No 9 is a great position to occupy because once she "remembers" to call or ping you, you already know what she wants.

vikono:
I was once ABF finance to one calabar girl
wetin dis girl take my eyes see eh,na only God knw
so tey i get admission but i no fit enter school

But dis my current girl na me be MBF and i'm proud about it

My brother if u never carry wine go her papa house u no be MBF
Dont deceive urself...na one cool morning she go give u invitation card to her wedding na there ur eye go clear
if u like it put a ring on it

MizTyna:
Lol! This is one of the realest threads on nairaland. I'm not saying I have ABFs oh

Virgin mary

Bekwara na lie, you be woman. Or e be like say you get female peeps dem plenty. So true..

BuzzRay:
lol, pls i wanna see a counter thread about AGF soon.

I have a friend whos in the repair and maintenance category, there's this gal he helps to all sort of stuff, from painting to repairing of doors, cementing holes, fixing mosquitoe nets nawa o

and when the girl comes to pass the night at his house, they both sing love songs all night, noting more. The guy go come out for morning they vex. Lol

Hahahhahaha

#9 sha

Wow, u so creative.

In ma own case i hv been an MBF to jxt 1 gurl for d lst 2yrs buh b4 dx i ws a complete ABF to diff gurls who r either still ma fwends or hv been cut off nd trust me i learnt lotta lessons frm dm.. .. .. . GIRLS CN B SO FRUSTRATN.

EBBari:
Wow, u so creative.

In ma own case i hv been an MBF to jxt 1 gurl for d lst 2yrs buh b4 dx i ws a complete ABF to diff gurls who r either still ma fwends or hv been cut off nd trust me i learnt lotta lessons frm dm.. .. .. . GIRLS CN B SO FRUSTRATN.

Especially ABF Emotional affairs [size=8pt][/size]

FakoMaybach1:
My own case sometimes i think i am supernaturally stupid or worse
I remember writing exams of 6 courses out of 9 for one girl during my university days ..Cynthia was her name, all i got was a peck and small smooching for the calculation courses

Aby na when i go write statistics exam for another babe and was caught: i was almost rusticated i had to flee through the bush..that one didnt even bother to talk to me again

University was hell for me, Kongy holo me so tey i started walking like Robo-cop, na one villager pity my ministry just give me one hand

Even now wey i don get job na so so bill dem dey match me ' please give me 5k to buy medicine ..i come dey wonder which medicine na 5k na HIV drugs?...one dey match me bill according to weather forecast 10k during dry season, 5k during raining season now wey harmattan don dey come i wonder wetin she go match me

But i don give up on babes cus no be my luck, make i focus on my carrier if i see marry thank God if i no see kwanu i no go kill myself

Bros aswear u no go kill me with laff. I laff sotey water dey comot for my eyes.

Bekwarra:

Naso one girl carry her laptop come my room that time make I help am do assignment o. The girl no even dey my department. I rush go online, check all the soft copies of materials wey dey her system. I use two days do assignment as per say I wan do better job. After I don type finish I carry system dey go her hostel. As I don dey near na hin I call her say I don almost reach o. Naso the werey girl. Talk say "hey sweetheart I'm very sorry I'm in Daniel's place off-campus. He's sick and I've gone to help him cook. Can you please help me bring it tomorrow morning when coming to the faculty." I just stand there they look like mumu. Daniel na guy wey she tell me say na her toaster who just dey disturb her and she don tell am say dem no fit date. My creator will never forgive that girl.

.

Lol ... Girls and lie ehh. Somebody gimme that zouma pisss

Bekwarra:

Bros aswear u no go kill me with laff. I laff sotey water dey comot for my eyes.

It sounds funny now but when i was running through the bush after i was caught trying to write exams for that babe it wasnt funny oo

women can be really mean, na why i don hang boot

You cracked me up dude, damm hilarious

dollyjoy:
Eeeewwwwwwwwu!

Nne why kwanu...?

dollyjoy:
Eeeewwwwwwwwu!

Which one is yours?

Bekwarra:
E get times wey be say u go buy carton of indomie keep for house. Out of 40 u no go chop reach 5. Some girls are always perpetually and eternally hungry.

Like some Akoka girls I know.

Dey eat like an hippocampus wey don observe 40days dry-fasting and see the mgbekes; dem lekpacious pass i-go-dye.

No infrastructure, nothing! You go wan sabi manage her small on top say she get flows plus the dead-brazillian's weaves. But she ?! Na how to chop your pocket like DSS swallowing Dasuki.she go dey plot smh?!

yimu

MizTyna:
Lol! This is one of the realest threads on nairaland. I'm not saying I have ABFs oh

That place I belong no good atall ooo

jubrealguy:
That place I belong no good atall ooo

Talk am we fit help you for prayer.

Bekwarra:
There is a set of guys we popularly call assistant boyfriends. Just like the name suggests they are assistants to the real boyfriends. Some people might mistake it for a friend zoned guy but they are different. An assistant boyfriend is the mid-point between the real bobo and the one who has a duplex in friend zone avenue. The type of assistant boyfriend a guy is and the level of smartness will determine whether he becomes the main bobo or the friend-zoned one.
Assistant boyfriends are important to most ladies because they play active and decisive roles to them and like I opined earlier, an assistant boyfriend has a good chance of upgrading to the main guy or downgrading to a friend-zoning. ABF as I will refer to it subsequently is not as good as being the main bobo but it's definitely better than being in friend zone. One thing I want us to note is that many of us have been ABFs at different times. While some of us have ended up as main guys some among us also have become BOT chairmen as friend zone corporation. For others in multiple relationships, you might be a main guy in one and ABF in another.

Here are the 10 types of ABFs from my observations.
1. ABF Finance
He is the Dangote and Bill Gate rolled into one. The real money bag so to say. He's in charge of all her finances. The wicked ladies might want to refer to him as "maga" or "mugu" but that's unfair because bros is only being generous. Whenever she wants to pay her school fees, rent a new apartment, pay her rent that's due or go on a shopping spree, his name is the one that pops up in her head. He's the financier and caters for her financial needs. If he's smart enough he might get more than the hugs and kisses and get to visit Aso Rock Villa but you can never tell with some guys. Dear lady are you feeling broke? Please look for an ABF Finance.

2. ABF Emotional Affairs
He's in charge of emotional matters. He's most susceptible to ending up in a friend zone. He's very close to the lady and also a confidante but that's also his albatross. He's knows everything that goes up in her relationship and acts as the chief adviser. He also advises her on who to date and who not to. You'll always hear things like "Wristbangle see David has started again o, he's no longer picking my calls" or "Tosyne2much can you believe Akin used another girl's picture as his dp?" Or "smellymouth do you know that cute guy in our department? He just asked me out, should I tell him yes? Whenever she has issues with her bf or gets heartbroken, it's the work of the ABF Emotional Affairs to provide emotional support; a shoulder to cry on. In fact some go the extent of having the contact of the main nigga and act as mediators whenever there's a conflict. I was once in this category with a girl but in my own case a shoulder to cry on became a deek to ride on.

3. ABF Religious Affairs
He's the brother in the lord. They are mostly Bro David, Bro Samuel and Bro Joshua. Bros sees her as the one whom God might have chosen for him but she sees him as just her brother in the lord. On campus, he's always coming to share tracts and devotionals with her. They read and study the bible together. They pray together. In fact if she has problems, bros sometimes to join her in fasting or even fast on her behalf. But because of his religious creed, he cannot even ask her out straight up. They are both workers in the fellowship and while Bro John hopes and pray God opens her eyes to see him as her dream husband, sister Rebecca continues going off campus to spend the weekend with Lalasticlal.a the main guy. At home, they know him in her house as the brother who comes every evening to do voice training with sister Hannah and discuss biblical issues with her. They know that every Sunday morning Bro Rasaq must come to their house to remind Sister Balqiz that they will be going for Nasfat prayers that morning.

4. ABF Stomach Infrastructure
Like the name suggests, he's responsible for stomach affairs. She remembers him whenever she goes hungry. He's the one that takes her out for meals, buys her snacks and drinks. Whenever she feels like taking peppersoup and malt on a friday night, his name comes into remembrance. You'll hear things like "and I feel like eating Shawarma oooo. Ok let me call kinglekan" I know many of these guys back on campus then. They are always ready to take the girls out to Tantalizers, Spices to take peppersoup and sminrnoff or to eat Amala Skye bank in Bodija with assorted meat yet they can't buy even one bottle of Satzenbrau for their guys. At the end of it all na ordinary hug u go collect as thank you while she uses the energy given to her buy the food you bought to ride the main nigga to heaven.

5. ABF Repairs and Maintenance
Baba is always the one responsible for repairs and maintenance of household items. If you fall under this category, you know yourself. You are always remembered when her wall socket gets burnt, she wants to change the bulb, her wristwatch suddenly stops working, her laptop needs to be reformatted, her small tiger gen is refusing to start or her extension bo blew off, then you fall under this category. Well December is almost here and she wants to repaint her room, bro go and get some of your clothes you no longer wear, change into them and grab the goddamn paint container and brush abeg.

This is hilarious. As i read through i realized i had an ABF for all the categories u mentioned. No be me send them message o, na dem carry theirself give theirself work. Hahahahahahaha

Btw are u from Bekwarra?

Felincous:


b4 nko?

But shey you no say another dude fit still dey run her

No. 9 is less expensive.

Heartibaby:


This is hilarious. As i read through i realized i had an ABF for all the categories u mentioned. No be me send them message o, na dem carry theirself give theirself work. Hahahahahahaha

Btw are u from Bekwarra?

No I'm not from Bekwarra but I love Bekwarra. Errrm *scratches head* in case you want to replace number 9 sha.

Op....................... You try!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ABF 1 is , everyother ABF's is not important

olaifeboy:
which am sure your are our GCFR; rubbish talk from rotten brain

Try to always be civilised when in public especially forums. There is no cause for foul language especially when everyone here is jes having fun. Peace

Bekwarra:

No I'm not from Bekwarra but I love Bekwarra. Errrm *scratches head* in case you want to replace number 9 sha.

Haha. Nice try. I said 'i had'. I dont have them anymore. What i have is an all round hubby. Meets all the needs. No need for ABF.

*wipes tears* one of the deepest shiiix I've read in my life

Bekwarra:

Naso one girl carry her laptop come my room that time make I help am do assignment o. The girl no even dey my department. I rush go online, check all the soft copies of materials wey dey her system. I use two days do assignment as per say I wan do better job. After I don type finish I carry system dey go her hostel. As I don dey near na hin I call her say I don almost reach o. Naso the werey girl. Talk say "hey sweetheart I'm very sorry I'm in Daniel's place off-campus. He's sick and I've gone to help him cook. Can you please help me bring it tomorrow morning when coming to the faculty." I just stand there they look like mumu. Daniel na guy wey she tell me say na her toaster who just dey disturb her and she don tell am say dem no fit date. My creator will never forgive that girl.

Bekwarra:

Naso one girl carry her laptop come my room that time make I help am do assignment o. The girl no even dey my department. I rush go online, check all the soft copies of materials wey dey her system. I use two days do assignment as per say I wan do better job. After I don type finish I carry system dey go her hostel. As I don dey near na hin I call her say I don almost reach o. Naso the werey girl. Talk say "hey sweetheart I'm very sorry I'm in Daniel's place off-campus. He's sick and I've gone to help him cook. Can you please help me bring it tomorrow morning when coming to the faculty." I just stand there they look like mumu. Daniel na guy wey she tell me say na her toaster who just dey disturb her and she don tell am say dem no fit date. My creator will never forgive that girl.

Heheheheh...this cracked me real hard. Unfortunately, I belong to more than one of this your list.....heheheheh. This is a fantastic write up...you're sure a raw talent. You can please drop your mail, i gat some jobs for ya if you've gat free time...(part of a panel to proof read a book). I will pay ya handsomely. Besides, your moniker sounds like a place between Northern Cross river state and Benue state... Errmmm...on that Kastina Ala expressway.

im okay with number 9. abf finance ke? in this economy

Jeeeesu...abi e ri aye mi lode bayi?....i jst scan my brain now and discovered dat am ABF Superitendent (just dat my shishi nor dey fall)...bt ABF kpanshin is wat is consoling me now

chai... I used to be a real ABF. Now if you no direct me to #9, I no dey send you anymore.