It is a very difficult question you've asked there, my sister.

The answer, though, will not be too far from the fact that these Nigerian children are growing up in societies where it's not too 'cool' to be African. It's not cool for them to have to identify with the images that are flashed across the TV about Africa in the news or movies. It's not cool for them to start spending time, trying to spell out their names to other kids who will only too easily inform them that the name is 'funny' or even bully them both physically or psychologically because of it.  

The reality is that these children, like all of us living in the diaspora, have their own burdens to bear from the shame that modern Africa has become. In their defence it's not only Nigerian children who shy away from those 'unusual' and sometimes long names. It's seen in all kids even among Asians and Latino's and even among the Caucasians. So let's not be too harsh on them. For a lot of them it's part of the rites of passage of being bicultural children.

Whether we like it or not, these children are growing up as bicultural individuals, but our responsibility to them would be to first empathise with their insecurities. And then to guide them into learning to be proud of themselves and about their African heritage, which does not start with slavery and end with colonialism and the poverty and famines and wars that Africa is associated with. Hopefully as they learn to accept who they are and learn of things to be proud of about their heritage, some will come round to carrying their African names, like badges of honour. 

The key word here is to show them why they should be proud of their heritage.

The guy on American Idol is called Chikezie and I didnt see him shortening his name.


I dont see why its a big deal if someone shortens their name anyway. Do people not shorten names in Nigeria?

ada_beke:

becko! can somebody please tell me why our nigerian children are ashamed of their names ?
what is wrong with it ? is it because we are a little diffrent when it comes to pronouncation and spelling ., but what about the asians, the indians, the spanish and the french ,  most of the naija kids when asked " what is your name?" instead of saying Ugochukwu or Chimezie or Ijeoma they say bobby , chi-chi, or omy ,  WHAT IN THE WORLD ! Nwatakiri kedu ihe bu ahagi ! Gini bu aha nna gi ! Geesz ,  What is bobby ?! Mechae onu gi ! Going back to the main topic , , why do you think our nigerian kids are ashamed of their names? where do they get it from ?! is it their[parents' fault ? where is naija heading from this ? Im all about culture and tradition ,so when i hear this it really shames me ., what can be done about this though? what is it about our name that we can't stand up tall and say it with[i] PRIDE [/i] !

I can't speak for other people but for me and only me. I shorten my name because it is very long and when translated in Igbo is actually a sentence. When I introduce myself I say my full name what is means (which people always say is a beautiful name) and then give the shrotened version. Since I love the meaning of my name I get easily frustrated when people pronounce it wrong so as not to embarrass the person I shorten it. I don't tell Nigerians the shortened version of my name.

I have met Nigerians that completely change their name (eg. from Tamie to Jamie) or Chinasa to Diana. Maybe there are ashamed I don't know but am not.

tpiah:

The guy on American Idol is called Chikezie and I didnt see him shortening his name.


I dont see why its a big deal if someone shortens their name anyway. Do people not shorten names in Nigeria?

im talkinq mainly about children & teenagers ,  he is an adult . he knows his culture and appreciates it.
children now really have no clue . they lack pride
& besides ., theres nothing wrong with shortening your name ,
its just the motive behind it , why they shortened their name ,
is it embarssment to them ?

savanaha:

I can't speak for other people but for me and only me. I shorten my name because it is very long and when translated in Igbo is actually a sentence. When I introduce myself I say my full name what is means (which people always say is a beautiful name) and then give the shrotened version. Since I love the meaning of my name I get easily frustrated when people pronounce it wrong so as not to embarrass the person I shorten it. I don't tell Nigerians the shortened version of my name.

I have met Nigerians that completely change their name (eg. from Tamie to Jamie) or Chinasa to Diana. Maybe there are ashamed I don't know but am not.

i understand and like what your saying ., , but for me when someone asks me for my name is give them the full name , no nickname or anything.because i dont like nicknames , but that is a personal prefrence

ada_beke:

i understand and like what your saying ., , but for me when someone asks me for my name is give them the full name , no nickname or anything.because i dont like nicknames , but that is a personal prefrence

If they wouldn't butcher my name and twist the meaning I would only give them my full name. Seeing as I hold the meaning of a name strongly and translate things word for word. I don't want someone messing up my name which has GOD in it and twisting it into something else. I get easily annoyed when people mess up my name and sometimes I have embarrassed people that might have been trying.

Some of the people I agree are funny e.g. Nkechi/Nkem/Morenike suddenly becoming Nicky or Kiki or Nnenna becoming Nina or my "personal favourite" Mobolaji becoming La-la.

Most of it I think is mostly people trying to fit in.

However I think a lot of it is to make it easy for the general public. When my brother moved to secondary school he started answering his English name because he was tired of people murdering the pronounciation. And this was in Nigeria. But we're not Yoruba/Igbo/Hausa so we don't have names that most Nigerians are accustomed to. I've had the same problem both in Naij but using my English name didn't work for me because I kept forgetting to respond to it when called so I reverted back to my traditional name and just manage it like that with people.

Nigerian children are ashamed of their names because they get that idea from Nigerian society and their parents' generation. Growing up in Nigeria there are parents that give their children ONLY English names (I don't even support giving children English names. Have you ever seen an English person running around with an Igbo name? Yet Nigerians - especially IGBOS love to give their children stupid English names because they think those names are better) and they see people value English and other foreign names over Nigerian names. They see people with only Nigerian names called bush or razz or backward, so they internalize these ideologies and either change their names, start to answer only their English name, or they abbreviate their Nigerian name to a more English sounding nickname.

Look at what is going on in Nigeria. There are thousands of Nigerians with very stupid English names such as Bright, Million, Brilliant, Happiness, Blessing, etc.

Isn't a name in your language ten times better than a nonsense name in English? Yet people (and even educated people) continue to give their children such incredibly stupid names in English just so they can say the child has an English name.

I once met a couple that actually named their unfortunate daughter Queen Elizabeth. I couldn't stop laughing. It's too sad.

Nigerians need to wake up. Stop worshiping White people. Yes, someone is going to deny it but we do. To some relevant extent, Nigerians overglorify White people and everything about them and that is why we continue to punish our children with bullshit names like MoneyHard, Pleasure, President, and goodness knows what else.

All my children will have Igbo names ONLY (unless of course their father is from a different tribe or country - then they will also have names from his tribe or country) That is the only way I will tolerate a foreign name for my children.

When you find a White Ngozi you let me know.

becko! can somebody please tell me why our nigerian children are ashamed of their names ?
what is wrong with it ? is it because we are a little diffrent when it comes to pronouncation and spelling ., but what about the asians, the indians, the spanish and the french , most of the naija kids when asked " what is your name?" instead of saying Ugochukwu or Chimezie or Ijeoma they say bobby , chi-chi, or omy , WHAT IN THE WORLD ! Nwatakiri kedu ihe bu ahagi ! Gini bu aha nna gi ! Geesz , What is bobby ?! Mechae onu gi ! Going back to the main topic , , why do you think our nigerian kids are ashamed of their names? where do they get it from ?! is it their[parents' fault ? where is naija heading from this ? Im all about culture and tradition ,so when i hear this it really shames me ., what can be done about this though? what is it about our name that we can't stand up tall and say it with PRIDE !


I wonder this kind thing don tire me

LOL @Ada beke, I just love your topics. 

Well, it could be that they think their names are too 'local'. I personally don't have any english name whatsoever (middle or first) so I've made people understand that they're gonna get used to my igbo name. It's harder when you're not in naija, these Americans can butcher people's names sha but I'm already used to it. my friends mostly call me by my nickname though but I always introduce myself to people using my full name and when it's too difficult, they resolve to the shortened form.

Tatase:


I've had the same problem both in Naij but using my English name didn't work for me because I kept forgetting to respond to it when called so I reverted back to my traditional name and just manage it like that with people.

LOL, that's funny and true. That's why I can't even think of changing my name, I've become used to my name no matter how difficult it is for people to pronounce.


@Savanaha, I know what you mean. my name is probably similar to yours, it has 'God' in it and yes, it's frustrating when it's pronounced wrongly 'cause it changes the entire meaning of the name.

The parents are to blame.
A persons name is the first line of their identity. If a child reacts negatively to their name, it's just a projection of how they've been made to feel inside; more than anything, it is a reflection of their parents insecurities.

You would generally find that kids who do this come from a background were they constantly hear things like "the shame that Africa has become". If we can be positive, our kids will have the inner strength to stand up for their identities. We can address our issues without condemning everything African.

becko! can somebody please tell me why our nigerian children are ashamed of their names ?
what is wrong with it ? is it because we are a little diffrent when it comes to pronouncation and spelling ., but what about the asians, the indians, the spanish and the french ,  most of the naija kids when asked " what is your name?" instead of saying Ugochukwu or Chimezie or Ijeoma they say bobby , chi-chi, or omy ,  WHAT IN THE WORLD ! Nwatakiri kedu ihe bu ahagi ! Gini bu aha nna gi ! Geesz ,  What is bobby ?! Mechae onu gi ! Going back to the main topic , , why do you think our nigerian kids are ashamed of their names? where do they get it from ?! is it their[parents' fault ? where is naija heading from this ? Im all about culture and tradition ,so when i hear this it really shames me ., what can be done about this though? what is it about our name that we can't stand up tall and say it with PRIDE !

ada beke,
May the good lord bless you in more ways than you can imagine. I have been wanting to raise this issue for a while now.

Growing up in Nigeria there are parents that give their children ONLY English names (I don't even support giving children English names. Have you ever seen an English person running around with an Igbo name? Yet Nigerians - especially IGBOS love to give their children stupid English names because they think those names are better) and they see people value English and other foreign names over Nigerian names. They see people with only Nigerian names called bush or razz or backward, so they internalize these ideologies and either change their names, start to answer only their English name, or they abbreviate their Nigerian name to a more English sounding nickname.

Look at what is going on in Nigeria. There are thousands of Nigerians with very stupid English names such as Bright, Million, Brilliant, Happiness, Blessing, etc.

Isn't a name in your language ten times better than a nonsense name in English? Yet people (and even educated people) continue to give their children such incredibly stupid names in English just so they can say the child has an English name

I once met a couple that actually named their unfortunate daughter Queen Elizabeth. I couldn't stop laughing. It's too sad.

Nigerians need to wake up. Stop worshiping White people. Yes, someone is going to deny it but we do. To some relevant extent, Nigerians overglorify White people and everything about them and that is why we continue to punish our children with bullshit names like MoneyHard, Pleasure, President, and goodness knows what else.

All my children will have Igbo names ONLY (unless of course their father is from a different tribe or country - then they will also have names from his tribe or country) That is the only way I will tolerate a foreign name for my children.

When you find a White Ngozi you let me know.

Sugabelly,
Thank the almighty God too for your wisdom jare, the thing is sooooooooo annoying.

who said so

mama-gee:

who said so

i did, aint u ashamed of your name,ehn?nkemdilichukwu okorogbegamuna

,amebo no1:

i did, aint u ashamed of your name,ehn?nkemdilichukwu okorogbegamuna

And what is there to be ashamed off?
I really can't understand your post. Can you explain?

Beaf:

And what is there to be ashamed off?
I really can't understand your post. Can you explain?

The idiot won't get over the fact I gave her mother the insults of her miserable life, she's here all over me licking my black ass.

,amebo no1:

i did, aint u ashamed of your name,ehn?nkemdilichukwu okorogbegamuna

haha, you're anger has made me satisfied that I really did a good job.

@ Beaf, i choose to respond to you, personally because of the fact that you used a phrase of mine ('the shame that Africa has become') in a context which doesn't do me a lot of justice. Much as i am not obligated to defend myself, i will do so anyway, because i have the time on my hands!

Having said that, i appreciate your contributions and have much respect for your thoughts here and in other posts.

Beaf:

The parents are to blame.
A persons name is the first line of their identity. If a child reacts negatively to their name, it's just a projection of how they've been made to feel inside; more than anything, it is a reflection of their parents insecurities.

You would generally find that kids who do this come from a background were they constantly hear things like "the shame that Africa has become". If we can be positive, our kids will have the inner strength to stand up for their identities. We can address our issues without condemning everything African.

I don't completely agree with u there, my friend. To blame is not the 'parents', but the much wider context within which the shame that we are referring to evolved, and also to blame is the ignorance and lack of support from individuals (perhaps the parents) and the communities that are meant to protect their self-esteems. It is not as simple as asking the parents, as you advised to 'be positive etc' The context is a lot more complex and varies with each individual.

I'll give a personal example. The reason i do so, is that you used my phrase in the same sentence where you talked about 'parents' insecurities', thereby suggesting your assumptions about me. It may not have been conscious, perhaps a 'freudian slip' as we say in psycho-babble, but you do have assumptions about me, from my post which may not be entirely true. So here goes.

My 5 year old kid is one of 2 of African heriage in his class. The others are some 8 Caucasians, a mixed race kid and an Asian. You might say that his is a decent middle class prep school. I don't mind the investment because i understand the value of a proper education. At the moment he is going through the phase in his life where he is not too proud of his long African surname. Not too long ago we (my wife and i) were called to his school because he had gotten into a slight altercation with a group of other boys who had been making fun of his name. After that incident i noticed that he started to become irritated with the way people struggle to pronounce his surname to the point where he now just gives his middle name (which is Hebrew by the way) when anybody asks him his name. He mutters, if asked about his surname that 'you won't be able to pronounce it anyway'.

My choice of Hebrew in his name is personal and has nothing to do with issues of 'insecurity'. I have done that 'insecurity' journey a long time ago and have prevailed.

It would be patronising for me, even as a parent, to assume that my son is not an individual who has already started on his own life journey. I won't patronise him because i understand his burden, having spent most of my growing up years in different countries, experiencing racism to the point of having my head broken in and spat at by others because of the colour of my skin before i even turned 10! I too have gone through the phase of being ashamed of my name and of being African, so I understand his burden and will guide him in his journey of self-discovery in a way that is both sensitive and informed.

Most of our children who struggle under the burden of the 'shame that Africa has become' do not have sensitive and informed parents. They have instead people (uncles, older brothers, 'patriotic' individuals etc) who are in denial and who do not understand the problems of navigating the tumultous paths of growing up and becoming socialised in societies that are very hostile to them; uncles and brothers who are so detached that they blame it on their parents 'insecurities'.

These children are engaged in psychological battles, which they are not fully equipped to win without support and so to survive they are having to adopt all sorts of strategies just to fit in, irrespective of how 'patriotic' their parents are or how loud the parents and uncles shout at them. They are having to be in places where these older more secure people cannot be to protect them. What the children need is for those that would scold them to first attempt to understand where they are coming from and then to try to help them into a more healthy frame of mind.

My friend Beaf, I will not apologise to you for the embarrasment i feel at the 'shame Africa has become'. If you are not ashamed of what is going on in Africa, it's your choice really not mine.

@ Beneli, you are very correct.

i'veseen so many igbo's with name martins kate victorious george, very annoying das why i like people with their traditional names or atleast christian or muslim names

beneli:

@ Beaf, i choose to respond to you, personally because of the fact that you used a phrase of mine ('the shame that Africa has become') in a context which doesn't do me a lot of justice. Much as i am not obligated to defend myself, i will do so anyway, because i have the time on my hands!

Oh no! I just made up that phrase; if I was quoting you, I'd have put it the green quotation box and made clear who I was quoting. I think you've made a mistake. That was 100% coincidence.

On the issue of growing up with people making fun of your surname; I have one of those funny ones, believe me! I went through school primary, secondary and university with it; just like my siblings, just like my dad before me. I coped with it by turning it right back, not fighting; but finding something funny about those poking fun, that I could insist on and really laugh about. Being made fun off is part of growing up.

Again; I really wasn't quoting you, but thanks for sharing.

So I don't believe you should have given your son a Hebrew name. There are no Hebrews, and I repeat there are NO Hebrews that would even dream of giving their children an Igbo name.

Sure, you might say insecurity is not the reason you gave your son that name, but it all boils down to the same thing: Why are Africans so ever-willing to give their children foreign names when foreigners would laugh at you in disgust if you even suggested an African name for their child?

And by the way, it is only if people insist on using their African names that foreigners will learn how to pronounce our names properly.

I dont understand why My best friend shorten her first and last name because she didnt like it. I think her name is beautiful and it has a meaning unlike standard English name,

I dont understand why   My best friend shorten her first and last name because she didnt like it. I think her name is beautiful and it has a meaning unlike standard English name,   

sugabelly:

So I don't believe you should have given your son a Hebrew name. There are no Hebrews, and I repeat there are NO Hebrews that would even dream of giving their children an Igbo name.

Sure, you might say insecurity is not the reason you gave your son that name, but it all boils down to the same thing: Why are Africans so ever-willing to give their children foreign names when foreigners would laugh at you in disgust if you even suggested an African name for their child?

And by the way, it is only if people insist on using their African names that foreigners will learn how to pronounce our names properly.

Actually, some foreigners give their kids African names especially those seeking to find their African roots. Even some whites do it these days when they think an African name is 'cute' without even knowing the meaning. I have a friend from Barbados: her name is Jamila, middle name Ayo. According to her, her mother got them from an African book.


Let's just agree that foreigners wouldn't dream of giving their kids an African name. That's also because they're not the ones trying to make a living in Africa, you're the one trying to do so in their country. Some people will claim inferiority complex bla bla bla but believe me, I'm all for the 'identity' thing and giving kids names from their culture.

You'll agree with me that some Nigerian names can be really tongue-twisting especially for foreigners and yes, you're not supposed to care, they can go kick rocks!! so long as your name has a nice meaning behind it. Wrong!! OK, you can be adamant all you want and insist on bearing your native name, foreigners are going to butcher it badly and at the end of the day when it's being called, it doesn't have the intended meaning. So, why not make it easy on yourself? At least keep the native names nice and simple - some people go on a long thing when it comes to Nigerian names. Giving your child a biblical name is not exactly the same as going 'western' since there are many Nigerians who are Christians. Even Nigerians living in Nigeria bear English names without a problem, all of a sudden it's inferiority complex when someone living abroad does it.

PS: you can't force anyone to pronounce a name right if they find it completely difficult to do so. I can say that since I've been living here, not one person has been successful enough to say my name right. Only the few Igbos, not even all Nigerians much more all Africans. I'm just saying.

sugabelly:

Nigerian children are ashamed of their names because they get that idea from Nigerian society and their parents' generation. Growing up in Nigeria there are parents that give their children ONLY English names (I don't even support giving children English names. Have you ever seen an English person running around with an Igbo name? Yet Nigerians - especially IGBOS love to give their children stupid English names because they think those names are better) and they see people value English and other foreign names over Nigerian names. They see people with only Nigerian names called bush or razz or backward, so they internalize these ideologies and either change their names, start to answer only their English name, or they abbreviate their Nigerian name to a more English sounding nickname.

Look at what is going on in Nigeria. There are thousands of Nigerians with very stupid English names such as Bright, Million, Brilliant, Happiness, Blessing, etc.

Isn't a name in your language ten times better than a nonsense name in English? Yet people (and even educated people) continue to give their children such incredibly stupid names in English just so they can say the child has an English name.



All my children will have Igbo names ONLY (unless of course their father is from a different tribe or country - then they will also have names from his tribe or country) That is the only way I will tolerate a foreign name for my children.

When you find a White Ngozi you let me know.

Their catholic background should be blamed and not them. You forgot the parents give a child one name while the church decides the second name for the child. So, it's religious and not westernization. Many catholics in other parts of the world have names like that too and not just Africans.

Actually giving your children Biblical names is still mindlessly copying another culture. If you want to give your child a Christian name, name them Jesus, Mary or Joseph, nothing else.

You forget that the Bible is basically a history book of HEBREW culture. Last time I checked we were not Hebrew. The Israelis are NOT better than us, and their names are definitely NOT better than ours. As far as I am concerned a Nigerian name sounds ten times better than anything else out there.

It's the same reason the Arabs insist that the Quran must always be written in Arabic (so that they can claim that since Arabic is the language of the Quran then Arabic culture must be superior to all other cultures - which is what they do. And that is why North Africa has turned into Saudi Arabia Part Two, with mindless Africans claiming that they are Arab.)

Go to Mauritania or Morocco or Egypt and watch in amazement as people blacker than coal tar are busy claiming that they are Arab and they are not bush Africans. Meanwhile the actual Arabs are still even more racist towards them but they still claim Arabness like nobody's business.

Abeg, we are who we are. I will never name any of my children anything other than a Nigerian name. And even within Nigerian names there are Nigerian short forms of those names. Who doesn't know that Ayofemi can be shortened to Ayo, or Femi? But no, idiotic Nigerians will go to America and claim their name is Fee.

We have inferiority issues. People from other countries always think that their own country is the best pata-pata. Only Nigerians will sell themselves out for others to laugh at us.

All these Angelas, Dorcases, Happinesses, Polycarps, Godswills, Moneyhards, Brights,

Also, the missionaries forced our people to take on English and Hebrew names after Baptism just to make it convenient for themselves. They told us that everything about us (our culture, our language, our names, etc) was devilish, and a lot of stupid Africans still believe that to this day.

Are we not the same stupid Africans that throw away our masks, our Ikengas, etc because we believe they are fetish or devilish? Then a random oyinbo will pick these same things up, take them to France and sell them for billions of dollars.

Are not the very same traditional objects that we the Nigerians are afraid of being sold abroad for millions? We reject our culture so easily like mumus. Meanwhile the SAME white people that told you your culture was bad will now take your cultural objects and go and sell to those who value it and become rich.

We're just a bunch of historical olodos.

sugabelly:

Actually giving your children Biblical names is still mindlessly copying another culture. If you want to give your child a Christian name, name them Jesus, Mary or Joseph, nothing else.

What do you mean by nothing else? David, Isaiah, Esther, Jacob, Magdalene, etc are not biblical names?

Anyway, I get the other points you're making.