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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / Yes, It Is Definitely Possible To Be Friends With Your Ex (551 Views)
4 Reasons Why You Can't Be "Just Friends" With Your Ex / If He Behaves In These 7 Ways, He Definitely Wants To Taste Your Honey Pot / She Suddenly Made A U-turn And Said We Can Only Be Friends. (2) (3) (4)
Yes, It Is Definitely Possible To Be Friends With Your Ex by 0ubenji(m): 5:39pm On Jul 17, 2016 |
I’ve never understood the idea that you can’t be friends with an ex. I mean, to some extent I get it, especially given the circumstances. Perhaps if you end on bad terms, perhaps if there’s underlying anger, it’d be tough to be friends. But over time, after growing apart, it’s definitely possible to care about someone you used to love on a friendship-level. Personally, I don’t know how you couldn’t. You used to love this person. Aren’t they worth enough to still be a part of your life? ------------------------------------------ Being friends with your ex is hard at first. You have to let go of a lot of things, emotionally detach yourself in many ways, and truly devote yourself to the idea of friendship—of caring for someone with honesty, and no selfish desires or strings attached. ------------------------------------------- To be friends with an ex, you have to first acknowledge whether or not you have the ability to. If you’re hoping to get back together in the near future, if you’re hoping to fall back in love, then you’re not truly wanting to be friends. You’re looking for a relationship. Then you have to be honest. This means that when you spend time with that person, you aren’t sugar-coating yourself, or your reaction to them because you have feelings for them. You talk to them truthfully, as you would any friend. And you learn to love them in a different way, as a person rather than a lover. ------------------------------------------ Then you open yourself up. You allow yourself to truly be friends with this person. To not only laugh at the same jokes and go to the same places with your group of friends, but genuinely give a sh*t about their life. You ask them about the potential dates they’re talking to, about the crap going on with their family, about their biggest fears. You trust them with things that are important to you, and you keep things exactly as they are—a friendship, a strong bond. Then you define boundaries. You don’t call that person for every little thing that’s going wrong. You definitely don’t call them when you fight with a current boyfriend or girlfriend. You let them into your life, but you give them space, too. You don’t dip back into the past unless talking about it serves some purpose for your current relationships. You don’t reminisce in an unhealthy, missing-you type of way. And you stick to your values—you don’t kiss, you don’t cuddle, you don’t flirt because that would not be a friendship. ---------------------------------------------------- Ultimately, you love. You love this person innocently and platonically. You love this person because they hold a huge chunk of you in their palms. They know the past you, the you-you underneath the layers and walls that may have built over time. And you know them. So you care about one another, you keep one another in your lives, and you talk about the hard stuff—love, breakups, new relationships— building one another up and caring about each other’s wellbeing because even though that person plays a different role in your life, they matter. And in a healthy, not-ruining- your-current-relationships type of way, they always will. |
Re: Yes, It Is Definitely Possible To Be Friends With Your Ex by Lovelynature(m): 5:48pm On Jul 17, 2016 |
Yes, distant friendship |
Re: Yes, It Is Definitely Possible To Be Friends With Your Ex by ENIGMA24(m): 5:49pm On Jul 17, 2016 |
In my view... The only reasons a GUY would want to remain frnds with his ex is.. 1) if he feels guilty for breaking her heart 2) if his current relationship isnt as rosey as he anticipated 3) friends with benefit 4) new girlfrnd is as ugly as hell 5) he just wants to cheat.... Bottom line.... If u can be mere frnds with your ex.... Its either of two things U never stopped loving her Or U never loved her! 1 Like |
Re: Yes, It Is Definitely Possible To Be Friends With Your Ex by Jay542(m): 5:50pm On Jul 17, 2016 |
It's possible but when you're married it's wrong to be close pals with your ex. 1 Like |
Re: Yes, It Is Definitely Possible To Be Friends With Your Ex by Nobody: 5:54pm On Jul 17, 2016 |
I don't think so this is possible... No offense but I can't lick what I spat... Not even for a mere friendship... |
Re: Yes, It Is Definitely Possible To Be Friends With Your Ex by mizzbouqui(f): 5:58pm On Jul 17, 2016 |
Nope from me |
Re: Yes, It Is Definitely Possible To Be Friends With Your Ex by Nobody: 6:10pm On Jul 17, 2016 |
Op..continue dey deceive yrsef.. U cnt b frends wit an ex... chikena... |
Re: Yes, It Is Definitely Possible To Be Friends With Your Ex by AbuMikey(m): 6:14pm On Jul 17, 2016 |
I agree fully. Its very possible, but it depends on if Your ex wants to be friends with You. |
Re: Yes, It Is Definitely Possible To Be Friends With Your Ex by serah88: 7:03pm On Jul 17, 2016 |
Never in my lifetime will I agree to be friends with my immediate ex. The thought of it could make me throw up given the way I was treated. Sometimes, I even feel like laying curse on him. |
Re: Yes, It Is Definitely Possible To Be Friends With Your Ex by 0ubenji(m): 7:13pm On Jul 17, 2016 |
serah88:Mehn..dis is serious!! |
Re: Yes, It Is Definitely Possible To Be Friends With Your Ex by bitchcrafts: 7:15pm On Jul 17, 2016 |
serah88:Hahahahahah. |
Re: Yes, It Is Definitely Possible To Be Friends With Your Ex by EOOJ(m): 7:25pm On Jul 17, 2016 |
Well if u ask me, been friends wit an ex is very possible...most ppl are just probably blinded or following d genera band wagon. it is way easier been a friend to an ex u neva had any sexxxual encounter wit but quite hard wit someone u hav slept with. Overall its possible...my take |
Re: Yes, It Is Definitely Possible To Be Friends With Your Ex by Nobody: 7:27pm On Jul 17, 2016 |
Not if he bitter I know. |
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