 4:42pm On Jan 29, 2016
I can say i am to a large extent but i still believe in love. I 'd like to have my own kids but not out of wedlock.So,the earlier the better......to get rid of the fear.
Re: Are You Gamophobic? by robosky02(m): 4:44pm On Jan 29, 2016
how much lol
safarigirl:
Double Post


Land For Sale

1 Like

Re: Are You Gamophobic? by safarigirl(f): 4:51pm On Jan 29, 2016
Cestmoi1:
I can say i am to a large extent but i still believe in love. I 'd like to have my own kids but not out of wedlock.So,the earlier the better......to get rid of the fear.
I don't believe in love....at least not in an African setting, I do not think the black race capable of expression of love, maybe they do love, but they certainly suck at expression.

I believe solely in the ideals of mutual trust and tolerance, those are the things that cement relationships, love is like starch; sprinkle some water on it and it weakens.

@robosky, anything you bring, we go manage smiley

2 Likes

Re: Are You Gamophobic? by tubouncen(m): 5:13pm On Jan 29, 2016
Na only women and the guys' parent dey rush... Marriage is nt guy's thing... That's why we take our time
Re: Are You Gamophobic? by Nobody: 5:55pm On Jan 29, 2016
Just stop overthinking everything.

Thats one problem with people like you, you're not really gamophobic or anything, it's just in your mind
The mind is a powerful tool, you keep telling yourself you wont fit right in a relationship and your body will follow, you sub conciousness will project that thought and it becomes a reality, change your perception, change how you view reality. You probably have a powerful mind thats why you don't see the relevance of normie (normal) activities like relationships etc. cause your mind is too busy with esoteric stuff.

You think you're not easy to deal with? Lmao
I used to think relationships where boring and pointless until i let myself loose and experienced the other side of life
Lo and behold it was beautiful as i had fallen for an angel in humanoid form. She made all my dramma look like nothing, Even though we broke up, i still don't regret anything.

Tl:DR: my point is don't just assume you're gamophobic until you've actually found that one person that can awaken your inner beast, There is soo much to life and so little time, so make the best of it, alright?

7 Likes 1 Share

Re: Are You Gamophobic? by TheSuperNerd(m): 5:55pm On Jan 29, 2016
Hi Safarigirl, Sorry, I couldn't resist writing a few things down....... Hope you don't mind. #smiles

@First bolded... Hmm.... You've mentioned this before. Can't say if this means you're darn serious.... Hmm.... So lemme ask.... U serious about this? Safarigirl?

@Second bolded... Well, honestly I understand that not all folks will get married. Sometimes I tell my mom to prepare for that eventuality with me JUST IN CASE #smiles

Even Apostle Paul didn't get married. But hey! Don't see the need for one? Safari, what exactly pisses you off in marriage relationships? #Mehn!! We gotta talk.... Remind me again how you got here? #smiles... Anyway, bottolmline is not every one will get married eventually.

@Third bolded... Well, You got a point there. BUT even Intellectuals, narcissists, workaholics, Highly ambitious individuals, and the likes get married. Enter Albert Einstein (yeah, his first marriage went awry), The Bernoulli family, William Gates III (Bill Gates), Larry Ellison, Andrew Wiles, John D. Rockefeller and a host of others...... But hey! It's all about finding someone (or rather being found by someone) who can be comfortable with such lifestyle and philosophy. I fall into this category, same as you interestingly...... But should being an intellectual, a workaholic, a genius or the likes be a reason to not get married? Or get into a relationship that may lead to marriage?

Hmm.... Well, on one hand, Getting married to the "Right one" can help boost your works and focus BUT on the other hand, It could be the doom of the intellectual and the likes.

@Fourth bolded... Huh?? Did you just write that? Come on Safarihoney..... Gimme a break. You don't love yourself "THAT MUCH"?? So then, how much do you love yourself? LISTEN UP, No one can love you more than you love yourself..... So if you don't love yourself that much..... How can you tell if someone loves or cares for you "that much"?? It all starts with you..... It has to start with you. Well, at least thanks goodness, you'll believe me if I say, GOD LOVES YOU SO MUCH..... RIGHT? Yep... You gotta believe it. After all, you believe in GOD..... You're not an atheist.

And guess what? God is love. So you believe in GOD means you somehow gotta believe in Love...... #smiles..... I know you don't agree with this logic.


Truth is, like you, I sometimes.... ONLY SOMETIMES feel I may not get married at all. A lot of times I've been jeered at by colleagues from my first degree studies who said stuffs like, "How will this kid live with his wife? Maybe when she says, 'Good morning Honey....' He'll responds via reflex saying, 'Yeah!!!... That's it!!! Dopamine in the substantia nigra!!!!' OR Saying, 'Yeah.... Mass and Energy are interconvertible'. As if he's just waking up......" Ahahahahahahaha.......


But then I look at some lives that reminds me of a part of myself.... People like Michael Nash, Einstein, Tim Berners Lee, Terrence Tao and even Benjamin Carson and Keith L. Black. Somehow, these guys got married. Not really because they needed to...... But at the time, they found someone who could love (and cope with) them for what they were and who they are.

Another Truth is this: Marriage shouldn't be entered into simply because we have to or because people are getting married. Marriage should come up when two people (a man and a woman) wanna come together and make an Empire... It's not about sex... It's not about the romance alone OR JUST ABOUT LOVE.... BUT IT'S MORE ABOUT FULFILLING A PURPOSE THAT IS CONNECTED TO THE UNION OF TWO LIVES THAT WILL FORM A SUPER COUPLE WITH ONE HEART, ONE SPIRIT AND SIMILAR MINDSETS.


Funny thing is Even Our Lord Jesus never got married while on Earth..... Wanna know why?? Not necessarily because HE'S GOD.... OR The Son of GOD... But because of one word alone, "PURPOSE" ...... HE KNEW MARRIAGE WASN'T PART OF HIS PURPOSE ON EARTH...... So if Marriage isn't part of one's purpose, then why should one marry??!!! If it is.... Great!!! You get to DO what you see other couples do (AS MOST GUYS THINK IS THE PURPOSE OF MARRIAGE...... Sex and more sex... Kids and romance and someone to keep you warm at night.... HOW WRONG THEY ARE!!!).... DON'T GET CARRIED AWAY FOLKS..... IT'S MORE ABOUT PURPOSE THAN ABOUT LOVE. But yeah, Love is involved.

Safarigirl, I know you think Love sucks right? Or no, you feel Love don't exist apart from the love that exist between mother and child right? Okay, but know this...... Love as I know it isn't just a thing or a force.... It's the most powerful force in the world. BUT IT'S NOT JUST A FORCE. Love is a person. Love is GOD.

I don't know what made you write all these.... Especially dropping that statement, "I don't love myself that much", BUT I know how bright, smart, intelligent, brilliant, creative, gifted and sapiosexually-oriented you are.

Girl, you got potentials. And there are some of those potentials which ONLY LOVE can activate. See why you need to recognise and feel more love in your life? Anyway, that's all from me....... For now


safarigirl:
I was sitting next to this family in church some weeks ago and I watched how the husband and wife interacted with each other and their child, while I did this, one thought occurred to me; I don't particularly care for that sort of interaction.


Gamophobia simply implies a fear of marriage/commitment, now while I may not specifically say I'm gamophobic, I do acknowledge that I'm apathetic towards such things. I speak enough about it and make jokes on relationships, but I don't feel this need to be in one.

I don't feel like I'm missing out on anything, I find some relationships ridiculous and laughable and I have a life plan of adopting a kid at thirty in the event that I haven't trapped some pour soul by then (which I don't plan to).

Many people probably feel like I do about relationships; can't stay in one, don't see the need for one, won't engage in one if given the chance. This is particularly rampant amongst intellectuals, narcissists, workaholics and the likes.


I don't love myself that much (couldn't give a rat's behind honestly), I may not be the easiest person to deal with, so I would rather keep my drama to myself, I would rather not meet other people, but when I do, I get lively and animated. I'm shy and would say that I suffer some form of low self esteem issues (even my late mother couldn't talk me out of it).....generally, I haven't felt the need to be in a relationship or seen myself in one.


Does anyone else feel same? Or has anyone felt same and gotten over it? I don't think I ever will

4 Likes

Re: Are You Gamophobic? by Nobody: 6:02pm On Jan 29, 2016
safarigirl:
intellectuals, narcissists, workaholics and the likes.
You just described me.
Re: Are You Gamophobic? by cruzita(f): 6:03pm On Jan 29, 2016
I feel same too but with time I will overcome it
Re: Are You Gamophobic? by AfroKnight: 9:45pm On Jan 29, 2016
safarigirl:
I don't believe in love....at least not in an African setting, I do not think the black race capable of expression of love, maybe they do love, but they certainly suck at expression.

This is bullshit. It is pathetic that an african would write this.

So which race is capable of expressing love? The caucasians and Asians whose movies and soaps you watch? Get real.

3 Likes

Re: Are You Gamophobic? by Gerrard59(m): 10:10pm On Jan 29, 2016
I have always found relationships as time tasking and energy sapping. I have been accused of being selfish, narcissistic and self centered; but then who can love myself more than me? I find it very difficult to show affection for anyone other than myself.

With the way marriages are going and people cheating on their partners(you wonder why they dated) one just has to be Home Alone. Although there's a girl I admired and still admire during my secondary school days, I ONE day hope to marry her(all things being equal); if not her, I will find it extremely difficult to marry anyone.
I shudder at the fact that you don't love yourself, who will love you then? Love yourself oh...

Besides most relationships I see today are just flings and an exhibition of "holding body and soul together".

3 Likes

Re: Are You Gamophobic? by safarigirl(f): 8:15am On Jan 30, 2016
AfroKnight:


This is bullshit. It is pathetic that an african would write this.

So which race is capable of expressing love? The caucasians and Asians whose movies and soaps you watch? Get real.
bros, stop hyperventilating. You are not more racist than I am....I stopped watching white people movies almost ten years ago so I wouldn't know what they she these days.


What I meant by incapable is that the black man is not fashioned to do things like write poetry, buy flowers/chocolate and all that crappy stuff whites do. They show love, but their expression is poor, probably because the black race is more masculine in nature; not given to emotional outbursts, not necessarily weak-minded and the likes. I see the black man in an alpha male status, hence, the inability to express things like love the way the more feminine whites would.

I like them like that, I don't take any black man trying to practice soap opera love seriously

2 Likes

Re: Are You Gamophobic? by Ishilove: 12:10pm On Jan 30, 2016
Dudeweedlmao:
Just stop overthinking everything.

Thats one problem with people like you, you're not really gamophobic or anything, it's just in your mind
The mind is a powerful tool, you keep telling yourself you wont fit right in a relationship and your body will follow, you sub conciousness will project that thought and it becomes a reality, change your perception, change how you view reality. You probably have a powerful mind thats why you don't see the relevance of normie (normal) activities like relationships etc. cause your mind is too busy with esoteric stuff.

You think you're not easy to deal with? Lmao
I used to think relationships where boring and pointless until i let myself loose and experienced the other side of life
Lo and behold it was beautiful as i had fallen for an angel in humanoid form. She made all my dramma look like nothing, Even though we broke up, i still don't regret anything.

Tl:DR: my point is don't just assume you're gamophobic until you've actually found that one person that can awaken your inner beast, There is soo much to life and so little time, so make the best of it, alright?

Re: Are You Gamophobic? by Ishilove: 12:18pm On Jan 30, 2016
safarigirl:
bros, stop hyperventilating. You are not more racist than I am....I stopped watching white people movies almost ten years ago so I wouldn't know what they she these days.


What I meant by incapable is that the black man is not fashioned to do things like write poetry, buy flowers/chocolate and all that crappy stuff whites do. They show love, but their expression is poor, probably because the black race is more masculine in nature; not given to emotional outbursts, not necessarily weak-minded and the likes. I see the black man in an alpha male status, hence, the inability to express things like love the way the more feminine whites would.

I like them like that, I don't take any black man trying to practice soap opera love seriously
Buying flowers and all that stuff is a culture thing. I have always said it on this forum that if a man buys me flowers, I will use it to cook efo riro for him.

Us Africans have our own peculiar ways of expressing affection so using the whiteman's standard to judge our black brothers is very wrong.

Back to the the topic, I will have to agree with Duduweedlmao. You haven't yet met that one who will set your soul on fire, but there is still time. I too used to be like you, but the difference is I have so much passion burning in me, but no worthy recipient because I lose interest quickly. As one gets older, priorities change.

You're still in full bloom so don't label yourself gamophobic just yet wink

1 Like

Re: Are You Gamophobic? by An0nimus: 2:14pm On Jan 30, 2016
TheSuperNerd which kine thesis you dey write sef? angry
Re: Are You Gamophobic? by An0nimus: 2:36pm On Jan 30, 2016
safarigirl:
I was sitting next to this family in church some weeks ago and I watched how the husband and wife interacted with each other and their child, while I did this, one thought occurred to me; I don't particularly care for that sort of interaction.


Gamophobia simply implies a fear of marriage/commitment, now while I may not specifically say I'm gamophobic, I do acknowledge that I'm apathetic towards such things. I speak enough about it and make jokes on relationships, but I don't feel this need to be in one.

I don't feel like I'm missing out on anything, I find some relationships ridiculous and laughable and I have a life plan of adopting a kid at thirty in the event that I haven't trapped some pour soul by then (which I don't plan to).

Many people probably feel like I do about relationships; can't stay in one, don't see the need for one, won't engage in one if given the chance. This is particularly rampant amongst intellectuals, narcissists, workaholics and the likes.


I don't love myself that much (couldn't give a rat's behind honestly), I may not be the easiest person to deal with, so I would rather keep my drama to myself, I would rather not meet other people, but when I do, I get lively and animated. I'm shy and would say that I suffer some form of low self esteem issues (even my late mother couldn't talk me out of it).....generally, I haven't felt the need to be in a relationship or seen myself in one.


Does anyone else feel same? Or has anyone felt same and gotten over it? I don't think I ever will

A good part of your post is a vivid description of me. I see most of these relationships today as overly routine, strength-sapping, time-wasting and boring. This, as someone here's said, has affected my outlook on the subject and how I relate with female interests.

I can see a girl today, get her contact, chat her up, like her personality then next week I'll just become uninterested. Someone even said I should seek spiritual help lol. Away from that, I do believe there's that person you'll meet that'll scatter your dada. I guess that's why I find it hard to say I'm gamophobic.

1 Like

Re: Are You Gamophobic? by TheSuperNerd(m): 3:16pm On Jan 30, 2016
Ahahaha.... I know... It's long. But it's no thesis.... *smiles*

An0nimus:
TheSuperNerd which kine thesis you dey write sef? angry

Re: Are You Gamophobic? by Nobody: 4:25pm On Jan 30, 2016
safarigirl:
bros, stop hyperventilating. You are not more racist than I am....I stopped watching white people movies almost ten years ago so I wouldn't know what they she these days.


What I meant by incapable is that the black man is not fashioned to do things like write poetry, buy flowers/chocolate and all that crappy stuff whites do. They show love, but their expression is poor, probably because the black race is more masculine in nature; not given to emotional outbursts, not necessarily weak-minded and the likes. I see the black man in an alpha male status, hence, the inability to express things like love the way the more feminine whites would.

I like them like that, I don't take any black man trying to practice soap opera love seriously

So then, a white feminine beta male would be your ideal match? I don't think so
Also why do you think alpha male can't express love? Thats not true dear
In our hands you would experience love at its purest form

Ps: i think you're absolutely gorgeous, you should let me love you
With all your intellectual prowess and my alpha status we could birth the next Albert Einstein.

1 Like

Re: Are You Gamophobic? by TruthHurts1(m): 1:49pm On Feb 02, 2016
safarigirl:
I was sitting next to this family in church some weeks ago and I watched how the husband and wife interacted with each other and their child, while I did this, one thought occurred to me; I don't particularly care for that sort of interaction.


Gamophobia simply implies a fear of marriage/commitment, now while I may not specifically say I'm gamophobic, I do acknowledge that I'm apathetic towards such things. I speak enough about it and make jokes on relationships, but I don't feel this need to be in one.

I don't feel like I'm missing out on anything, I find some relationships ridiculous and laughable and I have a life plan of adopting a kid at thirty in the event that I haven't trapped some pour soul by then (which I don't plan to).

Many people probably feel like I do about relationships; can't stay in one, don't see the need for one, won't engage in one if given the chance. This is particularly rampant amongst intellectuals, narcissists, workaholics and the likes.


I don't love myself that much (couldn't give a rat's behind honestly), I may not be the easiest person to deal with, so I would rather keep my drama to myself, I would rather not meet other people, but when I do, I get lively and animated. I'm shy and would say that I suffer some form of low self esteem issues (even my late mother couldn't talk me out of it).....generally, I haven't felt the need to be in a relationship or seen myself in one.


Does anyone else feel same? Or has anyone felt same and gotten over it? I don't think I ever will

Are you a law student?
Re: Are You Gamophobic? by ourchoice(m): 2:11pm On Feb 02, 2016
safarigirl:
bros, stop hyperventilating. You are not more racist than I am....I stopped watching white people movies almost ten years ago so I wouldn't know what they she these days.


What I meant by incapable is that the black man is not fashioned to do things like write poetry, buy flowers/chocolate and all that crappy stuff whites do. They show love, but their expression is poor, probably because the black race is more masculine in nature; not given to emotional outbursts, not necessarily weak-minded and the likes. I see the black man in an alpha male status, hence, the inability to express things like love the way the more feminine whites would.

I like them like that, I don't take any black man trying to practice soap opera love seriously
I am very sure that many lovely white guys would love to have u as their lover and wife....why not give them a chance since u are more inclined to their kind of love than that of the blacks maybe u have discovered the reason y u should consider interracial marriage.

....generally speaking, with the way things are presently and with the way women have defined love and who to love, if not for having children in wedlock, many guys wouldn't marry either undecided
Re: Are You Gamophobic? by ourchoice(m): 2:16pm On Feb 02, 2016
Penisinpenisout:


So then, a white feminine beta male would be your ideal match? I don't think so
Also why do you think alpha male can't express love? Thats not true dear
In our hands you would experience love at its purest form

Ps: i think you're absolutely gorgeous, you should let me love you
With all your intellectual prowess and my alpha status we could birth the next Albert Einstein.
Mistake number 1: don't persuade any woman to love u...and don't feel u are in love with her already just because u saw her picture and write-up, u may fall out of love with her when u see her in real life. if u truly want to know her more and see if u guys can try each other, politely send her a message and don't profess love so fast based on her profile picture to avoid first disappointment.

My little opinionsmiley

2 Likes

Re: Are You Gamophobic? by safarigirl(f): 2:25pm On Feb 02, 2016
ourchoice:
I am very sure that many lovely white guys would love to have u as their lover and wife....why not give them a chance since u are more inclined to their kind of love than that of the blacks maybe u have discovered the reason y u should consider interracial marriage.

....generally speaking, with the way things are presently and with the way women have defined love and who to love, if not for having children in wedlock, many guys wouldn't marry either undecided
I don't know where you got your own idea that I prefer the way white people 'love'....you must have a thing for putting words in people's mouth.


Don't assume men are high commodity either, if not for society, women would rather stay single. Men are more needy than women, ever wondered why widowers are more open to remarrying than widows?


They simply can't handle pressure like women.

2 Likes

Re: Are You Gamophobic? by safarigirl(f): 2:28pm On Feb 02, 2016
TruthHurts1:

Are you a law student?
yes, why do you ask?
Re: Are You Gamophobic? by ourchoice(m): 2:42pm On Feb 02, 2016
safarigirl:
I don't know where you got your own idea that I prefer the way white people 'love'....you must have a thing for putting words in people's mouth.


Don't assume men are high commodity either, if not for society, women would rather stay single. Men are more needy than women, ever wondered why widowers are more open to remarrying than widows?


They simply can't handle pressure like women.
I got clue from your comment which I quoted. Read it again. U talked about loving the way whitemen show women love like giving flowers, writing poems, etc...and criticized the way black men love by being alpha male, masculine or what. U can correct me. I got all that from your comment, which indirectly means that u prefer whitemen's love to black men's love. So I suggested u go for interracial, which isn't bad.

As for my last statement....and your last paragraph, u maybe right...men prefer girlfriends to wife if not for legal child bearing.

It's all good, it's not bad for u to prefer whitemen to black men...there are also black men who prefer white ladies to black ladies...its all about preference
Re: Are You Gamophobic? by Nobody: 3:14pm On Feb 02, 2016
Like wee care ?

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