My husband of 40 years tells me I'm gullible and naïve to the world around us. About 5 years ago I received friend notification on facebook from a guy saying he was white, in the navy and feeling down and out. We chatted for weeks and we told each other many personal details about ourselves. At some point he sent me pictures of himself, I did the same and then he started asking for money, small amounts at first $50-$100 US) which I sent him without my husband suspecting anything via Western Union. I sent them to Lagos Nigeria and started questioning a little more and he then confided that he wasn't white and he actually lived in Nigeria which was where I sent the money. At some point we started talking over the phone and due to cost we used an app on the internet as well to chat live like a phone call. He then said he had initially contacted me so con me or scam money from me but could no longer tell a lie or scam me any longer begging for forgiveness because he had fallen in love with me and wanted to come clean so we could further a relationship. I had told him early in the conversations that I was a married person with 4 kids and even given many details about them and shared pictures with him. He even said he wanted to marry me but couldn't come to the US to do so, he didn't have any money. By this time I had sent him over $5000. I told him that I was unhappy in my current marriage and was contemplating divorce but hadn't done anything about it. At some point my kids started to notice I was speaking with a Nigerian man and started telling him to leave me along (kids want to protect their family and keep it together). He was very harsh with them and threatened to hurt them, and even told them that he and I would be married and they would have to call him there father. I smoothed things over with my kids by telling them he was a con man and I was playing him, never told them about the money I had sent. This Nigerian man and I kept our relationship going for 4 years and then he asked/invited me to come over their, get married and then I could bring him to the US so he could start a business and become a US citizen. I was really curious about this guy and he was telling me all the things my husband wasn't and I became curious and agreed eventually to come over to Nigeria. I bought a round trip plane ticket, for 15 days, went over their without telling my family what or where I really was. He and his brother met me at the airport in Abuja, took me to a hotel where we stayed the entire 15 days I was there. He told me when he met me for the first time that we were getting married in a week (7 days from my arrival day) and wanted me to meet his entire family before we tied the knot. I did and became friends with all of them, they were wonderful people. I never told them I was or had been married, but he knew the entire time I was married to an American (I am also American). On the 7th day we went to some place to get married, I was given a wedding rob by his mother, we were taken into separate rooms, I was told this was part of the process to marry a non-Nigerian in Nigeria. I was asked a number of questions about how long I had known him among them and if I had ever been married to someone else. I told them I was divorced but unable to produce court papers stating this. They told me I would have to send the documents to them within 21 days, then the marriage would be legal. I signed the marriage book as did he, the ceremony happened, they took pictures and everything. I left Nigeria 7 days later going back to my husband of 40 years. We have had many hard times since I left, because I left and I told him everything that happened both before and after returned from Nigeria. I even asked for a divorce so I could bring this man from Nigeria to the US. He said NO, we are married for life. I am still married to my husband, but still talking with this man over in Nigeria. Since I have been back, my husband is attempting to forgive me, however I keep doing stupid things. I have sent this Nigerian man, more than $4000 to stop bothering my children because that was causing many issues with them he was also harassing all of them. I'm now concerned that I might be married to this guy in Nigeria and my husband here in the US. He keeps contacting me, calling me the love of his life. I try not to talk with him, he keeps calling and messaging me via facebook stating he will start harassing my family if I don't send him money. Then when I do, I hear nothing for a couple of weeks then it starts all over again. How can I get this guy to leave me and my real family alone. Is there anyway he can get in trouble for knowingly marring a non-Nigerian who is still married?

OMG !

ConfusedinIS All i'll say is your Nigerian trip is nothing more than an adventure.
Count your monetary losses and move on with your life.

Its official
Women don't even know what they want
Well.. Being an ATM machine for any Goon living in Nigeria isn't much Profitable diss days
You can do Better

but the story I saw earlier today on another thread, said the marriage was 30 years.

People are foolish sha. Sorry ma i dont insult people or make comments like this, but i believe your case is an exception . So white people are really this dull . Your case is beyond me oo

As for the statement made about this in another thread, actually I have been married for a little more than 30 years but with this same man for over 40 years. I told my husband 5 months ago, I had ended all contact with the guy in Nigeria after my husband's best friend died in a car accident. However I still talk to him on a weekly basis. I know this sounds stupid of me for continuing my contact with him. I am afraid he will contact my family or worse start posting on Facebook again showing picture of the 2 of us when I was there. or worse start sending messages to my kids about me saying that I am married to him and that sort of stuff. Since my return from Nigeria he has managed to stir up trouble with my entire family every time there is a significant event in our lives, my wedding anniversary and birthdays for all family members. I am not sure if I should contact the police in Nigeria to see if they can get him to leave me and my family alone.

Are you kidding me, Oh my world

ConfusedinIS:
My husband of 40 years tells me I'm gullible and naïve to the world around us. About 5 years ago I received friend notification on facebook from a guy saying he was white, in the navy and feeling down and out. We chatted for weeks and we told each other many personal details about ourselves. At some point he sent me pictures of himself, I did the same and then he started asking for money, small amounts at first $50-$100 US) which I sent him without my husband suspecting anything via Western Union. I sent them to Lagos Nigeria and started questioning a little more and he then confided that he wasn't white and he actually lived in Nigeria which was where I sent the money. At some point we started talking over the phone and due to cost we used an app on the internet as well to chat live like a phone call. He then said he had initially contacted me so con me or scam money from me but could no longer tell a lie or scam me any longer begging for forgiveness because he had fallen in love with me and wanted to come clean so we could further a relationship. I had told him early in the conversations that I was a married person with 4 kids and even given many details about them and shared pictures with him. He even said he wanted to marry me but couldn't come to the US to do so, he didn't have any money. By this time I had sent him over $5000. I told him that I was unhappy in my current marriage and was contemplating divorce but hadn't done anything about it. At some point my kids started to notice I was speaking with a Nigerian man and started telling him to leave me along (kids want to protect their family and keep it together). He was very harsh with them and threatened to hurt them, and even told them that he and I would be married and they would have to call him there father. I smoothed things over with my kids by telling them he was a con man and I was playing him, never told them about the money I had sent. This Nigerian man and I kept our relationship going for 4 years and then he asked/invited me to come over their, get married and then I could bring him to the US so he could start a business and become a US citizen. I was really curious about this guy and he was telling me all the things my husband wasn't and I became curious and agreed eventually to come over to Nigeria. I bought a round trip plane ticket, for 15 days, went over their without telling my family what or where I really was. He and his brother met me at the airport in Abuja, took me to a hotel where we stayed the entire 15 days I was there. He told me when he met me for the first time that we were getting married in a week (7 days from my arrival day) and wanted me to meet his entire family before we tied the knot. I did and became friends with all of them, they were wonderful people. I never told them I was or had been married, but he knew the entire time I was married to an American (I am also American). On the 7th day we went to some place to get married, I was given a wedding rob by his mother, we were taken into separate rooms, I was told this was part of the process to marry a non-Nigerian in Nigeria. I was asked a number of questions about how long I had known him among them and if I had ever been married to someone else. I told them I was divorced but unable to produce court papers stating this. They told me I would have to send the documents to them within 21 days, then the marriage would be legal. I signed the marriage book as did he, the ceremony happened, they took pictures and everything. I left Nigeria 7 days later going back to my husband of 40 years. We have had many hard times since I left, because I left and I told him everything that happened both before and after returned from Nigeria. I even asked for a divorce so I could bring this man from Nigeria to the US. He said NO, we are married for life. I am still married to my husband, but still talking with this man over in Nigeria. Since I have been back, my husband is attempting to forgive me, however I keep doing stupid things. I have sent this Nigerian man, more than $4000 to stop bothering my children because that was causing many issues with them he was also harassing all of them. I'm now concerned that I might be married to this guy in Nigeria and my husband here in the US. He keeps contacting me, calling me the love of his life. I try not to talk with him, he keeps calling and messaging me via facebook stating he will start harassing my family if I don't send him money. Then when I do, I hear nothing for a couple of weeks then it starts all over again. How can I get this guy to leave me and my real family alone. Is there anyway he can get in trouble for knowingly marring a non-Nigerian who is still married?