I am gonna go straight to the point. As an individual, I hate riding alone so I often pick people (anyone my spirit accepts) at least for gist's sake and to "make life easier" for somebody. Through this little act of charity, I have experienced a lot. I have lost a lot too. The peak of it all was when I lost my Blackberry Q10 in October 2014, to a youngman. I was warned by friends and family never to pick guys on the way. Infact, my sisters took it personal asking me why I would pick a guy....that' it's safer to pick girls than guys if I must. So that day, I decided I wasn't gonna pick ANYONE again but unfortunately the next morning I saw myself reversing to "lift" a man who waved at me in appeal. With more nasty experiences from my fellow guys whom I saw it as cordial act to lift, I decided to go the ladies way since I can't endure the bore of riding alone, especially long distances. Now my problem is, each time I pick these ladies, they must make one requestrian or the other; heavy and silly ones at that. Some would ask for money, some would see one thing or the other in the car and ask if they could take it....strangers oooh This evening, I picked another one, we were riding back and as we approached one SUYA spot, she spoke up , "Dear can you do me a favor?" I said "ok?" "I feel like eating Suya, can you buy some for me?" Ofcos I declined, politely anyway. But that was so embarrassing (to me oooh). I haven't been myself since because I noticed that I often declined ,in most of these requests. AND it's beginning to make me feel so stingy eventhough I get a contrary complement as to my being stingy. I am confused. Soooo confused. What do you think guys? Help me, I want to give more this lent but my refusing some of these adhoc requests is making me feel I am sinning against charity. Am I?

As you help me with answers, feel free to share, if you have had good or nasty experiences, giving someone a lift or being lifted by someone.


Please pardon and don't border correcting the grammatical brouhahas, too disturbed to reread before posting. I would appreciate more if you attend to my worry. God bless you.


Viviangist
Prettythicksme
Abeg make una help me tell lalasticlala to help my carrier to front page

Girls sha....

I think you are bent on lifting 'sexy' ladies so they keep showing you their kind of behaviour. Charity should cut across all ages/gender, if you must be charitable. When you see an elderly woman/a mother in need of "lift", also do the needful. On disembarking they will shower you with blessings rather than requesting anything from you. FYI, the attitude you've come to see is to show you the level of decadence in the society. No need to shiver, it's well.

It should not worry you. I pick people when I feel safe. I like to do that too.

But it is stupid for a girl to ask for another after a lift. They mistake your picking them up as a sign you are interested in them and as such will start their ATM-centric behaviour. They believe you will ask for number afterwards. You have done nothing wrong...

mhiztess:
Girls sha....

Seriously! But I wont be surprised to hear same shits of guys...

Delphi:
I think you are bent on lifting 'sexy' ladies so they keep on showing you the kind of behaviour. Charity should caught across all ages/gender, if you must be charitable. When you see an elderly woman/a mother in need of "lift", also do the needful. On disembarking they will shower you with blessings rather than requesting anything from you. FYI, the attitude you've come to see is to show you the decadence in the society. No need to shiver.

Thanks bro. I do that too. I more hate to see old or pregnant women stand stranded. I hardly passby without stopping to pick. But often they scared to hop in. Besides you rarely see old women here in Abuja, especially in the evenings. AND, I have my principles! I dont care sexy or ...my interest is to make a journey easier for somebody and at the same time gaining some company.

agabaI23:
It should not worry you. I pick people when I feel safe. I like to do that too.

But it is stupid for a girl to ask for another after a lift. They mistake your picking them up as a sign you are interested in them and as such will start their ATM-centric behaviour. They believe you will ask for number afterwards. You have done nothing wrong...

Lol...."ATM-centric behaviour" indeed. Thanks bro

It's high time u listened to simple advice...if you are the type that gets bored while driving.. Hope yourself up with a very good mix and play whenvee you drive ..the world today isn't where u give random people lift,its a different case entirely if you see a woman with child but not any lady out there..

I prefer giving guys lifts too, I think girls could be well.....girls. But one's safety is paramount. You haven't done anything wrong. You don't need to feel an iota of embarrassment, I'm sure it's the girl that will feel at least a tinge of it.

I would suggest audiobooks for long distance trips.

it's good wen u try to help people bt d kinda people u pick r really funny.....it's crazy asking 4 extra favour

I only hope you won't pick one soon that will ask for the key of your car!

kunlesufyan:
It's high time u listened to simple advice...if you are the type that gets bored while driving.. Hope yourself up with a very good mix and play whenvee you drive ..the world today isn't where u give random people lift,its a different case entirely if you see a woman with child but not any lady out there..

Hmmmm, you are right bro. I'l try and watch it. Scary world indeed.

Ayt27:
I prefer giving guys lifts too, I think girls could be well.....girls. But one's safety is paramount. You haven't done anything wrong. You don't need to feel an iota of embarrassment, I'm sure it's the girl that will feel at least a tinge of it.

I would suggest audiobooks for long distance trips.

Yeah, audio books...I think I must experiment this, I just hope I won't be soo engrossed in it that I would be less conscious am driving? Do you do it? Isn't it distracting?

Tinynita:
it's good wen u try to help people bt d kinda people u pick r really funny.....it's crazy asking 4 extra favour

My dear, not just simple favors oooh, very crazy ones. Favours that would make you feel you had known such persons for generations....

modelmike7:
I only hope you won't pick one soon that will ask for the key of your car!

Lol... and that's the more reason why I became cautious of lifting guy, at least, NO WOMAN can over power me, except she's carrying AK 47 but such woman should be sure of dying with me that day if she's really gonna shoot....God forbid such situation sha

Im just wondering what you people gist about that gives them the confidence to ask for extra favours. Do you flirt with them? Oga op you haven't told us the complete story cos sometimes I give ladies free rides and they have never asked for anything except in some cases and its just my phone number

nani212:
Im just wondering what you people gist about that gives them the confidence to ask for extra favours. Do you flirt with them? Oga op you haven't told us the complete story cos sometimes I give ladies free rides and they have never asked for anything except in some cases and its just my phone number

lol... Flirt abi? I can't even imagine it. I have my principles sir. Besides, I didn't lead you into my ID because it's not necessary. To quieting your curiosity, I don't flirt, I don't even discuss personal issues or relationships with any kind of person let alone total strangers whom.....I flirt not sir and the conversations are pure. Thank you.

Is this guy drunk?

Girls can beg you for anything including your boxers..

franklingud:
Is this guy drunk?

Yes Sir, just 5 litres of water.

Nothing wrong in declining those requests. Its even awkward for a 'liftee' to request for suya just like that, unless you have really gone into yourselves via the discussions. Trust me I would have insulted her maybe.

Hian.

@OP, you're can continue giving lifts but keep declining their request during the life (You're not wrong, they are just ingrate). If at all u want to give during this lent, give to the needy (those without food not some1 who wants to eat suya)

alexohams2000:


Yeah, audio books...I think I must experiment this, I just hope I won't be soo engrossed in it that I would be less conscious am driving? Do you do it? Isn't it distracting?

No not really.....
The only thing I'd advise against is rewinding a part u didn't understand or get clearly.

Here's a site to help you out, they'v got classic books there

Thoughtaudio.com

*sigh*...giving lifts to stranger in a quest for generosity is a good way of attracting blessing and also adding credit to your good deeds. But in a case where it is abused(selfish interest) REVERSE is the case. Sir, turning down requests form liftee as a way to maintain your dignity or not going against your principles and standard is not in anyway a sinful act. You owe them nothing, and even their welfare is not your priority. If you are too sentimental to assist them Fine if not, fine. My advice for you is to be more vigilant and precautive when embarking on sensitive quest as this cos some of the country's inhabitat are not smiling at all. ShAlOm.
#caLLmeBERG

OP if you really want to help people, keep on but prepare for nasty experiences and most importantly please be safe.

Here's one nasty experience i had a few years ago in Abuja.

I was driving towards jabi and a lady waved me down. At first i thot she was a stranger in town because where she was, i know there was no way on earth she was going to get a cab. She introduced herself as Ibinabo (I will never forget). We got talking and she said she just closed from work on her way home. Approaching Jabi she told me she was in no hurry to get home and wouldnt mind accompanying me to while away time. I picked up my parcel at the bus park and took her to where she said she was living. She asked for my phone number and i declined saying i was only being the good samaritan. After much pestering and still more refusals from me, she then asked me to come and have a drink with her at home. Bro, i refused and she let me be.

A few days later, i was at church and my pastor began to narrate the experience of o colleague of his at work. Apparently, the man had picked up a lady exactly where i picked up Ibinabo. Dropped her off exactly where i dropped her off, but in his own case he decided to accept the drink from her. She took him through a bush path to a run down hut in the bush. Told him thats where she lived. No sooner had he sat down that two men came in and started the usual talk of "they have money, they need money to wash it bla bla bla". The guy then knew he was in some serious sh**. There was nobody for miles around and even if he shouted who would come to his rescue. He decided to play along and even told them he had some money in his car and needed to go and get it. The guys kept insisting that he gives Ibinabo the car keys so she would go and bring the money. He responded that where he kept the money nobody would be able to find it. They now asked the lady to accompany him to the car, and as soon as he got there, bro he took off, swearing never to help anyone again.

That would have been my lot too and maybe even worse, but because my mindset was pure God delivered me.

If you are born to give help, you may not be able to change who you are, but be careful, there are still a lot of Ibinabos out there...

eagleccentric:
OP if you really want to help people, keep on but prepare for nasty experiences and most importantly please be safe.

Here's one nasty experience i had a few years ago in Abuja.

I was driving towards jabi and a lady waved me down. At first i thot she was a stranger in town because where she was, i know there was no way on earth she was going to get a cab. She introduced herself as Ibinabo (I will never forget). We got talking and she said she just closed from work on her way home. Approaching Jabi she told me she was in no hurry to get home and wouldnt mind accompanying me to while away time. I picked up my parcel at the bus park and took her to where she said she was living. She asked for my phone number and i declined saying i was only being the good samaritan. After much pestering and still more refusals from me, she then asked me to come and have a drink with her at home. Bro, i refused and she let me be.

A few days later, i was at church and my pastor began to narrate the experience of o colleague of his at work. Apparently, the man had picked up a lady exactly where i picked up Ibinabo. Dropped her off exactly where i dropped her off, but in his own case he decided to accept the drink from her. She took him through a bush path to a run down hut in the bush. Told him thats where she lived. No sooner had he sat down that two men came in and started the usual talk of "they have money, they need money to wash it bla bla bla". The guy then knew he was in some serious sh**. There was nobody for miles around and even if he shouted who would come to his rescue. He decided to play along and even told them he had some money in his car and needed to go and get it. The guys kept insisting that he gives Ibinabo the car keys so she would go and bring the money. He responded that where he kept the money nobody would be able to find it. They now asked the lady to accompany him to the car, and as soon as he got there, bro he took off, swearing never to help anyone again.

That would have been my lot too and maybe even worse, but because my mindset was pure God delivered me.

If you are born to give help, you may not be able to change who you are, but be careful, there are still a lot of Ibinabos out there...

I just learned something from your post! Thanks sir!

eagleccentric:
OP if you really want to help people, keep on but prepare for nasty experiences and most importantly please be safe.

Here's one nasty experience i had a few years ago in Abuja.

I was driving towards jabi and a lady waved me down. At first i thot she was a stranger in town because where she was, i know there was no way on earth she was going to get a cab. She introduced herself as Ibinabo (I will never forget). We got talking and she said she just closed from work on her way home. Approaching Jabi she told me she was in no hurry to get home and wouldnt mind accompanying me to while away time. I picked up my parcel at the bus park and took her to where she said she was living. She asked for my phone number and i declined saying i was only being the good samaritan. After much pestering and still more refusals from me, she then asked me to come and have a drink with her at home. Bro, i refused and she let me be.

A few days later, i was at church and my pastor began to narrate the experience of o colleague of his at work. Apparently, the man had picked up a lady exactly where i picked up Ibinabo. Dropped her off exactly where i dropped her off, but in his own case he decided to accept the drink from her. She took him through a bush path to a run down hut in the bush. Told him thats where she lived. No sooner had he sat down that two men came in and started the usual talk of "they have money, they need money to wash it bla bla bla". The guy then knew he was in some serious sh**. There was nobody for miles around and even if he shouted who would come to his rescue. He decided to play along and even told them he had some money in his car and needed to go and get it. The guys kept insisting that he gives Ibinabo the car keys so she would go and bring the money. He responded that where he kept the money nobody would be able to find it. They now asked the lady to accompany him to the car, and as soon as he got there, bro he took off, swearing never to help anyone again.

That would have been my lot too and maybe even worse, but because my mindset was pure God delivered me.

If you are born to give help, you may not be able to change who you are, but be careful, there are still a lot of Ibinabos out there...

Wow!!! This is really a huge experience. Thanks for sharing Sir. I am sure it will help many. Please do share your "liftee" or "lifter" experiences here. You never can tell how many lives it will save. God bless nairaland.

agabaI23:
It should not worry you. I pick people when I feel safe. I like to do that too.

But it is stupid for a girl to ask for another after a lift. They mistake your picking them up as a sign you are interested in them and as such will start their ATM-centric behaviour. They believe you will ask for number afterwards. You have done nothing wrong...

abeg this "Long distance" where is it? I need a ride from mainland to Lekki. lemme come and book space in your car

anathemiamia:


abeg this "Long distance" where is it? I need a ride from mainland to Lekki. lemme come and book space in your car

Lol...on one simple condition

alexohams2000:


Lol...on one simple condition

no touching and no lewd gist

anathemiamia:


no touching and no lewd gist

u

Don't mention! Granted before you asked.